I wrapped her in a hug. “You have me.”
She was shaking. “Dennis mouthed a word as he left. It looked like rat.” She must have felt me sigh, because she added, “That’s what I think, anyway.”
I wiped away her tears. “We’ll ask him, all right? Later on, when your mother isn’t around.”
She nodded then, and we hugged. And in the silence of the corridor, I realized at last that Ananias was right: There was no need to doubt that everything was real, when the most real thing of all was right in front of me.
CHAPTER 24
I hid out in our room for the rest of the morning. Maybe it was cowardly, but I couldn’t stand the thought of everyone staring at me, knowing what I’d done.
Away from everyone else, I tended to my father. I collected water so that he could wash himself, and helped him pace slowly around the room to get his muscles working again. Someone, Tarn maybe, had left a pile of clean clothes beside his bed. I turned away while he dressed. In a fresh tunic, he looked almost human again.
It must have been around lunchtime when Ananias joined us. He carried a small wooden object in one hand and a bowl of water in the other.
“I’m not thirsty,” I said.
“It’s not to drink.”
He placed the bowl on the floor beside Father’s bunk. Then, with a flick of the wrist, he opened up the wooden object. A razor-sharp blade emerged.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
He studied Father’s face. “Shaving him. At least, I was going to, but it can wait until he’s up again.” He gave the razor to me handle first. “For now, you can shave me.”
The razor felt surprisingly light in my hand. “Whose is it?”
“Kell’s.”
“So why don’t you get him to shave you?”
“Kell?” Ananias raised an eyebrow. “I’m not stupid enough to let him near me with a blade. His idea of fun is shooting birds with a bow and arrow. I’d hate to think what he might do to my neck . . . especially after Dennis’s adventure this morning.”
The blade was so clean and shiny that I caught a little of my reflection in it. It was the first time I’d seen myself in days. My face was bruised, just like Alice’s. I had a thin coating of stubble, just like Ananias. I looked older than before.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “I’ve made things difficult for everyone.”
Ananias nodded. “Well, I’m sorry for what I said to you. I panicked. I was scared about being thrown out of the colony. I was scared for Father. For all of us.”
He pulled a small tub from his pocket and popped the lid off. Once he’d splashed water on his face, he took a glob of the stuff inside and smeared it across his cheeks, chin, and neck. “Kell says this helps.”
“What’s it made of?”
“I don’t know. Don’t want to know, either. Anything that smells this bad can’t be good.”
Usually we’d have smiled at that. Now it just melted the ice a little.
“So start,” said Ananias.
“Start what?”
“Shaving me. And telling me what’s really going on in Sumter.”
He clamped his mouth shut and waited. I didn’t know where to begin. Rose and I had made a mistake and paid for it. Shouldn’t we be looking forward, not back?
“I trust you, Thomas,” murmured Ananias. “You’re the reason I’m still alive, remember? So please, help me understand what’s going on here.”
The words poured out of me then. Over several careful blade strokes, I told him how we’d boarded the ship and found Jerren there. I mentioned Jerren and Kell’s rivalry, and the gunroom.
Ananias didn’t speak at all, or move, or even blink. His breathing was steady. I wanted him to have questions, if only so that I’d know he wasn’t as anxious as me. But even when I’d finished shaving him, his mind seemed to be elsewhere.
I rinsed the razor in the bowl and handed it to him.
“You haven’t got much to shave,” he said.
“No. But something tells me you’ve got something to say as well.”
We were both holding the razor now. Finally, Ananias gave a slow nod.
I washed my face and applied the goo just as he had done. Then I sat perfectly still before him and watched flashes of lamplight reflected in the blade.
He didn’t speak for the first couple sweeps. The blade scraped down my cheek. He rinsed it and started again. “It’s Eleanor,” he said finally.
Another sweep, this time all the way to my chin. He was shaking. I felt it in every tiny vibration. His eyes filled with tears.
