“They’re getting her now. The paramedics are here to help you, but I am not leaving you.”
A flurry of activity surrounded Jake. He did his best to respond to the female paramedic who spoke to him. He gave his name, age, and let her know he had no allergies, but after that his words failed. He watched the faces in front of him, attempting to keep track of each person while someone cut off his clothing. A paramedic applied pressure to his stab wounds and Jake screamed, but his dry throat and mouth muted the sound before it escaped his lips.
The paramedics continued working at breakneck speed, though between the pain and the cold, Jake couldn’t be sure how much time passed while he stared at the sky. The whale in the clouds had long since disappeared, but hard as he tried, Jake could not force his mind to interpret the new shapes the clouds formed.
“Okay, Jake?”
He shifted his eyes until he found the source of the voice and saw the female paramedic who had asked him questions.
“We’re going to move you onto the stretcher.”
His insides curdled as they lifted him several inches off the ground and relocated him onto the stretcher. Jake closed his eyes and gritted his teeth when the stretcher rose into the sky and rolled over the bumpy ground. The paramedics stopped the stretcher near the back of the ambulance and Jake watched two of them climbed into the back of the ambulance in his peripheral vision. Jake caught a glimpse of Shawn standing to the side, having kept his promise not to leave. He used his last remaining strength to grab Shawn’s arm.
Shawn moved closer to the stretcher. “What is it?”
Jake held onto Shawn’s arm until he worked up his ability to speak. “Em,” he said within a jagged, raspy breath.
“She’s coming,” Shawn said.
“We have to take him now,” a male paramedic said. “We can’t wait any longer.”
“Just one more second,” Shawn said. “Give him one more second.”
“He doesn’t have another second.”
“We found her, sir,” a new voice said from somewhere around Shawn. “He must have given her something because she freaked out when we tried to free her. She’s coming, though.”
“Find out what he gave her so we can tell the paramedics,” Shawn said.
Shawn had barely stopped speaking when Emily stood over Jake. She looked him over and grabbed his hand. She glanced at someone out of Jake’s view. “Is he going to be okay?”
“We have to get him to the hospital now,” the paramedic said. “You need to go as well.”
She lowered her eyes to Jake. The blood streaking down her cheek alongside her tears frightened him about what other wounds she might have. “You have to go,” she said. “I’ll be right behind you, I promise.”
Emily’s face blurred, and Jake moved his lips without sound. He wanted to tell her, needed for her to know before the ambulance left her behind, but nothing came out of his mouth except a groan. Jake stopped trying to talk and focused on her eyes and her warm hand in his.
I love you. I love you. I love you.
He repeated the words in his mind over and over as fast as he could. He heard paramedics tell her they were leaving, but he did not stop his mantra. A black void threatened to swallow the world around him, but he was determined not to leave until he got through to her.
I love you. I love you. I love you.
Emily squeezed his hand. “I love you, Jake.”
His hand slipped out of hers and he gave into the darkness.
Chapter Seventy-two
Sitting in Marta’s comfortable office, Emily focused all of her attention on the cookie in her hand. The past four months had been challenging for everyone involved in the David Noakes case, and it was all she could do not to think about it. After Shawn fired the shot that ended David’s life, Emily’s own life became a whirlwind of police questions and keeping vigil at Jake’s bedside in the ICU. An emergency surgery claimed his spleen, appendix, gallbladder, a portion of his liver, and part of his small intestine. His unstable condition in those first few days cast a grim shadow over her.
A frequent visitor to the hospital to check on Jake’s recovery, Shawn kept Emily informed of the developments in their investigation into David. At the farmhouse, police discovered plans to take Emily to a remote location in Montana, the same ranch where David’s thirst for killing was first satisfied. A search of the ranch by the FBI uncovered the remains of Julie Kerns. After over a decade of holding out hope for her safe return, Julie’s parents buried her and said their final goodbyes. From the information Cassie provided police, several unsolved murders in various cities were officially tied to David.
Through Shawn’s description of the side effects of ecstasy, along with the sheer volume of the drug found in the farmhouse, David’s motives became clear to Emily. He planned on conditioning her to associate the heightened sensations the drug caused with him. The ranch in Montana provided the isolation required to mold her into what he wanted while keeping her away from the rest of the world. Between providing for her and controlling her with drugs, he might have succeeded.
The police questions started out routinely enough, but morphed into things Emily could not answer. How did David communicate with her? Where was the mail on which Cassie found his address? How did Jake get to the farmhouse so quickly? The questions overwhelmed her and her silence made her feel guilty, so she did the one thing she never thought would happen. She hired Nathan Wolk to speak for her, Jake, and Cassie. With an attorney standing between them and the police, the questions remained unanswered and the authorities soon closed the case on David Noakes.
After two weeks in the ICU, the doctors became sure of Jake’s survival chances and he was moved into a room of his own. Emily thought the cloud she felt during his recovery would lift, but she soon realized what she felt did not stem from her concerns for Jake, but from something much darker that David left behind in her mind. Because he brought the darkness into her life, she assumed it would disappear after he died. Yet four months after his death, she came to accept that the darkness was now part of her, and she might never be free.
