Chapter Twenty-two
I awoke in my bed covered in a cold sweat. I cast about the dimly lit room. Someone had carried me to my chambers after I collapsed. I sat up, and my head swam. Adair had killed his uncle. I had to warn someone, but who? I realized, too late, all my allies were out of reach. There was no one left to turn to, except for the queen. I jumped out of bed, not even taking the time to change. I merely threw a coat over my dressing gown.
I burst out of my chamber room. Night had fallen, and long shadows crowded the halls. Lanterns flickered in their holders, burned low on the wick. The hour must be well past midnight. I padded down the corridor, my bare feet slapping upon the stones. My heart hammered in my chest as I wended my way, drawing ever closer to the inner courtyard of the royal family. I peered about for a guard, a servant, anyone I could ask for help. I found no one and made my way towards the center of the palace.
Down the hall, I spotted a pair of guards standing sentry before the entry leading towards Adair’s and, I hoped, Queen Idella’s quarters. I hurried towards them, and they blocked my path by jutting out their decorative spears.
“Halt,” one of them said.
Heedless of the sharp object pointed at my breast, I drew in as close to them as it would allow and said, “I need to speak with the queen.”
“At this hour? Are you mad?” He looked me up and down from my bare feet to my housecoat and dressing gown. I am certain I looked mad.
“It’s very urgent. She will want to speak with me. Tell her Lady Diranel wishes an audience with her.”
It was a dangerous gambit, but I dared not reveal the full extent of my knowledge lest the guards betray me. I was uncertain who was an ally and who a foe.
They both eyed me suspiciously. The first one to speak signaled to the second, and they drew away and conferred in heated whispers. I paced the hall as they did so, my mind concocting a secondary plan if they refused me an audience. I considered contacting Duke Magdale, but he did not maintain quarters in the palace. I would have to leave the palace to get to him. It was an unlikely choice.
They finished their debate, and the first guard said, “Wait here,” before striding down the hall towards the royal chambers.
I continued to pace, wringing my hands as I did so. I considered confiding in the guard remaining. I should sound the alarm. Perhaps if I went to him now, the king’s life would yet be spared. I stopped pacing to face the guard.
“How much longer? It is very important that I speak with the queen immediately.”
The guard eyed me up and down. He had no reason to trust me, just as I had no reason to trust him.
“Shouldn’t be too much longer,” he said and folded his arms over his chest and squared his feet. His message was clear: he would not let me pass.
“The—” I began, but the other guard had returned with a second man in tow. He wore his nightclothes, and a chain was haphazardly placed around his neck. I assumed him to be a member of the queen’s household, though in the dim light I could not get a clear sight of the seal on his chain.
“Come with me. Her Majesty will see you in her chambers,” the new man said. He frowned at me, and I was given the impression he was not pleased to have been woken in the middle of the night. Had I been a clever woman, I would have requested to have the queen come to me, but I did not and followed the stranger instead.
“Thank you, sir, you are most gracious.” I bobbed a bow out of habit and followed him down the hall.
He walked before me at a brisk pace, and instead of heading towards the royal chambers, he opened a hidden door behind a tapestry hung on a wall.
“After you, my lady.” He motioned for me to enter.
The hairs on the back of my neck prickled. Why not take me to her front door? I voiced my concern to the man. “Does the queen not stay near the rest of the royal family?” I asked.
“Her Majesty prefers her privacy. She requested you come through a secret passage,” the man replied.
I glanced back towards the guards. They watched me, both with furrowed brows. Torn between fleeing in hopes of finding another way and the uncertain path, I decided to follow him.
He led me down a dark hallway. He removed a candle from a niche nearby, and the pale light illuminated our path. The rough chiseled walls, cobwebs gathering along the ceiling, and damp smell made me wonder how often this passageway was used. We continued in silence, and I was hard put to repress the growing feeling of unease. Every moment wasted, the king drew a step closer to death and Adair closer to winning his long-game plans. Plans I, as his pawn, had helped come to fruition. I ignored the bitter thought, but it reared its ugly head more than once during that short trip.