My instinct was to say something reassuring, but I couldn’t move with the blade against me. This was the way he wanted it too. Ananias didn’t want any interruptions.
“I don’t know what happened the night she fell,” he continued. “When I climbed the mast, I thought she was still on the ladder. But when I got to the top, she was out of reach, hanging from the rope.”
Another rinse. Slow and methodical. Something to distract him from what he had to say.
“I made a flame. I needed to see her face clearly, and I wanted her to see me too. I thought, even with everything that had happened to us, it would reassure her. But the look in her eyes . . .” He pulled the blade away from my neck and exhaled deeply. “It was like she’d never seen me before. She was frightened of me, I think. Truly frightened.”
Ananias eased my chin up so that he could reach the curve of my neck. I swallowed hard.
“Then Alice joined us. I stopped the flame because I thought I might be able to grab Eleanor, and I needed both hands for that. But when my eyes adjusted to the darkness again . . .” He blinked, sending a stream of tears down his face. “I figured that seeing Alice would calm Eleanor down. But it didn’t. The way she was looking at us . . .” Ananias wasn’t even watching me anymore, but the razor still continued its course. “Eleanor didn’t fall, Thomas. She jumped.”
I flinched. The blade stopped moving, a sudden adjustment that nicked my skin. I felt the coolness of it, then the heat of blood rushing to the surface.
Ananias lifted the razor and held it in front of him. The blade was tinged with red. “I’m sorry,” he mumbled. “I . . . I’m—”
The door creaked opened. I hadn’t heard anyone outside, and the timing of the arrival felt too convenient to be an accident.
It was Rose. She padded over to us and took the blade from Ananias. He didn’t try to stop her. And once he was free of the burden, he seemed to awake from a trance.
He left without a word.
Beside us, my father didn’t stir.
Rose dabbed the sleeve of her tunic in the water and cleaned blood from the cut.
“You were listening, weren’t you?” I asked.
She nodded. Blade ready, she continued what Ananias had started. Her strokes were calm and steady, but I could see in her expression that his news had shaken her up just as much as me.
“Ever since we got to Sumter, Alice has been so quiet,” said Rose. “So lost. We should’ve been there for her, Thomas.” She removed the razor and rinsed it.
“I thought she was grieving.”
“Sure she was. But I don’t think that’s why I’ve been staying away from her.” She ran the blade over my cheek one last time. “I’ve spent so long seeing her as a rival . . . it just never occurred to me that she might need my help. My friendship.”
Rose rubbed the remaining goo off my face with her sleeve. My skin felt even more alive at her touch than it had earlier.
“Do you think Eleanor really jumped?” I asked.
“I don’t know. But Alice clearly thinks so. That’s probably why she was arguing with Tarn last night—she’s looking for answers again. And I don’t think she’s getting them.” She finished cleaning the blade and handed it to me.
“Talking
of answers, have you spoken to Dennis yet?”
“No. He’s closely guarded. It’ll be a while before I can get him alone.” She rolled up the sleeves of her tunic. “Your turn now.”
“To do what?”
“Cut my hair.”
I was about to fold the blade away when she stopped me.
“I’m serious, Thomas. I want it gone.” Her hand rested on mine. My pulse was growing faster, but she refused to let the pain show. The fierceness of her expression reminded me of someone else in our colony.
“Just because Alice has changed, doesn’t mean you need to take her place, Rose.”
“I’ve lost my father. My mother hates me. I betrayed my brother. This isn’t about becoming Alice. It’s about not being me anymore.” She gave a tired sigh. “If this is our new home, then let it feel new to me. Give me the chance to be who I want to be, not who I was.”
She let go of my hand then, but her eyes remained fixed on me. She was imploring me to do this, to be the one person she could still count on.
I liked Rose’s hair. But I loved Rose. So I tugged the blade through the blond locks until the uneven strands fell tight against her neck.
