Double-Dog Dare
Rick Ready
Copyright 2011 Rick Ready
“Grandpa? Can I talk to you about something?”
I looked at the boy, so much like his daddy at that age, yet blessed with his mother’s kind eyes. I rocked the porch swing, sipped my sweet tea, and observed his body language. Left leg crossed over right as he sat in the chair facing me. Right foot tapping the gray-painted deck, the Nike swoosh keeping time with a silent song known only to the aged wood, a sign of nervousness in the confusing time of curiosity and changing emotions. The hesitancy of asking questions, fearing laughter and possible ridicule, not wanting mom and dad to know you have a million questions, wondering if there’s anyone you can trust. Twelve is a difficult time for young boys and girls. Their bodies are changing, marching toward adulthood, sometimes too fast. Hormones begin emerging, often leaving embarrassing reminders. Shocking thoughts add to the growing confusion and make you wonder if you’re brain damaged. I realized how hard this was for him. I’d been there once myself.
“You can talk to me about anything, Larry. What’s on your mind?”
He stared at me for a few seconds, struggling to make the final leap. I sensed his discomfort but knew he had to make the choice. Part of growing up is getting past the fear.
“Jerry Wayne and Steve are calling me Yella Boy.”
“Yella as in yellow?”
“Yeah.”
“Wanna try again, Larry?”
Larry’s eyes widened. “Sorry, Grandpa. Yes sir.”
I nodded to him. Part of growing up is forgetting to be respectful. Larry was a good kid, not perfect, but already showing the values his mom and dad had taught him. I’d noticed he was introspective and often thought about his answer before giving it. I knew this would serve him well when the days of childhood ended and the pressures of adulthood began.
“I take it being called Yella Boy bothers you.”
“Yes sir, it does.” His jaw jutted out and his nose flared. I liked the intensity in his eyes. “And some of the other kids are starting to laugh at me.”
“Why are they calling you names?”
“’Cause they double-dog dared me to do something and I wouldn’t do it! They double-dog dared me, Grandpa! You can’t let a double-dog dare go by! I’ll be branded for the rest of my life!”
I wanted to smile but knew it would be wrong. No matter what your age, if it’s serious to you then it should be treated as such by everyone. And this was serious to Larry.
“Ah, the dreaded double-dog dare.” I pursed my lips and shook my head. “A dare is one thing. Most of the time you can get away with not doing it. But a double-dog dare! Whoa! You gotta take care of it.”
“I knew you’d understand! Gosh, what am I going to do?”
“Depends, Larry. Is it dangerous?”
He paused and thought about it. “I don’t think so, but it could be.”
“Is it something you want to do?”
He dropped his eyes and I watched the color rush to his cheeks. As his face reddened I knew it had something to do with a girl. His foot began tapping the wood again, this time faster as though the silent music raced to a crescendo. I almost felt his thoughts battling through the questions: Should I tell him? Will he laugh? Will he tell mom and dad? Maybe I should just say forget it. Then his gray-blue eyes bored into me.
“I’m not sure. Part of me wants to and part of me is scared to.”
Okay, he’s got to get this out in his own way. Don’t push. Just prod a little. I cocked an eye at him.
“What would you really like to do?”
“I’d like to beat the crap out of Jerry Wayne and Steve! That’s what I’d like to do!” he blurted out.
“I see.” Time for a lesson, grandpa to grandson. “Violence rarely solves a problem, Larry. Any matter solved in such a manner usually surfaces again. It’s normal to have feelings of anger, and even revenge. But a man reasons through those feelings and realizes there has to be a better solution. I’m curious, though. If you feel this way, why didn’t you take action?”
He looked sheepish, then grinned. “Steve’s bigger than me and Jerry Wayne’s stronger. I figured I’d be the one losing those fights and I’d still be called Yella Boy.”
I laughed, then reached out and patted his shoulder. “See? You reasoned your way through this. Good for you.”
“But I still don’t like being called names.”
I nodded again. Perhaps it was time to prod. “Maybe you’d better tell me about the dare.”
“It wasn’t a dare! It was a double-dog dare! And I don’t know what to do!”
“Gotcha. Now tell me about it and maybe the two of us can figure out a solution.”
Larry uncrossed his legs, leaned forward, and took a deep breath. He closed his eyes for a moment and then the words rushed out.
“They double-dog dared me to kiss Susan! On the lips! In the classroom in front of everybody!”
I had to bite my upper lip. Sometimes grandpas aren’t supposed to laugh. To give myself a moment, I glanced toward the screen door. My wife stared at me, a big grin covering the face of the woman I loved more than life. Then she winked at me. I looked back at Larry. His eyes were wide and his color was almost back to normal.
“I don’t believe I know Susan. Does she have three eyes and dragon teeth?” I stole a look at my wife. She gave me a menacing look cautioning me to tread carefully. I winked at her, and she shook her head and smiled.
