“Then if we’re all sure,” I said, “let’s go.”
It was a raw night with a bitter wind. Thick drifts of clouds were gathering, which would soon blot out the stars. We had no time to walk, or travel on horseback that night. I led my friends to the White Tor on the secret pathways, and they clung to one another as they passed through the whirling vortex of the air, emerging breathless and astonished at the entrance to the caves.
Sarah has made other accounts of the journey from the cave mouth to the underground kingdom where the Kinsfolk waited for their story to be completed. I don’t need to describe again the darkness, the dripping stone tunnels, the suffocating airlessness, the sounds and echoes that reverberate through the weirdly shaped rocks, the gurgle of icy water…. Josh led us well, and if he helped Evie more carefully and tenderly than he did the rest of us, I didn’t blame him. There was something about the two of them that night, some secret thoughts being passed between Evie and the boy who had loved her patiently for so long. I noticed that he took her hand as she stumbled over some loose stones underfoot, and that she didn’t pull away from him afterward. Their bodies seemed to speak to each other in the dark, and their minds searched for each other’s and were comforted as we went further into danger.
At last we reached the deep cavern and the murmuring black lake where we had first encountered Kundar and his Kinsfolk.
“Sarah,” I said, “will you please summon your people?”
She nodded and unfastened her backpack, taking out the bronze crown of leaves. Cal placed it proudly on her dark head. Then she held her arms out over the glimmering water and called to the men of the earth. “Kinsfolk…loyal warriors…awake from your sleep…. Your queen calls you….”
We waited and watched, straining our eyes against the darkness that pressed on all sides like creeping smoke. Our flashlights barely made any impression on the gloom.
“Look!” Cal gripped Sarah’s arm. “I can see something, there on the water!”
A long, hollowed-out boat was gliding over the lake toward us. I could just make out a hunched figure at its painted prow, someone using a wooden paddle that dipped in and out of the water.
“Kundar, thank goodness,” Evie breathed in relief. As he came close to the shore, I recognized his tough, weathered face. We didn’t really know how old he was—a thousand years—two thousand?—but we knew he was fiercely loyal and could be trusted with our lives, even in that dark place.
“I’m so glad to see you again, Kundar,” Sarah said, welcoming him gratefully.
“And I rejoice in your sight, queen of my people. I have come, as I said. Far in the overworld the moon is born again. Time smiles on you—for now. Hurry, hurry, little queen, before time wears your joys away. Hurry!”
He flapped his bony arms and indicated that we should all get into the boat. Sarah and Cal held hands and plunged through the shallow, bitingly cold water and scrambled into it, followed by Evie and Josh. Kundar stood up, and the boat rocked from side to side. “Come,” he said, stretching out his hand to me. “Come with us, wind-spirit, air-dancer, light-bearer. Come into the darkness and face your destiny.”
His words echoed eerily in the damp, airless cavern. I felt suffocated in that deep place, but I reached out to take Kundar’s hand and leaped into the boat.
“Take us then,” I said. “Take us to the Eye of Time.”
Kundar pushed away from the shallows and began to steer the boat skillfully, taking us out into the lake. It was impossible to see as far as the opposite shore, and as we glided farther and farther into the blackness, I hated to think of the unknown depths of murky water beneath us, and the creatures it might contain. But Kundar made steady progress, crooning softly to himself. Then he slowed the little craft as we came up against, not the far shore as I had expected, but a forbidding cliff of solid rock.
“What does this mean, Kundar?” I asked anxiously. “We can’t go any farther.”
“I can take you down the secret waterways,” he said. “Only the Kinsfolk know them now.” He allowed the boat to drift right up to the rock face, and then we saw that there was a narrow opening, just wide enough to allow the boat to enter. I had to catch my breath as Kundar steered us into the crack and the walls closed in on us. Evie pressed close to Josh, but I saw Sarah sit tall and straight in her crown of leaves at the front of the boat, at home in the earth at the root of all things.
