‘I like this. Positive, optimistic. No doom or gloom.’
I hoped I was right. I also hoped it would be enough to keep Tony from searching for Justin so that he’d remain on campus where I could see him.
‘I can keep an eye on Rhode,’ he said. ‘You know, see if Justin is tailing him.’
‘I have to admit that’s exactly what I hoped.’
‘So let’s clarify. You’re sure Justin can’t hurt you?’ Tony checked. I sat down on the floor across from his bed.
‘No. He can’t. Not mortally anyway.’
It was vampire law: Justin could not hurt me because he loved me. But I did not love him, and bitter vampires were unpredictable and angry. They liked to destroy for fun; it eased their agony. My life as a ruler of vampires had educated me on this very fact.
Tony finally cleaned the cut on his face with an antiseptic wipe.
‘Here, let me help you,’ I said. As I dabbed at Tony’s skin, a certainty settled over me. Even though Justin’s love for me protected my person, he would do everything in his power to destroy those I cared for most.
I awoke with the glimmer of dawn, long before the rest of the campus was awake. While under the warmth of the covers in my dorm room, I held my palm out and trailed my fingertips along the calluses that ran over my palm. Working in the orchard had hardened my body. Even though I was travelling between times, my body carried the weight of my choices. Calluses are good. In case I need to wield those swords sooner than I’d like.
The memory of Suleen’s dying eyes, wide with fear, came to me. I sighed and got up, walking to the bay window. The campus trees swayed in the breeze, but unlike the trees at home they were not top-heavy with apples. I missed my sister and hoped that Fire was right, that when this was all over she could bring me back to the exact moment I had left. It sent goose bumps over me imagining Genevieve calling my name over and over in an empty orchard lane. Remember why you are here. You are here to protect your friends. Protect Rhode. I reached up to the tender spots on my neck where Justin had almost bitten me.
Various memories of Justin as a human boy came to me unbidden.
We stand outside Quartz dorm; the rain pelts the grass.
‘You look really sad,’ he says.
‘Do I?’
Justin lifts his chin up so the rain smacks his face even more directly. ‘Are you?’ he asks, still looking up.
I nod once. ‘A little.’
Justin had cared. He had been so gentle. He wasn’t bothered by the complexity of my vampire life, he had just wanted to get to know me.
‘You’re up early,’ Tracy said, interrupting the memory. She got up from her bed, shook her hair out and swept it back into a long ponytail.
‘Couldn’t sleep,’ I said.
She walked towards the bathroom with her shower kit.
‘No reason to be nervous. It’s just school.’
‘No,’ I said with a small smile. ‘No reason at all.’ Before morning assembly, I walked the long length of the Wickham farm to the barn. I had hidden the arrow from last night in my book bag. I followed the path, past the oversized pumpkins, past the tomatoes, and stopped at the spot where Rhode had pushed me to the ground. I just hoped no one was aiming an arrow at me today.
A maintenance Jeep pulled down to the last plot of the farm but otherwise it was empty. I reached up to the hole yesterday’s arrow had made in the barn. I untucked the arrow from last night and stuck the end into the hole. It fit exactly. Removing it, I examined the black stone tip. It was unmistakable – onyx.
I knew from previous experience that I could bury onyx in the ground but it would curse the place it touched. Onyx was dangerous that way. It sucked in the lifeblood, retained the power of the magic of any blood it touched. All the spells that Justin had ever performed would be stored in this stone now, because his blood had seeped into it. Whoever shot that arrow understood this. This stone would give whoever had it a blueprint of the magic Justin was performing.
I would have to burn the stone; it was the only way to release the spells and negative energy trapped inside. Later, I thought. Not out in the open like this. I packed it up and headed to the union for coffee. I would ask Rhode in assembly, first thing, about his arrow.
‘You have that look again,’ Tony said, sitting down beside me at assembly.
‘What?’
‘Like you might bite somebody.’
‘Interesting choice of words.’
