Chapter 44. Big Issue
- So let me get this straight. Daniella had a fit on the plane because she was getting closer to England?
-. Well…more like because she was getting closer to me, and I am her counterpart. Yes, I happened to be in England, but wherever I was, if she got too close to me, she’d start flipping out like that. Trust me, it took me long enough to get it straight in my own head
- So two counterparts can never meet each other?
- Exactly, yeah.
- Who designed it that way?
- Nobody designed it Adam; it’s just nature!
- It doesn’t sound very natural to me.
- That’s because the whole thing’s new to you now.
- Ok, so if Daniella was having fits on the plane, why weren’t you doing the same back at the Institution? I mean, she’s your counterpart, just like you are hers, right?
- I was. Exactly the same. And the closer she got, the worse the fits became. Nobody knew why it was happening to me at the time. They assumed it was a bad reaction to the drug trials. I thought I was dying Adam.
- Shit man!
For the first time since he’d known Kate, Adam was beginning to understand her. Each piece of her past fitted perfectly together to form the picture of what she was today. Moody, on-edge, evasive, bitter. It all made sense now he was learning the story behind her complex personality. He felt a wave of sympathy for her. And guilt. Lots of guilt. He’d always thought that he was the cheated one in their bizzare friendship. That he was somehow hard done by for how Kate pushed him away and snapped at him every time he tried to force-feed her a conspiracy theory. He now understood why she had hidden all this from him.
- You were right Katey.
- Right about what?
- Right to hide it from me. I mean…. there you were, out on your own, hiding all this hurt away. This whole story, keeping it to yourself. It must have been torture for you. And there was me, Mr Paranoid, banging on your door with my crazy ideas about government cover-ups and all that….
- They didn’t turn out to be such crazy ideas in the end though did they?
- I guess not….No.
The day had been well and truly swallowed by the night now. A quarter moon floated impossibly in the sky in front of them. Adam caught sight of his own breath lingering in the cold air in front of him. It reminded him of a puff off smoke and it was at that moment that he realised that he’d gone a long time without a cigarette. A slight nicotine pang teased his already over-occupied brain.
- Can I ask you something Katey?
Kate laughed at the pointless question.
- Ask me something? Isn’t that what you’ve been doing all day? It’s a bit late for niceties now, isn’t it?
- Why didn’t you just turn away from me? When I was pestering you back at the Institution. I mean…. I could tell you were annoyed by me. But if you were battling these demons and I was just making it all worse by pushing you for answers, why did you keep on being my friend?
Kate stared out at the passing cars, as they pulled away from the traffic lights. Each driver just one wrong move away from killing themselves and their counterpart on the other side of the world. The way that Andrea’s mining accident made Harry fall to his death off the top bunk back at the Institution. The way that Kate’s own suicide would have killed poor Daniella. The way that by killing Lionel Martinez, the powers-that-be would be killing Adam too. She wondered how much of her fear was to do with the fact that she didn’t want to be with Adam when he died. It was selfish, but it was also partly true.
- Because you didn’t ask for any of this Adam. Just like I didn’t. Just like nobody back at that hell hole asked for any of this. And….
She hesitated, as she scanned Adam’s eyes. Double checking that he was worthy of this next compliment.
-….And because I do actually like you Adam.
Flattering as that was, Adam had no time to dwell on it. He had a decision to make: Try his luck out in the big wide world and take his chances that what everything Kate was saying about them killing him by killing his counterpart was in fact a load of nonsense, or go back to an Institution that he was genuinely terrified of and face the wrath of the powers-that-be for causing them so much trouble by escaping. His fear was that they’d probably kill him either way. To decide, Adam needed to hear more, but to hear more would take time, and if he took too much time, the decision might end up being taken out of his hands.
Adam threw his head back, exhaling a long breath towards the deep blue night sky, as if it were his offering to the stars in return for salvation.
- I like you too Katey, which is why I find it hard to think you’d make any of this up, but you must see how crazy it all still sounds from my side.
- I do, Adam. Believe me, I do.
Kate bowed her head. Almost appearing ashamed, as if the whole concept of counterparts, of Ducie, of everything that had caused this mess was her idea in the first place. It wasn’t of course.
- Answer me something Katey.
Adam shook his index finger towards the sky to signify that an idea had just struck him.
- If this counterpart thing is true….
- It is true Adam, whether you like it or not.
- Ok then. Well then what about this…. Take any of the big disasters. Chernobyl….the Twin Towers…. Even World War 2….
- Ok….
- So when the planes hit those buildings and how many passengers died? A hundred?
- More like three hundred.
- Even better….
Kate loved the way that Adam classed two hundred more deaths as ‘even better’, just because it illustrated his point. She wasn’t in a position to be pointing out his selfish flaws right now though.
