“Sure, sounds great—better than frozen lasagna.” Ana chuckled, then thought about her mother and sister at the table without her. A pang of guilt stabbed at her heart.
“There are a couple of islands in the middle of the lake. We could eat on one of them.”
“That sounds nice,” Ana said. “It’s so pretty here. I thought it was beautiful in Colorado, but now that I’m here. . .I love it even more.”
Chance answered, “Yeah. There’s a ton of wildlife, and it’s secluded. But I can’t wait to travel and see more, learn more. Though I’m not as excited to leave Clark Bend anymore.”
Their eyes locked in the darkness.
***
Chance stared at Ana’s silhouette as he rowed toward a contour of land that appeared over the dark water. The fuzzy profile grew clear as they approached the island. Evergreens towered into the deep blue sky.
After they arrived ashore, they climbed out in search of a place to picnic. Chance carried a large blanket as he walked up the pebbly beach. In one sweeping motion, he laid it on the ground. Ana set a camping lantern in the middle while he unpacked their meal. Two silver aluminum wrapped burritos emerged along with a couple of drinks and napkins.
He waved her over and when she settled on the blanket, he produced a bunch of bright yellow flowers. The color of the blooms paled in comparison to Ana’s smile and at the sight of it, his palms grew clammy.
Ana breathed in their perfume and whispered, “Heartleaf Arnica. Thank you.”
They ate in solitude and watched the indigo horizon darken as it set the stage for the radiant stars. After the last bite was eaten, they placed the remains of their picnic back into the basket and lay down to gaze at the night sky.
During his time away from Ana, working at Kenny’s auto body shop, doing homework or watching from afar, he spent thinking about her. He wanted to learn everything there was to know about the introspective girl lying beside him. “So, have you ever moved before, or is this your first time?”
Ana tucked her hands behind her head and answered, “This is the first time I’ve moved out of state. We moved a couple of times before, but I’ve never had to change schools.”
“So, did you leave many friends?” Chance asked.
“No, not many close friends. That isn’t the hard part. Fitting in—that’s what’s hard.”
He looked at her thoughtfully. “Yeah, I agree. Fitting in is hard. But, with some people you don’t have to try with,” he said and his hand brushed against her fingers.
Ana’s breath caught and Chance turned to search her eyes. After a moment, she asked softly, “You know the night I came over for dinner? I noticed your grandfather react when he saw my necklace. What was up with that?”
Chance was caught off guard by the question and frowned, not entirely prepared to answer. “Well, my grandfather is very superstitious. The thunderbird is sort of our family totem. He thought it meant something, but I wouldn’t worry about it. It’s nothing.”
Ana frowned and grew quiet. He could tell his answer didn’t satisfy her, but it would have to do for now. Some secrets were best kept. Maybe she’d be more forthcoming about herself. “It’s cool if you don’t want to talk about it, but I was wondering about your father—where’s he at?”
With no trace of any pictures in her house he’d wondered where her father was. He guessed it was a painful subject, but hoped she felt close enough to him to share.
Ana paused then said, “Well, Mom and Dad met when they were really young—just a little older than we are. My mom got pregnant with me and then they got married. They were never madly in love. When things started getting rough, my mom got pregnant with my sister. Dad hung in for a while and when the fighting got too bad, he left. Mom says he was never mature enough to have a wife and kids. Anyway, we haven’t heard from him since. We’re happy together and don’t need him.”
Her face pinched up with anger and pain. Chance grabbed her hand, squeezing gently. Although he was happy she’d shared with him, he regretted his question and the hurt it caused her.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“Yeah.”
Ana held onto his hand like a lifeline and stared at the stars as they flickered in the night sky. Anger swelled in Chance as he thought about her being abandoned by her father. How could he walk away from her? And leave her alone, unprotected? What kind of man was he? He squeezed her hand, maybe a little tighter than he realized.
Ana asked, “What’s wrong?”
“It’s nothing,” he said.
