“What do you mean?” Ron leaned forward, feeling sick and eager at the same time.
“My hand stopped about two inches from her body. It was like I was touching something solid but when I looked down there was a definite space between us.” The others shook their heads in disbelief.
“Maybe it’s the dress,” Vicky said. “I mean it does look sort of magical. All those colors, it’s like nothing we’ve ever seen.”
“I tested my theory tonight. I reached out to put my hand on her back and the same thing happened.”
“But, we shook hands and it was definitely skin to skin contact,” Shane argued.
“I know. Maybe she has to initiate the contact to break the field. Or only uses it when there is the possibility of danger. She must control it somehow.”
“Good Lord! This conversation sounds like something out of Star Trek. Maybe she isn’t even real. Maybe this is just a dream.” Jamie looked sad and bewildered.
“Maybe,” Ian said. “We’ll have to see what happens tomorrow.”
*
“I like them.” Elspeth said. “She’s chosen well. But, that one, Ron? What did he mean when he said he was fucked?”
Yeah, buddy, we are. “It’s a bad Earth word meaning he’s in trouble.”
“How is he in trouble?”
Because he doesn’t think of Em as a mother and neither do I. Elspeth tapped her foot and I knew I had to come up with an answer that would satisfy her. “He’s obsessed with Em.”
“You mean he’s fallen in love with her?” My sister blushed at her words and tilted her head. So, there was something to the rumors about her and a boyfriend. Elspeth giggled. “That explains the goofy expression on his face every time he looks at Em.”
The guy had it bad. Trouble was I probably wore that same expression when I thought of her.
Chapter 22
Gram poked her head in the door of Ron’s den. “Tony, are you hungry? We’ve eaten, but I can easily fix you something.”
“Thanks, love, but I ate on the plane.”
“You call that food.”
Tony laughed. “It wasn’t that bad.” Gram made a face. “Okay, yes it was, but I was hungry so I ate it anyway.”
“If you’re sure…? I’m off to my dance class. See you two later. Don’t stay up too late.”
“Gotta love her,” Tony said as Ron closed the door behind her. “Okay, pal, give. I want every damn detail.”
“Hey, it’s not my fault you were incommunicado. I called every number I knew that morning. Didn’t want you to miss the lunch of a lifetime. Where the hell were you? Off somewhere with your latest fling? Hope she was worth it.”
Tony waggled his hand in a so-so gesture. “Talk!”
“We met at Jamie’s for lunch. The kids glommed onto Em like little magnets.” Ron shook his head. “You would have been amazed. You know how sullen Tia can be sometimes?”
“Oh yeah. The joys of having a teenager in the house. Don’t envy you, man.”
“Well, you should have seen her, and the other kids—animated philosophers, I tell you. Comfortable with Em, no question. As if she was one of them. She knew a lot about them, and they liked that. Just as she knew a lot about us.”
“Didn't that feel like an invasion?”
Ron considered the question carefully. “I hadn’t thought about it that way, but no.”
“Part of her magic?”
“I guess.” Why, he asked himself, why did she have that effect?
“So what did she and the kids talk about? Sex? Drugs?”
Ron laughed. “What didn’t they discuss would be a better question.”
*
What happened to your hand?” Cole was the first to speak after the introductions. Typical kid, direct and honest. Em chuckled. The first two fingers of her left hand were bandaged together.
“I’m pretty much a klutz. I mashed my fingers between hand weights working out this morning.”
“You can’t be a klutz,” Tia said. “Not from what we see on TV anyway.”
“Oh, but I am.”
Cole snuggled up beside Em on the settee. She put an arm around his shoulder and asked, “Who is the person who has most influenced you?”
“My dad.” Judging by the look on Ron’s face, Tia’s answer had surprised him.
“Why?”
