Read Fearless Page 26


  When it’s finally over and my mind quietens its frantic pace, I take a deep breath and savour the moment to absorb what just happened, to analyse what his gift will mean to me. The difference it will make.

  I open my eyes to find the entire one thousand angels on their knees around the platform and looking up at me with anticipation on their faces.

  But I only have eyes for one of them, and right now he’s watching me, and weeping. I slip down beside him, wipe his tears away with my fingers, cup his face in my hands, and tell him the nature of our High King’s extraordinary gift. ‘My love, I remember everything. I even remember that my name is not Ebony.’

  He clasps his hands over mine and brings them to his lips, where he kisses first one palm and then the other. He’s trying to keep his emotions in check, but I can see how much this means to him. I feel it, and it makes me want to hold him and weep until I’m spent.

  He looks up at our High King. ‘Thank you for this great gift, my lord.’

  The High King smiles and invites everyone to stay for a banquet. ‘Today we celebrate the future,’ he says, ‘and we honour the return of an upcoming queen, who shall from this day forward hold the title “Princess of Hope”.’

  Everyone claps and cheers. The atmosphere is so buoyant in the amphitheatre that some angels begin to sing, while others take a partner and dance. Tables are brought in with platters of food and wine.

  Nathe, as I now remember I always called him, pulls me into his arms and covers my face in butterfly kisses, exactly as I recall he used to do each morning to wake me up. When his lips meet mine, his kiss is so tender I could cry.

  But his sweet tender kisses drive me insane with longing, and when he lifts his head I slide my hand around his neck and bring his mouth back down to mine, ‘More,’ I whisper. ‘I want more. Remember, I have my memories back.’

  He tosses his head back and laughs, but then he kisses me in the way I remember. My head spins as desire flares through my body. Shifting his mouth to my ear he murmurs three words, that up until this moment I didn’t know I’ve been waiting almost seventeen years to hear him say: ‘Welcome back, Ebrielle.’

  41

  Jordan

  The first thing I do when I get home is take a shower. I peel my clothes off, leaving the pieces wherever they drop. They’re rags now anyway. Maybe I’ll have enough energy to throw them out tomorrow. Maybe after a long sleep I won’t ache so much. Solomon held me so damn tight the whole way that I got bruises, and then bruises on my bruises.

  I step under the hot jet, running my hand over the small scars Jez purposely left on my back, so that when time passes and it all seems like a dream, I’ll have something to remind me that what happened was real.

  Those scars will also remind me what my mother did for me. As if I could ever forget that experience. At least now I know the truth. She loved me all along.

  I slide to the floor and let hot water hammer over my head and swirl down the drain. I don’t move for ages. The heat soothes my thoughts as well as my aching muscles.

  I should be ecstatic to know Ebony is out of Skade and safe for the rest of, well, eternity. And I’m happy for her. Of course I am. It’s weird though. Part of me is thrilled, but the rest is … I don’t know, in a crazy-sad place.

  When I had Mum in my arms, all the old feelings from when I was a kid came back, like her warmth, her smell, that sense of safety you get when your mum tells you everything is going to be all right.

  I turn my face up to the hot spray. At least here, in the privacy of my room, in this clear glass cube, no one can see me cry.

  42

  Jordan

  It’s been a couple of days since they returned from Empyrean. I had just dropped Amber home after school and arrived back at the house. They walked in holding hands, Shae and Isaac right behind them. Somehow Ebony (as I still thought of her then) looked taller. It could have been the high-heeled boots and tight jeans that made her legs seem to go forever, or her long hair, redder than ever, tumbling to her waist, or the way she seemed at ease, comfortable in her own skin finally. I don’t know. But even her eyes had changed. They’d become deeper, brighter violet, and her normally bronze skin, well, she glowed.

  She was Ebrielle now. She had found herself.

  And tonight we’re celebrating her safe return.

  By the time I throw on a pair of jeans and a white button-up shirt and head downstairs, the party’s in full swing, with angels and Brothers taking up space in just about every downstairs room.