The rocky walls seemed to be covered with some kind of phosphorescent slime, which glowed with a murky green light. I thought that the boat must get stuck at any moment, but Kundar kept to his course, even though the roof sank so low that it almost touched our heads. It was as though we were floating inch by inch right into the very heart of the earth, which might crush us at any moment like insignificant insects. “Mother earth, be kind to us,” I prayed. “Let your massive strength protect us, please—please—”
Something changed in the air. It grew cooler and fresher, the water grew shallower, and at last we were through to the other side of the stifling tunnel. The boat glided to a halt on a bed of fine sand, and we climbed out thankfully. We were in a cave of sparkling crystal lit by hanging bronze lamps. In the center, a massive square pillar of stone reached right up to the roof. It was covered with intricate carved shapes, and at the very top there was an image of a great, staring eye.
Kundar was the first to approach the pillar, but although he pointed out its wonders, he was careful not to touch it. “See! Four sides of the Eye. North, south, east, and west. It looks all ways. It sees the past, the present, the future, and it sees what might have been.”
I gazed in awe at the pillar. Sarah started to unpack her bag busily, taking out candles and herbs and other mystical signs of our craft, as well as the Book of lore.
“What’s next?” Josh asked in a hushed voice.
“We have to reach Laura’s spirit and speak to her,” I said, and Cal muttered at my side, “I hope she’ll still listen. How do we know she hasn’t become some kind of demon by now?”
“We don’t,” Evie answered nervously.
“Wyldcliffe is a land of dark spirits,” said Kundar. “From age to age the Shadows come upon the land and we are bewildered. Sometimes disease comes, sometimes war—sometimes evil.”
“It’s also a land of miracles,” I said quietly. “That’s what we have come for tonight. A miracle.”
But something made me hesitate. Did I really believe I had the power to do this?
“We can do this,” Sarah whispered, as though she had read my mind. “You can do anything you want, Helen.”
The cavern echoed with memories. I think you can do anything you want to…you can be anything you want. You can even be happy, if you want to be. You just have to believe it.
I couldn’t help exclaiming softly, “That’s what he said!”
“Who?”
I smiled briefly and shook my head. “No one. Let’s begin.”
“Then show us what to do, Helen,” Cal said. “Let’s not stay down here any longer than we need to.”
I walked slowly all the way around the square pillar, looking up to where it joined the glittering roof. It was like a great tree root that had no beginning or end. Then I noticed that there was a long, rough stone laid at the bottom of the pillar, like a bench or low table. “What’s this?”
“Sacrifice,” said Kundar. “A place of sacrifice to appease Time’s hunger. Give and he will give to you.”
“But what shall we give?” I looked at the others. “What do we have that only we can give?”
There was no reply. My friends looked at one another uncertainly. I realized they were waiting for me to lead them and was touched by their faith in me. I could do this. I could do anything. “Let’s cast the Circle,” I said.
Sarah and Cal set out a wide ring of white pebbles around the pillar. Then Evie said, “We need fire, for Agnes.” She and Josh made another ring of candles, white for innocence, purple for mourning, and red for life. Their flames
glowed like flowers. Into a wide, round bowl, Evie poured a flask of water that glittered in the candlelight. She stood up, lightly touching the Talisman that hung from her neck, and said, “May the earth be strong under our feet. May the fire of love guide our actions. May the water of the living stream cleanse our thoughts.”
I searched inside myself and connected with my inner powers, the storms and winds of freedom that were hidden deep inside. I raised my hands, and a sweet breeze blew through the crystal cavern. Music, bright and delicate as starlight, rang out. “Powers of air,” I said, “lift our hearts above the mistakes of the past. May the winds of change fill our hearts with song.”
Josh handed me the Book, then stood to one side with Cal and Kundar. I opened it at random, and it fell open at a page with an image of the zodiac riding through the stars, and clear bold lettering, saying, “TIME IS, TIME WAS, TIME WILL BE.” It seemed like a good omen. I laid the Book on the stone of sacrifice at the bottom of the pillar, and then took a folded sheet of paper from my pocket. It was a drawing of Laura that I had done, a copy of the photograph that hung over Evie’s bed in the dorm. I placed it next to the Book.