“No matter what happens he stays calm. Even if it’s something really upsetting, he doesn’t panic. He gets all quiet and you know he’s thinking it through. I admire the way he looks at all sides before he decides what to do. I think it drives Gram crazy though because her style is to take charge and attack the problem right away.” Em looked over at Gram to see her nodding in agreement and glaring at Ron who grinned widely at her.
“What do you look for in a friend?” Em was always curious about teens’ thinking. So often the reality didn’t match the stereotype that many adults had of them.
“There’s a term that I think comes from Asian gangs, but don’t quote me on that—solid,” Adam said. “To me it means being a friend one hundred percent. Someone who is not going to cheat me or back-stab me. Someone completely reliable. My best friend would be the first person to bail me out and not do it because he expected something in return.”
“Loyalty, honor, and respect are important too,” Amy said. “Respect has to be earned, not bought by material giveaways.”
“How do others earn your respect?”
“By not being judgmental or condemning about my political views, or how I dress, or how I go about things.” Tia had obviously given this a lot of thought.
“And adults?”
“By allowing us to find our own path.” Amy shot a meaningful glance in the direction of her parents.
“Amy!” her mother hissed.
“What?” Amy's tone turned belligerent. “You don't want me blabbing family stuff?”
“There's such a thing as discretion,” Ian said.
“Right, Dad. Only Mom doesn't know what that is. Ask her what she discusses on bridge night or her book club or her golf dates.”
Her mom's face reddened. “Amy, please!”
Em put a hand on the girl's arm. Amy ducked her head. Her body trembled a little. An age old battle, Em thought. She'd talk to the two later, for now she needed a diversion. “What would you be willing to do for a friend?” she asked.
“Anything,” Adam said.
“Even something illegal? And, would you expect him to do something illegal for you?”
“It would depend on what kind of illegal,” Brad said. “Moral illegal would be different than law illegal. I wouldn’t do it just because a friend asked me to, like run drugs or something, but I would drive without a license if I thought it was necessary.”
Em glanced at Ron. His expression told her that his children were surprising him. They were great and obviously had a lot of respect for him. Didn’t he know them, listen to them? She was disappointed in him.
Amy had a question. “I’m finishing high school this year and my parents are insisting I have to go to college, but I don’t know if I want to.” Amy’s resentment simmered dangerously close to the surface.
“We'll talk later,” Em said.
But Amy wasn't ready to let it go. “What do you tell your kids? You do have kids?”
Em reached over and squeezed Amy’s hand. God, I love kids. That thought and the feelings coursing through her heart unhinged her. That must have come from my real life, the life I had—or have—apart from this one. Please, someone tell me. She glanced up at the sky. Why? Why look up? She felt like such a beggar just then, but she didn’t care. She wanted answers.
“We watch you all the time,” Jennifer said. “You do so many dangerous things. Aren’t you scared?”
Em sighed inwardly. No answers for her, but maybe she had some for the kids. “I’m always petrified I’m not doing the right things.”
“Why do you do it then?” Cole asked.
“It’s my job.”
“Do you really think you can stop war?” Adam asked.
Em froze. Her heart hardened. A mere touch and she would crack and splinter and sink away. Adam reached out as if to comfort her, and then let his hand drop with a helpless look to his parents.
“Are you okay,” Cole asked. His voice, so full of concern, warmed her. He was still beside her on the settee, but had pulled away and was looking anxiously up at her. “Madame?” Cole put his hand on her cheek. “Mom! Do something,” he called to Jamie. “Do something.” Her icy heart began to melt. She hugged him tightly and smiled wanly at Adam.
“To answer your question, Adam, I must or I wouldn’t keep trying.” Her tone was light, but she couldn’t stop the trembling, the aftershock of the feelings the question had roused in her. War. God damn fucking war.
“Most adults are uncomfortable with teens. How come you’re not?” Jennifer asked.
“I spend a lot of time with kids. They have been my best teachers.” So that’s what I do in my real life? Work with teens. Why is it these answers come when I’m not thinking about it, but if I consciously try to catch my real life it always eludes me?
