“Richard,” Jeff said. The man lifted his head and slowly opened his eyes. “Meet Aidan, the alpha of the Dog Mountain pack.”
CHAPTER 19
~ JADE ~
“It’s official. I’m going to flunk out of high school,” I said, slapping my textbook shut. My whole plan of studying for an hour before meeting up with the team was so not going to happen. I couldn’t focus my mind on anything other than what my father could possibly want. He had been lying low, avoiding us completely, and Aidan had sat back and watched, just like he’d promised me. But this morning Dad had called, waking Aidan and me up, demanding a meeting.
Marcy giggled, a trill sound that burst through the speakerphone of my cell. “You’re not going to flunk out, Jade,” she said. “Half your teachers are part of the pack. They wouldn’t dare fail you.” Clunking footsteps and a rustle of fabric flitted through the phone suddenly and she squealed a little breathlessly. “Trevor, stop it. Alpha on the line.”
Trevor grunted something that I thought might have been an apology and I rolled my eyes, flopping back on the couch. “Don’t you guys have Erika duty today?” I asked, picking up the list of late assignments and scanning it over. It was ridiculous how much homework could pile up over a week. As far as I was concerned, there should be some kind of law about homework. How the school system expected people to sit in class all day and then spend hours each night cramming in more knowledge was beyond me. Not that I had been sitting in class much lately, but that was beside the point. It was a sunny Saturday morning and I was stuck on the couch surrounded by a mountain of work. Where was the home/school balance?
“Don’t remind me,” Marcy said, her voice sounding further away and a bit fuzzy as she switched me to speakerphone. “She’s driving me insane. Tell me again why we’re putting up with that ... that ...” she groaned. “See, she has me so pissed off I can’t even think of a good name for her. I get the whole going after the single alpha thing, but I don’t know how she could do this to Craig.”
“I’m supposed to be diplomatic now,” I said, dropping the list to the couch. “And protecting a wolf that helped the pack is diplomatic.”
Marcy snorted. “You, diplomatic? Yeah, right.”
“Hey, I totally resent that,” I said, except she probably had a point. I really wasn’t the diplomatic type, but still, I was trying to be somewhat reasonable. “I can be diplomatic. You’ve got to admit it, I’ve got skills. If I didn’t, you wouldn’t be lounging in Trevor’s bed right now, would you?” And pulling that one off had taken mad skills. I’d sat with her dad for hours trying to explain the whole mate status thing and what that actually meant. In the pack world, she was literally married now. I’d done a crapload of bargaining and more negotiating than I’d ever done before, but in the end, we’d finally come to an agreement and Marcy had moved in with her mate. Seriously, the whole thing had been a perfect example of exactly how diplomatic I could be when I needed to.
“How’s everything going with Aidan?” Trevor asked casually.
I took a deep breath. “I don’t know. He’s been crazy bossy, and I swear he hasn’t left me alone for even a second in the last two days. It’s like he thinks if he turns his back I’ll just vanish.” I’d known that trying to start over would be work — a lot of work — but he was being impossible. Problem was, whenever he was around birds flapped in my belly and my heartbeat pretty much tripled. He made my body sing and my inner-wolf dance. And I loved him. I really did. There was no denying it, not anymore. I just didn’t have the strength or energy to do it anymore. But sometimes space was a good thing, and Aidan hadn’t been giving me much space (or any space) over the last two days.
And yet here I was alone. Actually alone. Sure, I had basically shoved him out the door this morning, but still, after two days of his hovering it felt weird not having him standing over my shoulder, and whether I liked it or not, his absence made my inner-wolf uneasy.
“He’s your mate, Jade, and an alpha,” Trevor said. “Of course he’s bossy. His inner-wolf wants to keep you safe. It’s probably all he can think about. Give the guy a break.”
“He’s not my mate,” I countered, the weight of my words close to unbearable, and I suddenly found it hard to catch my breath. “I don’t know if this whole starting over idea was such a hot idea.”
