Read Fearless Page 12


  Jordan lowers his head into his hands and murmurs, ‘It’s my destiny.’

  Amber clarifies: ‘He thinks it’s his destiny to always love Ebony but never have her.’

  He peers at Amber, his eyes troubled and sunken into his face. It surprises me that he can’t see how much this girl is hurting to see him suffering.

  ‘He told me he’d rather be dead than spend his life in perpetual heartbreak.’

  ‘He said that before he learned of this?’ I ask Amber by way of confirmation. When she nods, my blood boils. ‘Do you think Ebony will enjoy being free at the cost of your death?’

  He lifts his head, his eyes wide and round, as if this has not occurred to him before.

  ‘Ebony could never be happy knowing you gave your life so she could be free. She’s your Guardian, not the other way round. I’m sorry that on the day of my arrest I made you responsible for her safety. I only meant until she came into her powers, or accepted who she was. And I’m sorry I was absent for so long. After Ebony returned to Avena she would begin watching over you, Jordan. You would have a Guardian for the first time and your life would improve. That was our deal.’

  ‘Why are you the one making all my decisions? Who put you in charge of my life? Don’t I have Free Will? If I want to do this, you can’t stop me.’

  ‘True, but if no one agrees to carry you to the gates, it would make your willing sacrifice impossible.’

  He gets up and storms around the room. He hadn’t considered how he was going to traverse the vast and changing landscape of the Crossing. ‘How is that fair? I thought you angels were democratic. I say we take a vote like Gabe wanted before you realised I was listening, and as well as accepting my choice, I get transportation.’ He notices Jez returning to the room and nods. ‘Good, we’re all here. Now we can vote.’

  ‘What for?’ she asks.

  ‘Everyone in this room right now is going to vote – “Yes” for my freedom to choose, or “No”, this ends here, I get no choice. And if it’s “Yes”, it includes transporting me through the Crossing.’

  ‘I don’t know about this, Jordan,’ Jez says, quickly backed up by Tash and Jerome. Isaac goes to say something but Shae stops him with a razor-sharp look.

  ‘Vote in secret, if that’s your problem.’

  Everyone in the room appears uncomfortable. ‘Jordan,’ Michael says, ‘let Thane explain why a vote is not a good idea.’

  ‘OK. So what’s your problem with it?’

  I lay my open palms on Jordan’s shoulders as I try to explain, ‘Because we will have to live with our decision for the rest of time.’

  Sarcastic laughter rips out of him. ‘You poor immortals, how tough you have it.’

  Amber slices through his response. ‘We’re the ones who will have to face Ebony, you selfish moron.’

  He spins around and confronts her. ‘At least she’ll be free and you can face her. Time will help her forgive you, and time will help her forget me.’

  ‘Jordan –’ I try again to talk him out of forcing this vote – ‘you have many reasons to live; you just don’t yet know what they are.’

  He seems to think about this, but then looks at Shae for her vote. ‘You first.’

  ‘Wait,’ I call out.

  He spins round, looks into my eyes and pleads, ‘Come on, Thane, let them speak.’

  I take a deep breath and sit. ‘All right, but I will go first.’

  I glance around the conference table, where everyone has taken a seat again. ‘No one can begin to measure how much I need to bring Ebony home. As long as Luca has her, he wins. Every moment we delay could make a difference to the final outcome, but I cannot willingly condone the cost of a mortal life. I will find another way. I have specialists gathering their recommendations on how best to proceed right now.’

  ‘Yeah, yeah, I’m sure they’ll be very helpful. So what’s your vote?’

  ‘No. My vote is NO.’

  He looks at Shae. ‘Well, this should even the score.’

  Shae doesn’t disappoint him. She casts a YES. Beside her, Isaac does too, forging a brief apology of sorts: I can’t vote against my wife’s family, and Ebony needs to come home, whatever the cost.

  If it were me – my willing heart – the gate required to rebuild itself, how would you vote?

  That’s not fair, Thane.

  I let it go. He has the right to make his own decision; I’m just not sure he has done that.

