"Just like old times," Jason said when Brucco came into the room with atray of food. Without a word Brucco served Jason and the wounded men inthe other beds, then left. "Thanks," Jason called after his retreatingback.
A joke, a twist of a grin, like it always was. Sure. But even as hegrinned and his lips shaped a joke, Jason felt them like a veneer onthe outside. Something plastered on with a life of its own. Inside hewas numb and immovable. His body was stiff as his eyes still watchedthat arch of alien flesh descend and smother the one-armed Pyrran withits million burning fingers.
He could feel himself under the arch. After all, hadn't the wounded mantaken his place? He finished the meal without realizing that he ate.
Ever since that morning, when he had recovered consciousness, it hadbeen like this. He knew that he should have died out there in thatbattle-torn street. _His_ life should have been snuffed out, for makingthe mistake of thinking that he could actually help the battlingPyrrans. Instead of being underfoot and in the way. If it hadn't beenfor Jason, the man with the wounded arm would have been brought here tothe safety of the reorientation buildings. He knew he was lying in thebed that belonged to that man.
The man who had given his life for Jason's.
The man whose name he didn't even know.
There were drugs in the food and they made him sleep. The medicated padssoaked the pain and rawness out of the burns where the tentacles hadseared his face. When he awoke the second time, his touch with realityhad been restored.
A man had died so he could live. Jason faced the fact. He couldn'trestore that life, no matter how much he wanted to. What he could do wasmake the man's death worth while. If it can be said that any death wasworth while ... He forced his thoughts from that track.
Jason knew what he had to do. His work was even more important now. Ifhe could solve the riddle of this deadly world, he could repay in partthe debt he owed.
Sitting up made his head spin and he held to the edge of the bed untilit slowed down. The others in the room ignored him as he slowly andpainfully dragged on his clothes. Brucco came in, saw what he was doing,and left again without a word.
Dressing took a long time, but it was finally done. When Jason finallyleft the room he found Kerk waiting for him.
"Kerk ... I want to tell you ..."
"Tell me _nothing_!" The thunder of Kerk's voice bounced back from theceiling and walls. "I'm telling _you_. I'll tell you once and that willbe the end of it. You're not wanted on Pyrrus, Jason dinAlt, neither younor your precious off-world schemes are wanted here. I let you convinceme once with your twisted tongue. Helped you at the expense of moreimportant work. I should have known what the result of your 'logic'would be. Now I've seen. Welf died so you could live. He was twice theman you will ever be."
"Welf? Was that his name?" Jason asked stumblingly. "I didn't know--"
"You didn't even know." Kerk's lips pulled back from his teeth in agrimace of disgust. "You didn't even know his name--yet he died thatyou might continue your miserable existence." Kerk spat, as if the wordsgave a vile flavor to his speech, and stamped towards the exit lock.Almost as an afterthought he turned back to Jason.
"You'll stay here in the sealed buildings until the ship returns in twoweeks. Then you will leave this planet and never come back. If you do,I'll kill you instantly. With pleasure." He started through the lock.
"Wait," Jason shouted. "You can't decide like that. You haven't evenseen the evidence I've uncovered. Ask Meta--" The lock thumped shut andKerk was gone.
* * * * *
The whole thing was just too stupid. Anger began to replace the futiledespair of a moment before. He was being treated like an irresponsiblechild, the importance of his discovery of the log completely ignored.
Jason turned and saw for the first time that Brucco was standing there."Did you hear that?" Jason asked him.
"Yes. And I quite agree. You can consider yourself lucky."
"Lucky!" Jason was the angry one now. "Lucky to be treated like amoronic child, with contempt for everything I do--"
"I said lucky," Brucco snapped. "Welf was Kerk's only surviving son.Kerk had high hopes for him, was training him to take his placeeventually." He turned to leave but Jason called after him.
"Wait. I'm sorry about Welf. I can't be any sorrier knowing that he wasKerk's son. But at least it explains why Kerk is so quick to throw meout--as well as the evidence I have uncovered. The log of the ship--"
"I know, I've seen it," Brucco said. "Meta brought it in. Veryinteresting historical document."
"That's all you can see it as--an historical document? The significanceof the planetary change escapes you?"
"It doesn't escape me," Brucco answered briefly, "but I cannot see thatit has any relevancy today. The past is unchangeable and we must fightin the present. That is enough to occupy all our energies."
Jason felt too exhausted to argue the point any more. He ran into thesame stone wall with all the Pyrrans. Theirs was a logic of the moment.The past and the future unchangeable, unknowable--and uninteresting."How is the perimeter battle going?" he asked, wanting to change thesubject.
"Finished. Or in the last stages at least," Brucco was almostenthusiastic as he showed Jason some stereos of the attackers. He didnot notice Jason's repressed shudder.
"This was one of the most serious breakthroughs in years, but we caughtit in time. I hate to think what would have happened if they hadn't beendetected for a few weeks more."
"What are those things?" Jason asked. "Giant snakes of some kind?"
"Don't be absurd," Brucco snorted. He tapped the stereo with histhumbnail. "Roots. That's all. Greatly modified, but still roots. Theycame in under the perimeter barrier, much deeper than anything we've hadbefore. Not a real threat in themselves as they have very littlemobility. Die soon after being cut. The danger came from their beingused as access tunnels. They're bored through and through with animalruns, and two or three species of beasts live in a sort of symbiosisinside.
"Now we know what they are we can watch for them. The danger was theycould have completely undermined the perimeter and come in from allsides at once. Not much we could have done then."
The edge of destruction. Living on the lip of a volcano. The Pyrranstook satisfaction from any day that passed without total annihilation.There seemed no way to change their attitude. Jason let the conversationdie there. He picked up the log of the _Pollux Victory_ from Brucco'squarters and carried it back to his room. The wounded Pyrrans thereignored him as he dropped onto the bed and opened the book to the firstpage.
For two days he did not leave his quarters. The wounded men were soongone and he had the room to himself. Page by page he went through thelog, until he knew every detail of the settlement of Pyrrus. His notesand cross-references piled up. He made an accurate map of the originalsettlement, superimposed over a modern one. They didn't match at all.
It was a dead end. With one map held over the other, what he hadsuspected was painfully clear. The descriptions of terrain and physicalfeatures in the log were accurate enough. The city had obviously beenmoved since the first landing. Whatever records had been kept would bein the library--and he had exhausted that source. Anything else wouldhave been left behind and long since destroyed.
Rain lashed against the thick window above his head, lit suddenly by aflare of lightning. The unseen volcanoes were active again, vibratingthe floor with their rumblings deep in the earth.
The shadow of defeat pressed heavily down on Jason. Rounding hisshoulders and darkening, even more, the overcast day.