“Do you like babies and little kids too?” Cole asked.
“Yes, of course.” She ruffled his hair and he grinned up at her adoringly.
“Did you learn stuff from us today?” Brad asked.
“You taught me to be careful with what I do or say because I don’t always know who I may influence and how.”
“But adults are supposed to influence us, teach us,” Tia argued.
“Of course. But the most important part of the process of growing is to learn to think and decide for yourselves. Dig for information, get informed, ask questions, demand answers, and make your own decisions. Never believe it just because someone said so.”
“Even you?” Amy grinned
“Oh, yes. I’m a product of media hype too. Don’t agree just because it’s me.”
*
Mentor gestured with her finger for me to approach. The scowl on her face scared me.
“What is she doing with all those little human kidlets?”
“Just spending some time with them. As a favor to their parents.”
“You mean it’s not part of her job?”
“No-o.” So, I let Em do it her way and I was in trouble again. Ah well, what else was new?
“So, she’s just talking with them?”
“Yes.”
“Why is that little one sitting so close to her?”
“I guess because he likes her.”
“Hum.” A sad, wistful look flitted across Mentor’s face.
I wanted to tell her I thought the kids were pretty cool. Not like up here. We’re all so … conservative, I guess is the word, or maybe reserved is a better way to describe us. A conversation like the one Em had with the children wouldn’t happen up here. We keep things bottled up. Formal and staid, we are, especially the young around adults. I thought about that a lot after watching this scene. I spied on groups of human children to see how they behaved without adults. Pretty scandalous some of the time, the things they discussed, the things they did. Our ways were definitely better, I thought. Definitely.
“Solid … interesting word,” Mentor said.
Another great kid word. I rolled it on my tongue. Solid. Em was solid. Exelrud was solid. So was my sister. I think I was too.
*
“Wowza! What a day you guys had.” Tony grinned.
“Yes, but—”
“No buts about it, you lucky bastard. Did she spend all of the time with the kids?”
“Pretty much. Not that she neglected the adults, understand. It just seemed she was more comfortable with the kids or maybe understood that their needs were more urgent than ours.” Or maybe the need was hers, Ron realized with sudden insight as a vision of the kids hugging her goodbye filled his mind’s eye. Maybe she needed their energy, their enthusiasm, needed their need of her. “It was a magical afternoon for all of us.”
“Everyone says she’s beautiful. They even call her a golden goddess. She looks pretty damn good in all the pictures we see. What’s she like in real life?”
“Tony, she’s amazing. Her green eyes sparkle with fun and mischief and love of life. She has a great figure, curvy and—you’ll love this—very fit, and a beautiful golden-toned skin that is flawless. Her hair gleams blond, gold, red. She has a wonderful genuine laugh, sees the humor in all but the gravest situations. That is where her beauty comes from. Yes, she is beautiful, inside and out. The most beautiful person I’ve ever met.”
“Hey buddy, sounds like you’re in love with her.”
“Of course I am. Aren’t you? Isn’t everybody?” Ron laughed. “Let’s be honest, we all want to park our shoes under her bed.”
“Oh, yeah. You got that right.” Tony laughed along with Ron. “How did the women react to her? Were they jealous? What did Jamie say?”
Ron sighed. How to explain? “How could anyone be jealous of her after all she’s done?”
“Yeah. Gotta respect her, that’s for sure. So, if you had to sum her up in one word, what would it be?”
“Thanks Tony. Ask the easy questions, why don’t you?” Dozens of words came to mind. Motherly. Sexy as hell. Confident, bordering on arrogant. Scared, sometimes for her personal safety, but also for the consequences of her actions.
Tony wanted one word. A whole dictionary wouldn’t suffice.
Chapter 23
Em floated far above the clouds, Earth appearing smaller and smaller as it receded into the vast blackness that was the sky. The sensation of a weightless eternity was a balm to her heart. Soaring. Soaring.
