The first terror was over. She could feel the tears flowing down her cheeks. He was safe. Thank God.
The ship rode out the storm two hours later.
“Will you get down now?” Jared asked, pronouncing each word distinctly as the last thunder rolled into the distance.
“I don’t know if I can,” she said wearily. Every muscle was stiff and sore with the tension of the last hours.
Jared went around Kapu and lifted her off the stallion.
She held on to the horse’s mane while she steadied herself. “Thank you,” she whispered.
“You’re a madwoman.” His eyes were blazing down at her. “I’ll be surprised if you live to be twenty. You should never have gotten on him.”
“But then we wouldn’t have been able to blindfold him.” She patted Kapu before burying her face in his mane. “You’re a great deal of trouble, boy.”
“Not nearly as much as his mistress.”
She ignored the pang the jab brought. “How did you know a blindfold would help?”
“When I was a boy, I had a horse who was terrified of storms,” he said as he pushed her away from the horse. “He’s worked up a sweat. Sit while I rub him down.”
“I can do it.”
He glanced at her ruin of a gray gown. “I wouldn’t think of having you become more bedraggled. We’ve already discussed how enchanting I find that garment.”
She didn’t argue. She wasn’t sure she had the strength to move. She dropped down on the hay and leaned back against the wall of the stall.
He took up a cloth and began to wipe Kapu’s coat. “No reply?”
She roused herself to respond, “Why should I? I don’t care what you think of my gowns, Your Grace, and Lani says it should bring me great satisfaction to use an enemy as a stable boy.”
“Lani is a wise woman. But don’t you think you should address me by my given name, considering the humble status you’ve given me?”
“Perhaps.” She watched him move around the horse, his movements swift, precise, yet gentle. He was all lean, compact muscle and athletic grace. He might be performing a stable boy’s duty, but there was no servility about him; barefoot, dark hair wild, he looked more the arrogant warrior caring for his battle steed. His shirt was totally open now, and she could see the triangle of dark hair that thatched his gleaming chest. She had touched that chest, felt the washboard muscles of his belly that had tightened beneath her hands and—
“Why are you staring at me?”
Her gaze flew up to his face and saw that his eyes were narrowed on her.
She glanced hurriedly downward, trying desperately to think of something to say. “Your feet are bare.”
“I was in a hurry to get to you,” he said slowly. “I regret if it offends you.”
“No, it was good of you to—I didn’t mean—” She was stuttering like an idiot, she realized with annoyance. “Why would it offend me? I often go barefoot.”
“And your feet aren’t the only portions of your body you bare,” he said with a distinct edge to his voice. “Though no one would guess it by looking at you in that shroud.”
She kept her gaze fixed on his feet. “You won’t have to look at me in it after tonight. It’s beyond repair.”
“Good.”
Silence fell between them. The only sounds were the soft swish of the cloth on Kapu’s back and the distant whisper of thunder.
“That should do it.” He tossed the cloth aside and gave Kapu a final pat. The stallion whickered and pressed his face against Jared’s bare chest. He laughed and pushed the horse away before he turned to face her. “Anything else?”
“What?”
His eyes were glittering recklessly, and she stiffened as he moved toward her.
“Are there any other services you require?” He dropped to his knees in front of her. “Lani said you should make use of me. Don’t you always do as Lani says?”
“Most of the time.” She moistened her lips. “She’s usually right.”
“Is she? Then use the enemy,” he urged softly. He took her hand, his thumb stroking the inside of her wrist. “As I intend to do.”
She felt as if every stroke were sending little tingling ripples up her arm. Her throat tightened and she could scarcely breathe. He was so close she could smell the clean scent of him, feel the heat his body emitted.
“Let me go,” she whispered.
“I’m not holding you.” He smiled. “Not really. Not the way I want to hold you. Just this tiny touch on your wrist.” His thumb leisurely moved up to her forearm. “And here …”
It was not true. He was holding her. She felt as if she were chained in place. The tingling was spreading to her shoulders and her breasts, and a strange languid heat was flowing through her.
