It was extraordinary. She turned in his arms to look at his face again. His jawline was so sharp, it could sell perfume. He’d be a model, maybe, when she found him. She had to remember to flip through magazines. Thomas’ cheekbones were the kind a camera would love, playing with the shadows and his scruff to make a spectacular art piece.
His broad shoulders were strong as she ran her hands across them. A flicker of a memory came to her as she enjoyed the sight of him.
“The puppy—the puppy you found… Is it brown?”
He lifted an eyebrow. “Yes, she is. How’d you know?”
But Fallen was at a loss to remember how she knew that fact, and why she’d wanted to ask. She couldn’t find it anywhere in her mind.
“Your profile.” He tilted his head and ran his fingertip from her forehead down the slope of her nose, gently passing over her lips before tapping her chin. “I never do it justice. Lovely. You were meant for silhouettes and cameos.”
She kissed his finger when it passed over her lips again.
“Am I a brute for wanting to skip the talk? For wanting to have you naked so soon into our dream?” His nostrils flared as he seemed to hold himself back.
She shook her head. “You’ve waited long enough.”
Fallen loved that he’d said it was their dream. At least they had that to share.
She pulled her leafy hair off her neck as he unraveled her scarf, sniffing it quickly before tossing it aside. He took to his knee and unzipped her boots. She held herself steady using his shoulders. When he was done, he turned his face and ran his scruff against her wrist.
“You can leave these on.” He ran his hands up her calf until his fingertips danced along the edge of her thigh-high socks. She smiled to herself, happy he was pleased with them.
She held her arms above her head as he grasped the edge of her dress, pulling it off as he stood. He tossed it near her scarf on the ground. Thomas bit his lip when he saw her black satin bra edged in lace.
“So tempting.” He touched the seams, and she arched her back like a cat, desperate for more.
Fallen twirled so he could see her matching black panties.
Then his hands were all over her, as if her skin demanded his. Magnetized, with just a bit of bite to his grip, he let her know he was as near frenzy as she was.
She stopped him by stepping away. “You.” She stepped back to him, to take control. “Now you.”
Undressing Thomas made her heart pound. To see him, just for her, simultaneously vulnerable and strong made wanting him inside her more than sexual. She wanted him inside so she could keep him safe. Keep him real. Keep him near.
Her hands roamed unabashedly. His ass was glorious, and she grabbed it because she could. He pulled her knee up to his hip and pushed himself against the satin there. He leaned down to kiss her and backed her up at the same time, lifting her gently when they got to the side of the bed. She spread her legs and welcomed him between them.
“This.” Thomas paused to search her face. “You make the long days in between worth it.”
And then there was no further discussion. He put his lips on her, and she was far, far, gone in him, lying back so she wouldn’t fall. He slid her panties to the side as one finger joined his mouth in bringing her pleasure.
His other huge hand found her breast and pushed the lace out of the way so he could pinch her nipple.
It took her no time to fall over the edge he’d brought her to. Loud and desperate, she called his name.
Before she could offer any of her own talents, he flipped her over and set her on her knees.
“Okay?” he asked.
“Harder,” she responded before he was even inside of her.
A string of curses spilled from his mouth, and she tossed her hair to urge him on, holding on to the bedspread as he rocked her. She went from bracing herself with her hands to resting on her elbows, changing the tilt of her hips to accept him more deeply.
She felt the delicious pain of heat across her back, which sent her pleasure to another level. She pulled away, spun, and crawled over him. As she licked up his chest, she saw what had caused her pain. The wax from the candles above had dripped onto their skin. She pushed him to lie flat on his back. She mounted him and tilted back as she began to rock, the wax now painting her chest, along with his.
When he came, he tensed and hollered, and she did the same, feeling him pulse inside of her. He raked his fingertips over the drips of now hardening wax and teased yet another wave from her before pulling her up to his chest and rolling over her to protect her from the wax now falling in a steady rhythm. He stood and blew the candles out. Then Thomas slowly peeled the wax from her chest, stopping to run his tongue over her nipples. When she was clean, he lay beside her.
Fallen found her spot, putting her head on his shoulder. They rested in the quiet for a while before she said, “Tell me something about you.”
She carefully peeled the wax from his arm.
He looked down at her. “Let me catch my breath. Tell me about you.”
He played with the edge of her hair, pulling a leaf free.
“There’s not much to say. Keeping things on track takes most of my time. My mom’s not going to change. I don’t think she’ll ever be able to on her own, and I don’t have the resources to help her.”
“But Fenn’s doing great, right?” Thomas rubbed a gentle pattern on her back.
“He is. I just want to be ready for the future. I want to make sure he has a safe place to land, if he ever needs to get back on his feet for any reason. And I’d love to make enough money that I can give Nora support without having her steal from me.”
“I think that’s a great plan.”
“But finding you—that’s what I need right now.” She kissed his chest and wrapped her fingers in his, letting his heart beat against their palms.
“Don’t forget, you want to be a teacher. Make sure that happens.” He gave her a look before releasing her hand and hugging her closer.
They held each other like that for a while, in their roofless church as fall leaves tumbled down on them like blessings.
