Chapter 23
It was early evening when Gladrielle and I got back to the city. The sun was low in the west, turning the sky red, orange, and pink. Traffic was heavy but it was heading in the opposite direction. People had finished work and were heading home for the evening, back to the suburbs.
As I pulled into the parking lot next to the building that housed my condo, I noticed an unmarked Dodge Charger parked in front of my building. Stringbean was behind the wheel while Crystal sat in the passenger’s seat. I couldn’t see him, but I assumed Frat Boy was in the back.
“Time to glam up,” I said to Gladrielle.
“I see them,” Gladrielle said.
She used her elf magic to make herself appear human. Her blue hair appeared to become blond, her pointed ears appeared to become rounded, her flawless skin appeared to develop blemishes.
Once she was all set, we climbed out of the Del Sol, popped the trunk, and grabbed the two bags containing Gladrielle’s clothes. I closed the trunk lid to find Stringbean and Frat Boy standing there, with Crystal wedged between them, still wearing her expensive white linen pantsuit.
“Been somewhere?”Stringbean said to me.
“Took the elf home and picked up a new client.”
“The elf has left the city?”
“The dark elf has left the city,” I said. “Don’t expect her to return, ever.”
“She’s lying,” Crystal said.
“Because?” Stringbean said.
“Because she’s a mermaid.”
Frat Boy looked at Gladrielle. ‘Who’s your friend?”
“New client. Not that it concerns you. As you can see, she’s human, and since you’re part of the supernatural division . . . .” I let my voice trail off, thinking Frat Boy was bright enough to figure out the rest.
“You got a name?” Stringbean said, waving one of his bandaged hands at Gladrielle.
“Name’s Claire,” Gladrielle said.
“Mind if I ask what you’re doing with Low here?”
“I just had a run-in with my . . . family. Needed a place to stay. Low invited me to stay with her.”
“How did you meet the mermaid?” Crystal asked Gladrielle.
“You’re not a cop. Which means she doesn’t have to answer your questions. You want to get technical, she doesn’t have to answer any of your questions.” I glared at Stringbean. “You bring this creature to my home again and you and I are going to rumble. And that badge you carry in your pocket isn’t going to protect you. You got that?”
“You can’t threaten him,” Crystal said. “He’s an officer of the law. You should arrest her for saying that. If you need someone to testify that she threatened you, I’ll be more than happy to do it.”
Stringbean ignored Crystal and responded to my comment. “I didn’t ask for her, Walt assigned her to us. You know that.”
“I don’t care if Walt assigned her, or if God himself assigned her, you never bring her to my home. Ever.”
“We’re just looking for the dark elf,” Frat Boy said.
I glared at Frat Boy. “The dark elf is gone and she’s not coming back. You want to follow me around, that’s your business. Either way, you don’t bring this creature anywhere near my home.”
Was I upset. Hell, yes. If there was one person in this city that wanted to steal my treasure, if there was one person in this city that was stupid enough to steal my treasure, it was Crystal.
I had little doubt that while Stringbean and Frat Boy were sitting there looking for Gladrielle and myself, Crystal was casing the building, looking for the best way to break into my place and steal my treasure.
While I was glaring at Frat Boy, Crystal was using her snooty little nose to sniff Gladrielle.
“This one’s not human,” she said.
“What are you talking about?” Stringbean said.
“I know what humans smell like and this one isn’t human.”
“What is she?”
“I don’t know. I’m not familiar with her kind, whatever she is. I just know she’s not human.”
“Mind if I see some ID,” Stringbean said to Gladrielle.
Gladrielle patted the pockets on her tan shorts. “I don’t seem to have anything on me. I guess it’s because I left home in such a hurry.”
“And yet you had time to pack two bags,” Crystal said.
“I packed the bags,” I said, stepping between Crystal and Gladrielle. “While she waited in the car.”
“Like we can believe anything you say.”
I ignored Crystal and turned my attention to Stringbean. “The dark elf is gone and she’s not coming back. I’m asking you as a friend and colleague to trust what I tell you and walk away.”
Stringbean looked at me, then at Gladrielle, then he nodded. Once. “If Low says the dark elf is gone, then the dark elf is gone. Let’s head back to the station.”
He turned and headed for their car. Frat Boy hesitated a second, then fell in behind him. Crystal, however, remained rooted in place.
“You know what I think,” she said to me. “I think this is the elf that’s been causing trouble. I think she’s using glamor to hide her true appearance.”
“The dark elf is gone,” I repeated, “The only dark and evil thing around here is you. And since you’re not a cop, let alone human, I know for a fact that I can kill you without repercussions.”
Crystal hesitated for a second, probably checking to see if I was serious. She must have decided I was because she stuck a finger in my face. “This isn’t over. I’m coming back, with officers that aren’t afraid to do their duty. And we’re taking her into custody, and you along with her.”
She turned and stomped away, following Stringbean and Frat Boy back to the Dodge. I couldn’t help but wonder if there was anything worse than an evil siren working with the police, then decided there was one thing worse, an evil siren in charge of the police department. Fortunately, we hadn’t come to that, not yet anyway.
“Are we in trouble?” Gladrielle asked me.
“Depends.”
“On what?”
“How much pull Crystal has with Walt and the other higher ups.”
“Maybe I should just turn myself in.”
“No.”
“I did assault three police officers.”
“Which is why you can’t turn yourself in.”
Gladrielle wrinkled her brow. “I don’t understand.”
“Supernaturals don’t have the same rights as humans. They can lock you up for life, or even execute you. All without a trial.”
“I’m not a supernatural. I’m an elf. We’re an entirely different species. You know that.”
“I know that. You know that, but the humans won’t see it that way. They divide the world into two classes, humans and nonhumans, and you’re a nonhuman, just like me.”