When I was done, she didn’t ask to see her reflection in the blade. She didn’t ask me what I thought, either. She just gazed at me once more. Maybe she was deciphering my feelings from the way I gazed back.
Rose had wanted to change. Well, now she was different. And from the way she was looking at me, it was about much more than her hair.
CHAPTER 25
Alice and Jerren were rigging the catamarans in preparation for our journey to Fort Moultrie. Unlike the day before, they moved slowly, half their attention on the job and half on each other. Alice had taken to wearing a tank top that scooped low at her chest and ended a couple inches above her waist. Her tanned skin glistened with sweat. Sunlight caught the ripple of muscles in her arms and stomach.
Jerren noticed me watching him and turned away. He was embarrassed too—I could see it in the way he fought to make a simple knot—but he shouldn’t have been. Even I found it hard not to peek as Alice paused to lick the sweat off her upper lip.
Now Jerren was watching me, and I was the one turning red.
“Have you seen Griffin?” Alice asked.
Hearing her voice startled me. After what Ananias had told me, it was hard not to look at her differently. “Not since this morning.”
“He wanted to tell you something.”
That was strange. I hadn’t been hard to find. I began to walk back toward the gate when Kell emerged, Nyla beside him.
“Where’s Griffin?” I asked her.
She wouldn’t look at me. “He’s resting. Spent most of the night reading.”
“How would you know?”
She coiled a loop of hair around her ear. “I was with him.”
“What about Ananias? Why isn’t he here either?”
Kell leaned closer. “Turns out, Chief has a new favorite, Thomas. Can’t think what the old one did to offend him. Can you?”
Before I could ask him what they were doing, Rose passed through the main gate and headed toward us, a pack slung across her shoulders.
“Are you coming too?” I asked her.
“Yes. Chief wants me to fill in for Griffin.”
“Why?”
Nyla scraped her foot across the dusty ground. “I told you. He’s resting.”
Everything felt off-kilter. I wanted to see my brother, just to check that everything was all right. But Kell stopped me with an outstretched hand. “Where are you going?”
“To see Griffin.”
Kell spat on the ground. “Tell him, Alice,” he shouted. “No way Thomas will listen to me.”
Alice peered over her shoulder. “Griffin can’t come,” she said. “We’ll be using a series of shouts to let each other know if we see rats. He wouldn’t hear anything.”
“But he can sign,” I said. “Nyla had an idea for how we can work farther apart—”
“No.” Kell brushed by me and headed for the boats. “Nyla’s idea needs all of us to learn the signs. We don’t play with lives on Moultrie. He’ll get plenty of work during gathering trips to other sites, just not this one. But Rose has agreed to take his place.” He raised an eyebrow. “If that’s okay with you?”
As Rose approached her, Alice stopped what she was doing. “Interesting haircut,” she said. “Tell me who did it and I’ll get them for you.”
Rose broke out in a smile. Alice did too.
Nyla began to walk to the boats. “What are you doing?” Kell asked her.
“Going with you,” she replied. “You’re a person short. Can’t make pairs with five people.”
“It’s all right,” Jerren shouted. “She can help me. It’s time she learned the drill. Besides,” he added, fixing Kell with a stare, “something tells me she may be helpful to us.”
Kell didn’t speak for a moment. “Fair enough,” he said with a forced, icy calm. “Come on, Thomas. Time to leave.”
Again, I stared at the main gate. Through the small doorway, I noticed that the grounds were unusually empty. Children peeked above the battlements until their parents dragged them away.
Kell rejoined me. “Don’t mind them,” he said with uncharacteristic softness. “Poor things always know when we’re heading to Moultrie. They tell stories to give each other nightmares: a hundred dead. A thousand. Rat bites, snake bites, ghost bites . . . in their minds the place is a giant graveyard.” He sighed. “Heaven help them when they have to start going over.”
It wasn’t just the children watching us, though. Even the parents cast anxious looks in our direction.