“Now tell me something. Just anything to think about until next time. Does anything worry you?” Fallen turned on to her stomach.
“Tell you what, before you, I’d stopped worrying. Because I’d stopped caring. I mean, lots of the guys have girls they want to get home to, but I didn’t. Not until you. And now getting to Thursday is all that matters. I made it through all my time on this planet without falling in love. I’ve enjoyed ladies, mind you, but no one has ever caused me to fixate on the curve of her hip for hours in a portrait before—like my life depended on it. You’ve made me grateful for my next breath.”
His devastating blue eyes were soft on her, and his words touched her soul.
“Tell me about something that made you laugh,” she whispered, kissing his bicep.
“Oh, okay. Let me think.” He propped up on his elbow so he could run his hands over her back and bottom. “Um…you’re distracting me.”
“Tell me something good, and I’ll dance naked for you.” She wrinkled her nose.
He bit his lip and rolled his eyes. “How about when me and my meathead brothers decided to make the mountain we live on into a giant sledding path?”
She nodded. “Sounds good.”
“Well, we were in high school, and we’d just had a huge blizzard. Like, almost two feet of snow and giant drifts. So we dragged our sleds and skis to the roof of the house—it’s two stories, mind you—and we patted down a path that went all the way from our roof through all the neighbors’ properties down the mountain, across a road, and over some giant rocks. And then we tromped back up the hill and started wagering who could do it the fastest.
Johnny ran in to some girls and told them to follow, and he had them time us. I had on the skis, and Eddie and Johnny were on the sleds. We took off like a bunch a dummies. And the whole damn time, it was drizzling. But did we pay attention?
No way. There were girls to impress. So we got started and right away, we knew we were in trouble. It was too fast. The whole track was now covered in ice, and we went flying down the mountain.
Johnny just laughed his head off, screaming about kissing our asses goodbye. Eddie started praying out loud, and I was just trying not to run headlong into a tree. But did any of us stop? Hell no. Because we’d rather be dead than lose. Bunch of idiots. So we almost died going across the road—barely missed two cars and a truck that couldn’t stop.” Thomas stopped to laugh out loud.
Fallen took a guess. “Because of the ice?”
“Oh yeah.” He nodded, sitting up. “And then the girls were waiting at the bottom. Their eyes were huge when we came down that mountain faster than three rockets. They were diving for cover, Eddie was still praying, and Johnny laughed so hard he damn near pissed his pants. I was mostly trying to figure out how to stop us, because there was a sheer cliff coming. You see, we hadn’t really put a ton of thought into stopping. Just figured we’d taper off at the end. Instead we picked up speed. So I stopped trying to stop myself and jumped in front of my brother’s sleds. They ran over me—both of them—and we came to a halt inches from certain death.”
Thomas rolled over to show Fallen his scars. “These are from their sled rails.
And then Johnny starts singing a crazy song about how these girls are going to have to tell Ma her three stupid sons have fallen off the mountain. And he has the worst singing voice in the world, but he gets all of us laughing so damn hard—the girls included. What a day.”
Fallen wiped tears from her eyes while she laughed. The story itself was hilarious, but the delivery was everything. He radiated pure joy.
“That’s incredible,” she said. “You saved them!”
“Not to hear them tell it. Both of them always say they were about to do some real incredible daredevil stuff in mid-air if I had let them go off of the cliff.”
“Your brothers and cliffs.” Fallen thought of the cliff-diving demonstration he’d given her on their second date.
“They’re trying to get me killed, the two of them.” Thomas eyed her chest. “Tit for tat?”
Fallen wiggled her shoulders to make her breasts sway. She scurried off the bed before he could grab her, but soon he had her around her waist. They went from playful to heated together as he brought her back to him. As she locked her fingers behind his neck, feeling his readiness for her against her back, her lids started to feel heavy.
No. No.
His hands cupped her breasts, promising more pleasure.
They could still be skin to skin while she had time left, so she spun in his arms. They could still be mouth to mouth. She crashed into him, climbing him as he settled himself into her, desperate. It couldn’t be over yet. Not yet. He filled her as he rested her against the empty window frame, hands everywhere as they tried to hold on to each other. The sheers whipped around them. They were a tempest for each other.
“Stay with me.” She could hardly talk as her lids began to weigh on her, prevent her from watching him.
“Dream girl, make it until next Thursday. Please.”
She felt his fingers dig into her hip as he teased one last orgasm out of her. She got one more glance, just a snapshot of Thomas, his muscled chest working for her, the look of love so etched on his face that it changed who he was.
And then there was blackness.
Fallen woke as the orgasm shuddered through her. Alone in room 514.
Chapter 17
Safe
Fallen stayed on the bed in 514 until the last of the warmth from his fingers bled from her skin. Then she dragged herself upright and neatened the comforter behind her. Her feet felt like cinderblocks. Next Thursday seemed even further away than last time.
She looked at the mirror, and a light flashed. Fallen rushed to it when her dusty mind remembered she’d gotten a peek at Thomas through there.