That wasn’t entirely true. I didn’t regret starting over. In truth, even with Aidan’s constant closeness, and his increasing possessiveness, I was glad I was here — with him. But if I took that step, I wasn’t sure who I would be anymore. I wasn’t even really sure who I was now. I had adapted to my new life. I had survived. I thrived as a werewolf. And well, it had become comfortable. The truth? I was terrified that if I took that step with Aidan I’d lose myself, that I’d become just another piece of him. There had to be a balance — somewhere.
Never fall so hard that you can’t live without him. You need to stay your own person. Mom’s advice to Marcy when she’d broken up with Trevor for the first time never strayed far from my mind these days. I thought they were supposed to be words of wisdom, except I didn’t know how to stop myself from falling, and I was falling, fast. It didn’t help one freakin’ bit that our inner-wolves knew there would be no one else. They were done with waiting and darn it, but the thought made me glow from the inside out.
“Has the last few days really been horrible?” Marcy asked.
“No,” I said a little grudgingly, staring at the phone on the coffee table. “They’ve been perfect. He cooks, cleans. He’s considerate and he even lets me have the television remote. It’s sickening. He’s not supposed to be this sweet. But I need to just be Jade for awhile. I need to find my way through this, make a place for myself in the pack. I might have won the games for alpha female, but it’s almost as if the males can’t see me as my own person, like I’m just another arm of him, not important but there anyway.”
If I had been hoping they would disagree with me, I was left disappointed. The silence stretched on for a long moment before I asked, “Have you guys seen Jared? The guys won’t tell me anything and with Aidan hovering, I haven’t really been able to check on him.”
“It’s for the best, Jade,” Trevor said. “You need to forget about him. If you would move on and embrace your mate, you’d see a shift in everyone’s attitude.” His tone was firm, but not cold. Trevor was one of the few male pack members who hadn’t shunned me over the whole Jared thing, although I was pretty sure it was only because he was mated to my best friend. He had to play nice, and so did I.
“How is this fair?” I asked. “Aidan actually messed around with Erika and no one batted an eye at it. All I did was pretend to have a boyfriend, a few public kisses, that’s it.” A frustrated growl rumbled around my chest.
“Aidan hasn’t hated the pack for two years,” Trevor said, his tone measured and tense. I figured Marcy was probably giving him a look to stop him from telling me off. “We all know how you felt about us, it’s not like you hid it. You didn’t bother to try once you became one of us. You showed complete disregard for our ways, decided you didn’t need to follow our laws, and you publicly humiliated our alpha — your mate — and walked away with an enforcer.”
He was right. Yes, I had done all that, but in all fairness I hadn’t known that I was doing it. No one had bothered to tell me the rules.
The sound of a car pulling into the driveway drew my attention and I glanced out the window. I watched for a moment as a white Honda pulled to a stop and then a pack member got out. “Got to go, guys. Luken’s here,” I said, as I watched him walk up the driveway. He knocked on the door, a thumping three bangs that rattled the hinges. “Get to Beck’s. He needs a break.” They both mumbled a reluctant agreement before ending the call.
I crossed over to the door, pulling it open. I didn’t even get a chance to say hi before Luken asked, “Where’s the alpha?” His arms were folded over his massive chest and he focused a dark glare on me. The werewolf was close to enforcer status,
just one row down in the pecking order of the pack. He was built like an enforcer, too, tall with more muscle than any one person needed. He was in jeans, a black baseball cap, and an off-white fall jacket.
“You’re looking at her,” I said, aware that I had hesitated way too long before answering him.
He stood perfectly still for a moment as his nostrils flared, and then he leaned forward, taking a deep sniff of my scent. His lips curved in disgust. “You’re not my alpha. Where is he?”
I laughed, a startled sound, and brought a hand to my chest in mock hurt. “Ouch. You know if you guys keep this up, I might actually start to believe you don’t want me here.”