“No, c’mon tell me?”
He grimaced. “I can’t imagine leaving someone I love.”
Ana lay in silence and they listened to the lake lap at the shore. Chance tightened his warm hand around her cold fingers and she sighed. “No, me either.”
He wanted to lighten her mood and started a conversation that would give her peace. “Say—you know any constellations? I can tell you a few Navajo constellations Grandfather taught me.”
Clearly happy to focus on something else, she pointed above their heads and identified a cluster of stars. “That one, of course, is the Big Dipper.”
“To the Navajo, that’s known as the Northern Male. He represents the father and protector of the home.”
“Really? Do you know more about it?” she asked enthusiastically.
Chance shook his head. “No, that’s all Grandfather told me about it.”
“I can tell you about The Big Dipper—if you want—”
“Sure, lay it on me.” Chance stretched back and folded his hands beneath his head.
“So, um, did you know The Big Dipper’s also known as The Great Bear? The Greek myth says that Zeus fell in love with a beautiful maiden, Callisto and had a son with her. She was one of his wife’s virgin hand-maidens, which naturally peeved off Hera. Trying to spare Callisto from Hera’s wrath, Zeus turned her into a bear to hide her. Callisto’s son was turned into a bear as well and is by her side—the Little Dipper.” She pointed up to the constellation. “Protected for all time.” She shook her head and as an afterthought, added, “But that’s really the PG version. It’s funny. Greek myths about the gods always seem to involve them misusing their powers. And with all that power, they were so obsessed with keeping it. There was a prophesy that said Zeus’s dad would lose his power to one of his kids—so he destroyed them. Too afraid of losing his control. But Zeus escaped his father and grew up to save his brothers and sisters and the prophesy came true.” Ana trailed off, appearing self-conscious after she realized how much she’d been talking.
Chance had been totally absorbed with Ana, who glowed with excitement, completely in her element. “Okay, I’m impressed. How’d you know all of that?”
Ana blushed in the darkness. “Well, my interest in constellations led me to Greek mythology. It’s way better than a soap opera.”
“So, what else? Tell me more.”
“Well. . .,” Ana said, embarrassed. “Do you know how to find Polaris?”
“Polaris?”
“Yeah, the North Star. See the Big Dipper? The two outer stars of the spoon guide you.” Ana pointed to the sky and drew her finger along an invisible line. “You can find the North Star just there. The point of the Little Dipper. Polaris is true north. No matter where you are in the world, it always points north.” Ana shrugged. “So, how do you know the Navajo constellations?”
“Oh, my grandfather only showed me a few. I just lucked out—you happened to pick one I know.”
Chance stood up, disquieted. A hunger grew deep within him, and it took everything in him to suppress it. He held his hand out and pulled her upright gingerly. Something about Ana made her seem fragile, breakable. Reluctantly, he let her fingers fall from his grasp.
***
She was light on her feet. Was this what it was like to be normal? On a date and falling in love?
“How about a friendly competition?” Chance asked, “Know how to skip stones? L
et’s say the first person to one hundred wins.”
He reached down, grabbed a round flat stone and handed it to her. It slapped against her skin.
Ana asked laughing, “Oh yeah? Wins what?”
“Hmm, to be determined at a later date.”
Chance leaned over and picked up a handful of smooth stones and dropped them into his pocket. He held his open palm out to the water. “Ladies first.”
Ana arched her eyebrow, then squatted down with her arm held parallel to the water and skimmed her stone across the inky mirrored surface.
“Ten, not bad,” Chance said and followed her lead, sending his stone out across the water.
They continued to skip stones, counting along the way.
“I get the feeling I just got played.”
“I’m what you could say, experienced. I used to take trips down to the lake near my old house and I’d practice. It was something I did when I was angry or frustrated. I’m very good at it,” Ana said with a smirk.
Chance rubbed his jaw and muttered, “Guess so.”