The hall ended at a wooden door. The man opened the door for me and stepped aside. Inside, lanterns had been lit and illuminated the room. I spied the corner of a table and a chair but not much else.
“Here you are, my lady,” he said without meeting my gaze.
“The queen is inside?” I asked.
He nodded and motioned once more for me to enter. I stepped inside, and the door slammed shut behind me. Footsteps shifting across the floor revealed that I was not alone. I whirled around and came face to face with the room’s other occupant, and my stomach dropped.
“Maea, you seem disappointed?” Adair purred.
“What are you doing here?” I took a step back, and my back pressed against the door. I searched for the knob and found it locked.
Adair smirked. “I don’t think you’re in a position to be asking questions, Maea.”
How long ago had he killed his uncle in cold blood? Did anyone know? Did anyone suspect? I could feel myself blanching.
We were alone. He took a step towards me, and I paced to the opposite end of the room from him. I was determined to keep as much space between us as possible. Just looking at Adair, I could see King Dallin’s death gaze reflected in his eyes. I shuddered involuntarily.
“What are you doing up at this hour of the night?” he asked as he leaned casually against the table.
I would not meet his gaze. How could he act as if he had not just killed a man in cold blood! “I could not sleep,” I lied. My hands shook, and I thanked the Goddess my voice did not follow suit.
“And you thought to have a chat with the queen in the middle of the night?”
I clutched my shaking hands into fists. There was no use hiding the truth. He would find out in the end anyways, if he had not figured it out already. “Yes, I know what you did. I saw you kill your uncle, King Dallin.”
His expression did not change. “I suspected you knew as much. I should have known when you collapsed at the hand fasting that certain unpleasantness might be revealed.”
He smiled, and it made me feel ill. Had I really once hoped for that smile? Now when I looked into his eyes I saw a conniving murderer.
“You are quick on the uptake,” I said snidely. “I am surprised how quickly you will turn on an ally once they are no longer of use to you.”
Perhaps if I could keep him talking, someone would discover King Dallin’s body and sound the alarm though I feared my prospects locked in this room with the murderer.
Adair also showed no signs of the deed on his person. He must have disposed of his soiled garments already.
“It’s so unlike you to be cruel, Maea. It does not suit you at all.”
I glared at him.
He took a seat in the chair and propped his feet up on the table. “Don’t give me that look. I never pretended to be without faults.”
“Which makes it fair that you killed the king? Why kill him? Because he sought to disinherit you? Does that truly warrant murder?”
“Now that is a complicated question. My uncle was very traditional, you see. He saw things a certain way. Like his uncle and his uncle before him, he chose his sister’s son as his heir. But the winds of change have come to Danhad, and his progressive queen’s whispers got the better of him.”
“What do you mean?”
Despite my revulsion, I was curious.
He sighed dramatically. “I guess it’s time you knew all of it, Maea. I have been planning Sabine’s and my marriage for quite some time. With the Order’s and your help, we finally reached our goals.”
I felt as if I was going to be sick. He used me! “You said the Order fought for the greater good, not politicking!”
“And what greater good can there be than universal harmony between our two countries?” He planted his feet on the ground and stared at me.
I wanted to weep from frustration. Everything I knew about Adair was a lie. I grasped for a reason to shout at him. “So you killed your uncle to marry Sabine, why?” I pointed an accusing finger at him.
“Well, he was not so keen on the idea. He did agree in the end, but there were whispers of a change in succession. He did not like the idea of a Neaux queen. I had to sacrifice the pawn, as it were, before he ruined everything I have worked for.”
Damara wanted to put Layton on the throne instead of Adair, and now I knew why: to prevent this, to prevent Adair from taking the throne. The prophecy had been set in motion, and I had been too blind to stop it. I drew back. How had I not seen how ruthless he was? Because I was blinded by his charm, I berated myself.
“How can you be certain the people will accept your queen? They have not forgotten the war.”
“I am sure, but if we were to obtain the rich lands and trading Neaux has to offer with the security of a male heir.”
