"Lily, would you just go and take these to Mrs Andrews, Mrs Kelsey, Bobby's mom, Mrs Stevens and Kaitlyn's mom please." Mom didn't have an invitation for Mrs Anderson and Betty. They were both in their mid-eighties. Somehow, I think pretty knickers and matching lace bras were the last thing on their minds.
"So you're not inviting Mrs Big Bum?"
"No, Mrs Big Bum is away and would you stop calling her that. Why would you call her such a name?"
"Because that's what Dad calls her and because she has a big bum."
"GO!" She handed me the red envelopes that were bordered in black lace, as a sneaky, little giggle escaped from the corner of her mouth.
When I knocked on Kaitlyn's door, she answered in her pj's. She had cute pink boxers on with a short white singlet top in a pink marshmallow design. I looked down at her feet that were covered in two big balls of pink, furry fluff. "Cute slippers," I said, trying to think of something to say.
She was a little embarrassed but at least this time she spoke to me.
"Hi Lily. How are you going?"
"Hi Kaitlyn. Can you give this to your mom please?"
"Sure."
"Thanks. See you later then. Might see you at school."
"Sure." She started to close the door slowly as I walked down the driveway. "Lily," she called out after me. I turned around. "Doesn't matter," she said quietly and closed the door swiftly.
Sometimes I wished so badly that mind reading was one of my powers. It would come in very handy at times. I really wanted to know what she was thinking at that moment when she called out my name, and I was determined to find out, even if I had to stalk her.
7. The 12 year old Stalker
I was determined to find out what was going on. I became obsessed. I was like a mouse sniffing out a piece of Swiss cheese in the dungeons of a mansion. I was like a dog drawn to a chicken liver on the bench top, a cat standing in front of a gold fish bowl. I was like Tiffany searching for her bottle of fake tan. If there was something to be found, I was going to find it.
Because Kaitlyn was in the eighth grade, we didn't always hang out in the same places, so I had to use my psychic skills to find out where she was and what she was doing. Actually at times I did begin to feel a bit like a stalker. Everywhere Kaitlyn was, there I was; one step behind her. Sometimes I felt like grabbing a microphone and singing that old song, 'every breath you take, every step you make, I'll be watching you.'
My dad always said I was like a sniffer dog. If there was a bone to be found, I would find it. Sometimes he was truly amazed at how clever I could be. Oh if only he knew!
If I was within a five metre radius I could hear what Kaitlyn was talking about, but only her. As she was my target for my psychic and intuitive powers, I could zone in with my tympanic radar and know what she was saying without actually hearing the words. But only her. I couldn't comprehend what the others were saying unless I was actually close enough to eavesdrop on them. But that would look a little bit obvious; a seventh grader lurking around a circle of eighth graders with one ear sticking up into the air trying to catch their conversation.
No matter how many conversations I snooped on, how many times I spied on her at school and in the street, I could find nothing; no dirt on anything or anyone. There was nothing suspicious, evil, cunning or conniving in any of the conversations she had. There was just brain dead chatter about clothes, boys, jewellery, Instagram, sleepovers, boys, makeup, loom bands, video star, iTunes, boys, boys and more talk about boys. They were boy mad in case you hadn't realised.
Mishy and Maddy started to catch on to me and were beginning to get sus about why I would suddenly take off and have to find Kaitlyn, and why I always had to go to the bath room so often. Then I started going to the water fountain and the library all the time. Man! I've never pretended to read so many books. I used to say I was going to the library but then I would forget to bring back a book. But I definitely drew the line at pretending I was going to the chess club. That would be so uncool. And they would see right through me anyway.
It was beginning to get exhausting and boring. It was like having a fulltime job as a spy and being a student all at the same time. Plus I was running out of excuses to keep nicking off. I had just about given up and admitted that I was wrong. I had to concede to the real possibility that I had only imagined that Kaitlyn had a real problem in desperate need of my professional services. I was about to throw in the towel when I discovered something very interesting, and I wasn't even looking at the time.
Thursday 30th October
Dear Debbie.
