Six o’clock alarm. This morning I feel different. I feel ready. I feel ready to be different. It’s the last day of school. I have been waiting for this day. Finally, the end of high school, and the beginning of adulthood. Today, I want to be different.
I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I have been hiding for long enough. I pushed my hair behind my ears, revealing my high cheek bones. I touched the sides of my face, rubbing down gently. Maybe, I am pretty. I wonder what people would say if they really saw me.
I went to my closet and pulled out a never before worn skirt my aunt bought me. She is much younger than my mom and tends to buy “younger”, more fashionable clothes. Why did I never wear this, it’s cute? I put it on. I remember now. The skirt stopped just above my knees. I don’t like to show my legs. I looked at my legs. Why don’t I show my legs? Actually, I have nice legs. I exercise a lot to preoccupy my mind causing my legs to be very tone. They almost sparkle with a golden shimmer. And their tone is so flawless… probably because they have never been exposed to injury. Oh well, today I’m wearing this skirt.
I went back to the closet to find a top. I pulled out a matching baby tee. It was a tad bit tighter than I usually wear my shirts, yet it looked good with the skirt. I grabbed a pair of wedges my aunt bought me. I looked in the mirror. I turned to the side. Then, I slid the wedges off…too much! I grabbed a pair of slip-ons. They look fine and are comfortable. I don’t want to look like I’m trying too hard.
Now for the hair, I went to the bathroom. I put some products on my hair to enhance my curls. Then, I pulled back the top and pinned it so it could fall messily over the rest.
Now you can see my face. My eyes are so defined, even without liner. I never even noticed the cat-like shape of them. I decided to put a little lip gloss on. The gloss added a little shimmer to my amber rose colored lips. My lips are not huge, but they are full. I stared at myself. Wow!
Just the little bit I did revealed so much of me. I got embarrassed by the sight. I have never shown myself like this. Maybe I should just take this all off and stop it. I can’t do this! What if they don’t like it? I will be the laughing stock of the year. At least the way I was, no one noticed me at all so I didn’t get talked about. No, I’m not changing. I have to know. Am I pretty? Will they “see” me? Can I fit in? Before I leave high school as a textbook, only used as a reference, I have to know.
I walked into the kitchen.
“Good morning Missy.” My mom said as she turned towards me. “Wow, Missy you look so beautiful!” She was grinning from ear to ear.
It has been a while since I made her smile like that. I bent my head down. I expected a response, but it was still uncomfortable to have the extra attention.
“And your hair…it is so cute!” She said, as she touched one of my bouncing curls. “Is something special happening today? I know it’s your last day, but I don’t remember any events?”
I could tell she was being genuine and not making fun of my change.
“No Mom, I just wanted to do something different, with it being the last day and all.”
She looked relieved. I suppose she thought she forgot something. That would be catastrophic. Even as busy as she is, she doesn’t give way to forgetfulness.
“Okay, have a seat and I’ll bring your breakfast.”
I sat down and looked back at her scurrying around the kitchen. She was still smiling.
My dad walked in. “Good morning. How is everybody?” He was looking at a paper.
Mom handed him a cup of coffee and responded. “Good”
They exchanged a quick kiss. “And how are you Missy?” He always pushes for a response from me.
He glanced at me briefly, but before doing a double take. I smiled at his response. “Missy, you look beautiful. Having your hair pulled back really shows that cute little face.” He said and laughed a little.
“Tell her to stand up” my mom suggested.
“Why? What is she wearing?” He asked her a little concerned.
I found his response quite humorous and smirked at his expression. If I was a skimpy dresser, I don’t think he could take it.
Then he turned back to me and began moving in my direction. “Missy, stand up and show me what you’re wearing.”
I knew he was only concerned because Mom has never suggested it before. So I just did it without question. I took a princess bow to lighten the mood.
“Well aren’t you just a sight to see.” My dad said “You’re not trying to get a boy are you?”
I laughed.
“No Dad, I just wanted to try something different for the last day.”
He released the arch in his eyebrow. “Well, you look nice, Honey. Have a good last day. And I will see you all later on today.”
He spoke to Phillip on his way out.
Phillip walked in the kitchen. Of course, he is always last. He likes to sleep as long as possible. As soon as he got in the kitchen good, his eyes zoomed in on me. A huge grin spread across his face.
“That’s what I’m talking about Sis, you look hot!” He laughed. He walked over and stood behind my chair and put his hands on my shoulders. “So why’d you decide to get loose?” He asked wearing a “Kool-Aid” smile.
I slapped his side and looked down to hide the red I felt entering my cheeks. “You are too silly for words. I’m not getting loose. I just wanted to try something different for the last day that’s all.”
