Chapter 19
Tallia sighed her relief now that she and Costa were finally alone. She smiled up at him as he took both her hands in his and drew her into a sheltered corner of the terrace where no one could see them. She noticed his fingers toying with the ring she had not removed. He looked down at it with pride and lifted her hand to kiss the ring and then her palm.
"I missed you," he whispered.
Knowing they were behaving foolishly since they had been together only hours ago, Tallia bit her lip and nodded. "I missed you too," she admitted softly.
Costa groaned as he bent to kiss her, his mouth gentle, worshipful, as it moved over hers. "I want you to stay, Agapate," he said against her lips.
"Emmy needs me, Costa," Tallia told him with grave reluctance. Her heart twisted in her breast as she was forced to speak the words she dreaded. "I have to go with her to make sure she's okay. She's upset, Costa, I can't leave her alone. She might do something stupid and backslide. Please understand."
"I understand that you are too kind. Haven't you already done enough for her, Tallia? At some point she has to learn to manage on her own. You will be my wife soon, and Emily will have to be responsible for herself. You agreed to live here with me, in Greece. It is what you said you want for our future, I know you did not lie," he retorted urgently.
"Yes, I know what I said and I meant it Costa, but she is my sister and she needs me."
"Well, I need you Agapate," he pressed, sounding angry and put out.
"Costa-"
"Do you want to marry me or not?" he growled.
"I won't chose between you," Tallia told him firmly, refusing to let him draw her into an ultimatum. She could tell Costa was a hard negotiator, but this was not one of his business deals. And she would not be bullied. His eyes narrowed and glittered, sending shivers of apprehension through her body as she wondered if he was about to tell her it was over.
"You may have to," he gritted out tightly.
Tallia took his left hand and brought it to her lips, kissing his bare ring finger. "I would chose you Costa, you must know that, but it would tear me apart if something happened to Emmy."
"Agapate," he groaned. He sounded like a man in pain as his prideful mask slipped, and he pulled her close against his chest. "I am a selfish bastard, forgive me. I know you must be with your sister, but I can not bare to see you leave, not even for a day."
"Costa, I love you," Tallia told him plainly." I made a promise to marry you, and you are what I want, more than anything. I will come back. Trust me."
"For how long?" he pressed, his thick black brows lowering in a clear sign of irritation. He was not getting his way and was having to accept it. "How long before you come home?"
"I… I don't know, a few weeks," she told him, every part of her being rebelled at the notion of being separated from him for such a long time.
"A week," he pronounced firmly. "Seven days, no more and no less, and then I come for you," he said in what sounded like a warning.
Tallia grinned, delighted by his macho posturing since it revealed his very real need for her. "I hope so, though I expect you to show me a little more respect than you did this morning," she teased.
Costa blushed adorably in remembered chagrin. "Well, then you had best be ready and not provoke me," he grumbled darkly, scowling to hide his embarrassment.
"I wouldn't dare keep you waiting, Coco," Tallia reassured him with feigned meekness, going up on her toes to kiss his hard mouth until it yielded and he kissed her back.
"Must your sister stay in your room tonight?" he asked when she pulled away, his hands griping her firmly around the waist to keep her from leaving.
"Yes, the other guest room is next to Fidelio's," Tallia reminded him, feeling just as wretched as Costa looked as he swore softly under his breath.
"I need you in my bed tonight Agapate, if we are to be parted for an entire week."
Tallia almost laughed at the way he said 'entire week', as if it were an eternity. "Costa, now is not the time to tell Emmy about us."
"Agreed, but you owe me a proper goodbye," he husked; pulling her up against him so she could feel his obvious arousal.
Costa almost cursed with irritation when Ari came out onto the terrace to clear the table. The poor man looked aghast when he noticed them in the darkened corner, and scuttled away like a frightened animal. Tallia took the opportunity to step away from Costa. She had to go upstairs or Emmy was going to come back down looking for her, and sensed she had to do it quickly before Costa made things more impossible or simply dragged her off somewhere to ravish her.