“You are not dead. You are not dreaming.” I kept my voice deep, calm, and soothing. “We have transported you here. Do not be afraid.” She wasn’t. “You believe in aliens.” This was not a question. I knew.
“Yes.”
“Why don’t you believe in gods?”
“They’re nothing more than mankind’s way of explaining our existence. It’s much simpler than that.”
What? Me? Simple? “How so?” I asked.
“We happened by pure accident in the evolutionary process.”
Accident! I chuckled. The Guardians wouldn’t like to hear that. “What do you believe happens when you die?”
“I had a near-death experience once. It was like this. Flawless calm.”
Now she was catching on. “And after death?”
“Nothing. Or maybe we become ghosts. Maybe we live another life somewhere.”
Really catching on. “Do you know who we are?”
She looked down to an earth no bigger than a pin point. “The controllers.”
“Yes. We are Powers. We work for the Guardians of the Universe.”
“Sounds suspiciously like talk of gods to me.”
“Not gods. But we do keep an eye on things, so to speak.”
“And interfere when you decide things aren’t going right. Use people like me to do the dirty work.”
Her words, her snarky tone; I should have been indignant, would have been with anyone other than my Little Soldier. “Yes.”
“Why didn’t you tell me all this at the beginning, before I started flailing about Earth on my little errands?” Again, the snarky tone. She really was gutsy or just so angry she didn’t care what I might do to her.
“Experience has taught us it is better for an aboriginal of a planet to learn about the powers we bestow in their own way. You have already learned much. You will continue to learn.”
“Please tell me you are guiding me.”
“All the time at first, yes. Less often now. You have an innate understanding of the complexities of your planet. You, acting on instinct, are ultimately more efficient and effective than our directives could ever be.”
“Christ! Isn’t that putting a little too much faith in a mere human? Not to mention it’s a h
ell of a burden?”
“What you do weighs heavily, I know.”
“You control my transports. At least you did at first, and still do most often, the locations, the timing.”
Her mind jumping like that scared me. Was she ADHD or something? No, no, I assured myself. It was just the strangeness of it all. I had to reassure her. “Of course,” I said. “You can’t do it all by yourself.”
“How can I be so sure that I am doing the right things?”
“You have always questioned, considered, thought, and wanted more for the world.”
“What do you mean, always? I have no knowledge of a time other than this, of a life before the jungle bloodbath.”
“You are two halves of a whole.”
“I do have another life.” She was ecstatic. The answer made her feel less disconnected as I knew it would. “Why don’t I remember?”
“You already remember some things. More will come to you when the time is right. The relationship of Miracle Madame—silly name they gave you—to your regular life is also better discovered on your own in your own time.”
She looked down; the speck that was Earth even tinier now. She took a deep breath, and then blurted, “How can you be sure that, through me, you are doing the right things for Earth?”
Oh Guardian, the very question I asked myself constantly. She wasn’t supposed to ask it. She was supposed to be my reassurance, my safety net. I had to do something, and fast.
“You worry too much, but that, too, makes you more effective.” My effort to soothe her succeeded only in riling her again.
She threw up her hands. “Now isn’t that just jim-dandy. Obviously, there’ll be no relief from the grinding stress of this hellish role you’ve given me.”
Sometimes she knew too much. And, though she desperately wanted to press the issue, she shifted topics. I sighed with relief. She’d be strong enough—for both of us; do the right things—for both of us.
“But, if I have a real life somewhere else, how is it that I can be gone so much? Doesn’t anyone notice?”
“We control time. To them you’re never gone.” I don’t think she heard my answer. She had so many questions whirling in her head.
“They say I’m perfect, that everything I do is miraculously right.”
“It works best if they think that.”
“Why don’t I—?”
“Do you think war can be stopped?”
“I wish!”
“We know what you wish. The question is—do you think war can be stopped?”