  Tash votes NO, Uri YES. Michael, Jerome and Sami all vote NO. Good, five to three so far. But then Gabe gives Jordan a YES. Jez says NO, which leaves Solomon, the last of the angels. He votes YES. It’s a good result, except Jordan calls out, ‘My vote counts too, and it’s YES.’

  ‘Now it’s even,’ Shae says.

  Everyone turns to Amber, sitting silently between Jordan and Jez. The moment she realises her vote is the decider, her head starts swinging from side to side. She drags her chair backwards, flicking glances at the door. ‘Don’t look at me,’ she says with the eyes of a fox caught in a trap. ‘I’m not voting.’

  ‘Amber, come on,’ Jordan coaxes. He points round the table. ‘They did, and it wasn’t easy for them. Now you have to do this.’

  ‘But, Jordan, it’s the deciding vote. It’s all on me. I can’t, OK?’

  She gets up to leave, but Shae blocks her exit. ‘Our votes mean nothing if you don’t give yours.’

  Amber searches the table for an ally. Jez smiles at her sadly. Jerome tries to reassure her with a wink and half a grin.

  Tash says, ‘You have already made up your mind, sweetie. It’s all right to say it aloud. Whichever way this goes, we will accept the decision, right, Thane?’ I nod, and she turns to Shae for her answer.

  ‘Of course,’ Shae says.

  ‘Jordan?’ Tash pierces him with her dark opal eyes.

  He shrugs. ‘That was the agreement, so if the vote goes against me, I’ll have no choice but to accept it.’

  Silent tears trickle down Amber’s face. She snags her bottom lip into her mouth as she stares at Jordan with big eyes. ‘Just so you know, I think you’re a great guy. A moron. But great in many ways, like how you love Ebony so completely that you’re willing to die for her … Oh my God, Jordan, that’s the stuff of epic love stories and poetry.’ She looks away for a moment and mumbles under her breath, ‘Damn you for putting me in this position.’

  Tears are streaming now. ‘I love Ebony too. Everyone knows we’ve been close friends all our lives. We’re like sisters, always have been, always … But I couldn’t do what you’re willing to do. Maybe it’s because I have family and I know it would kill them to lose me. I don’t know.’ She inhales a shuddering breath and I find myself holding mine. So far, nothing Amber has said indicates with certainty which way she will vote. And her thoughts are a mess, floundering in a cesspool of raw emotion. ‘I know you want this so much, but I can’t be the one to send you to your death. I’m sorry, Jordan, but my vote is NO.’

  I exhale the breath I’m holding in a big sigh of relief. Jordan gets out of his chair and stares at Amber, too angry and upset to block his thoughts.

  Michael intercepts him with calming hands on his shoulders. ‘You have your answer, Jordan. Now you must leave this to us to handle.’

  He pulls away. ‘This is bullshit! I wish I could take myself to those damn gates! I wish I didn’t need help from any of you!’ His eyes shift to Amber again. ‘Why didn’t you vote YES? What’s the matter with you? Don’t you want Ebony back?’

  She runs out, her footsteps pounding the tiles from here to the front door. He goes after her and grabs her arm, but she pulls away.

  ‘Stop!’ he yells. ‘Amber, come back, you gotta change your vote. Amber, please.’

  On the outside deck she stops and calls over her shoulder, ‘Just so there’s no confusion, my vote is still NO.’

  18

  Jordan

  Tomorrow in the early pre-dawn Thane will take three teams to Skade to get Ebony back, and I wo
n’t be going with them. It sucks, but it seems like there’s nothing I can do now.

  It’s quiet and peaceful out here, lounging on chairs on the front deck with Thane. It’s night-time, and the only sound is coming from the nocturnal critters going about their business in the surrounding rainforest. By the time summer comes, most of the forest will have grown back, probably thicker than before Thane destroyed it with his power.

  The night sky is drenched with stars that I can’t stop looking at, but it’s cold and I shrug deeper into the blanket Thane brought out a few minutes ago when I started shivering.

  Thane closes his eyes and sighs. I hear his disappointment. I feel it. It’s reeking from his pores. He wanted the teams to leave for Skade straight after the meeting ended, but Gabe argued for waiting a few hours to give the engineers and biochemists time to finish their reports. He offered to get them himself and convinced enough of the angels to vote with him.

