When it came to picking rooms, panic set in. I couldn"t look at Lincoln. Griffin took the first, then as we walked down the hall, Ermina allocated suites one by one. I was impressed she"d remembered all of our names from the brief introductions. She presented so meekly, especially for a Grigori. If I hadn"t known better – looking at her fragile frame, mousy hair and small features – I would have thought a gust of wind could take her down.
Griffin walked into his room but just before he closed his door, he gave me a look. I was sure he wanted to say something but seemed to restrain himself.
Yes, it"s immune. Yes, it"s something inappropriate. Yes, my mind should have been out of the gutter. But when Zoe ducked into her room, departing by giving me a sly grin, I was burning hot.
The remarkable thing is how much quick thinking can happen in a short walk down in a corridor after Zoe disappeared, Salvatore was allocated the next room.
Will Lincoln say something? Suggest we share a room? Do I have an answer?
Lincoln seemed so sure all of a sudden, but was that just because everything had gotten so crazy? Maybe he wasn"t himself. And with that, came another sickening though. Maybe, when I"d healed him, sent him my love, it overshadowed his real feelings. Maybe he was just mirroring my own feelings. That I put there. Was that even possible?
There was so much I stil didn"t know.
Or Ermina"s instruction, Rudyard took the next room and then Nyla the one after. They had no qualms about being together and letting everyone know it, so I wondered why they did this. Nyla looked at me and I waited to see if she would say something. But she just gave me a knowing smile, which made me blush, as she closed her door.
Ermina opened the next door. „Lincoln, this will be your residence," she said.
Lincoln walked over and then looked back at me. Why was I panicking so much? When I started fidgeting and tucked a few strands of hair behind my ear, he smiled warmly and came back to me. I was so edge I flinched when he brushed a hand across my cheek, igniting my desire. He leaned close and I couldn"t help but gravitate towards him.
„Remember, Vi," he turned us slightly so his back was to Ermina and he mouthed the next word with raised eyebrows, „devout".
Then his look changed. A whole lot more intense, private. I was still panicking, knowing that while Ermina couldn"t see Lincoln"s face, she had full view of mine.
Lincoln smiled, obviously pleased with my reaction, before he turned and went into his room without looking back.
Ermina watched me with a strange, distinctly disapproving expression, which morphed into a stern look when she opened the next door on the other side of the hall.
„Violet, this wil be your residence throughout your stay."
I nodded and started to take a step forward, but from the glare she gave me, I knew to stop.
„We are in a time of prayer. Unless you are married to someone here, we expect you wil not enter another"s person"s private chambers."
That"s why Nyla had been smiling. It seemed totally obvious now but I"d had my mind in another place. A little warning might have been nice – they clearly knew the rules.
„Of course," I said, nodding profusely. „I"m … um … I"m Catholic," as if that were supposed to mean something. As soon as I said it, I wanted to die.
Ermina cleared her throat. I had definitely started off on the wrong foot with her. I decided on a fast exit and gave her my best attempt at a respectful bow before scooting into my room.
I waited, like a statue, back to the door, listening for footsteps. Once I was sure she was gone I took a few deep breaths to try and stave off the hyperventilation that was brewing and banged my head against the wall.
The suite was a continuation of the beauty we had already seen. I thought of Dad, how he would see its many merits. Then I thought of Steph. She was going to kill me when she found out the kind of place we were staying. I actually wished for a moment she was there –
before I remembered why we were there.
I"d barely unpacked my bag and splashed some water on my face when I heard a knock. I went to the door and opened it, still patting my face dry, but no one was there.
I heard the knock. I went to the door and opened it, still patting my face dry, but no one was there.
I heard the knock again and this time looked around to see where it was coming from.
There was an internal door. When I opened it, Nyla was on the other side.
„You could"ve warned me," I said, taking in her smug smile as she leaned against the doorway. In spite of the satisfaction, she really did have the air of an ancient goddess.
„You"ll know for next time," she said, stil grinning.
Great, another person that gets their kicks at my expense.
„Did you come to gloat?"
„No. I"m headed off to do a security lap. Thought you might come in handy. Interested?"
„Sure."
She tilted her head towards the door, „Let"s go."
„Just us?"
She nodded. „It"s easier. Men always get in the way."
I followed her back down the hal , the same way we"d come in. the hotel was huge and it was unsettling to be in a place designed to house so many when it was empty. The corridors all looked identical. I was glad Nyla seemed to know where she was going.
„I can see you love him," she suddenly said, from nowhere.
I didn"t know what to say, so I changed direction. „Did my Mum love my Dad?"
She nodded once, definitely. „She was a procrastinator. Never thought herself worthy of anything good. When she met James, she tried to talk herself out of it – you know …" she said, honing in on me with a knowing look that made me want to run away. „She was worried about bringing him into this world. But your Dad, he just kept coming back and, well, she loved him. In the end, love will rule the mind."
I felt relieved to hear this. I had wondered since discovering my mother was Grigori if she were still the person I"d imagined. Dad misses her so much – he"l never get over her. I didn"t want that to have been for nothing. It didn"t make all the rest okay, the lies and betrayal, but it was something.
