Chapter 25: Monday 24th to Sunday 30th August.
I quickly realised that Marcie and Rachel’s main objections were for Debbie’s welfare and spent most of the week trying to convince them of how fondly I loved them and that it was only after Tracey’s death I realised my love for Debbie.
I was surprised at how my luck was holding out as they interrogated me individually.
I got the distinct impression that as I hadn’t slept with ‘Screwball,’ known by them to be a cheap nymphomaniac, I must be speaking the truth.
Debbie often called in to collect her belongings and spent several hours speaking with Marcie and Rachel about this new step in her life.
As she had left the bank without stopping to pick up her coat or clear her locker she made an appointment to see the manager, Mr. MacLaughlin, to explain the circumstances of her departure and offered to work whatever period of notice he imposed upon her.
He and his staff couldn’t have been nicer to Debbie and more pleased for her and all wished her well for the future.
We offered an open invitation to all staff at the bank to attend the wedding if they wished.
When I reached my desk on Monday the 24th I immediately called Sarah to me.
“Yes Boss?” she smiled clutching her trusty notepad and pencil as she closed the door firmly behind her coming to perch upon my desk.
Without speaking I stood up, wrapped my arms around her and kissed her ruby red lips, with as much passion as I could muster for a few minutes.
At first she struggled to resist but as I held her so tightly her futile protests became weaker until she relaxed.
Holding her tightly in my embrace, we stared deeply into each other’s eyes for a few seconds until she broke her spell on me by asking “and what the hell was that for?”
”Sarah,” I sighed,
“That was for all the things you’ve done for me over these past few months.
That’s for all the times you’ve sat there listening to me while I totally screwed up my life.
That is for all the advice you’ve given me and all the doubts you have cleared up.
For keeping all my secrets safe and - against all odds - understanding the things I have been through and never giving up on me.
That’s for always being there when I needed you.”
I felt a tear drip from my right eye as my arms began to ache from squeezing her so tightly.
“Sarah, I will never be able to thank you enough for all you’ve done for me.
For all the hours we have spent talking to one another.
I will never be able to repay you for the help you’ve given me.”
I kissed her again.
“Thank-you, Sarah. Thank-you.
You will never know how grateful I am to you for your advice.
And if there is ever anything I can do for you at any time, just ask and it’s yours - okay?”
“You are very welcome,” she whispered as I gently kissed her forehead and releasing her from my grip, she remained motionless while I resumed my seat.
“You could always take me to Glasgow with you?” she whispered.
“Sarah,” I sighed, “If only that were possible.
Not only have I inherited an office, but Celia Johnston comes with it.”
I took her hand in mine and squeezing it tenderly I whispered,
“I’m sure you’ll get on just as well with my successor as we did, okay?”
“Okay,” she smiled.
“Now, back to business.” I resumed my usual air of authority.
“Sarah, take a memo.”
“Yes sir,” She smiled raising her notepad.
“To Cathy Parker in personnel at head office,” I began as she scribbled,
“Following my recent promotion my present position as Finance Controller at Edinburgh office will soon become vacant.”
We summarised my duties and wrote a job description.
“Anyone wishing to apply for the vacancy and would like an interview, please telephone Sarah Nicholson on extension 261 prior to Noon on 31st August when successful applicants will be contacted.”
The remainder of the week went by without much ado.
Every minute detail for the wedding was confirmed, encase anybody had any doubts that it was going ahead.
Friday 28th August.
Friday evening when Jaclyn and I arrived home we were surprised to see five large brown cardboard boxes, taped and sitting in the hallway with Yorkhill Hospital, Glasgow written in bold black marker pen on the sides.
“I wonder what’s going on here?” Jaclyn asked.
I kept silent, as I knew exactly what the boxes contained - all Debbie’s teddies, dolls and furry animals, which were being donated to the children’s hospital - but I didn’t understand why, until we entered the living room.
Debbie was sitting at her usual chair at the table with Marcie and Rachel, all strangely silent until Jaclyn smiled. “Hello kid. How are you doing?”
“I was fine until a little while ago,” Debbie snorted.
When our meal was finished Debbie rose from her seat and walked past me saying; “I’d like a quiet word with you.”
I followed her to her room, bear of her menagerie, looking very different to my last visit.
Closing the door behind me Debbie walked, arms folded, to stand looking out of her window.
“I need to be able to trust you.” She began.
“You can trust me,” I pleaded, “Why, has someone said something to make you doubt me?”