“Jerren’s parents really did die, though,” I reminded him. “It’s not all make-believe.”
He grabbed my arm. “You can keep thoughts like that to yourself. This is Nyla’s first trip to Moultrie. I don’t need her panicking. Understand?”
Kell pulled a map from his pack and spread it out on the jetty. He pointed out the fort itself, and the landmarks inside its walls. He told us about the land that lay between the fort and the water, and the plants we’d find there. Once we had a mental image of the area, he folded it back up and left it in a box. He never mentioned rats, because he didn’t need to.
Jerren untethered the rope that connected us to the jetty and we pushed off. The breeze nudged the sail, but Jerren held the mainsheet fast, at least until we were twenty yards away. Then he loosed the mainsheet and the sail kicked out, driving us across open water.
The wind was stronger than the previous day and we made quick progress. Behind us, the rust-colored walls of Sumter grew smaller. I squinted at the battlements, hoping that I’d catch a glimpse of Griffin and Ananias. Neither of them was there.
Ahead of us, Alice’s boat sliced through the water. I imagined her shouting instructions to Rose and Nyla, anything to ensure that they arrived first. Jerren, on the other hand, seemed content to take things easy.
“So what’s the story with Alice’s father?” he asked me. “She hasn’t mentioned him once, and the man tried to strangle her.”
“Did Chief tell you that?”
“No. But you just did.” Jerren paused. “So who stopped him?”
“Ananias and me.”
“You killed him.”
“No. He fell overboard.”
Kell laughed. “He fell? Kind of clumsy, isn’t it?”
I didn’t know if they were working together, but it was clear they didn’t believe me. “He was surprised.”
“By what?” asked Jerren. “That you wouldn’t let him kill his own daughter? Or that you set fire to him?”
There was no use in pretending he was wrong. The real question was how he knew at all.
“There were burn marks on Alice’s tunic,” Jerren explained. “I asked h
er about them and she wouldn’t tell me anything. This morning, she turned up in new clothes. And I got to thinking, why would Alice and Tarn keep something like that to themselves? And if you’re responsible, why are they standing by you?”
It took all my concentration to stay calm. Jerren and Kell had chosen me for their boat deliberately. They had questions, and didn’t want Alice along to answer for me. I was already trying to second-guess what she might have said.
I expected them to press me for an answer. But neither of them spoke again. It was as if I’d already told them everything they needed to know.
CHAPTER 26
We pulled into a beachy cove, where an outcrop of rocks hid us from Sumter and protected the boats from waves. Jerren and Alice tied the catamarans to buoys instead of beaching them. “Rats’ll climb on any solid surface,” Jerren explained before I could ask. “Trust me, we don’t want them on the boats.”
We stepped into knee-deep water. Instinctively, I scanned the sandy beach, and beyond, to the trees and grass, and the fort itself. But there was nothing out there.
Not yet, anyway.
Kell removed a container from his bag. “Here,” he said, “scoop this into your hand and smear it across every piece of exposed skin.” He looked Alice up and down. “That’ll take longer for some than for others.”
Nyla went first. She used the goo sparingly. It had a pungent odor I couldn’t place.
“What is this?” Rose asked.
“Chief’s concoction. Some vegetables, herbs, fish oil. He says it repels fleas. I think he’s a liar, but I’d rather stink than get the Plague because one of the suckers bit me, you know?”
While I applied the stuff to my hands and lower legs, Kell went over the rules: A single shout at the first sight of rats. Another shout a moment later. Then run straight to the beach and into the water.
“Don’t panic,” he reminded us. “Rats aren’t fast runners. But don’t hesitate, either. The last group that saw rats said they’re more aggressive than they used to be. Their food sources are running out, and the day’ll come when they go straight for us. If today’s that day, get back here. Fast.” He watched us carefully, making sure we were listening. “All right. Jerren and Alice will pair. Thomas, you go with Nyla.”