Chapter 15
Melissa felt she was conscious, but was genuinely scared to open her eyes. She lay somewhere, on something soft, but other than that she didn’t know what happened to her.
Am I alive?
A sharp pang of hunger was her answer.
Yup.
She sat up and opened her eyes, and found she was in her room. Daria sat beside her, along with Richard and Vincent.
“You’re awake!” cried Daria. “Are you alright?”
“Yeah . . . what happened?”
“When the music went out, I went looking for you,” said Vincent. “I found you had collapsed, and had that cut on your arm.”
Melissa stared intently at Vincent, trying to figure out what his game was. Is he going to pretend like all that didn’t happen? Is he really going to protect me, instead of turning me over to the Freilux?
“Yeah,” said Melissa slowly, “I tripped on something and fell down -- I must have cut my arm on some rock or metal.”
“Well, as long as you’re alright -- you gave everyone quite a scare.”
“Sorry. I feel like such a fool! Was the whole party ruined?”
“No!” cried Daria, “That was the best time any of us ever had!”
Daria got up, and motioned Richard to do the same. “If you’re up for it, come down and join us for lunch. They’re making something special for you . . .”
Daria opened the door to leave, but Richard stood there, a woefully pathetic expression on his face that made Melissa want to laugh.
“I’m . . . sorry, Melissa, for what I said last night.”
“Apologize all you want brother,” snapped Vincent, getting to his feet, “your lies don’t mean anything.”
“Fuck you!”
Richard shoved Vincent hard, so he fell off the bed. Vincent got up, grabbed him, and slammed him against the wall. While Richard was older, Vincent was stronger, and Melissa knew now he harbored some terrible power underneath his sheep’s clothing. “You fuck with me, I fuck you up!” he yelled.
“Vincent -- no,” said Melissa, as she sat on the edge of the bed. “It’s alright -- just leave him alone.”
Vincent roughly let him go, and Richard pushed him away, but before Vincent could respond, Daria got between them.
“Come on, Richard, let’s leave them alone.”
Vincent slammed the door behind them once they had left. He still hadn’t looked at Melissa, and even now, he leaned against the wall and centered his gaze on a piece of broken tile on the floor.
“Why did you let me go?”
He shrugged. “Dunno.”
“Are you an Archsussa too?”
“I honestly couldn’t tell you. I feel like I’m something in-between human and Archsussa. What I do know, for certain, is that like you, I am idelfada.”
“A creation of the Freilux?”
For the first time, he met her gaze and said; “yes.”
“Of whom?” asked Melissa, worried yet interested. “You said my father hurt and killed your father?”
“I am a resurrection of his son. More accurately, I am a copy of that resurrection. The Freilux could only maintain his body for a few seconds, but in that time, he made an idelfada. And that idelfada is me.”
He must have used the Centric Sphere! But who knew he possessed that skill, that power?
“So we’re the same?”
“Yeah,” said Vincent. “Maybe that’s why I let you go. How’s your arm?”
“Better.” She peeled away the bandage, and saw a long, purple bruise. She tried to use sussa to heal herself, but it only thinned the bruise. “I can’t heal fully.”
“You never will. Didn’t anyone tell you never to cut yourself? An Archsussa can live for a very long time, by healing and rejuvenating themselves. But they always have the option to die, as a self-inflicted wound cannot be fully healed. If ever you face the Freilux, it is a weakness he will exploit.”
“I think he already has.”
“What do you mean?” asked Vicnent.
“Nothing. Well . . . I felt this bruise a long time ago. It’s as if my body knew it would be here!”
Vincent nodded. “I learned a long time ago that sussa enhances your intuition. You should never ignore your intuition.”
Melissa stood and came close to Vincent. Unlike Richard, he didn’t move away. She could feel his heat, and memories of his other form, made of black shale with massive wings, made him immensely dangerous and utterly irresistible to her.
“What kind of power do you have?”
“I . . . can do things you might not have tried yet,” he said, running his hand along her forearm. “The Freilux schooled me well in the arts of sussa.” He grasped her right hand, and pulled her forearm up to his lips. She tried to pull away, but he said; “if I wanted to hurt you, I would have finished things back then.”
He slowly kissed where the bruise was, and she instantly felt weak. It was as if her very soul was slipping out, through that bruise, and into Vincent’s lips.
“It is said Archsussa long ago practiced unique forms of lovemaking. Some of it involved physical pain, before pleasure.”
She pulled him against her, and kissed along his forehead, running her hands through his thick hair.
“What about you . . . and me? What does your intuition tell you?”
He pushed her away. “What am I doing? I can’t be with the daughter of Darian! I might have spared you, but that’s it!”
He rushed out the door, slamming it behind him, and Melissa fell back on the bed, crying.
When she finally managed to make it down to the dining hall, after washing up and a change of clothes, she was greeted by loud cheering. A veritable banquet was set out for her, and she was grateful for it. Even the adults on the periphery smiled at her, with many waving as she glanced at them.
What have I become to them?
It was then she saw Richard, sitting with a group of adult scientists. He met her gaze, and managed a limp wave.
Why can’t I keep my eyes off him? He so stupid, so arrogant, so mean, but I just can’t look away. I hate him! Why can’t he just like me for who I am? I know I could change him. I know my sussa could change him, but I don’t want him that way. I don’t want him to be like . . . Asil.