He lifted her wrist until she could feel his breath on her skin with every low word. “You’ve seen what a good stable boy I am. Kapu enjoyed my wiping him down. Would you like me to do it to you?”
Her eyes widened in shock.
“First, I’d rid you of that nun’s gown.” He blew softly on the veins of her wrist. “Then I’d lay you on it so that the hay wouldn’t mark your skin. You have such soft skin.…”
She was shaking as if she had the fever. “No …”
“Would you rather feel the roughness?” His tongue gently touched her wrist. “Whatever you want. I’ll give you whatever you want. Just give me what I want in return.”
“You can’t give me anything. It’s not—” She broke off as a long shudder went through her. He was licking delicately, sensuously, at her wrist as if she were some rare, exotic tidbit.
I’d like to lick the salt from your breasts.
The memory of his words pounded through her mind as she felt his warm tongue on her skin. What was the matter with her? Why couldn’t she move? It was as if he were weaving some magic spell about her. Kahuna. Beautiful, seductive Kahuna …
“Rough or gentle. You tell me.” Dark plum color flushed his cheeks and his voice was thick. “Let me open your thighs and put my hands on you, in you. I’ll make you feel things you’ve never known before. You’ll like my touch as much as Kapu did. I promise you, Cassie. Just let me—”
“No.” She meant the word to be firm, but it came out a weak, mere breath of sound. She was not weak, she told herself frantically. She could break this spell. She jerked her arm away and scooted back from him. “How could you think I would do that?” she asked unevenly. “I don’t want any of this.”
He reached out as if he would touch her again, and then his hand dropped. “Do you think I do?” His voice was suddenly harsh. “But it’s here. It’s real.” He paused and tried to temper his tone. “So compromises must be made. I’ve grown used to compromises over the years. We can’t always have what we want. You must have discovered that, living with your father and sweet Clara Kidman.”
And he had lived a life of privilege and self-indulgence. What wealth had not provided he would have won by that seductive charm. “I don’t think you’ve ever made a compromise,” she told him.
“Then you’d be wrong.” He smiled cynically. “I made one two minutes ago when I didn’t throw you down in the straw and have my wicked way with you.”
She inhaled sharply.
“Don’t look like that. I don’t want to force you. But, dammit, I’m not accustomed to celibacy, and I’m not going to be able to keep myself from—” He rose to his feet, his entire body charged with leashed frustration. “So you’d better learn to make a few compromises yourself. You were very close to letting me have you tonight. If you won’t admit it to me, at least be honest with yourself.”
“I won’t—” Her voice was agonized. “I can’t.”
“Come to terms with it. Before this voyage is over, you’re going to be in my bed. And you’re going to want to be there. I don’t care how you justify it to yourself. It’s going to happen.” He stopped and drew a long breath. “Think about it.” He strode toward the steps. “God knows I will!
”
The door slammed behind him.
She crossed her arms over her chest to help still their trembling. He was wrong. She had not been near surrendering to that powerful sensual force. True, she had been dazzled, held captive for a moment, but only because she was weary and strained and—
If you won’t admit it to me, at least be honest with yourself.
You’ve been robbed of time. You must think clearly.
Use me. I intend to use you.
It’s going to happen.
Lani’s words. Jared’s words. Both were whirling, mingling in her mind like the winds of the storm.
She leaned her head back against the wall and closed her eyes. What had happened tonight had torn aside the protective veil she had drawn around her, and she felt naked … and hurting.
Think about it.
Good God, how could she do anything else?
Lani was walking on deck when Cassie left the cargo hold the next morning. She made a face as she caught sight of Cassie. “You look terrible. Didn’t you sleep at all?”
“A little. It was a terrible storm.”