“People have been talking,” she began slowly, “They’ve been saying you masterminded this whole thing and can’t be trusted.”
“Debbie, my darling,” I pleaded, “I’ve done a few things in my time I’m not happy with, but I have no idea what you mean.
I didn’t mastermind anything and I hope you can trust me.”
“When Tracey died,” she continued turning to face me, “you saw how devastated I was.
It was the saddest day of my entire life.
Some people are telling me you took advantage of me and used that for your own ends.
I’ve shared my doubts with Marcie and Rachel and they feel I should know how many people you’ve slept with?”
Crossing to the bed I sat upon the edge desperately seeking explanations.
“Before I answer I need to know why you want to know?
Anybody I loved before you and I became engaged are in my past and - without sounding cruel - I don’t see them as being any of your business, but I can and will, gladly, tell you.”
I patted the bed asking her to sit beside me as I confessed.
“The first girl I ever loved was Mary.
I went out with her from age 22 for about eighteen months.
When Mary two-timed me with Tracey’s boyfriend I felt so betrayed by her - and this guy - Andy, I used to call my friend - I started going out with Tracey purely to spite them.”
“Within a few weeks we heard that Andy and Mary had fallen out and were trying to persuade myself and Tracey to resume our previous relationships, but both Tracey and I would never have two-timed anyone and felt deeply hurt by them.”
“We quickly realised love was growing between Tracey and me and she was my only love for five years … until I moved in here.”
“I need to know that I can trust you.” Debbie spoke very sincerely and calmly.
“Since moving into this house with you guys I have, unfortunately, been unfaithful twice.” I stated with utmost sincerity.
“ I see” Debbie sighed not amused.
“I will never be able to thank you for what you have done arranging me to meet with Tony and Catherine.
I have spent many hours with them, before the adoption went through, trying to convince them that I can never expect to take the place of the daughter they adored for 27 years. Nobody ever can.
For Tony and Catherine to accept me at all after all they have been through is quite an achievement in itsel
f.” She sighed. “but I think they may be having a problem believing that replacing Tracey as your wife so soon is such a good idea.
I need to relieve myself of these doubts I have. I’m sorry.” She pleaded.
“Debbie, my darling, I understand your concerns, but I’m not sure I should tell you because I promised I would never kiss and tell.”
“Rachel informs me,” she sighed, “She spent two nights with you, so I suppose that answers my question.”
“To be perfectly honest,” I sniggered, “I didn’t include Rachel as I have indeed spent two nights with her in my bed, but I never made love with her.”
“Oh,” she was surprised, “You mean there are another two?”
“I mustn’t tell,” I implored, “I promised I wouldn’t.”
“I’m sure” she assured me, “Lynda wouldn’t want us to fall out because of her.”
“Actually,” I laughed to relieve the tension, “Lynda was one of the ones I promised, but I have never slept with her either.
I don’t have any problem telling you, but there are others who could get hurt if their secret gets out.”
“Listen, Debbie,” I implored taking her hand in mine, “I realise if you knew I was unfaithful with Tracey that you would doubt I could ever be faithful with you.
I implore you – I will vow never to be unfaithful to you as long as we both live.”
“I need to know,” Debbie apologised, “I don’t know why, but I just need to know.”
Debbie’s eyes filling with tears betrayed the fact that we both knew that she was in grave danger of bringing our brief relationship to an abrupt end tonight …unless I could rescue the situation.
“Debbie, my darling,” I began choosing my words very carefully,
“There was no master plan when I realised at the cemetery that you and Tony and Catherine could find some comfort from being together.
Tracey was the love of my life and my future without her seemed very bleak indeed.
I had no idea how I was going to get through life without her and I felt very, very unhappy and miserable - more miserable than any time in my entire life.
There is no excuse for betraying Tracey and if she had found out about my unfaithfulness she would have been off like a shot. Perhaps, if that had been the case I could have had no regrets in asking you to marry me then and life could have just carried on without any of these doubts between us.
But Tracey didn’t fall out with me and storm off in a strop – she fell pregnant and she couldn’t wait to come and tell me and met with an unfortunate accident on the way here.
Tracey’s accident was nobody’s fault but I felt responsible for her not being around anymore, but that was not the plan when I came up with Tony and Catherine adopting you. My only thoughts at that time were how could I help everyone find some good from this terrible tragedy?