Sure enough, she watched as his eyes opened with a start. The little brown puppy sat at his feet. As he started to fade, his face crumpled into a sob, and his hands, which had just been touching her, curled into fists. But in the next moment, his heart-wrenching sadness became an expressionless mask. He moved quickly as the puppy flinched. Was it a gunshot? A bomb?
She couldn’t know because the mirror went back to reflecting only her face—nothing of his.
Fallen sat on the floor hugging the mirror for long enough that her legs went numb, and she had to get up slowly, letting the blood rush back into them before they supported her. She set the mirror back where it belonged with a heavy hand.
She used her flashlight to remove the hooks and the picture from the corner—banking on Mr. Orbit’s inattention at that very second to make her escape. It was a ridiculous risk, but what choice did she have. Plus, he’d been there in the dream—with a photograph he’d taken of her—so any doubts about whether the two worlds intersected for him had been put to rest. He had to know what she was up to on Thursdays. But he was a master of the mind game. He gave away nothing.
Fallen sighed. Racing her mind around in circles did nothing for her. She needed to get home. She’d left her cart in the supply closet this time, so all she had to do was sneak out with the picture under her coat.
Outside the hotel, the biting wind stiffened her resolve. She would find Thomas. They were meant to be together. Just to sit next to him and hold his hand would be worth it, to see his sparkling blue eyes and not have to leave. She turned this over and over in her mind, and it burned in her like fuel, keeping her warm as she walked.
Finally she stumbled into her house, closing the door behind her and locking it after her long walk. Then the light in the living room came on, and she looked into the worried face of her brother.
“Fenn, why are you up? You know I’m late on Thursdays.” She hung her keys on the hook by the door and shuffled her coat and the picture into the coat closet under his scrutiny.
“Are you drinking?” Fenn looked older than his nearly 17 years when she turned toward him, startled by the question.
“No. No! Why would you ask that?” Fallen smoothed her uniform skirt.
“Because you’re acting like an addict. You’re distant. You come home at odd hours.” He folded his arms over his chest. “What’s in the closet? Liquor?”
“It’s nothing. Nothing to worry about. It’s…” She stepped aside instead of fighting him when he came forward and took out her coat and the contraption Desta had made.
He was clearly confused. “What are you into?”
She took the poster board and battery pack out of his hands and hugged it. “It’s just something from the hotel. Something I need. I’m not drinking. I’m not like Nora.”
He looked from her face to her arms cradling the photo. “If you say so.” He turned, crossed the living room, and started up the stairs. “I just hope you’re safe.”
Fallen looked at her white-knuckle grip. He didn’t understand. She hadn’t explained. But Fenn was just a kid. He couldn’t understand how important getting to see Thomas was to her.
She wasn’t addicted to room 514. She was in a fight between time and the past and her boss…
She sighed as she decided to take the photo with her to her room to hide it where she kept Fenn’s watch.
Addiction was her mother’s problem, not hers, she assured someone—possibly herself.
···
Friday was a lonely day, and Desta was missing again. 8 and 9 exchanged disappointed looks with Fallen after the morning meeting as they trudged up to take care of Desta’s floor. After a quick parley in the birdcage, they determined no one had spoken to Desta, so they would call after work. Fallen wanted to tell her about Burt. After the lunch break, 8 told Fallen she’d left a message on Desta’s phone but still hadn’t talked to her directly.
At the end of the day, Fallen was exhausted, but she ran through her last two rooms to get to the library before it closed. She had just a few minutes there before she was
going to be asked to leave.
She put her time into researching when the United States had implemented the draft. The brothers had enlisted, but they’d seemed to know war was coming. However, the draft had been policy for decades—nothing specific enough to be of much help. She also quickly checked her email, but had nothing from Marquette or Ellen.
As the librarian showed her the door, Fallen decided to track down Ellen for a personal visit on her next day off, as email wasn’t a great way for them to communicate. Not that their time talking in person had gone that well either... Still, this gave her something to focus her energy on, which helped. Thursday was so very far away, with days and days where things could go wrong in between.
···
Fenn had been out with Jessica on Friday evening, but he was up early to see Fallen before she left for work. He seemed subdued as she made him scrambled eggs for breakfast, and he refused to take the bait when she teased him about promoting his study partner to girlfriend status.
“I like her, but…I don’t know. I don’t know what you want me to say.”
He seemed frustrated, so Fallen backed off, assuring him she knew matters of the heart were complicated.
“So, if you had anything you needed to tell me, you would, right?” Fenn asked as he downed his orange juice.
“Yeah, if I did. Which I don’t.” Fallen put her lunch together as her brother picked up his dishes and put them in the sink.
“You’re sure about that?” He gave her a look that haunted her. It reminded her of how she’d felt every time she found alcohol hidden in the house when they were younger.
“Fenn, I’m here. I’m making things work. If I have to come home a little late once in a while—I’m sorry. But it’s not like you can’t stay alone.”
“Listen, I know you see me as a kid, and that’s fine. But I grew up in this house, too. I know stuff. And I know that you either have a new boyfriend or you’re getting into something like what Mom’s into. And if that’s not true, please correct me. You’ve been here for me, and I’m going to be here for you. It’s not a one-way street.”