I made sure to soften my face and tried to smile as the headmistress corralled the teachers together at the front of the auditorium. Yesterday Rhode had distinctly said the arrow wasn’t a Wickham one, which begged the question that had bothered me all night – who was that damned archer?
Even as a vampire, Justin was smart. He had learned or had found someone to teach him how to manipulate the elements. That was clear by his ease handling those black clouds. Justin’s confidence, which had once attracted me, had become exaggerated with his transformation. Charisma comes with a dark side, and in the vampire state that dark side becomes the only side.
You . . . don’t love me, do you?
I pushed Justin’s words out of my head. I didn’t want that Justin lingering in my mind; I would have to deal with him directly soon enough. Where the hell was Rhode?
He did me a favour – and walked in.
He sat in the front row next to some guys in the upper school that I did not recognize. He gestured with his hands and smiled brightly. I settled into my seat. He almost fell out of his chair laughing at someone. Wow. None of the grimacing unhappiness or furrowed eyebrows of old. A carefree young man with his whole future ahead of him.
A future that now was in danger.
‘There’s Rhode,’ Tracy whispered. She had sat down on the other side of me. ‘Ridiculous, right?’
‘I’m hotter than him,’ Tony said, leaning towards me on the other side. Tracy patted him on the hand.
‘Sure you are, Paint-Boy.’ Catching sight of his face, she did a double take. ‘Hey . . .’ she said, leaning across me and taking Tony’s chin by her fingers. She turned his head from side to side. ‘Where did you get that scratch?’
‘I fell,’ he said with a shrug. ‘Holding my portfolio. I tripped.’
Good lie.
Tracy shook her head with a bemused smile. Tony’s clumsiness was clearly endearing.
‘Typical,’ she said.
Headmistress Williams stood behind the podium and began her ‘first day of school’ speech. Rhode kept his back straight, listening to her words, without once looking around for me. How strange to be living in a universe where my soulmate did not remember me.
Once assembly ended, the mass exodus of students leaving the hall allowed Tony and me to speak privately. Ahead, by the door, a couple of girls talked to Rhode, toying flirtatiously with their hair. I wouldn’t have minded ripping it from their heads.
‘You’re doing the “I wanna bite you” face again,’ Tony said. He glanced at Tracy, who was huddled close to Kate and Claudia. They walked out of assembly and on to the quad.
‘I’m here to protect him,’ I said. I really didn’t like those girls talking to Rhode. Especially, the brunette with long legs. She touched Rhode’s shoulder, letting her hand linger a bit too long.
‘OK, Crazy,’ Tony said. ‘Whatever you say. But promise me, no more dagger eyes, OK? I’m going to the library.’
‘For what?’
‘I want to find out more about people who can use the elements. Manipulate water, fire, you know.’
‘I really doubt you’ll find much in the library here,’ I replied, still focused on the brunette who was now trailing her fingers from Rhode’s shoulder to his wrist.
‘Justin said that Sully guy used the elements.’
‘There’s a distinction. Suleen was the oldest vampire in existence.’
‘You said those Hollow dudes are old too.’
Tony’s mention of the Hollow Ones distracted me from my petty jeal
ous fit. It didn’t seem natural to hear their name coming out of his mouth. He was involved now, just as I had wished, and with that came the fear that he would be hurt.
We stepped outside the auditorium and I slipped on some sunglasses to shield the harsh sunlight. Tony kept watch on Tracy, who stood further out on the quad with Kate and Claudia.
‘There has to be something somewhere about why vampires choose to manipulate the elements,’ Tony continued.
‘They do it to feel closer to nature. Most learn to do it when they’ve stood outside the rotation of the world for too long. Imagine the control they experience when they can make the wind bend to their will. It makes them feel that they can be masters of their lives.’
Tony blinked at me. ‘OK . . . well, I guess that settles that.’ He shook his head, seeming to recharge with enthusiasm. ‘Still, a bit of research – it can’t hurt, right?’ Tony suddenly raised his voice by about thirty decibels. ‘And that’s when I said, “Hell, no. I will not go out with you. I like someone else, OK?”’
