*I wrote this when I was 18 or 19. Bear that in mind when reading.
I hope you hurry
Before I piss my pants.
Oh shit!
I messed up
And missed my chance.
I didn't realize it would be like this.
I still can't see
Why it turned out like it did.
I've scattered my ashes and shed my tears,
Tattered my clothes and said my fears
To the one who made me trust her,
The one that said she loved me
While she said fuck you
To the world she ran through
And stole my innocence in return
And rekindled a swindled heart in turn.
Did she ever feel the way it burned,
My pain disguising itself
To hide the help I headed for
And deride the dead deeds done no more.
I know no noble notions.
I am facing unforetold fears.
I am swimming among oceans of pass-me-by years.
I wish I would wash away the way it was
And go back to a time
When I wasn't living for lust.
My mind is a torment I represent.
It tells me my heart is no longer a must.
Scratch that.
Erase the trust.
Don't fret or fuss
Over bullshit stuff.
It's only there to lead you down,
Gone to a hurt of personal hell,
A sin within that you can't foretell
To a teller trying to sell her soul for pennies.
My mind is gone.
I've had it off more than I've had it on.
My blind eye is drawn to envy.
I don't sell it,
But I smell it,
And I felt it,
All the bullshit that we see.
I can never tell
What all is well,
But it's not so well for me.
I'm dead inside,
Deep inside,
Unable to see the selfish side.
Don't set me
A pretty petty
Weak and weary
Shitty gritty
Greeting from beyond.
I walk a wild and worn out path
Past a person impersonating
The idiosyncratic psychopathic personalities
Of a drastic spastic penalty
Purged on people finding very little love
In an uncaring world of hate undebatable.
There is no comfort zone in a broken home.
Don't you hear my god **** tone?
I can't lend a loan
From what's not my own.
I move slow, alone
And fast afraid.
We got it made
For the few moments we stayed
And played away
So the sour could say
Curses against the day
But wouldn't go away
And wanted to make us pay
With money we couldn't raise
As forced out slaves.
I wish I wasn't so fuckin sober so often.
I need some shit to ease my constant coughin’.
I'll be in a coffin sooner than I wanna be
If I don't get some shit to help me see
The struggles I'm gonna see.
I'm altering the free things
That are here for us all.
Life is a strife to let you ignore the fall.
I am an underachiever,
A false believer.
I am never home to receive my calls.
I'm sure we could reach a preacher to deceive us all.
Thank you for not thinking of me.
Remember the mind-bender
Beginning from me.
I'm bathing in a taking
That's sickening me,
Making me drunk
On hellhole telltale tolerances
Of habits remaining
In the morning sun's appearance.
I'm shaking shitfaced shallow showoffs
And igniting the ticking time bomb about to blow off
I'm dead inside,
Deep inside,
Unable to see the selfish side.
Don't set me
A pretty petty
Weak and weary
Shitty gritty
Greeting from beyond.
I walk a wild and worn out path
Past a person impersonating
The idiosyncratic psychopathic personalities
Of a drastic spastic penalty
Purged on people finding very little love
In an uncaring world of hate undebatable.
Say you're sorry
For what you've done.
We lost the fun
We thought we had.
It all went bad
When we sunk to sad.
It makes me glad
To see my enemies mad
Cuz I don't give a fuck.
The game is up.
My name is stuck
On some absent luck.
I don't get a suck.
Go suck a rock.
You can't suck my cock.
I never knocked her off.
The shit she's got
Is just the flu.
I never penetrated through
The thickass slip
Of her in between the pussylips.
Don't talk like a little kid.
I know the bad shit you did.
It ain't hid from me.
I'm running a race
To hide this face,
But she don't run me.
I gotta ride
Far from pride
And be alive inside
And get powered past her bitching.
She best not make a sound.
I want only silence.
I prayed it wouldn't lead to violence.
But regrets forget the shit I get
From the times she tried to beat me down.
I sent her the center of my being.
She fucked it up and slammed it down,
And she's repeating.
The outstretched hand
From this broken man
Was caught bleeding.
She's still feeding into the lies she told me.
I despise her more mostly.
Fuck her for her fastly forwarding fronts
Of deceit and corruption.
I will corrupt her confusion.
The contusion I got with my concussion
Is the newest point of our discussion mentioned.
I don't believe her true intentions.
I'm dead inside,
Deep inside,
Unable to see the selfish side.
Don't set me
A pretty petty
Weak and weary
Shitty gritty
Greeting from beyond.
I walk a wild and worn out path
Past a person impersonating
The idiosyncratic psychopathic personalities
Of a drastic spastic penalty
Purged on people finding very little love
In an uncaring world of hate undebatable.
I'm so dead inside,
Not as deep inside,
That I can't at least sometimes see my selfish side.
Just don't set me
Any pretty petty
Weak and weary
Shitty gritty
Greetings.
I walk on a wild and worn out road,
Never knowing what's owed.
I'm dead inside,
Deep inside,
Unable to see the selfish side.
Don't set me
A pretty petty
Weak and weary
Shitty gritty
Greeting from beyond.
I walk a wild and worn out path
Past a person
impersonating
The idiosyncratic psychopathic personalities
Of a drastic spastic penalty
Purged on people finding very little love
In an uncaring world of hate undebatable.
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