He lifted one shoulder in a small shrug. “We don’t,” he said. An easy smile curved his mouth. “Where’s Jared been?” He sounded cautious, as if he were testing how far he could push me without crossing the invisible line that would lead to me telling Aidan or unleashing my alpha scent on him. Even so, tension slid down my spine, awakening my inner-wolf, and ratcheting up my anxiety. I was sure that the males of the pack knew I was clutching onto my independence with a fiercely tight hold. Luken wasn’t the first in the last two days to talk to me like this, or ask me about Jared, and I was sure he wouldn’t be the last.
“What do you need, Luken?” I asked, planting my hands on my hips and giving him my best no-nonsense look. The wind ruffled his jacket, filling the space between us with a light rustling of fabric. “I’ve got stuff to do.”
I held onto my inner-wolf tightly, keeping her growing annoyance balled and contained. She was getting tired of the constant challenge of our authority, but really, so was I. In my mind, it shouldn’t matter that I wasn’t a mated alpha. I had taken out every challenger. I deserved their respect even if I had walked away from my mate.
“You wouldn’t understand.” He paused for a moment, and then said, “Just tell him to call me.” And with one last disgusted look my way, he turned from me and stalked down the driveway to his waiting car.
I stood there for a moment, feeling like a piece of crap, at least until the car door slammed. It was amazing how much damage I had done to the pack without even trying, and I was actually starting to feel guilty about it. I blinked, watching him pull out of the driveway before retreating back to the couch.
So that sucked, I thought. I didn’t want to believe it, but maybe Trevor was right. Maybe I needed to move on. But I knew I wasn’t wrong either. Wanting to be my own person, to not be defined by who I was with wasn’t wrong.
I glanced at my phone, reached for it, and pulled back. I knew there really was only one thing to do. I had to fix things and I knew exactly where I needed to start. I reached for my phone again, snagged it up, and made the call before I could change my mind.
CHAPTER 20
~ JADE ~
I sucked in the fresh air. My lungs couldn’t get enough of it. Clean and crisp and cool. The jog over to the clearing had been refreshing, relaxing. I stood hunched over, my hands on my knees, pulling the air into my lungs, and expelling it in slow, deep puffs.
The sun was out in full force this morning, coating the clearing where I had spent many hours in training with Jared and Beck, in a warm glow. Leaves rattled across the dried out grass as they were carried in a cool breeze.
I knew he was behind me, watching from the tree line, but I needed a moment to just breathe. His scent was thick in the air, a mix of caution and a hot spike of tempered anger. I figured he was waiting for someone else to show up. I didn’t really blame him for that, but it hurt a little that he assumed I’d try to set him up.
Another couple minutes passed before I heard the crunch of leaves under foot behind me. I pulled in a few more deep breaths and slowly straightened, turning toward him.
“Hey, little girl,” he said, looking me over with cool eyes as he walked toward me. I didn’t really know what I had expected when I saw him, but what I saw definitely wasn’t it. Jared looked … good. Really good, actually. He had gotten a haircut, his black hair short, spiked, and gelled. His face was clean shaven, smooth and fresh looking, and there wasn’t a stitch of darkness under his eyes. The tension he had carried around with him while he had stayed with me was gone. I didn’t recognize the leather jacket he was sporting, and underneath he had on a light green tee that I was sure I had never seen him wear before. He usually kept to blacks. It hugged his sculpted chest, outlining his thick pecs.
He stopped a few feet away from me, and his eyes swept over me in a thorough inspection. His nostrils flared a few times, and then he smirked. I knew what he was looking for, a change in my scent, and I seriously hated that smug look that was etching itself onto his face. “Does he know you’re here?” he asked, amusement thick in his voice.
“Does it matter?” I countered, blandly, lifting a brow. A gnawing sense that I was walking in a gray area surfaced and it scared the crap out of me. My muscles tensed, my stomach started to twist, and I tried to breathe through it, hoping he wouldn’t notice.
Jared chuckled, a husky sound. One that usually sent my inner-wolf into a round of manic back flips, but oddly enough, she was calm and steady. It was strange and well, amazing. But then I guessed living with Aidan had calmed her. But still, I had kind of expected the franticness, the racing heart, but it didn’t come and my coiled muscles began to unwind.