Emily kept Jake ignorant about her plight. He had already undergone a second surgery to try and repair the damage to his thigh and was facing another surgery in a week. He required the assistance of a cane to walk, and his leg caused him constant pain. She didn’t want to burden him with the darkness and risk impeding his progress. Her body had long since grown accustomed to its physical manifestation and she no longer became ill. With the physical symptoms gone, she learned to shield the part of her mind that contained the darkness so Jake couldn’t sense it.
Marta and Jake laughed, disturbing her train of thought. For over an hour, he and Marta exchanged stories of the past, talking about Janie, Jake, and Emily as children in her shop. Emily nodded and chuckled at appropriate times, but her thoughts rested solely with the darkness and the pain Jake had suffered because of her.
Jake touched Emily’s arm and she jumped. She apologized for being startled, just as she had countless times before. The darkness kept her on edge, making her believe David was still alive and coming for her. By going against Marta’s warning and opening her mind to find Cassie, she gave him a stronghold that lasted long after his death.
“You’ve been awfully quiet this morning,” Marta said. “Is everything okay?”
Emily smiled to ease Marta’s concerns. She had yet to tell Marta of the darkness, though it would be impossible to keep her ignorant for much longer. “Yes, of course. I’m just thinking about Jake’s surgery.”
“We all want it to help ease his pain,” Marta said. “It’s been a long road, but it will get better for the both of you.”
Jake rose from the couch. “As much as we love being here with you, it’s time we let you get some work done.”
Marta stood up and walked over to him. “I am so glad you stopped by. I want to see you again before your surgery next week.”
“Absolutely,” Jake said, hugging Ma
rta. “We’ll come back before then.”
Emily took her time getting to her feet. “You couldn’t keep us away, not even if you stopped making cookies.”
“Tell Cassie that I’ll have her favorites ready for her whenever she wants to stop by,” Marta said. “She doesn’t need to be such a stranger.”
“I’ll let her know,” Emily said. She moved to give Marta a hug, but Marta stopped her.
“Jake, do you mind giving me a few minutes alone with Emily?”
“Not a problem,” he said.
“Wait, Jake.” Emily took his hand. “I’ll be right back, Marta.” She walked with him just outside of the office and turned to him.
“Are you okay?” he asked. “You have been very quiet all morning.”
“I’m fine.” She lifted her hand to his face and ran her thumb along the scar across his cheek, left by David’s knife. Every time she looked at his handsome face, examined the scar, noticed the slight bump on his nose where it broke, or watched him limp, all she saw was the damage and pain she caused. She gently kissed him. “I just wanted to tell you how much I love you.”
Jake graced her with a smile. “I love you, too, Em.”
He still had the ability to ease the darkness in her mind, and she hated being away from him for even a few minutes. Not wanting to keep Marta waiting, she stepped back. “I won’t be long.”
He nodded and disappeared around the corner.
Back in the office, Emily sat down next to Marta on the couch and sighed. Marta’s talks in private were always emotionally taxing, no matter how helpful they were.
“I know it’s hard for you to be away from Jake,” Marta said.
“Very,” Emily said. “It’s like watching a part of me walk away.”
“It’s the same for him, even though he doesn’t have to battle the darkness.”
Emily bowed her head and moistened her lips. “How long have you known it’s with me?”
“It’s never left you. I didn’t want to bring it up before because you must have your reasons for not telling me, but I can’t ignore it any longer. It’s tearing you apart.”
Living with it on her own was destroying her, Emily thought. Trying to make sure Jake didn’t see it drained her energy and wrenched her soul. “I thought when David died, it would disappear. It’s connected to him, so why is it still here?”
Marta set her hand on top of Emily’s. “When you opened your mind and let him find you, the darkness became a part of you. It found a new home, a place it could reside even though he died.”
“But it’s more than that. I feel him living in it, even more so than when he was alive.”
“It belonged to him. Because he created and owned it, you will feel him there.”
“I can’t keep this up, Marta.” Emily stood up and walked to the other side of the office. She leaned against the wall by the door and crossed her arms. “I just can’t do this anymore. I want to live my life with Jake and forget this ever happened.”
Marta appeared undeterred by Emily’s frustration. “You can’t. There’s no way to get rid of it now. If you let him, Jake can ease the darkness for you, but no one can take it away. That’s the sacrifice you made when you went after Cassie.”
Emily bit her bottom lip and rubbed her forehead. She already knew she would never be free of David, not entirely, but hearing Marta say the words made it real.
“The sooner you tell Jake about it, the sooner the two of you can deal with it. He can help you live with it, but only if you tell him.”
“I’ve tried to tell him,” Emily said. “I’ve tried so many times, but I don’t want him to know David is still with me and that he won’t leave. Jake has already suffered too much. For me to ask him to help me deal with this seems selfish.”
“You blame yourself for Jake’s pain.”
“There’s no one else to blame but me. I willingly exchanged myself for Cassie and I asked Jake to find me. He wouldn’t have been there if it hadn’t been for me.”