I had no idea then that Tony and Catherine would accept you and even less idea that I would ask you to marry me – although I have loved you for a very long time and promise I will love you and only you for the rest of our lives.”
Debbie remained silent.
“Okay,” I assured her sincerely,
“The second person I slept with since coming here was.” I paused, “and you mustn’t ever tell anybody, please?” I begged.
Debbie assured me she wouldn’t tell anybody as I bowed my head to confess.
“The second person I slept with was … Melanie.”
“Melanie!” she exclaimed, “She’s Rachel’s partner. When was this?”
“The night before Sandra’s birthday party.” I answered,
“Melanie arranged for me to go over to her flat to pay for Tracey’s engagement ring and, regretfully, I ended up spending the night with her.”
“What if Rachel found out?” she was concerned enough to ask.
“Actually,” I assured her, “Rachel was in Glasgow that night with Tracey.”
“Oh,” she was becoming confused, “That makes it alright does it?”
“No,” I assured her, “that was a big mistake - but Melanie made me promise never to speak of it, so that Rachel wouldn’t ever find out.”
I rubbed her shoulders, as I begged, “Please don’t say anything to Rachel as I promised I wouldn’t ever say anything.”
Debbie promised she wouldn’t ever tell Rachel.
“The night before Sandra’s party?” She asked. “Yes” I answered.
“That would be the night before you told me that you loved ME then?”
“Come to think of it,” I answered, “Yes it was.”
“So,” Debbie remained calm, “Within 24 hours of you sleeping with (she paused and nodded towards the door) somebody you take advantage of me and tell ME that you love me?”
“I did love you then and I DO love you now,” I assured her, “but, I didn’t want to hurt you when I married Tracey.
Then Tracey asks you to be a bridesmaid so I knew that She liked you too and wanted you to play a major part on our special day.
I thought it would make a very fitting end to our friendship.”
“I suppose once Tracey was married and away from her parents THAT would have been the best time for thinking about adoption, but it hadn’t occurred to me then and probably wouldn’t ever have.
What I told you at the play-park on the way home from Sandra’s party was all true.
I HAD fallen deeply in love with you but I am a coward and I didn’t want to hurt Tracey either, so I was prepared to forsake my love for you and be happy just to be your best-friend.”
Tears were streaming from her eyes.
“It is important that we don’t have any secrets.” I assured her.
“Well” She sighed, “I think it is only fair to warn you that I have a problem.”
Tears were beginning to trickle from my eyes.
“I already know.” I assured her.
“You know about what I have been through?” She sounded surprised.
“Yes I do – Lynda told me.”
“Why would Lynda tell you about me?” Surprise was turning to shock.
“Because Lynda knew something that nobody else knew.”
At the foot of Debbie’s bed there was a chest-of-drawers with a box of brightly-coloured handkerchiefs upon it. Debbie’s right hand located the box and she offered me a tissue then took a few for herself.
“I said somebody (I nodded door-ward) was the second person - so who was the first?”
“Ah,” I was silent as she continued, “The one you promised Lynda about?”
“I don’t want you to get upset,” I confessed. Debbie assured me she would not.
“The only other person I have slept with since moving here was…You.”
“ME!” she was shocked.
“The night before your banking exam in May,” I assured her, “That’s when I knew I was deeply in love with you and had to promise Lynda not to tell Tracey.”
Debbie became very sombre and subdued as I confessed about my night with her.
“What I don’t get,” she sniffed, “I understand why you wouldn’t want Tracey to know, but why tell Lynda?”
“I didn’t tell Lynda.” I assured her,
“Lynda overheard and threatened to tell Tracey and Marcie and both would have thrown me into the street. I had to promise never to make love to you ever again to stop Lynda telling on me.”
“But, I know nothing of this.” she concluded.
“I will have to sleep on this - I’ve got a lot to think about.”
“I will understand, my darling,
If you tell me tomorrow to get on my bike and leave you alone - I shall.
If you think we should never get married - then I shall accept that too.
In a few weeks you will be gone from here – in a few weeks I also will be gone from here.
If you want to postpone the wedding until next September - or whenever - then we shall.
You sleep on it and whatever you wan
t - you shall have.”
“Okay?” She agreed.
I professed my undying love for her and kissed her tenderly.
Then making sure she was okay I left her with her doubts to adjourn to my own room to spend a very uncomfortable night with doubts of my own.
It would appear the jury was still out and I would have to await ‘the verdict.’
My fate was in Debbie’s hands.