When he reached for her, she batted his hands away and shook her head gently but firmly. Costa's face darkened ominously, as he did not take well to being thwarted or rejected. "I have to go," Tallia sighed, wishing he would not make this so difficult. She was already miserable at the prospect of leaving.
"You will come to my room tonight," he stated coldly, his eyes dark and grim.
"Costa-"
"Tallia, I'm not asking," he bit out harshly.
"Good night," Tallia snapped, all her sympathy soured by his highhandedness.
As she rushed up to her room, she shook her head furiously. She knew Costa was an autocrat, but she resented being dictated to as if she were one of his employees. The more she thought about it, the more annoyed she became. He didn't even treat his employees the way he just treated her. He was unfailingly kind and polite to the people who worked for him. For God sake, he was still squirming with shame because he had offended Gustav's sense of propriety this morning!
When he treated her like he just had, Tallia felt as if she didn't know him at all. Worse, she had the uncomfortable sensation that she was seeing a side of him she would not like if she were ever exposed to it. She knew Costa could be a bastard, but sometimes she had a feeling he was a bit of a misogynist with a very low opinion of her sex.
She couldn't forget his remarks about coming to an agreement between them on the day he scared her half to death during the car-ride from hell. She could only imagine what distasteful agreement he had had in mind. It probably involved a bank draft, she thought with a shudder.
Fidelio had mentioned that Costa bribed one of his girlfriends to dump him when Fidelio suggested he wanted to marry the girl. That was the reason Fidelio insisted he could not tell his brother about his intentions towards Emmy. Shrugging off the strange thought, Tallia tried not to fret over how short a time she had known Costa. Listening to Emmy ranting about her shortsightedness with Fidelio, however, made her uncomfortably aware that while her sister had known Fidelio for about a year and their relationship had crashed and burned spectacularly, she had only known Costa for two weeks.
She wasn't a narcissistic, deluded idiot. She knew she was rushing headlong into marriage with a man who was essentially a stranger to her, but she loved Costa. She had never dreamed she could love anyone the way she loved Costa. Even if he didn't share the feeling, she wanted him so badly she thought the risk was worth any pain that might come later.
After only two weeks together, she couldn't imagine living without Costa. She didn't want to live without him. He was the most exciting man she had ever met. Every time she saw him her heart just went crazy, racing and fluttering. What she felt was more than just physical. They could talk and laugh and had the same desires for the future. She wanted to see him everyday and be a part of his life. She ached to have his children, and knew she would be devastated if he broke things off and didn't want to be with her.
Tallia stopped outside her bedroom door to take a deep, calming breath. She told herself she was being silly, and everything was fine. She just had to trust her instincts about Costa and have a little faith. Summoning a serene look, she stepped into the room and gave Emmy a reassuring smile.
“What was that all about?" Emmy wasted no time demanding.
"Oh, nothing, Costa just wanted to tell me he enjoyed meeting me, that sort of thing. He's very formal," she said dismissi
vely.
Emmy grunted, clearly uninterested, and started talking about her plans for home. She was excited for Tallia to see her new apartment. She said it was much nicer than the flashy penthouse she lived in two years ago and insisted it would be so much fun to live together.
Tallia listened with a guilty conscience, wishing Emmy did not sound quite so thrilled at the prospect of them being roommates. Her own apartment was long gone, rented off to strangers while she was in a coma with no expectation of ever regaining consciousness. All of her belongings had been sold off or packed up by Emmy and put in storage while she was ill.
Suddenly she was actively dreading returning to London, as if it spelled the end of a beautiful dream and a return to grim reality. She felt like Cinderella after the ball. Soon she would be back in cold, rainy England, surrounded by the faded echoes of her old, uneventful, lonely life, far from the warmth of Costa and the promise of a new life with him on Seleni.