  That’s the reason we’re sitting out here like a pair of losers, waiting for the hours to tick past while God only knows what Luca’s doing to Ebony right now.

  This is the first time Thane’s been still since the abduction, since probably well before that. According to Tash, after they’d rescued Ebony’s parents Thane had his crew flying round the clock across Skade to reach Ebony in time. Maybe a few hours’ rest will be a good thing in the end, make him stronger for whatever’s ahead.

  I still hate Thane for keeping the truth from me, but if … what am I saying? Oh God, WHEN he brings Ebony back, I’ll forgive him everything.

  ‘You don’t look so good, Jordan. How are your burns?’ he asks without opening his eyes. ‘Other than being chained to a wall, you still haven’t told me how it happened.’

  ‘Mate, it’s not rocket science. The cuffs were metal and too tight – they dug into my flesh.’

  He opens his eyes and raises his eyebrows like he’s waiting for the rest. ‘Your wrists have third-degree burns, Jordan. They may not heal by themselves. If you don’t want me to take care of them, go to a doctor.’ His eyes rove over my face. ‘Of course, I won’t ask you as many questions as a doctor might.’

  Hint. Hint.

  ‘I’m not sure how long I will be away,’ he continues. ‘Mind if I just check them to make sure infection isn’t setting in?’

  Jeez, I wish he would shut up about my burns. Since last night the pain has gone beyond hurting. They’re killing me now.

  ‘Jordan, the reason you’re shivering is because you’re running a temperature. That’s not a good sign.’

  I suppose he’s right. The burns should be getting better by now, not worse. I slither my arms out from under the blanket. Surprise registers for a moment before he carefully pushes back my jacket sleeves and unravels the bandages.

  The smell is the first thing that hits me. Ugh, gross, it’s enough to make me puke. But Thane remains stoic as he takes in the raised red flesh with shiny black patches and squishy white areas of pus circling both my left and right wrists. He looks up, and bright blue daggers of steel pierce my eyes. He then opens his mouth to say something, but it’s as if he sucks the words back into his mouth and shakes his head instead.

  ‘Mate, you’ve got no right to be angry at me.’

  ‘About this?’ He points to my wrists with an open hand. ‘Oh yes, I do.’

  ‘I can see they’re bad.’

  ‘At least your eyes are working, unlike your brain. How is your sense of smell holding up?’

  ‘You’re not funny.’

  ‘That’s because I’m not joking. You couldn’t smell this when you showered?’

  He’s starting to freak me out. ‘Can you fix them or not?’

  ‘Tonight, I believe I can, but by dawn the fever from your poisoned blood would be giving you seizures. One look at these hands in a hospital emergency department and you would be heading straight for surgery.’

  ‘To clean them up?’

  ‘To amputate.’

  For a few seconds I can’t say anything. He’s gotta be exaggerating. But then I remember. ‘Shit, you don’t lie.’

  His face softens.

  ‘I didn’t realise.’

  He lowers his glowing hands to my wrists and spends the next twenty minutes or so drawing out the infection, detoxifying my poisoned blood and healing my wounds. When he finishes I hold my wrists up under the soft porch light. My skin is pink, smooth and as good as new. I glance at him. He looks tired, like healing me has drained him. ‘Thanks. I really mean it.’

  He nods and smiles with half his mouth and ruffles my hair in the way he used to when we were mates. He tilts his head suddenly and his smile turns to a frown as he stares into the starry sky.

  ‘What’s up?’

  He walks to the deck railing and turns to look up over the house. ‘Gabriel is coming.’

  ‘What for?’

  ‘I don’t know.’

  I soon hear the brisk swish-swish of Gabe’s big wings as he flies over and touches down on the lawn. The look on his face is deadly serious and my stomach drops.

  ‘Gabriel,’ Thane says, not waiting, ‘what’s happened?’

  ‘We need to talk.’ He gives me a pointed look. ‘You don’t mind if I take my brother for a walk, Jordan?’

  It’s hard to tell if this is a question or not. ‘I could just go to my room,’ I volunteer.

  But Gabe has other ideas. ‘No need. Why spoil a pleasant evening?’ He shifts his eyes to Thane’s. ‘Walk with me, brother?’