I'm sitting here in my bedroom supposed to be doing homework. At least that's what Mom thinks I'm doing. But I'm just not in the mood. I'm just not focused, and seriously, sometimes you just can't get motivated to work out what x divided by y is when the value of p = 6 and the square root of 9 is equal to k and it's all really poo anyway. I hate Algebra. I mean I HATE ALGEBRA!!!! I don't know anyone that likes it and I don't know how it's going to help me get along in this world anyway. Why can't they just tell us the value of x, then the sum would be much easier instead of being so secretive about it?
Anyway putting all that boring Math's hogwash aside, I heard some interesting stuff tonight at basketball. Mom made us all go and watch Dopey Dan play because it was a quarter final. Josh (my coach's assistant) was filling in for Dan's team, so it made it a little bit more interesting. He's such a nice guy. But you'll never believe who was there watching; Tiffany and her ladies in waiting. I think Tiffany's brother plays in the team they were competing against, and of course Krystal is Josh's girlfriend. I'm still flabbergasted about that one.
I even went up and said hi to them in my sickliest, sweetest voice just because I know it annoys them. Everyone knows the fact that they HATE the seventh graders and they always try and ignore us. (Probably because we have more brains in one of us than they have all put together.)
Anyway I don't care what they think of me, cool or uncool, I can't stand rudeness so I always say hi.
So this is the low down Debbie.
After they gave me a little fake hi and a few little smirks and whispers to themselves, I continued walking to the caf? to get my hot chips. (YUM! That's the sole reason I go to basketball.)
On the way back they were heavily engrossed in a conversation and it was definitely about another girl. And I have to say dear Debbie, certain things I could hear didn't give me the feeling that they were being overly complimentary or nice about this girl. And the things they said that they were going to do to her!!!
Who were they talking about Diary? Could it be??.? No, surely not. She's one of their BFF's!
Gotta go, Mom's coming. Aghhhhhhh!
8. My New Boyfriend
I couldn't wait for Monday to arrive to seek out answers and solve the case of the mysterious eighth grader. I had briefly seen Kaitlyn from a distance on Friday but she was going to Tiffany's for a sleepover party and was frantically discussing and preparing so I didn't interrupt her.
On Sunday my patience wore thin waiting for the Monday to arrive, so I decided to get a little head start. I had nothing in particular to do with my family that day, so I summoned up a little witchcraft to give me a helping hand to start my Kaitlyn research. I told Mom I was going out to feed the chooks.
"We don't have any chooks darling."
"Yeah I know, so I might be gone for quite a while looking for them," I replied.
"What are you going on about this time Lily? You say the most ridiculous things sometimes." ME? OMG! If Mom could hear herself talk. She's the one who says the most ridiculous things, not sometimes, but ALL THE TIME!
"Nothing, I'm just going for a ride on my broo??BIKE!"
I quickly ran outside and down the street into the vacant block of land. It was densely covered with bushes and fallen trees giving me the perfect opportunity to 'disappear' when I needed to. I sat down behind a tree and chanted.
Give me
strength
Give me power
Take me where
The road is sour
Find the one
Who needs me most
Search the land
Search the coast
I began to feel hazy and light-headed. My eyes were blurry and before I knew it, I had transported to Kaitlyn's backyard under her window. I couldn't see in because the blinds were drawn, but I could hear gloomy music playing, and muffled sounds of sobbing echoed through the window. I thought back to the Friday before and remembered Kaitlyn being so excited about the sleepover at Tiffany's on Saturday. She couldn't stop talking about it, so I wondered why she was home this early on the Sunday. When I go to a sleep over, I don't usually go home until Mom drags me out kicking and screaming late in the day.
I wondered how I could confront Kaitlyn without it seeming too weird or obvious. I could knock on the front door and ask if she wanted to come out and play with me but that would sound too babyish. I could say my Mom wanted to borrow a cup of sugar, but that would seem ridiculous considering we have about five houses between us.