Costa cursed himself for being a fool as he watched Tallia run into the house, her long hair swinging in a heavy, silken curtain around her shoulders, her slim legs flashing beneath the thin skirt she wore to dinner. He had behaved like an ogre and a spoiled brat, browbeating her to stay, as if he couldn't go a day without her, so naturally she had fled, disgusted with him.
It did nothing to improve his mood that he genuinely felt as if he could not go a day without her. In a very short amount of time he had become far too used to having her around, to spending every moment with her, and to having her all to himself. He was actually bereft, as if he was at loose ends and didn’t know what to do with himself. He didn't like the feeling at all. He hated the desperation that clawed at his insides, the vile sense of having no control over this situation and no control over himself.
In the past, he never gave a damn about any of the women in his life. He certainly never spent much time with them. Only the bare minimum was required to get them into bed, and after that was accomplished he usually never wanted to see them again. To his way of looking at things, women were interchangeable. It only mattered whether he was in the mood for a blond, a brunette, one with big boobs, or a nice ass.
He was a pig. His friends told him as much on a regular basis. Costa never cared what other people thought, since he got what he wanted out of the parade of lovely ladies who came his way. He had loads of sex with no strings attached.
Tallia, however, had ruined him. She smashed his callous worldview to pieces and did it so subtly he never even realized it was happening. She slipped under his defenses from the moment she arrived on Seleni, blinding him with her beauty and then stripping him down to naked emotion with her sweetness.
It was Tallia, so innocent and eager, who forced him to dig deep and find the gentle lover buried somewhere under his jaded playboy routine. Faced with a woman so pure and good, he had been forced to either walk away or drop his façade, becoming a man worthy of her affections.
When she told him she loved him tonight, those three little words had disarmed him completely. He never thought he would want to hear a woman say that to him. Before Tallia, he had run at the first hint of those words. In the circles he played in, confessions of love were anathema, a joke, a sad faux pas, and the ultimate turn off. Yet when Tallia said it, he melted. Everything inside him went haywire, and he wanted to tell her he felt the same way, throw himself at her feet, swear he would treat her like a queen, be faithful, and do whatever it took so she never left him.
Realizing just how vulnerable she made him feel had brought out a dragon in him, a familiar fire-breathing beast, and he had tried to control to her. Unfortunately, Tallia wasn’t so easily cowed and didn’t respond well to being ordered around, which was why he was all alone at that moment. She had slain the beast. Now he was defenseless against her.
He was scared. Costa realized he was terrified of the way he felt and what would happen if she changed her mind. He'd had her all to himself for the past two weeks, tucked away in their private love nest. Tallia was an innocent. She'd been in a coma for part of the last two years. She didn't know anything about him and didn't know the truth. He knew that wouldn't last. One look into Emily Maitland's spiteful blue eyes, and he knew his days were numbered. Once Tallia told Emily about their relationship, Emily would waste no time revealing every sordid detail of his past to her sister.
Costa wiped a hand that shook over his face, as he tried to imagine how Tallia would react. He was no saint. He might not be as shallow as his brother, but he had a sex-drive that would probably put Fidelio to shame and a phone book worth of women who could testify to his utter lack of morals or tact. Costa was well aware he treated women like crap, and for the first time in his life he actually regretted it.
Tallia, he knew, would be hurt. She might be mad at him now, and rightfully so for commanding her to come to his bed as if she were his property, but in a day or two, she was going to despise him. He would not even be there to explain himself, if there were a way to explain such a thing. If he were a stronger, better man, he would go and confess everything to her right now. But he just couldn’t bring himself to do it.
How exactly, he asked himself with burning self loathing, did one go about excusing years of using women for base sexual gratification and then discarding them with the same ease with which one flushed a used prophylactic down the toilet once he got what he wanted?
About the only thing Costa could be proud of, was that until Tallia he always practiced safe sex. When a man slept around as much as he did, it was imperative to be careful if he planned to live very long. He could almost hear the devil laughing as Hell opened up to swallow him. He was doomed, irredeemably doomed.