„Is that what happened with you and Rudyard?"
Nyla smiled and steered us towards the hallway that veered to the right.
„Our choice was simple. There was no other option."
I envied her.
„Do me a favour, Violet?"
I gave a non-committal shrug. The truth was, although I liked Nyla, I stil didn"t know her.
My instinct was to trust her. Zoe and Spence clearly did. But I"d been wrong before.
„Ask all the questions you need to ask. Understand the consequences before making your choice. Every choice has a price."
„I don"t understand. What price?" From what I could see, Nyla and Rudyard had it all.
We walked through a door that took us outside and both had to squint into the afternoon sun. Azeem was waiting.
Nyla put a hand on my shoulder, which made me feel a bit squeamish. She acted like she knew me well and it made me uncomfortable.
„Rudy and I will explain everything later." She smiled. „We have plenty of time."
I nodded, moving casually away from her touch.
Azeem showed us the impressive security system that comprised a network of modern surveillance cameras and two more traditional watch-towers, which were manned around the clock.
When Nyla asked me, I pushed out my senses and tried to feel the close surrounds and a little beyond. She didn"t want me to go too far, preferring that I learned to control my scope and just see if there was anything we needed to know about.
I travelled the immediate area, seeking out anything that could activate my senses.
I felt them instantly.
His unique signature.
Waiting for me.
„Are you picking up on anything?" Nyla asked, while Azeem pointed out their look-out stations.
Apple first, as always, with just a hint of so
mething else that made it so … moreish. Musk, maybe. Then the flowers. He smelled like musk and jasmine.
I knew he wanted to see me, knew he could disappear faster than we could reach him. If I told Nyla, he"d leave.
When I hesitated, she raised an eyebrow.
„Nothing," I said, final y responding and Nyla, after a suspicious pause, trustingly accepted my life. I felt even worse.
„Okay," she said to Azeem, and they started to walk back towards the hotel.
„I"m … going to have a look around if that"s okay. I … saw a pool on the way in. Do you mind if I go have a look?" I asked, fidgeting, sure if I go have a look?" I asked, fidgeting, sure it was obvious I was up to something.
„Certainly," Azeem replied. „If you would like to swim, there are towels by the pool deck.
The waters are the natural supply from the springs – I hope you like it hot," he said, giving me a small nod and walking back to the main building.
Nyla gave me a quizzical look. I held her stare and smiled back as reassuringly as I could. She followed Azeem.
I made for the cascading waterfalls, grateful at least that my lies had me moving in the direction I really needed to go.
The mountains, formed of pure stone like they had been carved into shape, were incredible. I could even see why Azeem and Ermina were so devout in their religion – if I lived in a place like this, maybe I"d have had faith, too. Maybe.
The senses intensified as I neared one of the smaller waterfalls. It was strange sensing him like this. Knowing he was calling me. Even stranger that I was going to him, aware of the power he had over me. There was no point running from him. It was too late for that.
I found a trail that was carved into the mountain and started the climb. I fought the nauseousness as I climbed higher and clamped my hands into tight fists, letting my nails dig harshly into my skin to distract me from the déjà vu of being surrounded by cliffs.
As I neared where I knew he would be, water spritzed over me, the wayward sprays from the waterfall, and I spotted the path that led behind it. So many things went through my mind. So many memories. I wondered if he was putting them there. Then, I wondered if he was thinking them, too. My hand moved to my waist and my fingers wrapped around the hilt of my dagger. It would be no use to me here. For one thing. Phoenix was a better fighter than me. And he knew it.
I followed the path into an opening behind the flow of water coming from above. I expected it to be noisy and wet. Oddly, it was quiet and dry.
He stood on the far side, a few metres away. Despite the heat he was wearing jeans and a fitted dark denim jacket. He rested easy on the rocks.
I expected him to something cruel, or make some snide remark. I expected to say something myself, but neither one of us spoke. It was worse. His chocolate eyes were bitter and cold. I finally realised the no matter what had been, no matter how real either his feelings or mine …
He"s going to do this.
And I"m not going to let him.
Our eyes locked and his seemed to warm a little. But it was only to share in a brief moment of acceptance … and regret. It wasn"t going to change anything.
„I see you and your people found their way here safely," he said.
„You actually sound like your glad."
„I wouldn"t have made it so easy for them if I hadn"t wanted you here."
He was playing with me. „Right. We came for the Scriptures."
„Who do you think led you here?" he asked, his smile a little tilted. Secrets hidden within.
„We found the old stories, Phoenix, we know where to look," I pushed.
„I know. I all but opened the books and put them under your noses. You never would have found the location if it weren"t for me."
The penny dropped. „The exiles at the farmhouse."
He just continued smiling.
„That"s why they were really there – so they could tell us about the Rules. Why? You don"t want to help us." I knew that much.
„No, but it seems I might need you after all," he said, his tone becoming bitter.
„Why all the games, Phoenix? Why did you do it?"
„You have yourself to thank for that. You showed me there is only one place for me in this world. I"d been fooling myself, granted. I"l not make this same mistake twice." He was suddenly interested in the cave wall, picking at a piece of stone, avoiding looking at me.