Then the perfect idea hit me. I could pretend to be looking for my lost cat. I was just about to run around to the front of their house when I heard a lawnmower starting from the side, and the sound was fast approaching and getting closer. I scanned the backyard for a quick hideout and dove head first into the dog kennel, right into a bowl full of mushy dog food and a half eaten, saliva smeared teddy bear staring helplessly back at me.
And that's where I stayed for what seemed like an eternity, but was probably more like half an hour while Kaitlyn's dad mowed the back lawn. And I've got to say, the smell of freshly cut grass isn't so good when you've got dog food stuck up your left nostril. I thought of using a spell to get me out of there but I only have so many non -emergency type spells to use and I didn't want to waste one.
After Kaitlyn's dad had finished and gone, I crawled out of the kennel on my hands and knees only to come face to face with a ferocious looking animal with gooey saliva dripping from its jowls. He started to growl menacingly at me, and the more he growled, the more saliva that frothed from his mouth bubbling and dripping until it plopped revoltingly onto the ground.
"Good doggie, good boy, go away," I whispered. "I promise I didn't eat your din dins."
Then the growl turned into a snort, and he started sniffing the air and panting round my face.
"Go away!" I was trying so hard to be commanding in quiet tones. Then the most horrendous thing happened, imprinting a memory that will scar my mental being for life.
As I was trying to get up, the ferocious looking dog took one large leap into the air, bowled me over, wrestled me to the ground, and started licking me all over the face. Then, OMG, then it started humping my leg. I was so embarrassed. I'm still embarrassed just thinking about it.
"Aghhhhh, get off!" I screamed. "Get off you big dumb animal." But my screams fell on deaf floppy ears as the ginormous tongue kept slobbering all over my face.
"BONGO, GET OFF!" yelled a voice from inside the house. It must have been my fairy god mother (or my hairy Godmother) come to my rescue, because 'Bongo' got off my leg, and after one last slurp, pulled his tongue back in and ran to the door as Kaitlyn came out. She had a look of astonishment on her face, and I had saliva all over mine.
"Lily? Is that you? What are you doing here? And more to the point, what are you doing in Bongo's kennel?"
Think quick Lily, think quick, I thought to myself.
"Ahh?. my cat, my cat ran into your back yard. I came looking for Sirpuss and your ferocious bull terrier backed me into a corner and I had nowhere else to go but the kennel. I'm so sorry."
"No, I'm sorry. Good boy Bongo." She turned to the monstrous looking animal and patted him.
"GOOD BOY?" I exclaimed. "He nearly ate me for his dinner, not to mention doing other unmentionable things. You should keep savage animals like that tied up," I laughed, trying to lighten my grumpiness. My heart was still panting with fear and with being caught.
"Lily, he's just a dumb old Labrador. They're like teddy bears with four legs. I'm really sorry about that but Dad is trying to train him to be a watch dog and he just licks everyone to death. So he's only doing his job. Would you like a towel? You've got goo all over your face, brown stuff and gooey white bits."
"That would be your dog's breakfast I think."
"Ahh that's what I can smell." She screwed up her nose in mock disgust.
"Yes a towel would be great thank you." All I wanted to do was go home and have a hot bath full of disinfectant, but I didn't want to miss the golden opportunity to quiz Kaitlyn. I couldn't help but notice she looked miserable again. Her eyes were puffy and red and she was still in her pyjamas.
"Do you want to come in for a minute, or do you want to stay out here with your new boyfriend?" She laughed at her joke and it was nice to see her smile." So I was now invited into the house. This was getting better and better by the minute. Maybe being smothered in dog spit and dog food will have been worth the agony after all.
"Sure, if that's ok with your parents."
"Yeah, it won't worry them," she said opening the door and motioning to Bongo with her hand to back off, as he tried to slime his way round her legs.
"Sit down. Would you like a drink?"
"Ok that would be great." Anything to get the taste of dog food out of my mouth. Kaitlyn handed me a towel and a face washer. She was really quite thoughtful. It puzzled me why she hung around with Tiffany and Krystal.
"So where do you think he went?" Kaitlyn asked.