I was ready.
“Laura,” I called. “You had your youth and happiness taken from you. Hope, joy, and friendship were stolen from you. To make recompense, we give you what we can. I ask the Eye of Time to look at what might have been, and I give you a friendship that now I will never know. Take from my future to heal Laura’s past.” As I spoke, I felt a surge of energy leave my body. A halo of light glowed around Laura’s picture.
Evie followed my lead. “I give a golden summer’s day that now I will never see.” The aura around the picture gleamed again. “Let the light shine on Laura instead.”
Then Sarah came forward. “I give a day of hope that now will not come to comfort me. Let Laura be comforted instead.” The picture glowed with a steady light.
“We must all offer the best that is in us,” I said. “Laura was destroyed by hatred. We must offer our love to her now, to make amends. We offer our love.”
Evie and Sarah repeated softly, “We offer our love.”
I turned to the boys. “You wanted to share our quest. Will you offer something for Laura?”
Cal stretched out his tanned, strong hand toward the picture, saying gruffly, “I offer my strength, to serve and protect.” Then it was Josh’s turn. He held out his hand to the image of Laura, but looked at Evie as he said in a clear, ringing voice, “In the name of the Talisman, I offer my love.” Then he stepped back and said quietly to Evie, “I’ve offered you that from the first time we met.”
There was silence for a moment; then Kundar crooned, “It is a good sacrifice. Now you must make your magic. The moon rides swiftly through the sky, and the morning gallops near like the horses of the valley.”
Evie, Sarah, and I linked hands in the Circle, murmuring, “Agnes, sister of fire, be with us tonight!” I gazed at Laura’s picture and called, “Child of time, child of nature, child of the light, come to us!” I began to sing, “Child of creation, child of the stars, child of the sun, come out of the Shadows, awake, awake….”
“Awake, awake,” echoed Evie and Sarah; then we fell silent. Laura’s picture had come to life, like a photograph turning into a movie. She looked out at us, eager, but frightened.
“Laura!” I called. “Will you pass from your bondage to the light? Will you leave your prison?”
“I want to…,” Laura whispered. “But you need stronger powers to break my bonds.” Her image seemed to fade and distort; then it turned back into a lifeless drawing.
“No! Wait!” I said. “Wait!” But it was too late. She couldn’t hear us anymore.
“It’s not working,” I said, bitterly disappointed. Our Circle wasn’t enough for this task. Our powers were missing something. Evie had her Talisman and Sarah wore her crown. But what did I have? What gift was I really bringing to our secret ceremony?
That’s when I knew what I had to do. This was the moment to claim the Seal, not for myself, but to help someone who had suffered more than I had. I was ashamed at that moment that I had ever complained about my life. Laura’s life had been totally destroyed, whereas I still had hope…I still had the Seal.
I hurried to unfasten the brooch from my clothes. I just had to believe in my powers, and in my connection with this object and what it represented.
And what if the Seal answered? Would that mean that I’d have to choose a life of service, instead of fulfillment? The person who accepts this Seal will never marry, or have children, or grow old, or truly die. Was I really willing to make that sacrifice, to make a different choice from the one my mother had made all those years ago? I thought of Lynton, and my secret hopes. Could I ever be loved by Lynton and make a “normal” life with him? Or was this my fate: to love others and work for them without hope of reward?
I looked at the Seal. A circle crossed by two sweeping lines. Bright wings flying across the sun…My heart was beating faster; I was terrified, but I was willing to risk everything to do this. I wanted to save Laura. I wanted to walk the path of healing. And I knew that Lynton would want me to do it too.
Now…and now…and now…
I was ready.