- …. Not to mention all those poor sods walking around New York that got crushed when the towers gave way. What’s that? Another few thousand?
- Probably, yeah.
It suddenly clicked in Kate’s head where Adam was heading with all of this.
- Ok. So about four thousand people die on the same day, most of them within the same hour or so. And all of these people have counterparts on the other side of the world, yeah?
- Adam. I know what you’re….
- So you’re telling me their counterparts all died at that same moment? Four thousand counterparts just going about their shit on the other side of the world. They just dropped down dead randomly because their counterparts had just been crushed by a sky scraper? Oh come on man!
- The world’s a big place, not every death makes the news Adam.
- Yeah, but if four thousand people dropped down dead for no fucking reason, that’d have been bigger news than the Twin Towers themselves!
- But you wouldn’t see them all drop down at the same time would you. They’d be spread out, so they’d just go down as normal, every-day deaths. Four thousand’s not that many in the big picture.
- It is if they all drop down dead for no apparent reason.
- But it’s not like that. The world sort of….I don’t know…. finds a way for them to die.
Adam afforded this point a few seconds’ consideration.
- What…. Like fate or something?
- I suppose so. Take Harry for example. To me and you it looked like he just fell off the top bunk of his bed and cracked his head open in the night….
- But he didn’t! Joe and Harrison fucking murdered him to kill his counterpart didn’t they? The bastards!
Adam tutted and shook his head in disgust.
- No, you dickhead. Nobody murdered Harry….
Kate hadn’t spoken to Adam in that tone for a while. She’d been too busy trying to be nice, new Katey. It felt good to let it out again though.
- ….What I mean is that at first, it looked like Harry falling to his death was just an accident. A coincidence. Just one of those things that happens. Sod’s law or whatever.
- Well if it wasn’t, then what happened to him?
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- After you went to bed that night, the night we found Harry dead, Joe and Harrison took me into the office and told me about Andrea Fuentes.
- Let me guess, Harry’s counterpart….
- Uhhu.
- ….Who lives in Ducie with the rest of our counterparts.
- Uhhu. Now you’re getting it. He lives in Ducie with the counterparts of everyone at the Institution, who were shipped out to Ducie to be monitored, and….
- And they needed to kill Andrea, so they pushed Harry off his bunk and made it look like an accident?
- No Adam. Jesus! It’s like talking to a little kid.
It wasn’t like talking to a kid at all. In fact, a kid would have probably fainted with confusion, or ran off to lick a window somewhere by now.
- Andrea had an accident over in Ducie that same night. Fell into a lake or something. Nothing dodgy about it. He genuinely slipped.
- He drowned?
- Well it was a chemical lake apparently. So yeah…. drowned, sizzled to death, whatever. He’s dead is what matters.
- Well what are they doing letting them loose with chemicals over there? Shouldn’t they be housing them up in padded cells? I mean….if they do harm to themselves, then one us dies too.
- Oh no. They’ve got them working, mining for copper out there.
- What? The government are making money out of this shit at the same time? That’s practically slavery. The fucking cheek of them!
- Well the copper’s there to be had and the exports of it fund the project. Pays for the Institution, the nice food there, the staff, everything. Everything here and everything over there in Ducie. It makes sense if you think about it.
Adam briefly considered it, but quickly came to the conclusion that given everything he’d heard so far, how they’d funded it all was probably the least amazing part in comparison.
- So Harry falling off the bunk was the world’s way of killing him off to balance Andrea’s death; because the two of them were each other’s counterpart.
Kate mockingly made a sign of the holy cross and whispered thanks to the heavens.
- You’re getting it now.
Adam’s face had shed its scowling look of scepticism and interrogation, replaced by a genuine look of awe. He stuttered a couple of times, trying to speak, but quickly deciding that the words he had lined up didn’t do justice to his amazement at the situation.
- Fucking….fucking….wow Katey. I mean….just ….fucking…. just wow!
- Tell me about it.
Kate thought she’d feel elated at this point, having finally seen signs that Adam got what was happening. She just felt exhausted though.
- So you see now why we need to get back there quickly, Adam?
- Yeah….I mean….well. They’re going to kill me anyway if I don’t. So what have I got to lose?
- Exactly!
Adam hauled himself to his feet with the arthritic groan of someone much older than him. He didn’t see or hear the chav come from behind him, but he felt a subtle, yet sinister shift in the atmosphere, a split second before the dull pain reverberated around his left buttock, caused by the full force of a stranger’s boot.
- Fucking woah dickhead! You got a spare fag?