"Who?"
"Your cat!"
"He's probably at ho?..I mean, I'm hoping he probably went home by now. Because I couldn't see him anywhere. I'm hoping your dog scared him off."
"Yes well, sorry about that again. He gets a little bit excited at times."
"So Kaitlyn, how was your sleepover last night? Wasn't it last night you were going to Tiffany's? You're back pretty early."
Kaitlyn looked down towards the ground. "Oh that, it got cancelled."
"Oh what a shame, you were really looking forward to it."
"It was just a dumb old sleep over, no biggie," she said with a laugh that I suspect was laced with fakeness. "I had a much better night here anyway. Sooo? how did you know about the sleepover?" She looked at me quizzically.
"You were talking about it on Friday remember. You said you had new pj's to wear and two bags of candy to bring."
"Really? I can't remember talking to you about it."
GULP
BIG BOO BOO. Stupid me!
I recalled I hadn't been talking to Kaitlyn about the sleepover. It was one of the times I had hunted Kaitlyn down and zoomed in with my tympanic radar and listened to the conversation. She was talking with Krystal about what they would bring for the midnight snack. I had thought it was part of the conversation I had with her that day.
Only one thing to do to get out of this one.
LIE!
"Sure you did, on Friday, we were talking out front of the gym."
NEXT: CHANGE THE SUBJECT QUICK!
"Anyway, I guess Tiffany will be organising a different night real soon and you'll be able to eat all the candy then."
"I guess," she said with a hint of uncertainty, and I thought I saw her eyes glaze over.
"Kaitlyn, are you ok?"
She stared at me for an uncomfortable moment. I think she was sizing up my trustworthy factor. I wanted to tell her that I was here for her, that it was my mission in life to save her from the evils that lurked, and that everything would be ok if only she would let me help. But I couldn't because that familiar eye-watering, mind numbing, fuzzy feeling washed over my head as my senses began to heighten and the need to save overwhelmed me.
I scrambled out of the chair knocking it flying and burst through the front door. In a split second, I landed in the front yard and screamed in a high pitched shrill, "GET OUT OF THE WAY. Get out of the way!" And I leap
t into the air pushing Kaitlyn's dad so he became airborne, flying through the air and landing on the ground feet first, just as a massive tree branch fell where he had been standing. He looked stunned. We both looked at each other and then turned to look at the monstrous tree on the ground.
"I don't know who you are young lady, or where you came from, but I think you just saved my life."
"I'm your neighbor."
"And she's my friend Dad," Kaitlyn had followed me out the front and had arrived just in time to witness the event. "I don't know how you heard that tree crashing Lily, but you acted so quickly. I think you did save Dad's life. It's like a miracle how you did it."
She called me her friend.
She turned to her father. "Dad, you could have been killed. What were you doing? You are so dangerous with that thing." She pointed to the threatening power tool that had been flung to the ground and burst into tears.
"Kaitlyn, it's ok honey. I'm alright. Your friend saved me. It was almost magical the way you appeared. Are you sure you're not my fairy god mother?" he chuckled as he wiped the sweat off his brow. "Take your friend inside and give her a chocolate bar. In fact give her 100 chocolate bars."
"Oh that's ok, I'm fine." I waited for Kaitlyn's response. I was so close to finding out stuff before her dad decided to go running loose with a chainsaw. Such bad timing.
"Lily, I really have to go and work on a Math's assignment. I hope you find your cat."
"What!"
"Your cat, I hope he turns up." I had forgotten all about my little white lie with all the action. "And thanks again for saving Dad." Kaitlyn ran inside holding back tears, and that was that. What was going down with that girl?
9. Football hero
As I left Kaitlyn's house and started walking down the street, a bike rider came zooming down the road. As he came closer, it became clearer to me who it was, and my cheeks started to burn so fiercely I could have boiled an egg on them. My heart started to beat irregularly. I couldn't believe it. I was wearing my daggiest shorts, a stained t-shirt dripping with gooey bits of dog food, and my hair resembled a bird's nest ravaged by a tornado.