Lani nodded. “I slept little myself. I’ve no faith in that drunken sot as a captain.” She added grudgingly, “Though he appeared to display a surprising control of the vessel last night.” She dismissed the subject of Bradford as her gaze raked Cassie. “Well, that gown is certainly a disaster.” She suddenly chuckled. “Which is one good occurrence in a bad night.” When Cassie didn’t agree at once, her smile faded. “What’s wrong? Was Kapu hurt?”
Cassie smiled with an effort. “He’s fine.”
“I was about to go to you when the thunder started, but I saw our kindly host on his way to the hold, and I knew he’d be more help than I.”
“He was a great help.”
Lani frowned. “Then why do you look as if you’re—” She stopped as Cassie looked away from her. “Talk to me, Cassie.”
“There’s nothing to say.” She quickened her pace. “I only need to bathe and then go to my bed.”
And come to terms with the frightening decision she had made after those long hours of searching her mind and emotions. She didn’t want to be with anyone right now, not even Lani. She felt as finely balanced as a tightrope walker who would topple at a whisper. “I’ll see you after I wake, Lani.”
She was aware of Lani’s puzzled gaze on her back as she hurried away.
“You look superb tonight.” Jared bowed over Lani’s hand before glancing around the dining hall with assumed casualness. “And will your friend be joining us for supper?”
“I think not.” Lani gave him a dazzling smile. “As you know, she had a bad night with Kapu and is very weary. She prefers to eat in her cabin.”
“I’ve not seen her all day,” Bradford commented as he seated Lani. “Is she well?”
“Oh, Cassie is never sick.”
“Except when she falls down mountains or tries to drown herself riding half-mad stallions,” Jared said dryly.
“She never did any of those things before you came to our island,” Lani said with great gentleness. She turned to Bradford. “I do hope you’ve chosen the wine tonight. You have such a depth of experience to draw on.”
It seemed Lani was not all sweetness tonight, Jared thought as he watched her during supper. She was still glowing, still entertaining, but there had been a subtle shift of mood as demonstrated by those first velvet sheathed barbs.
Yet the smile she gave him at the end of the meal was as warm as sunlight. “Will you walk with me to my cabin? I would have words with you.”
“We’ll both go with you,” Bradford said, pushing back his chair.
“No.” She didn’t look at him as she rose to her feet. “Stay and enjoy your brandy. It clearly means so much to you.”
Bradford flinched. “Dismissed.” He reached for the bottle. “Well, why not?”
Jared followed her from the cabin.
She looked up at the sky and drew a deep breath. “It’s lovely, isn’t it? It reminds me of the nights when I was a young girl, racing down the beach with my friends.”
“Yes, lovely,” he said absently. The night sky was clear, with no hint of last night’s storm, and the motion of the sea as calm as the rocking of a baby’s cradle. The stallion should be no problem tonight. Was Cassie down in the hold with Kapu now? Probably. She hadn’t been there when he had gone to check on the horse earlier in the evening, but she couldn’t stay away from the damned stallion.
Lani suddenly turned to him and asked bluntly, “What did you do to her last night?”
He went still. “I beg your pardon?”
“When Cassie came back to her cabin this morning, she was”—Lani hesitated—“different. Quiet. I don’t know.” She shook her head in frustration. “She wouldn’t talk to me. She was not herself.” She met his gaze. “I didn’t like it. Cassie is my little sister. She thinks she’s a woman, but she’s still half child. I won’t have her hurt.”
He looked at her in astonishment. “Am I to assume you’re asking my intentions?”
“No, I know your intentions. They are the same as all men. I’m merely telling you that on no account will I permit you to force her.”
He stiffened. “I’m not in the habit of forcing women.”
“I didn’t think you were, but Cassie was very …” She trailed off and then said, “This is too perplexing. I had intentions of— I don’t like being uncertain about things.”
“You’re not alone. I’ve not the slightest idea what you’re talking about.”