The car-park chav barged into Adam with his shoulder, as if the fact that he wasn’t technically laying a hand on him made this invasion of his personal space acceptable. Adam ‘s stomach collapsed under the weight of a sudden adrenaline dump, making him feel like he was literally about to shit himself. The amazing thing about the body is that it gears you up for flight or fight mode by delivering a cargo dump of adrenaline as soon as it senses danger. It’s a product of evolution, designed to make you ready to fight harder or run faster. It doesn’t matter if you’re a seasoned professional fighter or a wimpy, scrawny little drug addict with absolutely no desire for physical conflict, the process that occurs is the same. The body is trying to help prepare you to survive, but if you don’t recognise that sudden arrival of bulk adrenaline for what it is, it can be a terrifying experience, as your stomach turns itself into painful knots of apprehension. Needless to say, Adam wasn’t a fighter. He turned his back and staggered away, clutching his left buttock.
- Don’t turn your back on people, gay boy! Didn’t your Mom teach you manners dickhead?
Another boot, thrown with the grace and expertise of a disabled chicken, but nonetheless landing with surprising consistency on the same spot on Adam’s buttock, which was now covered by his hand. His knuckles cracked, sending a sickly feeling to his head as his hand absorbed the blow.
- Fuck off you idiot.
It was instinctive, but Adam immediately regretted his choice of words. He thought about running, but knew his speed and stamina would fail him, likely resulting in a guaranteed kicking.
- Oh yeah! Oh yeah! He’s a big man now.
The chav threw his head back in mock laughter.
- Oh my gosh! Danny, Danny. Come here man! The Big Issue tramp thinks he’s a big man now innit!
At that point, the cavalry arrived in the form of another sneering youth, who was apparently called Danny. Kate recognised him as the lad kicking the bin outside McDonald’s. The ringleader was under pressure to entertain his mini-audience now. Danny waited expectantly.
- Call me an idiot again, bell end! Go on, dickhead! Call me an idiot again.
Kate stepped in between them.
- Just leave him. He’s done nothing to you.
The ringleader’s eyes lit up with delight at Kate’s intervention. This added a whole new dimension of possibilities to his stand-up routine now. Ringleader looked Kate up and down, nodding ferociously.
- Hello sexy. You got a fag?
Kate shook her head timidly. Ringleader had cleverly dismissed her very presence with his random request for a cigarette.
- Well unless you’ve got a fag for me, then fuck off…. Unless you want a shag that is.
Danny saw a poetic opportunity that was too good to pass up.
- A fag or a shag…. You fucking slag!
Ringleader reeled backwards in laughter at this impromptu piece of poetry. He swung his hand back and forth, making a snapping sound that was seemingly intended to express his appreciation towards Danny.
- Leave her out of it. It’s me you’ve got a problem with, isn’t it?
Adam’s unexpectedly bold interruption changed Ringleader’s mood. Hysterical laughter quickly morphed into an intimidating glare.
- Oh finally, Big Issue man is going to fight his own battles. You want some then do ya, dickhead?
Ringleader’s arms were spread wide, inviting Adam’s advance. His chest puffed out like a proud cockerel. Head nodding furiously to confirm his fearless intentions.
- He doesn’t want anything. Just leave us alone, ok.
Kate’s request for peaceful resolution was effectively dismissed by Danny, whose next contribution to proceedings, following his earlier poetic input, was to summon the contents of his throat into his mouth with a scratchy growl and to launch a batch of projectile green spit into the air, which after looping through the night sky in slow motion, eventually came to rest on the breast pocket of Adam’s jacket. The boys rocked around the pavement in laughter once more, but had their moment of self-appreciation cut short once again by Adam, but this time he was charging for Ringleader.
- You dirty bastard!
Adam moved quicker than he thought he was capable of, clutching himself around the waist of Ringleader, before the boy was even aware he was in a fight. And that’s where Adam’s upper hand ended. Without a notion of what to do from this advantageous position he’d miraculously forced his way into , Adam leaned and groaned with little effect. It didn’t take Ringleader long to realise that Adam was now a sitting target. First he rained five thumping blows into Adam’s back, stopping after the third and fourth to ensure he had Danny’s full support. Danny egged his friend on accordingly, whilst keeping a close eye on Kate, who for now at least showed
no signs of coming to Adam’s rescue. Ringleader’s focus the switched to the head. He reached a hand around Adam’s hunched over body to find a path to his face, before raining two hooked blows to his face. The second one made Adam release his grip on Ringleader’s body and collapse in a pathetic heap on the pavement.
- Fucking yeah mate! That’s what I’m talking about! Mess with the Cooksy and this is the sort of shit that happens to you! I fuck people up! You get me?
The boys had their brief bravado-fuelled celebration at having overcome a 9 stone drug addict that didn’t really want a fight in the first place, before realising that they better not stick around too long, lest be held accountable for the condition of the scrawny, bleeding man lying on the floor in front of them. A final few parting obscenities were shouted for good measure, and the delightful pair of youths disappeared into the night.