Tracy stood next to me.
‘Yes, well, you turned her down amicably,’ I said, going with it.
‘Someone asked you out?’ Tracy asked as we walked on to the pathway.
‘Don’t act so surprised. It happens all the time,’ Tony protested.
We walked across the quad with ten minutes before our first class. I scanned for Rhode. It nearly bowled me over to see him standing beneath the shade of a tree alone. He looked up from his hands and stared at me hard. As usual, the beauty in his blue eyes almost knocked me backwards. He took a step in my direction.
‘Um,’ was all I could get out.
‘Is Rhode coming to talk to you?’ Tracy said, and gripped my arm. I flinched from the residual pain of where Justin had wrapped his cold fingers around my flesh the night before. ‘We’ll give you some space,’ Tracy went on, and pulled at Tony’s arm.
‘Hey!’ he said, clearly not wanting to be taken away.
‘Morning,’ Rhode said to me.
This synthesis of Rhode, the dark, mysterious, always-knowing-more-than-me Rhode, was mixed with this modern boy wearing a collared shirt and jeans. I wanted to scream, ‘Don’t you know you were once a knight?! Tuck in your shirt!’
‘Are you doing OK? After your near-death experience?’ he asked.
If only he knew . . .
And OK? When did Rhode ever say ‘OK’?
He chuckled, trying to make light. I basked in the surprise of seeing him smile at me.
‘It’s not every day a hunter’s arrow is shot at my head,’ I managed to get out.
Rhode raised his eyebrows. ‘A hunter’s arrow. Impressive.’
Rhode was flirting with me.
‘Well, I don’t catch them as they fly through the air – not like some people I know.’
‘I hardly caught it in mid-air. It hit the building first,’ he said.
I had to stay focused. I needed the details of the arrow. ‘Yesterday, you said that the arrow wasn’t a Wickham team arrow.’
Rhode stiffened. ‘I did?’ he said, crossing his arms.
‘Yes. You said the—’
‘Forget that. Massively stupid comment. Of course it’s a Wickham arrow. Someone probably misfired, that’s all. What’s your first class?’ he asked.
‘French,’ I replied allowing him to change the subject.
‘Isn’t that something? Me too. What happened to your finger?’ he asked, and pointed at my shoddy Band Aid job.
‘Not sure. Caught it on something.’ Or hurt it in a fight with a murderous lunatic.
‘Guess I’ll have to watch out for you.’
My cheeks warmed and I prayed he wouldn’t see me blush. I couldn’t be so obvious.
‘So if you know so much about archery, do you shoot?’ He kept pace with me, stride for stride.
‘No. Not at all,’ I said. ‘Never shot an arrow in my life.’
‘Want me to teach you? Tomorrow. On the archery field.’
Hathersage, England, at target practice.
Rhode’s hands on mine, my back presses against his stomach as the sunset bleeds over the rolling hills. He holds my hands steady, the bow vibrates, and we’re about to let the arrow go . . .
‘Definitely,’ I said.
We reached French class, but Rhode hesitated at the door.
‘Après vous,’ he said.
CHAPTER 7
When a vampire is made, the countdown begins. A countdown to madness. The mind is all that remains active in the vampire body. The senses go, the ability to feel happiness and joy – those go too. No one knows if the soul remains, deep down and hidden.
The mind wanes slowly.
Like polished silver tarnishing.
Even the most brilliant shine will blacken over time.
12 January, 1725, Hathersage, England – the years of the Vampire Queen
The hour was early – just past sunset. As a vampire queen I spent my nights lying in bed, ruminating over the moments in my life when I had been most happy. Meeting Rhode, falling in love, moments with my family, dancing with Rhode at countless balls. I sat up in bed. Outside the window, flecks of snow whipped past. The house was utterly silent. It was a house of the dead. I listened to this melancholy silence as I tiptoed barefoot down the long darkened hallway.
I stepped out of the back door, immune to the icy stones of the terrace, past the tiny cemetery where a coating of snow lined the tops of the tombstones. I descended the steep hill that abutted my home. I had a very clear destination. The land veered to the right and I followed it. My white sleeping gown skirted over the frozen grass.