It was the first time in a long while she thought of her creation. It was as if she was hit with a hammer, as the memories of her time with Asil and the hlenna came flooding back. She suddenly felt that she had shirked an immense responsibility.
“What are you thinking about?” asked Daria, who sat down next to her. Melissa turned to look at her, and thought;
These people have learned a great deal over a number of years; what will my effect be to them? Will they stop learning, when I can divine things in an instant? Will they stop making their machines, when I can protect them or transport them without strain?
“I don’t know.”
“Vincent?”
Melissa moaned. “Why are boys so damned difficult?”
“Because they’re boys!” cried Daria.
They both laughed, and Daria gave her a long, tight hug.
“Besides, what fun would it be if things were easy?” asked Daria. “Sometimes I think I’d like to be with Richard, but other times I see the other boys at school, and . . . well . . .”
“I miss school. Never thought I’d say that.”
“Oh yeah, I never think about all you must have left behind. Did you ever try to find out if your friends survived?”
“That would mean going back to Imathrin, and the Freilux. I guess that’s another reason to fight; so I can see my friends again.”
“Well, you can always got o school with us!” cried Daria, getting excited. “Classes start up again in a week. I mean, now that you’re a citizen, and one of us, why not do as we do? You can always make new friends, and --”
Melissa took a deep breath, and said; “Daria, there is something you still don’t know abou
t me; like there was something you didn’t know about Richard.” Daria set down her fork, and Melissa felt her intense gaze. “I . . . I’m not real.”
Daria looked at her quizzically.
“I . . . I am a creation of another. For most of my life, I thought I was Melissa. But after the fall of the Levitating Cities, after I ran from the Freilux and set out on my own, I learned that I am merely a copy of another. I am an echo, Daria, and when Richard or anyone else finds out, no matter what scientific secrets I could help uncover, no one will ever want to be with me. Your people could accept an Archsussa, but I doubt they could accept an idelfada; a creation of another.”
She could see a small degree of relief spread over Daria’s face, and it only made her feel sick.
“Thank you for telling me. Why did you? You could keep it a secret, and no one would ever know.”
“Richard and Sliona were right all along,” explained Melissa, “about the temptation of the Archsussa. Look at what I’ve done! You showed me your fête, and I changed it to what I like, with a blink of the eye. While I see happiness on everyone’s face, I also see expectation; what will I do next, and whom will I do it for? Your people’s uniqueness would dissolve in less than a month on a Levitating City, and if I stayed this might as well become one. All your individuality would be lost, and with it all your desire to learn more and better yourselves. I need to leave; I have worn out my welcome.”
Daria put her hand gently on Melissa’s. “Don’t go. I’m sorry about what happened with Richard, but don’t make that the reason you leave. I really do like having you as a friend, and perhaps you give us too little credit; we have lived this long in isolation, perhaps we will adapt to you and you to us, and we can live in some kind of balance.”
“No,” replied Melissa, her mind now firmly decided. “Thank you, but no. I am still so greedy. I wouldn’t survive as your Archsussa; the power I wield would be my undoing. I must go back, to my home, back to my brother, back to face the Freilux. I feel like I just got a warning, about how powerful and insidious the Freilux is.”
“Lissa . . . this scares you, doesn’t it?” asked Daria, concerned. “After all you have done, facing us, taking Richard back through time, standing up to the Overmen you described, you’re still anxious?”
Melissa finally broke down, letting loose the floodgates of tears. “You just don’t know, Daria. I am scared at every turn; I feel my death or dishonor stalks me, and with one misstep it will claim me. I have struggled against the Freilux, struggled to learn after my mother died, struggled to escape from you when I thought you would dissect me, and struggled to get back my ability to use sussa.” She took a deep breath. “I have survived, but fear walks with me, it covers me like a blanket when I sleep and like a bitter vapor while awake.”
Daria held her hand and said; “in life, it is not enough to merely survive; one must thrive, and triumph. Perhaps that is why I will stand by Richard’s side, no matter what he has done. He may have cheated, but he also hungers for a better life, strives to conquer what is thrown against him. You must do the same, Archsussa. Conquer what stands before you, no matter how you must do it, no matter the cost. It will be better than if you merely endured it, and accepted the unbearable pressure of living.”
“Sometimes I think you might yield to that pressure,” whispered Melissa.
The smile vanished from Daria’s face, and she propped her elbows on the table and hung her head in-between, her long hair covering her face. “I just get sad sometimes. It can be either really boring here, or really painful. It’s always cold, there is always snow, and Richard is always distant.” Melissa saw a few drops of fluid fall from Daria’s face. “I just get tired. I mean, I love my mother and father, but they’re so distant too. Before you came, I felt all alone.”
Melissa held her hand. “Before I met you, I was all alone.”
Daria abruptly flung back her head, wiped off the tears, and plastered on a big smile. “But you’re going, now, and I have to be happy for you. I have to hope you’ll win, and come back, so we can be friends again. But . . . what if you win? Will you live on Imathrin again?”
“I don’t know. Life is very good up there, but I like being here now. Would you come up with me, and live up there?”
“My parents would probably hate me if I did.” Daria slapped her hand on the table. “Listen, whatever. Don’t worry about me -- you have enough to worry about. Just . . . I hope you come back.”
Melissa got up from the table. “I will; I promise.”
“Good,” said Daria, with a gentle nod.
Part IV