Come, Come!
Copyright 2013 Eric Lisitsa
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Welcome
This story begins with salty tears and the splash in my face from angry waves. There, I said it. There was my home.
Salt and sand.
Blue and yellow.
Back in my gray mind I can't think of a time without that fine warm breeze. The thing is - and only this - that was my home.
There, I said it - again.
Can I go back? To fine grains of sand or salty tears? There I go, my mind wanders.
This trail of water in my face led me pointing down, following to the ground - encountering not a stream, but the horizon.
There, but I can't find a way to say this. It was in May, it was in May. The month, the day! It was when I made that place my home.
Come, come!
Make yourself at home.
May the leaves be your roof;
May the sand be your mattress;
May the water be your feast;
Come, come!
May the May come at least.
It was true it wasn't much. But what else could I ask for? There was food, oh, and water a little above. Those and peace, here and there - sounded good. Now I hear myself and I can't believe it.
Can you believe that?
I live. Now I live, but there I lived more - I believe. It was mine, it was my home and it was fine. Can't cut world like that, I know. Can't put myself above the world. But can - and could - say: that piece was mine.
Cut to tragedy.
That day, far from May, I saw the first person to change my world. It was a man - believe it if you can - that thirst brought me from somewhere.
Come, come!
Make yourself at home.
I have water, yes, to spare.
A company you can bear.
And this breeze will never stop.
Come, come!
Make yourself at home.
And he did, he felt. Every feeling I could supply. Everything, oh, that was mine. I lend in good will.
You, you, man of respect.
That give me shelter and a prose.
Your company is not to bear,
But to enjoy.
But to enjoy!
There is no better host.
There I smile, there I do. With my heart all my heart. Give him food I had fruit - and the breeze as usual was warm.
But it was time. It's time. It was then, to say goodbye, when everything changed.
Can I stay by any chance?
That was his line. There, clear as the sky - that one where a bird passed by. Strange thing to say. Think. That was my home. It can't be done.
You can't stay, it's what I say.
Think. It wasn't clear? It can't be done because that was my home.
A splash of salty tear - cold as winter. Why won't he leave? That was my home since I'd come.
Who was he to say I'm wrong?
But that's what he does. Turns and puts firm feet on ground. My mattress.
How can you say such thing?
You claim much land and say it's yours.
You came, empty hand, you have no doors.
And yet you call it home?
I'm shocked. Offensive. Animal! Animal!
I'm done!
This is my home.
Repay is kindness;
respect is enough.
You come and insult, you come and insult.
He leaves. I return to my leaves. Yes, that was an animal. There, I said it, going to his pack - to a whole species. Would he come back?
My home where something I lack. I have sky above and earth for floor, but why not a fence and a door?
Could I do it?
Plenty of time, plenty of wood.
Plenty is mine, plenty of me.
A hammer of coconuts, vine as wire. Here and there. Plenty of room, I work.
My work is to look down, way down to the ground where I pierce my home. No blue, no yellow; no salt just sand; not mattress but ground - where wood can protect me.
There a fence. There's a door. Couldn't make a lock, that was what the vine was for. Soon as I finish comes the knock - shaking my world.
Who goes there, from the other side?
Friend or enemy?
Revenge or need
brings one to knock on this door of mine?
There's no answer, no response. I curse myself under the eyes of sky. Why should curiosity change again my home?
There was a woman. Hair yellow as sand, eyes bluish as salty waters. Maybe a green in there. A tear would be prettier than the horizon, if coming from her.
I gave her food, explained the wood and why she had to knock. We talked about the sky, that one where a bird passed by.
I never found comfort you see,
with so powerful being above me.
It watches, it does.
It watches, I know.
But I have an answer for that. There. Here, as I said.
Power doesn't come from the sky,
or the sun or the bird passing by.
Just admire, just look up.
Now it's you watching him.
And all the sky wants is your attention.
I told the truth, nothing more. What I knew, what I know. But her eyes looked at me kind, does eyes asking to be mine - as a prey in love giving its life.
No that fear I don't have, not anymore.
Not sun nor sand; not water nor that dove.
That one flying high,
hasn't fear neither do I.
Not now when I truly find love.
Then I knew - now I know - that I felt the same. But the sky has to move on. From blue to red, and then to black it goes.
Just to change my home.
Can I stay by any chance?
How this came from that mouth, sweet but venom, saltier than the dark gray around? I gave her food and it was good, but that moment didn't matter.
You can't stay, is what I say. You leave and never come back - to your pack, I believe. Just so far away - just so far away.
But she won't give up.
How can you say such thing?
You opened a door I opened my heart.
I fall in love and you do me harm.
And dare to prefer this you call home.
This is no home.
I wanted me to be one,
a home for you to come.
Speechless at first, enraged at last. How can this monster treat me like that?
You leave and you do it now.
Take your love with you.
Insult me in my own house,
that's something you can't do.
Take your love with you.
And take your love with you.
There was then, there when I witnessed. I tell you, I tell you right - salty tears prettier than the sky.
But not for me, they were not for me. She has to leave, her eyes in grief, and I need to protect my home.
Wood? Too weak, too weak. It's no good. But mud, yes, mud! That one that becomes clay in my hands, steady and strong. A mile high, a mile long. Touching the sky what can go wrong.
