Chapter Seven
The snow melted all at once, overnight while Nora slept. The next morning, she awoke to birds chirping and trees that had sprouted green leaves. It was summer again. How did the muses do that?
Nora was glad of it. She loved the weather, loved scampering around barefoot again. Everyone, even Maddie, agreed it was about time for the snow to go away. Though Nora and her friends had decided to launch an investigation into who was opening the portals, it was hard to stay focused. There were so many things in Helicon that Nora wanted to try and experience. It was in the back of her mind, but when neither Sawyer nor Maddie brought it up again, Nora didn’t either. Nora spent the next few weeks almost exclusively in the visual art enclave, partly on the encouragement of Theia, who had been so complimentary about her snow sculpture.
The visual art enclave was west of the main fire pit. It was a funky, comfortably unorganized sort of place. Unlike the tweens and rebels enclave or the architecture enclave, it had no archway leading inside. Instead, tents were simply clustered somewhat haphazardly together. The first clue that she was getting close to the visual art enclave was usually the smell of mineral spirits and the sight of paintings lying out on the grass to dry. In the center of the enclave, there was a small fire pit, just like in the other enclaves, but this one was surrounded by a metal cage depicting men and women dancing naked amongst flames. Instead of being surrounded by logs for sitting, the visual art enclave had mismatched chairs made of bright colors and varied materials. There were usually muses gathered around the fire pit sketching or sculpting.
But some of the enclave was pretty organized. For instance, there were tents devoted to different disciplines of art. One jam packed full of every color of oil paint Nora could imagine, with rows and rows of paintbrushes ranging from small and detailed to large and coarse. One where muses mixed clay. One with pencils and paper, one with charcoals and watercolors, one in which the muses stretched canvases over wooden frames. There were potter’s wheels scattered around in the grass, furnaces for baking ceramics, even hot fires for glass blowing. Nora didn’t think she’d get around to trying it all if she had a lifetime, and she did. More accurately, she had several lifetimes, since she could halt her aging whenever she wanted.
Her days began to settle into a comfortable rhythm. She awoke, ate breakfast with Maddie and Sawyer, wandered off to the visual art enclave and played all day, making whatever came to her fancy, and then spent the evening with Owen, walking in the woods and plains that surrounded Helicon. They held hands and kissed under trees and by babbling brooks. Owen was settling in with the muse police quite well, and he also spent time helping out the engineering enclave from time to time. Things were always breaking in Helicon, and the muses leaned on engineering quite a bit. Engineering were the fixers. The muse police the protectors. And Nora thought those two roles suited Owen quite well. He had always protected her. And he was always trying to fix their problem. Owen might not be as creative as a muse, but he was powerful and innovative. She was glad that people were recognizing that he was an asset to Helicon, and that he felt as if he was important.
Before she knew it, it was February, and the visual art enclave suddenly was bursting with people working on Valentines. Making Valentines was apparently a hallowed tradition in Helicon. The muses sent a huge inspiration thread to the mundane world for Valentine’s Day, encouraging humans to be creative in the ways they showed their love. To deal with the influx of people into the enclave who weren’t regulars, a new tent was set up.
The tent was full of materials from Valentines, from the kind of thing that Nora recognized from elementary school, like construction paper and glue, to more sophisticated materials. Scraps of pink and red fabric. Lace. Cardboard. Paints of various consistencies and ingredients. Nora loved it. Theia noticed she was spending time helping out in the Valentine tent, and somehow roped Nora into overseeing it half of the time. It suited Nora fine, because she was spending most of her time there working on an epic Valentine for Owen, and she didn’t have any problem helping other muses hunt down materials they were looking for or giving them advice on what kind of techniques they could use to achieve the effects they wanted. But it did mean that she was spending more time in the visual art enclave than she had been in the past.
For several days in a row, she didn’t even bother to go to the main fire pit for the drum circle and dinner meal. There was food in the visual art enclave, so she munched on that. Then she went back to work on her Valentines. She felt consumed by it. When she did make it back to her tent, after the sun had gone down, she felt guilty for abandoning Catling, who would snuggle up to her and mew plaintively. She’d feed the cat, try to stay awake playing with her, but end up falling asleep, exhausted.