I walked until I reached a small river at the foot of another hill. The water swirled and curled though the darkened valleys of Hathersage. The river crept by and the evening cast snowy light on to the rocks and branches. I stepped down the embankment, my feet squished into the mud. The gooey consistency made me sink lower into the ground. I stepped into the running water.
I must remember this date. I wiggled my toes in the current. As I crossed to the middle of the water, it deepened to my ankles, and then to my knees. I stepped through from one side of the river to the other. Back and forth, back and forth. The pebbles and rocks dug at the bottom of my feet, but no, it was most definite:
My sense of touch was gone.
I dropped my gown so the water soaked through the hem. The icicles on the trees hung in sharp, dewy spears. I stopped pacing the river and lay down in that shallow stream. There wasn’t really enough water to float, but I arched my back, trying anyway. I submerged myself to the tip of my nose. Flat discs of ice floated past my eyes. Hours . . .
Passed.
The current would never bite at my skin again. The churning of the silt would never circle over my toes, nor would the rushing, splashing or bubbling water.
It was over.
Through the spaces between the branches, the stars dimmed – sunrise approached. I waded out of the water and headed back home up the hill.
The sky had turned a lighter shade of purple. Atop the hill in the distance, my great house came into view. I stopped. Next to me, at the end of the long lane leading to the house, Rhode’s longbows sat in a pile.
I’d never shot an arrow before, but now I picked up a bow and loaded one. I found the target in the distance, the black bullseye, and focused. My hair, which was frozen now in thick cords of ice, lifted off my shoulders. I had seen Rhode do this countless times. Raise your right elbow, find your target, shoot, hit, he had said. With a snap, I released the arrow. I did it again and again. Thump, thump, thump – the arrows sailed through the air.
It took me two hundred tries to hit the bullseye. After that, every single arrow went home. The stars travelled over the curve of the sky until it lightened from purple to pink. I hadn’t been out for the sunrise in so long; it was more dangerous than the sun at midday. Dawn’s light could mean death for the inexperienced vampire. I pierced the bullseye again as a yellow light broke ove
r the rolling hills.
‘Is this where you’ve been?’ Rhode asked from behind me.
I let an arrow fly. Whap – right into the centre.
‘Lenah, it will be sunrise in moments.’
I bent over and picked up another arrow. Rhode grabbed my wrist and focused on the tips of my index and middle finger. A thick red indentation slit the skin; blood seeped through.
‘Lenah, stop.’
He wrested the arrow from me and I flinched away from him.
‘I will not be controlled!’ I yelled. ‘You will not be the master of my life!’
Rhode’s eyes flickered with worry.
No, I did not want to do this to him. Immediately I wrapped my arms around him and held his face to mine. The faintest warmth pooled on the apple of my cheeks – a small heat rippled again and again, until it dissipated away leaving an icy, familiar chill.
‘I’m so sorry,’ I said pulling back with a small shake of my head. ‘I went down to the river. And I could not feel it. I have lost, lost . . .’
‘The sense of touch,’ Rhode finished for me.
I placed the bow on to the ground; my blood had stained the fibre. He took my hand into his.
‘I feared it for so long. And now it has come,’ I said.
‘You will always have me,’ Rhode said, and we started back up for the great stone manor in the distance. ‘I hope that gives you some comfort.’
If I was human, the wound on my fingers would have throbbed and ached for weeks. By the time I assessed the cut, it was healed.
‘Will I ever stop feeling your warmth?’ I asked.
Rhode did not answer.
‘Will I?’ I pressed, knowing that vampires who were in love could still feel the warmth of each other’s touch even when the rest of their body had gone cold.
When we reached the house, Rhode led me into the darkened foyer and answered me with a kiss. A kiss I could not taste but that warmed my chest – a kiss that told me in one gentle gesture what he could not utter aloud: one day I would no longer be able to feel his embrace.
Present Day – Wickham