Marta walked over to Emily and took her hands. “You didn’t create the monster and you didn’t set him on his path. That was his choice to abuse his gifts and do those horrible things.”
“I know, but I wish Jake hadn’t gone through all this. He only did it because of me. He came so close to dying, and that is my fault.”
“Jake made the decision to find you, to offer his life in place of yours, just as you chose to put yourself in danger to save Cassie. There’s no shame in that and there’s definitely no blame to be had by either of you.”
Everything Marta said was true, and though she had thought it a hundred times before, she had yet to believe the words. “It doesn’t make me any less upset about his pain. I want to take all of it away from him.”
“That’s part of love, always wishing you could take away the pain of the other person.”
“Yes, but because of my decisions, Jake is suffering and the darkness will never leave us alone.”
“The darkness adds a whole new dimension to all of your gifts. I really wish Susan was here to help with this. I’ve talked to others about it, others who may have an idea of what to do, but no one knows how to help. We’re on uncharted territory.”
She had always turned to Marta for answers, and her inability to guide her frightened Emily. “That’s what scares me the most. Not knowing anything about it, not knowing how to deal with it.”
“Are you still having a physical reaction to the darkness?”
“No,” Emily said. “Not for a few months now.”
Marta brushed Emily’s hair away from her face. She studied Emily’s face, and her hands fell down to Emily’s shoulders. “Maybe we’re approaching this in the wrong manner. You should use the darkness.”
“Use it?” Emily asked. “Isn’t that dangerous?”
“Not any more dangerous than ignoring it. If it’s a part of you, then use it, exploit it, grow with it. You’ve already learned how to suppress the physical symptoms, which means you have control over it. Your gifts are far more powerful than they have ever been, more powerful than anything I’ve ever seen, and it’s because of this darkness. Don’t run away from that.”
“But David is part of it,” Emily said. “I don’t want anything to do with him.”
“He may be part of the darkness, but he doesn’t own it anymore. You do. Tell Jake about it and let him be your strength. He can help you harness the power within the darkness and change it into something you can use. You might be surprised where it takes you.”
Hope broke through Emily’s soul for the first time since she realized the darkness was a permanent fixture in her life. Walking toward the front door of Marta’s shop, her last words churned in Emily’s mind. For the decade after Aunt Susan’s death, she relied on herself to get through the twists and turns of her gifts, but with her abilities ever-evolving, she no longer had that luxury. She needed Jake to help guide her, to be her strength.
Emily pushed open the front door and stopped. Jake leaned against the front of his Jeep, waiting for her. She wondered how he had stood there the whole time she was inside, while his leg caused him so much pain.
Jake stood up straight, his right hand resting on the top of his cane. The darkness receded in her mind, like it did every time he was near, and Emily raised her hand to her smiling mouth. Her eyes fell to his outstretched left hand and her racing heart warmed. “All ready?” he asked.
She fixed her stare on the light in his eyes and bit her bottom lip. Everything she needed to curb the darkness, to manipulate it, stood right in front of her. He had always been there, but she had been too blinded by regret to realize it. With Jake, she could defeat David and use the darkness to her advantage. In every aspect of her life, she needed nothing more than him.
Emily walked over to him and slipped her hand into his. “I’ve never been more ready.”
###
More by Angie Martin
False Security
Rachel Thomas longs for norm
alcy, but if she stops running, she could die…or worse. Chased by a past that wishes to imprison her, haunted by dreams that seek to destroy her, Rachel finds solace in a love she could not predict. A love she cannot deter.
Mark Jacobson is the man who never needed love. He has his bookstore, his bachelorhood, and his freedom. In the moment he meets Rachel, he is swept into a world he didn’t know existed. One filled with the purest of love. One filled with betrayal, lies, and murder.
Now Rachel and Mark are forced to face her past. The truth may kill them both.
Reader Reviews for False Security
“I HIGHLY recommend this book if you like suspense and surprises. Martin is a master at her craft and I cannot WAIT to read her next novel!” ~ 5-star review from Goodreads
“Ms. Martin had me rooting for Rachel and Mark… As danger escalated, I found it impossible to stop reading. A riveting story: if you enjoy romantic thrillers, you’re in for a treat with ‘False Security’.” ~ 5-star review from Amazon
“False Security by Angie Martin is the kind of book I just couldn’t stop reading. It’s a new haunting love story…and this author knows how to get me hooked into a tale from the first page. There are…moments of beauty, quiet moments of love, and seething times of terror…False Security is a beautiful love story that you will not want to miss.” ~5-star review from Amazon
“Excellent read for lovers of suspense thrillers.” ~ 5-star review from Amazon
“…an emotionally gripping thriller.” ~ The Wichita Eagle (review of 2004 release)
About Angie Martin
Angie Martin lives with her husband and pets in a California mountain community. She grew up in Wichita, Kansas and has lived all over the United States. Her work reflects her background and schooling in criminal justice. She is also the author of the suspense novel, False Security. Angie is hard at work on her next Emily Monroe novel.