This went on for the week leading up to Valentine’s Day. On the actual day, she arrived at the visual arts enclave very early, because she had a few things she wanted to finish up on Owen’s Valentine. She’d already finished the others she wanted to give out. One for Maddie, one for Sawyer, and also one for Phoebe. She didn’t feel like she knew anyone else well enough to know if she was supposed to make Valentines for them. And indeed, if she understood the muses she talked to in the visual arts enclave, Valentine’s Day shaped up to a pretty private holiday in Helicon, much the way it did everywhere else. There was no large community gathering. Instead, people paired off, shared food and drink, and generally hunkered down for the night. That was fine with Nora.
By the time midmorning swung around, Nora had finished Owen’s Valentine. It was very pretty and detailed, incorporating bits of lace, beads, parchment, squiggles of paint, and glitter. She was pretty proud of it. And she thought Owen would appreciate the fact that she’d made it a map of their lives, beginning separately (in the round parts of the heart), then coming together in the mundane world and traveling to Helicon together.
As she was giving it a final once-over, Theia came into the tent. She surveyed Nora’s work on the Valentine. “Gorgeous. As usual.”
Nora beamed. “I think Owen will like it. And I think I’m finally finished.”
“Oh, great,” said Theia. “Then you can help the muses who are making Valentines for people who aren’t visually inclined.” All the muses wanted to give Valentines, but not all of them made them themselves. There had been a huge group of them in and out of the enclave creating them, but still others would come by later to pick up premade ones. The visual art muses joked that the philosophy enclave was especially picky.
That sounded fun to Nora, so she stowed her own Valentines and started cutting heart shapes from construction paper. She worked until late afternoon with the other muses. That was when Alexander Night came into the tent. He looked a little uncomfortable. Everyone else was busy, but he caught Nora’s eye first. “Um, I wanted to get a Valentine,” he said, shoving his hands in his pockets.
Nora led him over to the area where they were keeping the Valentines they’d made for people to pick up. Honestly, she hadn’t given Alexander Night much thought in the past month or so, but seeing him now reminded her of the previous suspicions she and the others had about him. “These are the ones you can pick from,” she said.
Alexander laughed nervously. “I’m really not good at this. I want something special for my wife, though. Something pretty.”
Nora thought all the Valentines were pretty, but she tried to scrutinize them looking for the prettiest ones. She fished out one with a scalloped ribbon around the edge. “Maybe something like this?”
Alexander considered. “I don’t know. It’s awfully, um, fancy, isn’t it? Maybe something a little simpler. Sort of simple elegance. We’re simple people.”
Nora decided to seize this turn of conversation to try to wring some information from Alexander. “I guess maybe that makes it tough, living here in Helicon with a bunch of people who aren’t particularly, um, simple?” Geez, she was going to offend him, wasn’t she?
But Alexander didn’t seem the least bit r
uffled. “Not at all. I wouldn’t have it any other way.” He cocked his head. “You know, I suppose I could be somewhere else, doing something similar to what I do now. But I feel like it’s important to protect Helicon. This place is vital to the world, to everything. If people aren’t inspired, there’s no reason to be alive. Maybe I don’t have the ability to inspire others, but I have the ability to protect inspiration. That means a lot to me.”
Nora studied his face. He sure seemed sincere. Maybe they were barking up the complete wrong tree with Alexander. If he loved Helicon so much, why would he be tearing holes in it? She looked back at the Valentines. She pulled out a plain red one with tiny lace hearts clustered in one corner. “Simpler?”
“Too simple,” said Alexander. He took his hands from his pockets and began to sift through them himself, picking them up, studying them, and then discarding them.
“Helicon is a pretty wonderful place,” said Nora. “It makes it hard for me to believe that anyone would want to harm it. Those holes in Helicon seem even more strange.”
Alexander grunted, still looking through the Valentines. “I know Owen is convinced that hole we closed was made from inside. He might be right.” He looked at Nora. “I don’t want to believe that, though, for the exact reason you said. Who could be living here among us who doesn’t love this place? Who could hate it so much? I can’t even fathom it.”