“One hundred to eighty-two. Better luck next time,” Ana said and stepped toward him to shake hands. As she placed her foot down it slipped sideways across the surface of a slick rock. She tipped forward precariously. Chance caught her within his ready arms and lifted her upright. Inches apart, he gazed deeply into her eyes. Ana’s mind went blank, except for one thing.
The scent of fir trees blew past and imprinted the moment in her senses. A breeze moved her hair, but not her focus. It remained on Chance, who held her so close it felt like they were the same living, breathing organism. His hazel eyes held Ana captive and made her heart race. She knew what came next. Chance’s face seemed to reflect her anxiety.
In slow motion, he slid his trembling hands from their resting place at her waist, up her back and to her pale face. Simultaneously they took a deep breath as their faces drew closer, and held each other’s gaze. In a moment of shared surprise, their lips met in a tender dance, each cautious and tentative in unfamiliar territory.
Ana delighted in the moment, but the lack of oxygen made her faint and her legs weakened. Chance dropped his arms to hold her around the waist. A concerned expression crossed his face and Ana groaned.
“Are you okay?” he said, breathless.
Ana whimpered in exasperation. “How embarrassing.”
She almost fainted in front of him. Her fragile hands found a place to rest on his chest and she noticed his rapid heartbeat, which reflected her own. White spots filled her vision and she blinked repeatedly, trying to see clearly. “I forgot to breathe.”
Chance lifted his hand to run his fingers through her hair and shook his head in bewilderment. Then he said in gentle vexation, “Please breathe next time so I don’t have to row you all the way to the hospital.”
His words struck a chord. She buried herself into his shirt and held on tight, for fear this was the last good moment in her life. Chance held her affectionately, unaware of the turmoil that erupted in Ana’s head from his innocent comment.
They moved away from each other. Both seemed surprised and withdrawn after their kiss. Ana hadn’t planned on taking things to this point. Guilt ridden, she felt she’d led him on. In just a week’s time, she’d share her news with him. He’d either be mad at her for not telling him sooner or would leave, like her dad. Having a sick girlfriend isn’t what every guy wishes for. Ana knew this, but she was just so content and felt so normal with him, she couldn’t stop herself.
“Are you ready to head back?” Chance seemed to misinterpret the sad expression on Ana’s face and said, “We can take our time and you can stargaze the whole way. I don’t want your mom worrying about you.”
Chance loaded the basket into the boat, wrapped Ana in the wool blanket and helped her onto her seat. As promised, he took them slowly across the lake toward their launch site. While they glided along the dark glassy surface, she couldn’t shake the foreboding sensation that things would change soon. And not for the better.
Chapter 15
The next morning Ana came downstairs lighthearted and smiling. Melissa walked up to her tired daughter to give her a big hug. Ana leaned back questioningly.
Melissa asked, “What? I can’t hug my daughter?”
“No—sure you can,” Ana said, confused.
The look on her mother’s face worried her. She seemed so melancholy. It forced her to think about her doctor’s appointment. It was only six days away.
Ana sniffed and asked, “Pancakes?”
Eager for a diversion, Ana walked to the dining table where Eva was already perched, glued to her morning cartoons. Eva crammed dripping pieces of pancake into her mouth and looked like a rabid chipmunk gone mad on Bisquick. Eva gave her sister a nod when she joined her at the table.
“So, Chance wants you to come along tomorrow on our walk,” Ana said as she touched her sister’s free hand.
Eva glanced over with a trickle of syrup on her chin. “Weawy?”
Melissa smiled at her girls across the table and tossed a napkin to Eva. “Really Eva, you could at least try to eat like a lady.”
In response, she stuck her tongue out, grabbed the napkin and stuck it to her chin. Ana laughed out loud, which became contagious. Soon all three were laughing themselves into tears.
***
Monday moved too quickly for Ana. She wanted to savor everything, but it seemed like someone had hit the fast forward button. Her days began to move faster than she wanted.
Chance seemed to notice her change in attitude and grew more troubled. He was clearly very observant and she could sense him monitoring her. Far more closely than she would have previously guessed.