  I step into the living room just as Amber arrives with her mum and dad. They’ve brought Ebony’s parents with them, and when Ebony sees them walking in, she launches into her dad’s arms, checking him out for injuries at the same time. Satisfied that he’s OK, she moves on, taking her mum’s face in her hands. They nod seriously at each other, and then they laugh and cry. Their emotions fuel the room so that even the Holy Cross Brothers tear up.

  Amber spots me watching from the opposite side of the room and waves. Next thing I know, she’s making her way over. I catch myself looking for her through groups of angels and Brothers and pieces of furniture. Something stirs in my gut. An awareness. A sense of something exciting. A perception of maybe … pleasure? It happens every time I see her now.

  And, according to Thane, I don’t have to worry about Skinner hurting Amber any more. He won’t be using her to make me do what his employer wants. Prince Luca is dead, giving Adam a second chance at a normal life, and he’s promised Thane that a normal life is all he wants.

  Amber arrives and smiles up at me. ‘Hey.’

  ‘Hey.’

  ‘It’s so wonderful to have her back,’ she says, ‘but I can’t help wondering how long they’ll be staying.’

  I shrug. I don’t know. I don’t want to ask.

  ‘Well,’ she says, ‘I’m just glad you got back in one piece. You’ll be here with me now when …’

  I lean towards her, bumping her shoulder with mine. ‘Feel like some fresh air?’

  She nods. ‘Sure.’

  We head to the back door, but there’s a line to get into the kitchen. Uriel and Tash, with three of their five daughters, who like their parents apparently love to cook, are serving dinner off the bench.

  Someone lays their hands on my shoulders from behind and starts kneading my muscles. Without looking, I can tell it’s Ebony. I would know those fierce fingers anywhere. I glance up at her, taking her fingers into my hand, and she smiles at me. Not so long ago I would have read this as a sign that she wanted me in a romantic way. But I get it now. I finally understand how the Guardian bond heightens my emotions and my senses when we’re in close proximity.

  And even though she’s talking to me, her eyes are wandering off, seeking him out.

  Thane must sense her. He comes out of his study with Michael in tow and stops, looks straight at her and winks. She kisses Amber’s cheek, then mine and whispers, ‘I’ll catch you both later.’

  As I watch her walk over to Thane there’s a sense of freedom inside me I’ve never felt around her before. It’s such a relief that I smile and sigh contentedly.

  ‘Still can’t take your eyes off her,’ Amber remarks, her mouth drawn tight, her eyes unable to meet mine. And suddenly she’s off, manoeuvring through the angels in the food line, pushing her way out the back door.

  By the time I make it out she’s halfway to the stables. ‘Hey, wait up!’

  She stops. I read this as a good sign and run over. But when I try to take her hand she turns and glances into the shadows around the barn.

  I thrust my hands into my jeans pockets. ‘I was smiling at Ebony walking away because, well, for the first time since I met her, I felt nothing. I had no obsessive thoughts. Amber, all I’m feeling around Ebony now is a sense of relief that I’m finally, finally, free.’

  ‘Free?’

  ‘Yep. You see, something happened between us that’s hard to explain.’

  ‘I heard about it. Everyone has. Ebo
ny healed you and brought you back to life with her tongue in your mouth.’

  ‘That’s right and … wait … No, there was no –’

  ‘Jordan, don’t get me wrong, I’m really grateful Ebony saved your life.’

  I try to take her hand again but she pulls away. ‘Listen, Amber, please. There was something special about the kiss of life Ebony gave me, but not in the way you’re thinking. It’s as if she not only kick-started my heart but somehow freed me from my obsession with loving her.’

  ‘Really?’

  I nod. ‘Ebony didn’t just give me my life back that day, she gave me back my ability to love.’

  Her eyes search mine. ‘Jordan, what are you saying?’

  ‘That I don’t love Ebony any more. And I think … No, I mean I know that I’m … falling in love with you.’

  She reaches for my hands. ‘Stop talking,’ she says. ‘Don’t say another word. Just come here and kiss me.’

  And with a grin I can’t keep off my face, I do exactly as she says.