“Me either,” said Nora. He was sounding less and less likely to be the guy who actually did it. Was he simply playing her, telling her what he thought she wanted to hear so that she wouldn’t suspect him? She couldn’t be sure.
“We are working on it, though,” said Alexander. “Don’t worry about that. The security enclave is going to figure out why it happened, and we’re going to stop it from happening again.” He held the Valentine in his hand out at arm’s length, nodding. “This one.” He showed it to her.
It was a heart covered with dark maroon fabric. There was a black ribbon stretching diagonally along the heart. It was simple and elegant. Maybe Alexander wasn’t creative, but he had good taste. “Nice choice,” said Nora.
“Thanks for your help,” he said.
After Alexander, it seemed there was a rush of muses coming in who needed help deciding on Valentines. And the others had been right. The philosophy enclave was notorious for not being able to make decisions. Themis Branch spent at least two hours poring over the Valentines before he finally settled on one.
It was already dark by the time Nora managed to get away. She went by the main fire pit to see if Owen was around. But Owen was nowhere to be found. She didn’t linger long at the main fire pit. She was too excited to find him.
She went back to his tent, but he wasn’t there either. Wondering if perhaps he was waiting for her at her own tent, she headed back to the tweens and rebels enclave. Catling was there, and Nora stopped to pet her for a little bit, and to give her some scraps she’d picked up earlier, but Owen wasn’t around.
If he wasn’t at the security enclave, the main fire pit, or here, Nora thought maybe he’d gone for a walk. He liked to do that. She thought it was a little odd for him to have run off by himself on Valentine’s Day of all days, but Owen was not always easy to understand.
Since she couldn’t find Owen, she went to Maddie’s tent to give her the Valentine she’d made for her. Sawyer was in there too, so she was able to give both of them their Valentines. They had Valentines for her too. She remembered seeing them at the visual art enclave earlier in the week, but she hadn’t had a chance to look at what they were making.
“What gives?” said Maddie, after she’d given Nora a hug for the Valentine. “I thought you’d be with Owen.”
“You usually spend the evenings with him anyway,” said Sawyer.
“I can’t find him,” said Nora.
“Well, did you guys plan where to meet?” asked Maddie.
Nora shook her head. “I’ve kind of been busy this week. I guess I haven’t really seen him in a few days.” She’d been consumed with creation. She hadn’t given much thought to Owen. And Owen was already feeling left out of her life since she was a muse and he wasn’t. Oops. She hoped he was okay. “You know what would improve Helicon? Cell phones.”
Sawyer made a face. “Sounds awful, actually. Can you imagine being interrupted in the middle of making something by a stupid phone? I don’t think it would encourage creativity.”
“I’m sure you’ll find him,” said Maddie. “But there’s no meal at the main fire pit tonight, and my mother has been making little basket dinners for two all day. She said we should stop by and get one, so Sawyer and I were going to go now. You can pick up one for Owen, if you want.”
That sounded like as good a plan as any. Nora headed down to the food enclave with the both of them. The big dining hall was littered with baskets, and everything smelled divine. Maddie picked up the first basket she saw. It was covered with a red and black checked blanket and had a huge bow wrapped around the handle. She tried to dart away, but a plump woman with eyes like Maddie’s saw her.
“Maddie, wait!” The woman bustled over and wrapped her arms around Maddie.
“Hi, Mom,” said Maddie, resignation in her voice.
“Happy Valentine’s Day!” said Maddie’s mom. She grinned a jolly smile, and Nora loved her immediately. She was like Maddie, only without Maddie’s insecurities. Maddie’s mom looked to Sawyer and Nora. “Aren’t you going to introduce me to your friends?”
Maddie sighed. “This is Nora. And this is Sawyer.”
Maddie’s mother shook both their hands in turn. “I’m Doreen.”
“Nice to meet you,” said Nora.
“We really could have used you around the food enclave this week, Maddie,” said Doreen. “We were so busy. And honestly, I don’t see how you’re going to be a cook if you don’t ever come here to cook.”
