ee? You got another bitch pregnant how dare you? I accepted you being in the streets and hustling to provide for your family, but why do you insist on continuing to hurt me and your family?” my mother Emily said punching my father in his chest. “It’s not my baby that hoe fucked me Tom Tom, Jim, and Joe at the same damn time. She know like I know she’ll kill that little bitch ain’t no hoe fucking up my home?” My father said holding my mother face looking her in her eyes. “You mean to tell me four grown ass men’s is looking at three other dicks than their own? You really got to get yo shit and leave don’t you know that Joe was diagnosed with AIDS three fucking years ago? Did you use a fucking condom?” my mother yelled holding ha head fighting back tears. “Umm yea yea I did.” my father said looking more nervous than ever. “You lying son of a bitch get yo shit and get the fuck out I am going to the doctor first thing tomorrow morning you better pray I’m clean you dick in the booty ass nigga” my mother spit. I knew it was only a matter of time before things got real ugly real fast. Many people in the neighborhood assume that my father was an undercover punk but they knew better than to unpart their mouths because my father ran these streets and everybody that walked in them. I lean my head against the wall in the corner where I prayed at every night praying my father would return home safe, my mother would stop letting my father walk all over her, and that I would somehow escape all of this bullshit. People look at the glamorous things we have but one thing about life everything has a price tag on it even your life only me and my mother knows the hell that is paid to live this life. Now although my father wasn't abusive towards me, but the things he take my mother through affects me a lot he is showing me the type of man I will one day chose to accept in my life. Tears filled my eyes because before all of this we was actually a happy family and my mother was the exact definition of a strong black women. “The way you find a man is the same exact way you will lose them I name you Duchess for a reason you are royal and always first never last baby.” I could hear my mother telling me every day I would wake up with words of wisdom on my restroom door my mother gave me life and a purpose to want to wake up. Now all she is worried about is who my father is slanging his dick in. Don’t get me wrong my mother is every man’s dream caramel complexion hips and ass that would make any married man stray, make a faithful man want to go bad, and a gay man walk in a straight line she was what we called BAD. Her walk was not an act it was natural every step she took was flawless and the way her hips moved from side to side would make any blind man cry she was everything I wanted to be. Although we had money we never forgot where we came from or the people that was there for us when we was down and out, but some people you out grow. “Bitch what did you say to me? I told you that bitch lied she ain’t never see me in Pete fucking” my father bark. I tip to my door and look down the stairs to see my father giving my mother that “woman you better go ahead” stare” but knowing my mother she was not going to back down. “I am not going by what anyone told me I am going by what my own eyes seen. Three nights ago when you didn’t bring your sorry ass home like a dumb bitch I went looking for you and I found just what I was looking for. You and Pete was fucking and sharing blow jobs I was willing to accept yo gay ass because despite that I loved you, but now to find out that you might have AIDS you got to go and do not come back. I will serve you our divorce papers I am done me and Duchess is leaving you can have all this shit all them bitches and punk ass niggas we are done Duchess baby pack your shit we are out of here.” my mother said chucking my father the deuces. As much as I love my father I hated to see my mother lose herself in the process it was painful to watch. “You and my only child is not going anywhere I’ll stop it all just give me one more chance” my father said holding on to my mother’s arm. “What you men’s fail to realize is that every time a women comes back to you they are giving you another chance fifteen years I devoted my life to you, this house, your friends, the community, and your fucking trap houses did you notice I didn’t mention me or your daughter. I have lost myself and honestly I don’t know what me and Duchess is going to do, but something tells me we is going to be alright I will always love you but starting now it will be from a distance" my mother said. “You leave me then I am going to kill you me and Duchess” my father said walking to the closet where his choppa was. I could see the fear in my mother eyes but we both knew that my father loved us too much to kill us. “I am about to start packing me and Duchess things we’ll be out of here before you know it.” “Do not take another step or I will kill you I swear I will. You and Duchess is all I have I can’t lose ya’ll please do not make me do this” my father said crying shaking uncontrollably. “Pook one day you got to let these streets go and get yourself together it’s a lot of things I know, but I choose to remain silent and that silent has killed my pride, self-esteem, women worth, and my relationship with my child. I rather be dead than to spend another unhappy day with you. May God bless your heartless cold soul and may he bless mines for being afflicted in wrong doing. Put the gun down Pook and just let us go Duchess will always be in your life I am not taking her away from you.” “Yes you is you trying to hurt me aren’t you? You want to take everything away from me I won’t let you” my father said raising the gun to my mother’s chest. I felt the fear in my mother when you are close to someone how me and my mother was it was as if we had one body I started to cry and I watch tears fall down her cheeks. Even in pain my mother was still flawless she lowered her head turned around and headed towards the stairs. “Emily stop don’t you take another step I am serious I’ll shoot you” my father said crying even louder now. “Pook it’s over” was the last words my mother said before I watch her fall to the ground. “Mom” I yelled running down the stairs. “What did you do? Why did you do this?” I held my mother as I watch her take her last breathe “do you forgive me?” she ask. “Yes mommy please don’t go you all I have I have nobody else please don’t leave me.” I cried as she smiled and died in my hands nothing else in life seem to matter to me my only friend was taken from me by the hands of someone that was to protect us both. “Kill me what are you waiting on?” I said through tears. Walking away then turning back around my father shot me twice the bullet barely missed my chest. The burning sensation made everything around me slow down I just wanted to lay there and die, but something in me wouldn’t let me give up on myself. I crawled as fast as I could try to get to the house phone to call for help. Looking behind me I could tell that I was losing too much blood and it was only a matter of time before I pass out or die from blood loss. “911 what’s your emergency?” “My dad killed my mom and shot me twice I need help I’m dying please hurry.” “Okay ma'am what is your father name? “Clarence Wood but everyone calls him Pookie" was the last words I said before I pass out.
“She’s waking up.” I could hear people around me crying. “What the hell is going on I said to myself. Opening my eyes and quickly shutting them due to the bright lights in the room I tried to talk but felt something in my throat. I quickly open my eyes and seen the tube that was down my throat panicking I attempted to pull it out before all the doctor and nurses came charging at me tying my hands to the bed. Scared for my life, lost, confuses, and unable to ask questions I did what I was best at doing crying. “Calm down Duchess everything go be alright” my Big Mommy told me. Knowing that she would never lie to me reluctantly I stop fighting but I couldn’t stop shaking. “You're going to feel a little pressure but the less you move and fight the quicker this tube will be out your throat” the overweight doctor told me smiling his teeth reminded me of the Chiclet gum I knew for a fact he had overpaid some dentist for some bad dentures. I watch as they pulled the tube out of my throat as chunks of cold came out with the
tube. “I know your throat is sore so take it easy and try not to talk too much. Here’s a tablet and a pen you can communicate with your family through writing. I am going to give you and your love ones some time alone you’re one lucky girl Duchess you almost didn’t make it.” “She’s not lucky Doc she’s bless God has our back” Big Mommy said with the most genuine smile. The doctor nodded and walked out the room. “Praise him because he is worthy to be praised” my aunt Pam yelled getting ready to attempt to sing whatever song she claim was on her heart. “Hush up this child has been through enough and here you is playing with the Lord yet again sit down Pam. Now baby I know this is a lot for you to take in but you have been in a coma for six and a half months you witness your father murder your mother. Do you remember that?” I nodded my head as tears stream down my face. “It’s okay baby your father is still out here somewhere but do not worry about him he will get his in due