  43

  Ebony

  The party is fun, with lots of angels turning up and heaps of Brothers from the monastery. Some of the married angels, like Uriel and Tash, bring children, and since the three girls that came with them are all over eighteen they look more like their siblings. My natural parents will look young too, I suppose. I really need to get my head around this before I meet them. They decided to wait for me in Avena so our first meeting can be in a more intimate setting, where we can take our time getting to know each other. Shae assures me that I have nothing to be nervous about, and she would know. They’re her parents too. It’s just hard to imagine what meeting them will be like.

  Since returning from Empyrean I’ve been trying to locate my uncle Zavier, who disappeared once Luca banished him from entering Skade with me. Apparently, he turned up at the monastery the day he returned to Earth, pleading to be taken in. To atone for his crimes he asked to serve his life out as a Brother. And since he’s immortal, that will be a long, long time. Even though Zavier was pivotal in my abductions, in the end he did try to save Nathaneal from Luca’s trap. I would like to thank him for that. But everyone is leaving now, and since he hasn’t shown up, he either didn’t accept my invitation or Monsignor Lawrence didn’t allow him to attend.

  I’m standing on the front deck with Nathaneal beside me, keeping me from falling asleep by tickling me under my ribs at regular intervals.

  I might be falling asleep standing up, but I haven’t enjoyed myself so much since … well, I can’t remember. I’m especially enjoying watching my best friends looking chummy and close and adorable.

  ‘What are you smiling about?’ Jordan asks when he catches me staring.

  ‘Oh, nothing.’

  ‘Are you sure about that?’

  I look pointedly at their linked hands. They share a secret smile and Amber’s eyes sparkle brighter than the stars. I can’t remember when either of them looked this happy. Clearly it wasn’t me Jordan needed in his life.

  Nathaneal hurries to open the front door when he sees Amber’s parents coming out, along with Mum and Dad behind them.

  Dad comes straight over with a big hug for me. ‘Promise to visit us before you leave.’

  ‘Absolutely, Dad.’ He’s not asking for much, and this promise is easy to make, saying goodbye is going to be the hard part.

  Reuben gives Amber permission to sleep over so the two of us can catch up, even though this is the first I’m hearing of these arrangements. As soon as our parents have driven off and we come back inside, Jordan and Amber wish us goodnight and head upstairs, their hands still locked together.

  I can’t help but giggle, while Nathaneal smiles and rolls his eyes.

  We walk to my bedroom holding hands. At the door Nathaneal plants butterfly kisses all over my face. ‘Good-night, love,’ he says with a moan of deep longing.

  ‘Do you want to … come in?’

  He snags his bottom lip and tilts his head slightly. ‘You should sleep.’

  ‘I could sleep in your arms?’

  ‘Yeah, but then I wouldn’t sleep.’ With a last lingering kiss, he leaves.

  In my room I change into a singlet top and a pair of pyjama pants, slide under the covers and feel my bones and muscles sigh in relief.

  I drop straight off to sleep, only to wake with a jolt soon after with pain in my side. I hardly ever get sick, so I don’t have much to compare this with, but the pain deepens quickly and before long I’m rolling over and curling my knees up into my chest. Unsure what to do, or how long this pain will last, I sit in my wicker chair for a while and contemplate making a hot chocolate or searching the house for a hot water bottle. But then …

  Arghhh!

  Shooting pain darts up both sides.

  Slipping on my dressing gown, I head downstairs before I wake the others. It’s probably something I ate at the party and will soon pass, or … dare I dream it could be …

  At the back door, I swap my dressing gown for a jacket and beanie hanging on a hook. Instinct and habit has me heading down to the stables to snuggle up with Shadow. I missed him terribly when I was away and I’m dreading the day I will be saying goodbye.

  But midway to the stables the pain hits deeper, shooting under my ribcage, and I drop, gasping, to the ground, which is already moist with early dew. I try to crawl back to the house, but moving is impossible. So I curl up into a ball and do the only thing I can under the circumstances.

  I scream.

  Lights go on instantly on the top floor. A door bangs, and I’m comforted by the knowledge that help is coming.

  Nathaneal arrives first as I expected; he probably leaped off his bedroom balcony. He tucks his wings away, hunkering down beside me. ‘Talk to me, Ebbie.’