Maddie rolled her eyes. “Mom, I don’t really want to cook.”
“Oh, of course you do. You’re young is all. Salts always cook. What else are you going to do with a last name like Salt, eh?” She chuckled.
Nora smiled too.
“So what did you spent the week doing, then?” asked Doreen.
Maddie shrugged. “I made Valentines. Oh, I have one for you.” She got it out and handed it to her mother.
“Thank you, Maddie,” said Doreen. “It’s beautiful. But this didn’t take you all week, did it?”
“I’ve told you before, Mom,” said Maddie. “I was in the dance enclave.”
“Still?” said Doreen. “Maddie, you’re a wonderful girl, but you simply aren’t meant to be a dancer.” She pinched her daughter’s midsection. “You’ve got a little too much padding if you know what I mean.” She chuckled again.
But this time Nora didn’t smile. “Maddie’s actually very good.”
Maddie shot her a grateful look. “Well, Mom, if that’s all, we’ll just be off.”
“Oh, one more thing,” said Doreen. “They were looking for a few volunteers to watch the kiddie playground tonight, since most of the people usually there have dates. You and Sawyer aren’t planning on having a romantic evening together, right?”
Sawyer and Maddie exchanged a glance. “Mom,” said Maddie. “Sawyer’s gay.”
“Well, I thought so,” said Doreen, “but I wasn’t sure. Anyway, it won’t be a problem for you two to watch the kids, then? Because I already said you would.”
Maddie groaned. “Mom, you should have asked—”
“Oh, don’t be silly,” said Doreen. “They’re expecting you, so scurry over there right away, why don’t you?”
Sawyer smiled. “Hey, it could be cool. It’s fun trying to squeeze into the castle, even if we are too big.”
“That’s the spirit,” said Doreen. She smiled at Nora. “And of course, you’ll be wanting something special for your sweetheart, won’t you?”
If I can find him, thought Nora. But she just nodded.
“I have just the thing,” said Dor
een. She picked up a basket with flowers tucked into the red blanket covering it. “It’s pasta. Italian food is so romantic, don’t you think?”
Nora was smiling again. “Thank you.” She took the basket.
“And of course, if Maddie ever has someone special, I’ll be sure to give extra care to a basket like this for her,” said Doreen. She winked at her daughter. “You know boys in the food enclave tend to prefer women with a little heft to them, don’t you?”
“Goodnight, Mom,” said Maddie, through gritted teeth.
As they walked away with their baskets, Maddie seethed. Once they were out of earshot, Maddie exploded. “She can’t keep her mouth shut, can she? Nothing I do is good enough for her.”
“She shouldn’t have said that stuff about your weight,” Nora agreed. “But I think she means well. She cares about you. She’s your mom.”
“She’s horrible,” said Maddie. “I want to be as far away from her as I can be.”
“She’s not that bad,” said Sawyer.
“Neither of you understand,” said Maddie.
Sawyer pointed. “We’ve got to go that way if we’re babysitting the kids tonight.”
“I can’t believe she did that!” said Maddie. But she turned in the direction that Sawyer was pointing.
Nora stopped. “I’d better go back to my tent. I guess Owen will find me there eventually.”
“Right,” said Maddie. “You’re so lucky to have a boyfriend. I guess if I ever stop being fat, some guy will actually look at me.”
“Maddie,” said Nora.
“You’re not fat,” said Sawyer. This was becoming a bit of a chorus between the two of them. Sawyer sighed. “Look, I don’t have a boyfriend either. Maybe if I stopped wearing skirts.”
“And I really have no idea where my boyfriend is,” said Nora.
“He’ll find you,” said Maddie. “He’s completely, like, obsessed with you.”
“You got that right,” muttered Sawyer.