  I don’t like the look of this. There’s something in Gabe’s eyes I haven’t seen before. I can’t help but wonder what it is. Thane gives me a tight smile before he walks down the few steps to where his brother is waiting.

  ‘What is it that you can’t say in front of Jordan?’ I hear him ask as soon as they begin walking.

  Gabe exhales a long shaky breath, making the hairs at the back of my neck stand on end. Shit, what can be wrong now? It’s gotta be about Ebony. He’s learned something. The reports, they must be devastating. The look in his eyes – oh hell – it’s fear.

  Keeping my thoughts scrambled, I follow at a distance that I can still hear from. Thane’s voice is sharp, demanding, and growing more anxious. ‘Gabe? Did you meet with the engineers? You’re worrying me. Get to the point.’

  ‘Yes, I have the report and a solution, but there’s something more personal I need to talk to you about, something I should have mentioned before now.’

  They reach the start of the forest when Thane stops. ‘Go on.’

  ‘You and I both need a clear head going into this mission, and that’s why I have to tell you …’

  My brain is racing at warp speed, trying to figure out what Gabe’s confession is about.

  ‘Remember the message you gave me for Ebony?’ he says.

  Message? There’s only one message worthy of this conversation. Holy shit!

  They start walking again. I run to keep up, stepping as lightly as I can over the damp forest floor, madly scrambling my thoughts. I can’t miss this. Has Thane caught on what message Gabe is talking about yet? What could have stopped Gabe from telling her? Ebony practically begged him for it. I get a mental image of sitting in the Lambo with Ebony scooting into my arms, both of us in shock after the dark force chased us home from Zavier’s place that first time. We’d just seen two cops incinerated in their car. Unbeknown to us, Gabe was waiting in the garage, watching in the darkness while we held each other and our heart rates slowed down. Nothing happened, except in Gabe’s creepy imagination. Did he withhold his brother’s vital message over that?

  The judgemental jerk!

  It gets darker suddenly. I look up. Clouds, sizzling with electricity, are zooming across the sky, obscuring the stars, the moon and anything else as they gather above the forest.

  Goosebumps break out all over me.

  Nothing about this developing storm is natural.

  It hits fast, with lightning illuminating the sky in silver and purple streaks. A bolt, as thick
as a telegraph pole, shoots straight into the forest, splitting an ancient blackbutt tree down its centre. Debris scatters as if a bomb has exploded. The force knocks me off my feet.

  In a pleading tone Gabe yells out something I can’t understand. Brushing away chunk-sized splinters, I get up and run towards their voices. But the sky opens up again. Purple lightning sizzles close a split second before it smashes into the ground. Trees shed their bark as thunder booms and rolls, shaking the ground from one end of the forest to the other. The pounding is so penetrating my ears ache. I cover them with my hands and crawl across the forest floor towards the blinding light.

  I find the two of them in full angelic glow. I throw an arm over my eyes and watch them, facing each other, legs apart, wings shifting uneasily from their backs. I can just make out who is whom. Thane is holding a branch up over his shoulder like a spear he’s threatening to drive into Gabe’s chest.

  ‘You kept the message to yourself?’ he accuses. ‘The whole time I was absent?’

  Gabe shrugs, his palms out in front of him in a gesture of peace. After what he did, it’s pathetic. He hears something and looks up. A bolt of white lightning shoots straight down from the sky. It crackles and hisses through the canopy, setting branches on fire as it forks into two, sending unfathomable streams of energy into the ground either side of him.

  The Earth shakes, tossing me backwards again. Falling hard, I scramble to a tree, then think better of it and huddle behind a boulder.

  Gabe gets up, his hands now shaking. ‘Brother, listen to me. I’m trying to apologise. But I need to explain my reasons.’

  ‘You knew how much I needed Ebony to have that message. You were with her every day; you must have known her doubts, seen how hard it was for her to believe without her memories. I couldn’t give her back her own, but I could give her mine, and that message was so much more.’

  Thane shakes his head in utter disbelief. The poor bastard had no idea. Well, nobody did. With polished all-black eyes glinting, Thane lifts the branch higher.

  ‘I found them together! I didn’t want to tell you. I knew it would hurt.’