I stood at the center of the earth’s dark heart, under the Eye of Time. We had made a circle of flame, and stone, and wind, and water. We were all linked in friendship. The place where circles meet and all paths cross. I put the Seal on the stone of sacrifice and knelt in front of it. Silently I withdrew into my innermost self and reached out to my sacred element. I saw the swirling gases of the universe forming and re-forming, I became the wind sweeping across vast continents, I blew the first breath into a newborn baby’s lungs. I was air and energy and invisible light. Words came to me, and I spoke aloud:
“I am fire and air,
I am earth and rain,
All things meet in me
And are made new again.”
I reached out and lightly touched the brooch where the two daggerlike pieces crossed. “Open,” I commanded. “I am ready.”
The Seal burst into light. Everything changed. I was on top of the Ridge in the circle of stones, standing under a black sky sprinkled with whirling stars. Time was turning. The wind raced across the land, the breath of life. A company of radiant beings was singing all around me, and I held the Seal above my head, casting its light over the whole valley of Wyldcliffe. A girl’s shape emerged from the great black stone in the center of the circle. She was walking slowly toward me, and her face was alive with joy and hope.
“Laura!”
Then I was back in the underground cavern, willing her to follow me from the visionary place into the world of earth and stone. “Laura,” I called. “Become our sister tonight! Join our circle! Leave your prison and join the dance of life and death! We give you our strength and courage—we give you the light that shines for all who die young.”
The next moment Laura was standing in front of us. She was alive and whole and well—but just as Evie and Sarah were going to embrace her, an icy wind blew and they fell back.
I said, “We have awakened you, not to life, Laura, but to the gift of death. Will you walk through its gateway? Do you accept this gift?”
“I do.”
A calm smile was on Laura’s face, and a light was shining in her. I commanded the Seal again, and the wind grew into a storm of whirling stars and light and music, and the last remnant of Laura’s bondage was blown away forever. Her wandering soul was free at last as she left this earth and dissolved into the Eternal Light. The pages of the Book blew wildly this way and that, and then it slammed shut.
“She’s gone,” whispered Evie, clutching Josh’s hand.
“You did it, Helen,” Sarah exclaimed. “You opened the Seal at last!”
There was a moment of wild celebration—hugs and kisses and tears of relief. Then Cal turned to me. “Laura’s free now, isn’t she? She’s passed over to the next life, and your mother can’
t touch her anymore.”
“Yes,” I said thankfully, “she’s free.” I took a deep breath. It was time to tell the truth. “There’s something I have to tell you now, a confession I need to make. It’s about my mother.”
But as I spoke, the eye at the top of the pillar cracked into a thousand pieces. The pillar groaned and split apart with a thunderous crash, and the Priestess stood before us in all her macabre glory. She was robed in black and scarlet, and the expression on her face was as hard as the stones that lay in rubble around her. “Ah, Helen dear. But you look surprised to see me, child.”
Cal and Josh sprang forward as if to attack her, but I held them back. “Wait! Let’s give her a chance to speak.” I turned to the dreadful vision that was my mother’s spirit. “I promised I would come for you after Laura was allowed to pass. Now I can help you—”
“I don’t need your help,” the Priestess said coldly. “I could not break free of the rock by myself, but Laura was my wild card—my way out. I knew that one hint about finding her at the Eye of Time would be enough to set you meddling and worrying away until you had worked it out.”
“So—what—what happened?”
The Priestess laughed gloatingly. “The Pillar of Time is the root of the great stone on the Blackdown Ridge where you so cleverly ensnared me in our last battle. I admire your skill for that Helen, truly. But I was always one step ahead of you. I had anticipated that one day I might need a way out of your enthusiastic attempts to contain me, and I also knew that guilt about the Bondsoul Laura was eating away at you. I lied when I said she had left me. When you trapped me, you trapped her too, but I guessed you would try to free her one day. Many months ago I set a marker upon Laura’s wretched spirit so that if I ever needed help, the energy of her passing would release my own spirit. I was prepared to let Laura go. I can make more Bondsouls—tens and hundreds and thousands of them! I was willing to lose her in order to gain the greater prize of freedom for me, and enslavement for you.”