He bent down and whispered in my ear. “You’re going to make Kevin reconsider his entire life. You will make him look like the beast.” I smiled.
Phillip always has tried to build my confidence. I love him for that. “Thanks Phillip.” I put my hand on his hand. He leaned over me and gave me a kiss on my temple.
Next, he went to mom who was now sitting at the table. “Wow Mom, when are you going to start getting older?” He gave her a hug from behind and kissed her temple as well.
“Boy, you are just full of flattery today, aren’t you? What do you want?”
Phillip laughed. “Nothing Mom, it’s not every day you get to wake up and be surrounded by such beauty. I feel blessed…truly blessed.” He gave a sly smile.
“Are you ready, blessed Phillip?” I asked. It was already time to go.
“I was born ready” he replied as he grabbed some of Mom’s food to go.
“See you later” Mom bid us farewell.
When I walked on campus, it was like every eye was on me, including teachers’. I’m sure it is probably just me imagining things, but it feels so real.
As I got closer to the crowd, my peers welcomed me. “Hey Missy, I like your outfit.” “Nice skirt, Missy” “Love the hair, Missy” The compliments just kept coming. I don’t even know who said what. I just know I kept saying “Thank you”.
I was so overwhelmed by the attention, I had to get away. I hurried to the girl’s bathroom. I looked in the mirror. What are you doing Missy? It’s okay. I looked up at my reflection through the drops of water I had just splashed on my face. It’s okay. You look beautiful. I reapplied my lip gloss. With a final pinch of my eyes shut, I left the bathroom.
I made it to History class right with the bell. I sat in my chair. Kevin’s eyes immediately found me. I was scared to see his expression, yet I was curious as well. I took my test and passed the rest back. I seized the opportunity to look at him. He smiled at me. I could tell he liked my new appearance. Suddenly, I felt good. Real good.
I took my cover sheet from under my test and placed it over my answers. I looked over at him.
He gave another “please” look. This time I returned a look back.
“Sorry” I mouthed. I turned back around.
My whole body felt so good. It was like I was tingling all over with happiness. It is the feeling you get when you do the right thing, and you d
on’t care who dislikes you for it. It is the feeling of confidence. It is the feeling of the new me. And I like it. I smiled and closed my eyes to enjoy the moment. Now it’s back to business. I opened my eyes and aced the test. I walked out the class on cloud nine.
Then, I heard someone call my name. I turned to see Megan.
“Missy…I hope you didn’t think you were the only option.” Megan taunted.
The comment didn’t even begin to ring a bell. “What are you talking about, Megan?”
She squinted her eyes and crossed her arms, as if, she was irritated by my response. “The test…I hope you don’t think you stopped something. Don’t flatter yourself. We always have a Plan B. I just thought you should know.”
I grinned. “I’m flattered to know I was Plan A. That’s quite the compliment.”
I turned to leave, then stopped and returned my gaze upon her face which rendered a priceless amusement. “Oh and Megan, if I never see you again, it would be too soon.” I closed it with a cordial smile before walking away from the nonsense.
How pathetic could you really be? To think, I used to be that hopeless for Kevin. It is amazing how much better it shows up on someone else. The positive thing is: it’s over. It’s all over.
When we made it home, I checked the mail. I am still waiting for acceptance and scholarship letters from a few of my choice universities. As I shuffled through the mail, I noticed a letter addressed to my dad. Obviously, my dad receives mail all the time. Yet, this letter was different. The return address was from Dubai. I hurried inside to give the letter to him. My dad took it into his office I’m guessing to read it in confidence. He didn’t come back out until it was time for dinner.
After we did the usual dinner ritual, my dad opened the conversation.
“I received a letter today from Victor. He has requested my assistance in Dubai. The earliest I can get away is May 26th.”
I interrupted. “That’s the day after my graduation.”
He nodded. “I know. I didn’t want to miss it.”
I turned and looked back to my plate waiting for more information.
“Missy, I realize it’s the day after your graduation, but I was hoping you would consider coming with me.”
This suggestion caught me off guard. When my father first started doing missions, we would go with him. The past few years his mission trips have been too dangerous for us to attend. Judging from his mannerisms, this trip doesn’t come off as the standard “entertain the kids at an orphanage”. Why would he want me to go with him? Surely he sensed my thirst for the freedom following my graduation. Perhaps that was the reasoning behind his request, one final opportunity to spend time with me before I left on my quest to find myself. Whatever the reason, I know him well enough to know, if he didn’t need my presence, he wouldn’t have asked. Besides, it will be good to get away and spend some time with him before I leave for college.
I agreed.