“Nope,” he said. His smirk widened. “Just didn’t figure he’d loosen up on that short leash he’s been keeping you on long enough for you to sneak away.”
Ouch. Okay, the truth of his statement kind of sucked. I tried not to frown, but it happened anyway. Yeah, Aidan had been keeping me close, but frankly, I was just as bad as he had been. I hated having him out of my sight.
But was I really so transparent that Jared could see that I had snuck out or did he just know me that well? I could feel the scrunch in my forehead, and a knot deep in my belly twisted and yanked. The gray area flapped in front of me again. I probably should have told Aidan, I thought. I should have given him a choice to come with me, too. But honestly, I hadn’t wanted to get that look again. The one that told me he didn’t trust me enough to go alone; the same one I would have given him if he had have told me he wanted to see Erika.
“I didn’t sneak away and he doesn’t have me on a leash,” I snapped, except it didn’t sound believable. I took a step toward him and he backed up a step, putting up a hand as if he were asking me not to come any closer.
My frown deepened, tugging at my lips. I huffed. He looked at me as if I were the dangerous one out of the two of us which was pretty much a laughable notion. I never thought I would see the day that I would make the head of the enforcers nervous. And, man, had I tried to make him nervous in our training. But Jared didn’t get nervous, not usually. He fought. Sometimes he lost, mostly he won. His job as an enforcer was black and white for him. Fear and nerves are for the weak, he’d told me. Win or lose, don’t show fear.
I plopped down onto the grass, stretching my legs out in front of me, and leaned back, propping myself up on my elbows trying to make myself look unthreatening. “Where have you been?”
“Around,” he said with a lazy lift of his shoulders. He scanned the length of my body again, letting his scent thicken in the air. When I gave him no reaction, he lowered himself to the ground, sprawling out on his back still a few feet away from me.
“Really?” I asked. “That’s all you’re going to give me?”
Jared sighed long and loud as he stared up at the cloudless sky. “What did you expect, Jade?” he asked in a hushed tone. “You made your choice. I didn’t want to stick around and watch.”
I groaned and cut him an exasperated look. Too bad he still wasn’t looking at me. “There was never a choice, Jared. I never hid that from you. You knew from the start I was his. Don’t you dare try to make this about us because you know damn well that there never was an us.”
He lay on his back as still as rocks except for the steady, even rise of his chest as he breathed. He was quiet for a cr
azy long moment before he finally said, “I needed a break. The team is a nightmare with Aidan’s newbies hanging around.”
I laughed. “Nightmare?” I said, and laughed again. “You want to talk about nightmares? Hell, I’m living in a damn nightmare.”
Jared chuckled. He shifted onto his side, propping his head up on his hand. His dark brown eyes searched my face with an intensity that made me shiver, not a pleasurable one. His eyes were cold and calculating and hard, and they traveled along my skin as if he were watching the shiver spread down my body. His lips quirked into a cocky, one-sided grin. “Awe, kitten, is that soon-to-be mate of yours not treating you as good as you thought he would?”
I bristled like a porcupine and my inner-wolf became seriously agitated within me at his insinuation. “He treats me just fine,” I said through my teeth. “It’s keeping him from hunting you down that’s the freakin’ nightmare. On top of that, most of the males hate me. And you hiding away like I’ve ripped out your heart is only fueling their anger. It makes us look guilty.”
That wiped the smirk off his face. His brown-black eyes hardened and cooled again. “Maybe we are guilty.”
I rolled up to my feet and paced the few steps over to him. “I’m not buying this poor me act,” I said, smirking. “And by the way, you suck at it.”
That earned me a throaty chuckle. “Come on, I know you felt a little bad.”
“The team needs you, Jared,” I said, ignoring him. “Aidan needs you. He might not want to admit it, but he does.” I extended a hand to him. For a minute, I didn’t think he was going to take it. He schooled his expression into a blank mask of indifference and as he did, I whispered, “Please.”
As soon as the whisper left my lips he took my hand and pulled himself up. He stood in front of me for a moment before he tugged on my hand and wrapped me in a tight hug, resting his chin on the top my head.