There it was again. Sawyer was always muttering things about Owen. Nora tightened her grip on her basket and waved to her friends. “I’ll see you guys later.” She started off for the tweens and rebels enclave. The longer she walked, the heavier the basket of food seemed to get. She shifted it to her hip, wrapping her arms around the bottom of it. Pleasant warmth emanated out of the bottom. Finally, she crossed underneath the archway into the enclave. No one seemed to be there. She could see that a few of the tents were lit up on the inside, probably from tweens who were sharing their dinners together. No one was in the tree house. Nora set down her basket in front of her tent. Should she really wait here? Where could Owen be?
Maybe she should just go inside her tent and curl up with Catling. If Owen showed up sometime soon, great. If not, she’d eat without him.
“Nora.” Owen emerged from the shadows of the trees. His jaw twitched.
“There you are,” said Nora. “I’ve been looking all over. I got us a basket of food—”
“Leave it.” Owen’s fingers tightened around her arm, and he yanked her away from her tent.
“But it’ll get cold,” said Nora. “It’s probably really good. Maddie’s mother—”
“Maddie,” said Owen. “I guess that’s where you’ve been all week. With Maddie?”
“No, I was making Valentines,” said Nora. She should have recognized the signs, she realized. Owen was angry. She didn’t like it when Owen got angry. Admittedly, he almost never got angry with her. But when he was mad, he could be unpredictable. She gulped. “I guess I’ve been a little busy. But I’ve been working on your Valentine.”
Owen tugged at her. “Let’s walk.”
Nora didn’t say anything. She let him lead her away from the enclave, into the woods. They walked through the trees, Owen’s fingers digging deep into the fleshy part of her arm. It hurt, but she didn’t say anything. Neither of them said anything. They walked. If she hadn’t been sure Owen was angry with her, she might have thought the bright moon peering through the shadowy leaves was pretty.
They walked through the woods until they came out on the other side in the same big field where Sawyer had been grazed by the Influence. And they kept walking. At one point Nora tried to ask Owen where they were going, but he only laughed a little and said it was a surprise. Except he didn’t sound happy about the surprise. He sounded sardonic and cold.
Eventually, after they’d walked a very long time, Nora could see that they soon wouldn’t be able to walk any further. Ahead of them, the ground turned rocky and abruptly dropped off as if they’d come to a cliff. The edge of Helicon. Sawyer had told her about it. Owen marched Nora right up to it, and they both stared down over the edge. There was nothing there. A swirling abyss of clouds and stars. Nora felt dizzy.
Owen eased his hand off Nora’s arm. She rubbed it. It still hurt a little. He moved behind her, snaking his arms around her waist. He put his lips against her neck, and his voice was silken. “What do you think would happen if you fell off the edge, Nora?”
At first she wasn’t sure she’d heard him right. “What?”
“Oh, don’t worry,” he breathed. “I’ve got you. But if I let go. If I pushed you, what do you think would happen?”
Nora felt cold all over. What was this, some kind of sick joke? “Owen?”
He pulled her tight against him, rubbing the outside of her thigh with one hand. “Answer the question, Nora.”
“I...”
His hand slid around, his fingers brushing the inside of her thigh, the more sensitive part. Little thrills went through her body. Her heart beat fast. “What would happen if you fell off the edge?”
“I’d die.” Her voice was hardly a whisper. Why was Owen saying this?
“You’re right,” he said. “I think you would.” He spun her around so that she faced him.
Now she couldn’t see the gaping chasm behind her. “Owen, let go of me.” There was fear in her voice.
“I’ve got you,” he said, his blue eyes twinkling. “Don’t you trust me?”
What was the right answer here? “Of course, I do.”
“Do you?” he said. And then, abruptly, he did let go of her, and she was so startled that she lost her footing for a second, hurtling backward, her arms flailing. Owen grabbed her hands and pulled her away from the edge. She sprawled in a heap a few feet from the edge, her breath coming in gasps. “See, I don’t trust you, Nora.”
Why was Owen doing this? What was going on? It was Valentine’s Day. Nora felt like crying.
“How can I trust you,” said Owen, and his voice was getting louder, “when you’re never around?”