“You would have had a very clear idea by now if Cassie were not—” She broke off again, and her pace quickened the last few yards to her cabin. “Perhaps tomorrow …” The door of the cabin slammed behind her.
Jared stared at the door for an instant before he whirled on his heel and strode back toward his cabin. What in Hades was that all about? Lani was not a woman to be unsure about anything, but her conduct tonight had been hesitant in the extreme. Well, he had no patience with delving into another woman’s vagaries when he had Cassie’s tormenting him.
His pace slowed before he reached his cabin, his gaze on the door leading to the cargo hold. Should he go down and see her? Last night, he knew, she had been closer than she dreamed to surrender.
She was not herself.
I will not have her hurt.
Dammit, he had no intention of hurting her. He just wanted to— He would make sure she enjoyed it as much as he did. She wanted it. He was experienced enough to know when a woman was ready for him. It would not have been force.
Christ, why was he arguing with himself? He had spent a hellish night, tossing and turning, heavy and aching, after he had left her. Why not just go down and take what he wanted?
He took a half step forward and then stopped. It could be she wasn’t even with Kapu. Lani had said she was weary. Perhaps it had not been the excuse he had thought it. The trials she had undergone during the past few days would have been wearing on anyone.
Softness again, he realized impatiently. The chit had him hesitating and caviling like a boy with his first mistress.
He turned back to his cabin. It would do no harm to let another day pass before he resumed the hunt. That wasn’t quite true, he corrected himself ruefully as he threw open the door. He would no doubt spend another tormented night and would soon be cursing his decision and the foolish impulse that—
“Good evening.” Cassie rose from the chair and faced him, a touch of bravado in her stance. “I thought you’d never come.”
His eyes widened as he stood frozen in the doorway. “Good God.”
She was barefoot, bare-breasted, and her hips were draped in the sarong she had worn the night he had met her. His gaze slowly moved over her, from flowing hair to pink-tipped breasts, and then lifted to her face. Her cheeks were burning with color, but her eyes met his with defiance.
“I’ve been waiting a long time,” she said.
The sheer lust that tore thr
ough him was so violent, it shocked him. It was immediately followed by fierce triumph. By God, she was his.
He stepped into the cabin and closed the door. “But it’s said all good things come to one who waits. I’ll try to see if I can’t reward you for your patience.”
She had not felt naked until he walked into the cabin. Her breasts swelled as his glance touched them, and her knees felt weak as she stood before him. But she was not weak; she must show him only strength, or she would be lost. She took a deep breath to ease the tightness in her chest. “I’m not patient. I hated waiting for you.”
“Well, I’m here now.” He paused, his gaze wandering down to the sarong. “Kanoa, I presume? I know I said I detested that gown, but I’m surprised you went to such lengths to please me.”
“I didn’t wear this to please you, I did it to please me. I feel more comfortable in it.” She lifted her chin. “What you want means nothing to me.”
“Then why are you here?”
She moistened her lips. “Why do you think? I’m not the first island woman to come to your cabin.”
“You’re certainly the most interesting.” He leaned back against the door and crossed his arms over his chest. “But I’d prefer you put it into words.”
She couldn’t say them. She had not thought it would be this difficult. She started across the cabin toward him. “To devil with words. You know why I’m here.”
“You’ve decided to let me have you?” he asked softly.
“No.” She stopped before him and stared directly into his eyes. “I’ve decided to use you.”
His smile faded, and she thought she saw a flicker of anger in his expression. “I see. I suppose I should have expected that response. May I ask in exactly what manner?”
Her gaze went to the bunk. “It seems very clear.”
“Nothing has ever been clear between us.”
She drew a deep breath, then said in a rush, “I’ve reached the time when my body needs a man. You will do as well as anyone.”
“Thank you,” he said caustically. “How flattering.”
She couldn’t help it if he was displeased. It was his own fault; he had asked for an explanation. “I’ve thought about what you said. For some reason I find you …” She hesitated, searching for words. “You draw me. I cannot understand it.”