“No sir! She’s beautiful! I think she’s the prettiest girl in school!” Larry realized what he’d said, turned red again, and covered his mouth.
“I see. So, let me make sure I understand. You have a problem kissing a pretty girl. Or is it you have a problem kissing Susan?”
“I don’t want to be kissing any girl! But if I have to kiss one, I’d sure like it to be Susan.”
“Then why don’t you? Seems to me it would take care of the double-dog dare and Jerry Wayne and Steve wouldn’t call you Yella Boy anymore.”
“I don’t think she likes me, and if I tried to kiss her she might bite my lips off!”
Out of the corner of my eye I saw my wife’s hand cover her mouth. She didn’t want Larry to know she was there but she wasn’t going to miss the rest of this.
“What makes you think she would bite your lips off, Larry?”
“’Cause she told the whole class she’d bite my lips off if I tried to kiss her!”
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath to keep from laughing. When I opened them I saw my wife dabbing at her eyes. However, Larry was serious and I needed to be as well.
“Now we have a dilemma. What to do, what to do. Hmm. So, you’d like to kiss her but you’re afraid of her.”
“I’m not afraid of her! It’s … it’s just … I’m pretty sure she doesn’t like me.”
“What makes you think that?”
“Every time I’m around her she turns her head and ignores me. Sometimes, though, I catch her looking at me in the classroom. When I smile at her, she sticks her tongue out and makes faces at me!”
I paused for a few seconds. Now my wife had both hands over her mouth and her shoulders were shaking. I had to close my eyes again to keep from losing it. Breathe in, breathe out. When I achieved a modicum of composure I looked at Larry.
“You know, something like that happened to me once. As I recall, I was about your age. I was double-dog dared to kiss a girl too.”
“You were? What did you do?”
“Well, I had to ponder on it awhile. Dave and Henry were my two best friends but they could rile me up every now and then. Then they double-dog dared me to kiss Goldie Hutchinson. She was the prettiest girl in school. And popular? Whoa! Everybody wanted to be around G
oldie. Some of the kids gave her the nickname because she had golden hair that shined and a smile that made every boy blush. Everybody called her that until we got to high school. Then the teachers started calling her by her first name. Anyway, being around Goldie made me nervous. I didn’t understand until I was much older that it was because I really liked her. Just like Susan does to you, she always ignored me. She’d whisper to her girlfriends every time I got near and they’d all start laughing. Just being around her made me turn red and start stammering.
“Dave and Henry knew I liked Goldie and knew I was afraid of her. They didn’t call me Yella Boy but they did call me Puppy Love. Every time I walked near Goldie, they’d start yelling ‘Puppy Love!’ as loud as they could.”
“What did you do, Grandpa?”
“I thought about it for a while and finally decided I had to do something. A double-dog dare is serious. But you know that, don’t you?
Larry nodded. Now the story was about me and he was feeling much better. “Yes sir, I surely do.”
“I thought about it all weekend. When I went to school on Monday, I just stared at Goldie all first period. When the bell rang, I jumped up and walked over to Goldie’s desk. She looked up at me and said, ‘What do you want?’
“I didn’t say a word. I put my hands on her cheeks, leaned down, and kissed her on the lips.”
“No way!”
“I sure did, Larry.”
“What did she do?”
“The whole class started hooting and hollering. I turned around with a big grin and bowed to them. When I turned around to kiss her again Goldie stood up and slapped my face.”
“I bet that hurt! Did she try to bite your lips off, too?”
“No, and I didn’t feel the slap at all. All I remember feeling is the softness of her lips. And I knew right then I loved her.”
“What happened afterwards?”
“She continued to ignore me and make faces at me all through junior high and high school. Two months after graduation, we got married. And we’ve been together ever since.”
“That was Grandma?”
“Yes, Larry, that was your grandma, and the best thing I ever did was take a double-dog dare. Even if she hadn’t become my wife, at least I’d known what it was like to kiss her. And that memory belongs to me forever.”
Larry leaned back in the chair and placed his chin on his left palm. I’m sure thoughts raced through his mind as he thought about Susan. Then he stood and gave me a hug.
“Thanks, Grandpa, you’re the best.”
I hugged him back and kissed the top of his head. A moment of sadness pierced my heart as I thought we might never have a moment like this again.
“I gotta go. Mom’s fixing spaghetti tonight. And French bread, toasted with garlic on it. Tell Grandma I love her.”
Larry dashed off the porch, taking the steps two at a time. I watched him jog to the corner house and leap up the steps. Martha opened the screen door and moved to stand beside me. I took her hand as she leaned her head against my shoulder.
“You did well, old man.” I heard the catch in her voice. “It’s been a long time since you called me Goldie. And you know what, John? I never forgot that kiss either.”
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This is a work of fiction. I repeat, this is a work of fiction. I made it up. If you think it's about you, you're wrong. Names, characters, and incidents are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real, even though I know people with those names. Any resemblance to actual events, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
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