When Ana grew faint, he turned to her as though he could hear the blood pounding through her veins, as if he knew something was wrong. She saw him gaze at her purple tinged lips, his brows knitted together, and suspected he wasn’t just thinking about kissing her.
Nostalgic and a little sad, she switched on her computer after school and decided to examine the photographs she’d taken since arriving in Clark Bend. The black screen of her computer flickered to life. She clicked through the slides, taking a moment to appreciate each photograph.
When she got to the series of images taken at the school garden, she stopped. There was Chance with his arms outstretched in movement. She touched the screen, focused on his face and sighed. Ana rubbed at her watery eyes and decided to get a drink downstairs and to check on Eva and her school friend. She could hear snickers coming from the living room.
“Hey D, how you doing?” she asked, leaning over the back of the sofa and into her sister’s surprised face. Eva and her friend were at opposite ends of the couch with crumpled pieces of paper between them.
“Good,” Eva said as her cheeks turned fuchsia. Both girls giggled and slid off the sofa.
“You guys need anything to eat? I’m getting myself a drink.” After a long period of laughing snorts, Ana shrugged her shoulders, retreated to the kitchen, pulled a bottled water from the fridge and headed back upstairs.
She placed a pillow on her desk chair and settled back in front of the computer to continue her slideshow. The next pictures were of the forest behind her house, the twilight she shared with Chance, and the friendly red fox. As she flicked through the series of pictures, something caught her eye. Something shiny.
Ana tapped the zoom button and increased the image size for closer inspection. What she saw only confused her. She immediately flipped back in the series of images, opened the one of Chance in motion, and zoomed in again.
“What the. . .?”
Ana focused on Chance’s necklace. The silver bear heartline hung from a simple, worn leather band. Baffled, she clicked back to the fox and stared at a silver bear hanging on a leather strap around the animal’s neck.
Ana’s mind went blank.
She didn’t know what it meant. Sure, it was weird, but
all it could be was a coincidence. What else could it be? Was she seeing things?
A bird darted through the gloom outside and disappeared in the forest. An odd feeling, like she had swallowed a brick, sank into the pit of her stomach and settled. Nonsensical ideas swirled in her mind, only to confuse her more. Then without further thought, she shut off the internal noise, saved the photographs to her desktop, and decided to review them again after her doctor’s appointment.
If it would even matter after that point.
The rest of the night Ana was quiet. Her mom didn’t seem to notice. While Melissa brushed out Eva’s hair, she brought up that week’s schedule. “So, I double checked with my boss today, and it’s fine if I take Friday off— to take you to Spokane.”
Eva peered over at her taciturn sister, her head jerking around from her mother’s overzealous efforts. “What about me? I wanna to go, too!”
Melissa grimaced. “I know—I know you want to be there. I think it may be best you go to school though. It might be hard for you to focus, but I think it’s the best place for you. I’ve already spoken to Tera and she’s going to pick you up after school.”
Eva’s shoulders slumped and she whined, “But, I want to go with Ana. It’s not fair!”
Silence.
Calmly, their mother whispered. “No, none of it is.”
Eva looked up to her sister with tears in her eyes. “Oh, Ana.”
Chapter 16
Tuesday left Ana topsy-turvy.
Her resolve had been torn apart when her sister cried in her lap the previous night. She was still shaken.
Ana tried to keep her mind off of the image of the fox and Chance’s necklace. Any more absurdity was just too much to process. With her doctor’s appointment, she didn’t need the added weight from worrying about bizarre things she couldn’t understand.
Chance sat close to her through photography and English class while Ana kept an attentive eye on him. She stared at his bear pendant perplexed. How could the fox have the same pendant? And why? Was it a pet? It didn’t make any sense. There was probably a simple explanation—she just didn’t know what it was.
Ana asked, “Chance? Umm, do you have a pet?”
He leaned back, his eyebrows raised. “No. Why?”