So this was what this was about. Nora thought she understood now. Hadn’t she thought earlier that Owen might have been upset about the fact that she’d been away most of the week? “I’m sorry. I got so into creating things at the visual arts enclave. I guess I should have thought about how that would make you feel, but I was just enjoying myself so much. I made you a really awesome Valentine. I have it back at the tent. Why don’t we go back, and I’ll give it to you, and maybe the food isn’t cold and—”
“Stop talking,” said Owen. “Do you know what it’s like for me when I don’t have you, Nora? It’s like falling off the edge of this cliff. It’s like dying. You have no idea how much it hurts. Being without you is like being ripped apart.”
“I’m sorry,” Nora said softly. She hadn’t meant to hurt Owen.
“You’re sorry now,” said Owen, “but for the past few days, I haven’t even seen you. And you weren’t sorry then. If you don’t see me, you don’t even think about me.”
“That’s not true,” said Nora. “I spent all week thinking about you. I was making you a Valentine.”
“What do I want with a piece of stupid heart-shaped paper if you’re ignoring me all the time?”
“I...” Maybe he had a point. “I’m sorry, Owen. I won’t do it again. I promise I’ll make time for you. For us.” Would he calm down if she said tha
t?
But Owen was getting enraged now. His face twitched. “Make time? Make time?” He raked his fingers through his hair. “Don’t do me any favors. If I’m such an inconvenience to your perfect, fun life, I don’t want to bother you anymore.”
“That’s not what I meant,” said Nora. “I didn’t mean to hurt you, I just didn’t think—”
“You don’t think very often, do you?” said Owen, sneering. “You’ve never been one to really spend time thinking about stuff. You didn’t try to figure out how to get us back to Helicon, did you? I did that. And now that we’re here, you aren’t even grateful. I don’t mean anything to you.”
“That’s not true. You mean everything to me.”
“Do I?” said Owen. “Because you have a funny way of showing it.”
Nora wasn’t sure what to say. He had an answer for everything. No matter what she said, it was wrong. She hugged herself. She hated the idea that she was hurting him so much. Sometimes, he seemed so strong and capable, and she forgot that deep down, he was vulnerable. She should have thought about him more this week. Why hadn’t she thought about how Owen would feel if she wasn’t spending time with him? She guessed she could understand why he was so upset. He must feel abandoned. And what had he said to her before? That she was the only person who’d never abandoned him? She felt horrible. “I’m so sorry.”
Owen was still standing up, and she was huddled at his feet. He glared down at her, his blue eyes smoldering. He twitched, and she flinched.
The flinch seemed to catch him off guard. His expression changed, went from one of rage to one of worry, and it was as if all the tension fell out of him at once. His shoulders slumped. “Fuck,” he whispered. “What am I doing?”
Nora held her breath. Was he better now? Was the anger gone?
He knelt down next to her. “You look scared of me.” He buried his face in his hands. “I think I’m losing my mind.”
Nora tentatively put her hand on Owen’s back. She didn’t want to set him off again.
He looked up at her. “I’m so sorry. I don’t...” He ran his hands through his hair. “I get so angry. I feel like I can’t control it. It scares me.”
Nora had seen Owen get angry before. She’d seen him freak out on people like Laura. But he’d never done it to her. “You get angry with me?”
“I don’t mean it.” He looked so pitiful suddenly. “I can’t believe I dragged you out here like this, that I said those things to you. You’re so important to me, Nora. But I just can’t think.” He turned away from her again, swallowing hard. “I’m not like everyone else. I have these powers and abilities, and I don’t understand them. Sometimes I feel like they take me over, and I don’t know how to stop it. I don’t want to be like that, though. I don’t want to be angry and scary. Do you believe me?”
She did. Of course she did. But she still felt frightened.
“It’s better when you’re around,” said Owen. “You make everything clearer. You were gone all week, and I started to lose it.” He grabbed her hand, and the look he gave her was so earnest it made her chest hurt. “But you’re here now, and I’m okay again. As long as you stay with me... You will, won’t you? You won’t leave me alone again?”
She shook her head. “No, Owen. If I help you, if I make it better, then we’ll be sure to spend time together. I won’t leave you alone again. I promise.”
He gripped her hand tighter. “Thank you,” he whispered. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”