„I meant Lincoln. I know you were the one who sent Nahilius."
He shrugged, not surprised or worried that I"d figured it out. „It was mutual benefit. I see he made it here, anyway. I take it Nahilius is downward-bound."
I didn"t answer.
„Stil afraid to admit what you are?" He smiled. „Never did like the Cherubim."
I shook my head in disbelief, grasping what he was telling me. The exiles he"d given to Nahilius had all been Cherubs, as was Nahilius. I remembered Phoenix had some kind of grudge against them.
„You knew he"d be able to beat those exiles you sent after him. You wanted him to do it." I couldn"t hold back the anger, pulsing out of me, or the look of disgust.
„It was a win-win," he said, now holding my glare.
„You make me sick."
He took a step towards me, staring right through me. „I make you many things," he said, his voice travelling the length of me. I tried to ignore it, not be affected. But when he took the next step he opened a channel to himself.
„Don"t," I said, putting up my defences and mentally pushing him out. I was shaking with a frightening sensation of want. Then fear of want.
„Do you think I need the power to reach you?" He half laughed. „Do you think I don"t know how your thoughts drift to that night, to when you were in my arms?"
„I"m with Lincoln," I blurted out, surprising myself as much as Phoenix. He took a step back, his jaw clenched. I had said the wrong thing.
„You"re lying," he growled. „If you were with him you"d be weakened and you"re not." His eyes grew wide when I hesitated. „Oh," he said.
I bit down on my lip.
„My plan brought you together, you just haven"t …"
„It"s none of your business!" Why was it that everyone seemed to know so much about my love life just from looking at me?
„Wait. It doesn"t make …" he stopped.
I held my breath when his eyes churned with fury.
„You think you"re kindred souls, don"t you?" he snapped, taking those few steps back towards me until he was just centimetres away. „Don"t you?" he repeated, this time darkly bleeding into me as much compulsion to answer him as he could.
„Yes," I replied, for a moment under his spel .
He was silent as he contemplated my response. Finally, he straightened.
„Well, it makes sense you"d be willing to sacrifice your life again for him. I admit, though, I"m surprised you"d be wil ing to sacrifice his life, for you."
„What are you talking about?"
He laughed lightly, though his brow was furrowed. „Stil diving in head first without all the information. That naivety of yours is going to get you – or someone else – into trouble, Violet."
„Are you finished?" I asked, turning to walk away.
„Tell your people I"l give them the morning, but the Scriptures wil reveal themselves to me come tomorrow evening. If you want any chance to get hold of them you"l be in place then."
I walked away but felt the push. One step, two steps.
Move, move.
And I did, I kept going, I didn"t stop. But for just a second, I couldn"t resist. I dropped my guard and sucked in what he was sending. An explosion of lust. A feeling of unfettered bliss just as I"d remembered. My eyes rolled back in wicked delight as I forced my feet forward and stopped them turning back to him.
Like a damn junkie!
I snuck back into the north wing of the hotel, grateful to spot Zoe.
„Hey," I called out, running to catch up with her. „Where are you going?"
„
Everyone"s meeting with Azeem and some local Grigori. I guess we"l fil them in and find out if they can help us."
„Oh."
„You okay? You look wasted."
„Yeah. Umm … I think I might skip this one. Can you tell Griffin and Lincoln that I was too exhausted. I"l be in my room if anyone needs me."
„Sure. I"l stop by and get you on the way to dinner if you want?" she offered.
„Thanks," I called after her as she hurried off. She didn"t want to miss any action. Pity she"d already missed today"s main event.
By the end of tonight I was going to have to explain to everyone that I"d wondered off to have a little one-on-one time with Phoenix. But before that came the harder task. I was going to have to explain it to myself.
When I made it back to my room, I really was exhausted. I had no idea what was going on with my body clock or what time it was. I turned on the shower, undressed and sat in the bath with the water pelting down and random tears falling.
My life is not how I imagined it would be. In some ways, I was starting to like being Grigori. I mean the power was great. The strength alone gave me confidence I"d never had before, and knowing I could sense beings before they arrived was a bonus, too. The obvious downside was that I knew a whole lot more bad was coming my way. And Phoenix.
I tried to keep things black and white, but – as everyone is always telling me – nothing ever is. I loved Lincoln – absolutely, totally, jump-off-a-cliff for him, loved him – even when I"d shared that time with Phoenix. But …
There is always a but.
Phoenix and I had been friends. Really good friends. When I felt like there was no one else, he was there. I know now that he had been lying to me through a lot of it and I could never forgive him for forcing me to choose life as a Grigori when he could have healed Lincoln himself. Of course if he had healed Lincoln he would have probably had the power over Lincoln that he now held over me and … I was doubtful he"d have procrastinated for too long about reinstating Lincoln"s wounds.
And, I couldn"t help it, there was a part of me that was drawn to Phoenix. I"ve told myself it"s just his abilities, his pull of seduction and floods of lust, that he influences me and controls my emotions, but it"s more than that. I was unhealthily aware of those things yet stil unable to resist. And as bad as this might sound – it wasn"t even him so much as his power to make it all go away.