After getting back to my dorm room, I continued working on homework another hour before switching to one of my personal electronics projects. The hours slipped past, and I was surprised to find it becoming dark outside when I finally stopped. I might have kept working late into the night if I hadn’t been interrupted by a phone call from Tilly.
“Hey Barry, are you free tonight?”
“I could be,” I answered, “I mean I’m tinkering on a project, but nothing I couldn’t set aside. What’s up?”
“I just found out that Omicron Epsilon Iota is having a house party tonight, We don’t normally run patrols on Sunday, but I thought maybe someone should swing through later and see if anyone needs an escort home or anything like that. Care to join me?”
“Sure. What time?”
“Meet me at my dorm a little before nine. We can walk over from there.”
“Sounds like a plan. See you then.” I hung up, turned off my soldering iron, put away my other electronics tools, and started to get ready. After showering and changing clothes, I still had time to stop at the cafeteria before going to Tilly’s. This was a good thing as I had worked right through lunch, and my stomach was now reminding me of it.
I knocked on Tilly’s door about ten minutes before nine. She answered almost immediately, and we engaged in only minimal small talk before heading toward the fraternity house. We continued talking as we walked.
“Thank you for doing this,” said Tilly, “I was going to go with Cloe, but she just didn’t have it in her to do a frat party tonight.”
“No problem, I'm happy to help,” I replied, “So how is Cloe?”
“Not good, actually. She was doing better after we started the watch. I think doing something constructive like that was really helping her deal with her own... you know... stuff, but hearing about Rebecka really took the wind out of her sails.”
“Rebecka? Is she part of the watch?”
“No, she's that woman who spoke at the Take Action meeting last week, the student who talked about her own assault.”
“I remember now. I recall she was not happy with the Dean's office.”
“Exactly. And it hasn't gotten any better. The administration still hasn't done anything, and now she's getting harassed. Threatening phone calls, emails, notes on her door. It seems that asshole rapist has friends, and they are getting the signal loud and clear that they have nothing to fear from the college. It all got to be too much. Rebecka dropped out of school on Friday.”
“Damn.” I didn't know what else to say. The situation well and truly sucked.
“Yeah, and it really sent Cloe into a tailspin. Rebecka was her hero. She was actually standing up and pushing back even though it made her a target for all sorts of gossip and rumors and crap. I'm worried that Cloe is thinking of dropping out too. She talked about it after her own assault.”
I didn't know how to answer. I hadn't known Cloe long, I didn't really know Rebecka at all, but the thought of what they were going through filled me with a cold, quiet anger. It made me feel slightly sick. It left me voiceless. Fortunately, we arrived at the fraternity house just then, so I was saved from having to form a coherent response.
Nevertheless, even as we paid the cover charge and entered the party, my mind couldn't let go of what Tilly had told me and how it made me feel. If this was empathy, I was ready to trade it in for a new superpower. Telekinesis. Invisibility. Anything else. Empathy seemed to just get me in trouble and make me feel awful.
The frat party had a respectable crowd for a Sunday night. No band, but the DJ was doing a good job of picking high energy music that kept the party atmosphere cranked. We jostled our way through the crowd, keeping an eye out for anything suspicious. Tilly talked to a variety people, making sure they knew they could get an escort home if they needed one. She handed out slips of paper with the phone number and web address of the Watch. We worked our way through the house, taking a break in the The Hallowed Hall of Alumni. The room was toward the back of the house, far enough away from the action that the music was reduced to a thumping base rhythm devoid of tune. Consequently, the room had far fewer people in it, unless you counted the many portraits of former fraternity members that adorned the walls.
“Hey Barry, what brings you out from the caves of perpetual study?”
I turned to discover my study friend Jake was one of the few occupants of the room. “Just blowing off some steam after a weekend of hitting the books,” I replied. I hadn't told Jake about the neighborhood watch, and I didn't feel like explaining it right then.
“There is hope for you yet, compadre. Same here, actually. Jenny and I came over with a group from the dorms.” Jake introduced us to Jenny, a young woman with brown hair, thin rimmed glasses, and a pained expression.
“We had to get away from the music for a while,” she explained, “it was giving me a headache.”
“They really are cranking it,” Tilly agreed. She introduced herself, and then leaned in close to Jenny and whispered, “Come find me if you need someone to walk home with.”
Jake frowned briefly as he witnessed this private exchange, then turned to me and said, “So Barry, where's your main squeeze? Does Dee know you're out with some other good looking gal?” He said it playfully, but I sensed an undercurrent in the words.
“Tilly and I are just friends,” I assured him, “it is possible, you know, to just be friends with a woman.”
Jake snorted, though whether in disbelief or humor, I couldn't be sure. The four of us wandered the room, chatting and looking at the alumni pictures on the wall.
“Now that's weird,” commented Jenny. She was looking at a large ax hanging on the wall among the many pictures. Below it was a metal plaque declaring it The Ax of Divine Justice.
“Oh I've heard of this,” Jake responded, “The rumor is that this ax was used to chop down some prized fruit tree on the dean's property. It was retaliation for the dean cracking down on the fraternities for underage drinking. The dean was majorly pissed and ready to kick the frats off campus, but then he got push back from a bunch of the alumni and backed down. They keep the ax here as a way to sort of flip the ol' bird at the dean. Nothing was ever proved, so there's nothing he can do about it.”