  ‘I’m hurting.’

  ‘Where? Here?’ He cradles my head in his lap, carefully pulling off my beanie.

  ‘No,’ I answer. ‘My ribs and … argh!’

  ‘Your back?’

  ‘Uh-huh.’

  ‘OK. OK.’

  ‘Do you know what this is?’

  ‘I think I do.’ A grin begins to form but swiftly disappears when I groan. ‘It’s all right, sweetheart.’ He puts his arms around me. ‘I’ve got you.’

  ‘I heard her scream,’ Amber says after a breathless run across the yard with Jordan close behind her.

  ‘I peeked in her room but her bed was empty,’ says Jordan.

  The pain eases a little, giving me a slight reprieve. But then my skin begins to glow and suddenly I’m lighting up the entire area around me. Amber and Jordan stagger backwards, throwing their arms across their eyes.

  ‘Holy crap!’ Jordan shrieks. ‘What’s happening to her?’

  I’d like to know that too.

  Still holding me, Nathaneal rocks gently. ‘It’s nothing you can’t handle, but we need to get your jacket off.’

  Getting my jacket off becomes a challenge when the pain intensifies and I stiffen all over. It grows hard to breathe, and harder to take. It’s like I have a rocket under my ribs that wants to launch itself through my spine. I try not to scream when he peels the jacket off one arm.

  Amber runs in and helps with the other sleeve. ‘This will pass soon, hon,’ she says. ‘You’ll see.’

  ‘It’s like … bones pushing against my skin. And … ohh! Something is happening. Everyone, you have to move back. Get back.’ I lift up into a squat and notice they’re all still standing around me. Somehow I have to make them understand they’re going to get hurt. ‘Something is building inside me.’

  ‘You’re not going to explode,’ Jordan says, whispering to Nathe with a sideways glance, ‘Is she?’

  They’re still not moving away, and I have no choice but to get up on my feet, shove my hands at them in a get-back motion and scream, ‘Everyone, move! Move! Move!’

  The three of them suddenly fly through the air, coming down hard on the moist grass some ten or so metres away.

  ‘Sorry! So
rry!’ I call out as they scramble back.

  ‘It’s all right,’ Nathaneal says, reaching me first after checking Amber and Jordan are OK. ‘We’re all fine. How long have you been able to do that?’ he asks with pride in his eyes.

  ‘First time, but I’ve … argh … suspected I could for a while.’ The pain changes, shifts down into my hips and my glowing body ignites into a lighthouse multiplied hundreds of times.

  ‘Whoa, what’s happening to her?’ Jordan’s frustrations soar. ‘Are you gonna heal her now, or what? Look at her. Should we call an ambulance? Thane, do something or tell us what to do.’

  ‘You’re not helping by taking your fear out on Nathaneal,’ Amber tells him gently as she plucks some grass bits off her top. He looks at her and she says, ‘I’m scared too.’

  ‘Nathe,’ I ask, ‘is this how it’s supposed to happen?’

  ‘I’m not entirely sure. You are unique, baby. But I can tell it will be over soon.’

  ‘Good.’

  He takes my hand and squeezes it. ‘Remember, you’ve been waiting for this to happen. We all have.’

  ‘What are you two talking about?’ Amber asks.

  I nod at Nathaneal and he tells them, ‘Ebrielle is getting her wings.’

  A ripping sound warns me their arrival is imminent. A sense of my insides stretching past where they should reach throws me off balance. Pinpoint electric shocks run up and down my arms and suddenly I’m jolted backwards and lifted into the air two, three metres. The ripping, jerking and tugging go on and on, lifting me a little higher each time. Finally everything stops – the tugging, the ripping, the pain – and I start to come down, floating at first, but then I drop, hitting the ground on all fours.

  My wings are out. Nathaneal and Amber and Jordan come running to me even though I’m still glowing like a lighthouse. Nathaneal reaches up and touches the wing swaying above my right shoulder. He looks stunned, his eyes filled with awe. But all I can see is something huge and white and sparkling.

  Sparkling?

  ‘They’re so beautiful,’ Amber says.