“So what do we do?”
I forced a smile that I wasn’t feeling. Mostly because I knew that Crystal would be back, with reinforcements. “We take you upstairs, get you settled.”
Which is what we did. My condo was on the building’s third floor, its top floor. As you entered, the living room was to the right. The dining table was straight ahead, behind the dining table were a pair of sliding glass doors that led to a small balcony. To the right of the dining table was the kitchenette. Behind that was the bathroom.
Across the hall from the kitchenette and bathroom were a pair of bedrooms. I converted the first bedroom into a walk-in vault, complete with a steel door strong enough to withstand a merman pulling on it. Inside was where I kept my treasures, my shiny shiny treasures. The back bedroom was just that, a bedroom.
I didn’t use it all that much, not for sleeping anyway. Mermaids don’t sleep for extended periods like humans. We take catnaps, five minutes here, ten minutes there, never more than an hour at a time.
“The first bedroom has been converted into a vault,” I said. “So you can have have the back bedroom.”
“Where w
ill you sleep?” Gladrielle asked.
“I’m a mermaid, we don’t sleep for extended periods of time. We grab five minutes here, ten minutes there.”
We put Gladrielle’s bags in the bedroom, then I sat her down and gave her a quick primer on the Internet, showing her some of the ways that she could use it to find other disenfranchised elves. That’s what we were doing when the call came. It was Stringbean.
“Yeah,” I said.
“She’s coming back,” Stringbean said. “With Walt and a tactical unit.”
“Thanks for the heads up.”
“You did take a bullet for me.”
“Twice,” I said. “But who’s counting.”
Stringbean chuckled and hung up. I did the same, slipping the phone into the back pocket of my jeans.
“By she, I assume he meant the siren,” Gladrielle said.
She was sitting at my dining table, pecking away on my laptop, figuring out how to use the Internet, figuring out how to find other disenfranchised elves like herself. Not only did she hear what I said, she heard what Stringbean said. No big surprise considering how sharp those pointed elf ears of hers were.
“He did,” I said.
“So they’re coming for me, in force.”
“They are, although it’s not really you the siren wants, it’s me. Actually, she wants me out of the way so she can steal my treasure.”
Gladrielle stopped looking at the computer and turned her attention to me. “What is it with mermaids and sirens and treasures anyway?”
“We like to look at shiny things, things that sparkle and glitter. It makes us feel good. It makes us happy. I can’t speak for sirens, but without a treasure to look at, a mermaid can go into a deep depression.”
“Kind of the way I feel about flowers,” Gladrielle said.
“Kind of.”
“What’s a tactical squad?”
“A bunch of heavily armed humans.”
“Sounds like I should turn myself in.”
“Would you like to see my treasure room?” I said, shifting the direction of the conversation.
Gladrielle’s dark blue eyebrows arched in surprise. “I thought mermaids didn’t share their treasure with others.”
“I’m not going to show it to a siren or another mermaid, mostly because they’d get jealous. Wouldn’t show it to a human either, mostly because they’d want to steal it. But you’re an elf and elves aren’t into shiny things, so I think you’re safe.”
I had another reason for wanting to show Gladrielle my treasure. Not only did my treasure room have a solid steel door, the ceiling, floor, and walls were also solid steel. Gladrielle would be safe inside that room, safe from Crystal, safe from the humans that were coming for her, and safe from doing something stupid, like turning herself in.
The outer door to my treasure room was wood. It looked just like every other door in the place. You opened that door to discover another door just inside it, a solid steel door attached to a solid steel frame. That door was several inches thick and strong enough to withstand most supernaturals. It could only be unlocked with a large key, a key I wore around my neck twenty-four seven.
Once both doors were open, I stepped aside, so Gladrielle could enter the room. “After you.”
Gladrielle smiled and stepped into my treasure room. The room’s lights were attached to sensors, so they came on automatically, as soon as anyone entered the room.
The walls, ceiling, and floor were all stainless steel. Plexglass shelves fronted each of the walls. Plexglass boxes full of gold, silver, diamonds, emeralds, and rubies rested on the shelves. There were boxes full of gold doubloons, boxes full of silver pieces, boxes with diamond rings, boxes with diamond necklaces, boxes with emerald rings, boxes with emerald necklaces, and so on.
I kept my diamond tiaras on a separate shelf. Actually, I had four shelves with diamond tiaras. In the middle of those shelves, sat the gold crown that Titus gave me. Seeing it reminded me why I couldn’t let the humans have Gladrielle. I had failed to protect Titus, but I wasn’t going to fail again. I dragged Gladrielle into this mess and I was going to get her out of it.
In the middle of the room sat a fifty gallon Plexiglas barrel stuffed full of pearls. Some of the biggest, smoothest, shiniest pearls in the world. And of course, the lights were angled to make sure everything shined and sparkled.
“Oh my God!” Gladrielle said. “This is utterly insane.”
She shielded her eyes with her hand, protecting them from the blinding lights and the way they made everything glitter.
“It is, isn’t it.” Just seeing my shiny shiny treasures, even for a second, was making me feel better, prepping me for what was to come.
As Gladrielle moved deeper into the room, I backed out. Then I grabbed the heavy steel door and pulled it shut. Locking her inside.
“Low, what are you doing?” she said, pounding on the solid steel door.
“Keeping you safe. I’ll let you out when this is all over.”
Gladrielle said something else, but I didn’t listen. I just shut the wooden door, locked it, and moved back into the main part of the house.
I could hear sirens off in the distance, growing louder with each passing second. Crystal and her army were on their way, an army made up of people I used to work with. That meant one thing. It was time for a showdown with my arch nemesis.