The salt now pours my work under sun. Come, come, to dry the sand - now clay. The fence now wall insurmountable. You try, you try. You dare to try.
But somewhere, not just anywhere, the wall can't stay. By water it floats away. Be part of blue, be part of salt. There, there it goes.
And there he comes!
From where my home doesn't protect, this big hole in my world - the empty path from perfect horizon.
It's a big boat, yes it is with all its wood. Inside there's someone bold - confronted the horizon to find my home.
/> Who goes there, I ask.
You who dare to float.
Who's up to such task?
Mocks my walls coming by boat.
But the response was a smile, such warming one. And involved by such enjoyable man I invite him home.
Docked boat, sun high. Look at all this fruits! He tells me stories, from someone who traveled the whole world.
Two times I've sailed
and passed by this point.
All the wonders I visited
let me even more alone.
That's why I came,
where my journey have an end.
In such special place
I dare to say I found a friend!
Why should he be so interested in my home? It's sand and salt, and that's all. Fruits and leaves, yes, but nothing more. Go back to your world. Be gone, be gone - away from my home.
But I didn't see this coming. The traveler asks in advance.
Can I stay by any chance?
Are you mocking me? Conspire, you all. Conspire! You come and inspire, nothing more. Just change, you just change.
And I say no, they should know. My home is mine to live as your fate is yours to leave. Then leave!
But they insist. This one actually grabs my wrist.
Where's his smile? I knew, I did - there's no such thing. Go, go! Leave me alone for a while.
I traveled the world to find this.
A good friend and a fine breeze.
But what is this now?
You don't own it, yellow and blue;
you just live the world like I do.
So don't you dare to call it home.
Betrayal! There was haze - I lost a friend. Friend? I think. I think wrong, of course. He insults me like everyone else. He mocks me another time. Mocks my home, mocks my home.
You go and take your boat.
You go back to your immense world.
But don't you dare
to say it's better there -
just because you insult my home.
Envy, that was. There, I said it. You all envy me now - just like they did then. They don't deserve my home, I wish they’d never come. But how, but how?
They can knock, they can fly.
They can swim or jump high.
But what about being stronger than it all? Can they live without breeze, or open the world? Can they use salty tears to flood my home?
No!
That's when I start digging a hole.
My home's still there, even if you can't see. Can it be? Just believe, just believe. See for yourself and then you leave.
It was small but it was home. The sky I see through this hole; the sand is all around. The fruits I can gather and I still can smell the salt.
You can't penetrate, just can't. It's a job for a god, not for a man.
But then, where do these footsteps come from? It's not a god but a man - believe it if you can.
Obstructing my sky there was a face. He can't come inside but he can see. See. Believe it and then leave.
But he won't go with his big eyes of curiosity. Eyes of a kid, just like mine then - just like mine was. This is empathy.
Who's up there spying on me?
Do you want something
or take me for a freak?
I won't let you enter, but see
that's how my home ended to be.
His eyes widened and I saw some teeth. Eyes of curiosity. Let him be - let him, oh, let him. I answer about my home: how it happened, how I did. Low, down to the ground, how I live.
An answer for a tooth. A spark in the eye - and another, and another. Oh, those eyes, just like mine. Eyes of curiosity.
The sky wasn't so fascinating. Through the hole the stars, I see through the eyes of a kid.
And still is day.
I realize: it is a day in May.
It's perfect. It's all I can say. I have sand - surround. My home is all around. Stay you stay. The eyes, the curiosity - my mind. Let it fly high, up there where his eyes meet mine.
Perfect way to have a home.
Now my work here is done - and I can pass it all to him.
My home then will live on.
But then, you know, the inevitable. Those eyes, those teeth, they inspect. They search for something. Something I can't give. And finally those eyes, yes those, they speak.
Can I stay by any chance?
No. No! I know, I knew. That's all they can do. Why spoil it all?
And there it is, that's the true you -
vile, cruel.
Eyes of a child? Mind of a man.
You destroy what you can
and you always target me.
The spark was gone, those eyes aiming my home, but I wouldn't let him no!
But why do you scream at me?
I just wanted to be here.
You can teach me like you did.
How did you made this
piece of nothing your home.
Insult, insult! It's all they can do. They mock me, envy my home, my life. I'm unique, that's why. Leave me, let me live! I can't believe just can't.
You all - yes you.
That's what you do.
Be gone!
Away from my home
and never come back.
He runs but I keep my voice high. I shout at him, at them,
at god.
Come, come!
Make yourself at home.
That's all you want -
to take it from me.
This piece of land,
the salt and the sand
where I did my home.
Come, come!
Come if you can.
I wait for you as a man.
I kill you all
I kill if you come again.
I scream so loud the sky turns gray. I can't see blue nor yellow, can't find water just sand.
There! There you have it. The thunder and the rain, my breeze turned torment.
Forget me world!
Leave me alone
this is my home!
And I fill that hole, the one connecting me to the world. The water is muffled, the salt is vague.
The sand is black.
Black's my home.
The world can't touch me now.
That's how I should live - yes, now I believe.
Inside my home - all alone - I hear myself say:
Can I stay by any chance?
There, I said it. And there's only an answer - only one.
Yes you can, yes you do.
We and the dark.
Me and the dark.
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