LETTER LVI
MRS. NORTON, TO MISS CLARISSA HARLOWEFRIDAY, JULY 28.
MY DEAREST YOUNG LADY,
I have the consolation to tell you that my son is once again in a hopefulway, as to his health. He desires his duty to you. He is very low andweak. And so am I. But this is the first time that I have been able,for several days past, to sit up to write, or I would not have been solong silent.
Your letter to your sister is received and answered. You have the answerby this time, I suppose. I wish it may be to your satisfaction: but amafraid it will not: for, by Betty Barnes, I find they were in a greatferment on receiving your's, and much divided whether it should beanswered or not. They will not yet believe that you are so ill, as [tomy infinite concern] I find you are. What passed between Miss Harloweand Miss Howe has been, as I feared it would be, an aggravation.
I showed Betty two or three passages in your letter to me; and she seemedmoved, and said, She would report them favourably, and would procure me avisit from Miss Harlowe, if I would promise to show the same to her. ButI have heard no more of that.
Methinks, I am sorry you refuse the wicked man: but doubt not,nevertheless, that your motives for doing so are more commendable than mywishes that you would not. But as you would be resolved, as I may say,on life, if you gave way to such a thought; and as I have so muchinterest in your recovery; I cannot forbear showing this regard tomyself; and to ask you, If you cannot get over your just resentments?--But I dare say no more on this subject.
What a dreadful thing indeed was it for my dearest tender young lady tobe arrested in the streets of London!--How does my heart go over againand again for you, what your's must have suffered at that time!--Yetthis, to such a mind as your's, must be light, compared to what you hadsuffered before.
O my dearest Miss Clary, how shall we know what to pray for, when wepray, but that God's will may be done, and that we may be resigned to it!--When at nine years old, and afterwards at eleven, you had a dangerousfever, how incessantly did we grieve, and pray, and put up our vows tothe Throne of Grace, for your recovery!--For all our lives were bound upin your life--yet now, my dear, as it has proved, [especially if we aresoon to lose you,] what a much more desirable event, both for you and forus, would it have been, had we then lost you!
A sad thing to say! But as it is in pure love to you that I say it, andin full conviction that we are not always fit to be our own choosers, Ihope it may be excusable; and the rather, as the same reflection willnaturally lead both you and me to acquiesce under thedispensation; since we are assured that nothing happens by chance; andthe greatest good may, for aught we know, be produced from the heaviestevils.
I am glad you are with such honest people; and that you have all youreffects restored. How dreadfully have you been used, that one should beglad of such a poor piece of justice as that!
Your talent at moving the passions is always hinted at; and this Betty ofyour sister's never comes near me that she is not full of it. But, asyou say, whom has it moved, that you wished to move? Yet, were it notfor this unhappy notion, I am sure your mother would relent. Forgive me,my dear Miss Clary; for I must try one way to be convinced if my opinionbe not just. But I will not tell you what that is, unless it succeeds.I will try, in pure duty and love to them, as to you.
May Heaven be your support in all your trials, is the constant prayer, mydearest young lady, of
Your ever affectionate friend and servant,JUDITH NORTON.