He was after Neaux all along. Sabine’s father had no male heir. Their son by Neaux succession would be third in line to the throne, after Sabine’s uncle, Sarelle’s former intended. “You plan to take Neaux using Sabine; is that why you had Sarelle killed? This will never work. You’ll start an uprising or even another war!”
He laughed. “Do you truly think me that crass? Honestly, I thought you knew me better than that, Maea.”
I shuddered at the sound of my name on his lips. Even now, after everything I knew, he still had that kind of effect on me.
“I thought you were better than this,” I said.
He stood up and strode over to me. I backed away, but he captured me around the waist.
“You knew what I was, Maea. I’ve never pretended to be anything I am not. I have always been honest.”
I squirmed in his grasp, but he only tightened his grip.
“You tricked me,” I spat.
“I let you believe what you wanted. If you did not know what my goals were, then you should have asked.”
I damned his logic, but it did not justify his actions and I told him as much. “Not lying to me does not justify murder!”
“And does the life of two equal one, Maea? What about thousands? Because if we are going to point fingers, neither your hands nor my uncle’s are clean.”
I blanched at the memory of Count Braun’s glare as they tied him to the executioner’s block. Adair had struck me in an unhealed wound. “I didn’t kill Count Braun with my own hand!”
“No. But you were the direct cause, and what about Damara and Johai? Their lives are forfeit should they step foot in Danhad, and Layton has been banished from court. How can you claim innocence when so many lives have been ruined because of you? My uncle ordered thousands of men to their deaths, and you think his death was not justified?”
Despite my resistance, his words were like a spell, and I began to doubt my conviction. He was right, a part of me thought, I was no innocent. I had ruined so many lives in my selfish quest to regain my memories, and for what? Johai was banished, and I had not prevented the marriage I had set out to prevent.
Then I thought of Johai and all of the sacrifices he had made, for my sake, and everything came into focus. I pushed Adair on the chest. He seemed unprepared for the action because he stumbled back a step, giving me enough time to put distance between us and face him, shoulders squared.
“Tell me one thing, Adair, why kill him by your hand? Surely you could have someone else do the dirty work.”
“Ah, now that will have to wait until I know where your allegiances lie.”
The smile that curled his lips said it all: he wished for me to condone what he had done. He had deceived me and used my abilities to meet his own ends, and he expected me to look the other way. I had nearly done just that, intoxicated by his sweet charms once again.
“You want me to overlook the king’s murder while you deceive the nations and take control?”
“You always were clever, Maea.” He strode over to me again. I backed into the wall, and he smiled dangerously. “I meant what I said before. I care for you deeply, and I would take good care of you. It is not unheard of for a king to keep a mistress. It is essential that Sabine gives me an heir, but you and I… we could have fun together.”
I could not express my revulsion properly in words. I spat in his face.
He stepped back and wiped the spittle from his face. “I take it you are adverse to the idea.”
“What would make you think that I would desire to be the concubine of a murdering snake!”
“I do not think you understand the consequences of your decision. Either you are for me or against me, Maea.”
There was finality in his tone, and we both knew it. I stood as straight as possible and said, “I would rather die than let you deceive everyone this way.”
I flattened myself against the wall as he leaned in close. I could nearly smell the iron scent of blood on him as he grabbed my chin and upturned my face, forcing me to look him in the eye. Adair’s hand slid down to my throat. I grabbed his wrist and tried to push him off me, but he was prepared this time, and he tightened his grip.
“If that is what you wish, I could kill you now. No one would ask questions. My people love me beyond doubt.”
He tightened his grip upon my windpipe further, and I gasped for breath. I struck him blindly, my fists landing on his arms, and one shot to his cheek. He did not relent. Stars burst behind my eyes as the world swayed. My movements were sluggish, and I struggled to keep my arms up, let alone strike him. This could not be where it ended, not now, not after I had risked it all. It was getting harder and harder to breathe, and each gasp stole a little more of my breath from my lungs.
Adair slackened just a minute amount. “Don’t worry, I won’t kill you, but by the time I’m done, you’ll wish I had.”
Then everything went black.