“Wow, that is unbelievable,” Jenny said.
“I believe it,” Tilly responded, “the school's endowment is funded mostly by alumni, so they have a lot of pull, and a lot of them belonged to fraternities or sororities.”
My thoughts returned to Rebecka and her allegations. The idea that the administration would sweep a scandal under the rug just to keep the alumni happy was troubling but all too believable. This was just more evidence. My eyes drifted from the ax to the many pictures on the wall. I had never really understood the attraction of joining a fraternity. It seemed like a formalization of the cliquishness and conformity that I hated in high school. I wasn't exactly a loner in high school; I got along with just about everyone well enough, but there was never any one group that I identified with. Sure, a fraternity was a great way to make a lot of new friends quickly, plug into a support system to help one through the college experience, but those benefits also come with obligations... an expectation of being there for your fraternal brothers as much as they are there for you. I've never liked having other people depend on me.
“All these pictures are beginning to give me the creeps,” Tilly announced, “It's like they're staring at us.” She turned to me. “You ready to dive back into the action, Barry?”
“Once more into the breach, dear friend,” I answered. We said our goodbyes to Jake and Jenny and headed back toward the front of the house.
The party was still going strong. Sofas had been pushed back to form a dance floor, and the DJ was doing his part keep the place the jumping. Tilly and I worked the periphery of the crowd, handing out more slips of paper. This netted us a few text messages from people looking for an escort back to the dorms. Tilly or
ganized people into groups leaving at similar times, making sure nobody had to walk back alone. We stayed until the party was sputtering to a halt, then headed out ourselves.
The night was cool and quiet. My ears buzzed, like some whisper of the endless dance music had taken root within them. Tilly and I walked silently for a while, enjoying the quiet.
“Thanks for the help,” she finally said,
“You're welcome,” I answered, “but it was no trouble, really. I mean, I pretty much just went to a party. You did most of the work.”
“You helped a lot actually. If you hadn't been with me, I would have spent half the night avoiding drunk guys hitting on me.”
I laughed. “Ah yes, boyfriend camouflage. It's just one of my superpowers.”
Tilly shot me a curious look.
“Sorry... it's a long story.” Tilly raised her eyebrow further, asking a question with her expression. “OK, long story short, my friend Dee needed some help with her mother, and, um, possible match-making from that quarter.”
“Ah, say no more. I have an older sister that's always trying to fix me up.” We walked a few more paces before Tilly asked, “So you and Dee are just friends?”
“Yeah, just friends,” I answered, “Well, its a bit more complex than that. I don't really know how to describe it.”
“Relationships often are. Complex, that is. We like to try put them in the neat little boxes with convenient labels, but every relationship is unique. Sometimes the labels don't fit. She cares about you though. That much is obvious.”
“We barely know each other,” I admitted.
“That doesn't really matter. The heart knows what it knows. I barely know you, but I know you're a friend.”
“Thanks, I feel the same. About being a friend I mean. I'm not sure what I did to deserve it actually, all these friendships I've stumbled into recently.”
“Maybe its what you haven't done.”
Now it was my turn to raise an eyebrow.
“You don't treat every conversation like some sort of sexual negotiation,” she explained. “It gets downright exhausting sometimes, dealing with guys that can't think beyond that. That can't see a woman as just a person first.”
Jake immediately came to mind. “I apologize on behalf of my gender,” I answered, trying to infuse the statement with as much humor as I could. Tilly rewarded me with a laugh.
“You really are a breath of fresh air, Barry. You're... genuine. At least I think you are.” She turned and spoke with mock seriousness, “This isn't all just an act, is it? Some long con to steal my affections?”
“I'm not that clever,” I assured her.
“We joke, but it happens. I almost prefer the guys that are up front and obvious about being on the make. At least I know what to expect from them. But then there's that type of guy who seems all decent and respectful, until suddenly he's complaining about being 'friendzoned'... all pissed off and hurt that I'm not hooking up with him.”
“Yeah, I've known guys like that.” I was reminded of a conversation with Jake. He had complained about friendzoning. "Women are not vending machines that you put kindness coins in until sex falls out.”
“What? Oh wow that's great. Mind if I steal it?”
“Go ahead, it's not mine. I read it on the Internet somewhere. I was just remembering a conversation where I really wanted to say that to someone. I chickened out.”
We arrived at the dorms and said goodnight to each other. Tilly gave my hand a friendly squeeze as we parted, thanking me again for my help. I walked back to my own dorm room, my mind replaying the events and conversations of the night. I thought about friendship and romance and the challenges that both offer. I thought about Tilly and how uncomplicated our friendship felt and wondered why that was surprising to me. I thought about Dee.
Finally arriving at my dorm room, I quickly got ready for bed. As I set my phone on its charging stand, I noticed the voice mail indicator. At some point during the house party, I had missed a call from Dee. I stared at the icon for a full minute before finally playing the message.
“Barry, get to the lair as soon as you can tomorrow. We have another mission.”