“I have an admission.”
“Tell me,” he growled out, turning in her arms and running his fingers through her hair as she looked up at him.
“You told me the things about my body you find beautiful.”
He nodded once, frowning slightly.
“Do you want to know what I think is the most beautiful part of you?”
“Yes,” he whispered, his eyes so gold they were almost yellow.
Karis ran her fingertips down the side of his face, tracing his scars. “These are the marks of a survivor. Of a strong man who lived through something weaker men wouldn’t. These marks gave me you.”
Colt licked his lips and asked, “What do you mean?”
“If you didn’t have these, you wouldn’t have the bear. And someday, when you meet my animal, you will understand. I can’t be with a lesser man. He wouldn’t survive me. If you didn’t have these, it would mean you wouldn’t have the bear, and you would’ve paired up a long time ago with some normal human woman. But because you needed time to fight the life that had been given to you, you didn’t know it, but you waited for me to find you. If you didn’t have these?” She cupped his cheek as he leaned into her touch, and then she lowered her voice. “You wouldn’t have me. Your damage is beautiful.”
He searched her eyes. He then drew her palm to his lips and let his kiss linger there. “Soul fixer,” he whispered. He leaned down and sipped at her lips like she was to be coveted. Like she was a treasure to be handled gently.
He ended the kiss with a soft smack of his lips and rested his forehead against hers, eyes closed. “I have to go.”
“Go where?”
“More fixing. Trigger’s waiting outside for me.”
“You’re going after Amos,” she whispered. It wasn’t a question.
“I love you,” he murmured. “You deserve a man who will defend you. Know this, woman,” he murmured, his voice lowering and going gritty. He opened his bright eyes and said, “The devil inside of me will always protect you and the family we build.” He kissed her on the temple and made his way into the living room. He dressed quickly, face somber and focused, smelling more and more of fury.
Amos would bleed tonight, and this was the part where Karis had to stand back and let Colt do what he had to do. He and Trigger were built different. They didn’t have it in them to back down. A man had touched something that Colt loved, and he couldn’t let that go unpunished.
Outlaw. Her outlaw.
He turned at the door, right before he left, and trapped her in his gaze. “I need to hear you say it.”
Oh, she knew what he needed. She was his ride-or-die now, and he could have any piece of her soul he needed to get him through bloody nights. “I love you, too.”
He let off a quick sigh as if he’d been holding his breath. “Keep your phone on you. I’ll be back when I can.”
The click of the door closing was a lonely sound. She hadn’t missed what he really said. It wasn’t “I’ll be back soon.” He knew he might be dealing with big trouble tonight, the kind that put him in a cage. And for her, to avenge the bruises on her throat, he was going to do it anyway.
Beautiful damage.
Chapter Fourteen
“Do you want to talk about it?” Trigger asked.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, Trig. Just because we had our wuss moment earlier don’t mean we need to do therapy hour every time an issue comes up. I’m fine. Or I will be once I beat the ever-lovin’ shit out of Amos.”
Trig turned his truck onto the road toward Darby. “So that’s a no on therapy hour?”
“No!” Colt glared out the window and clenched his fists on his thighs. His knuckles already tingled as if they knew what kind of battering was coming. That’s why Trig was driving. Both Colt’s hands would be broken after he was done with Amos. “Did you see her neck?”
“I saw it. He must’ve put one hell of a squeeze on her.”
Colt chewed on his thumbnail for a minute before he said, “And furthermore, this is a test…right? They’ve never won. Think about it. The Darby Clan has never won a fight with us. He’s an untested Alpha, pretty new to the Clan, and he fucks with Karis? He’s flexing his muscles…right?”
“Man, I don’t know him well enough to call what he’s thinking. If it was Chase pulling this? I could guess, but Amos has been with the Clan, what? A year? And he’s been a quiet member. He was there that night the Clan attacked us. I remember because he was the first to run when you killed their War-Bear. He was scared, so this move doesn’t make sense. Why would he mess with Karis? He has to know she’s yours. I went to find Kurt to ask him about the new Alpha, but he ain’t home.”
“What? Where is he?”
Trig sighed and looked troubled as hell. “All his shit was packed up. I think he’s on his way out if he and Gunner haven’t already disappeared. Also, good on Karis and Ava for getting out of that situation. It could’ve gone way worse for them.”
“Good on them? The girls were going to hide it from us.”
“And now ask yourself why.”
“I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because I’m pissed and can’t think straight.”
“Your mate is trying to keep you out of jail.”
Colt snorted. “Well, I wish her luck with that. I’m pretty used to the food at the Darby Precinct.”
Trigger chuckled. And then Colt chuckled. This should not be funny. They shouldn’t laugh at what delinquents they were, but Trig chuckled a little louder and that made Colt laugh louder than him until he slashed his hand through the air and said, “Stop it, Trig. This ain’t funny. I have to keep my head. I have some mountain lion ass to whoop.”
“Hey, remember that one time I asked you if that was a ‘no’ for therapy hour and you went to bitchin’ about your problems for fifteen minutes?”
“Fuck you.”
“No thanks, your sister takes care of that.”
Colt’s gag was instant. “Trigger! You’re a grade-A asshole.”
His Alpha was laughing in earnest now, and Colt was pretty sure he actually hated his friend again.
But when they pulled onto Main Street and Colt saw the sign for the GutShot, readiness overtook any humor he felt.
It didn’t matter how much Trig distracted him from what he had to do, the cold hard truth was that he was going to have to bleed Amos for making those marks on his mate’s neck. He could only imagine Karis’s thoughts with that bastard’s hand around her throat. Tough girl, but she wasn’t alone anymore. She’d said once that she needed a mate who had her back. That would never be a problem for him.
The GutShot was the Clan hangout, so without any discussion, Trig had come here and pulled right up front. He parked on the street and cut the engine.
“You know Colt…I’ll always have your back.”
It meant the world to him. “I know.”
“Come on,” Trigger rumbled. “Let’s get this done.”
“Yep,” Colt agreed, shoving his door open.
Colton didn’t even tote his dad’s old Colt Single Action Army, the pistol he’d been named for. All he needed were fists and Amos’s stupid laughing face to egg him on.
Colt lead Trig into the GutShot and froze the second he opened the door. The bar was empty other than Cooper and that female cougar shifter, Trina. They turned when he and Trig walked in, and their eyes held phantoms.
“Warmaker,” Cooper greeted him formally. The old man’s bushy gray eyebrows lowered as he said, “Amos is a different kind of hunter than Chase was.”
“What does that mean?” Trig asked.
“He likes to divide and conquer,” Trina answered for him. Was she crying?
Alarm bells were clanging in Colt’s mind, spurring his bear to panic. “Divide and conquer,” he repeated, shaking his head. “I don’t understand.”
Trina took a shot of what looked like tequila. Pulling a face at the burn of the liquor, she gulped and explained, “Amos has
the Clan at Two Claws. He knew you would come here to fight him and leave your ranch exposed. Hairpin Trigger, your old lady won’t be human after tonight. She’ll belong to the Clan. And Warmaker…” A tear slid down her cheek. “Your mate will be dead.”
Chapter Fifteen
“Okay, Genie the Meanie, I’m not above bribing you, as is evident by my heaping fruit, nut, and veggie bowl,” Karis muttered, putting the finishing touches on the squirrel snacks she’d bought at the store.
The squirrel glared at her suspiciously from her place on the window sill across the cabin. A Karis fan, she still was not.
“Look, we both have a lot in common,” Karis said, making her way carefully toward the window. “I like nuts…you like nuts. I don’t let people push me around, and you definitely don’t do that either. Respect. So, I think we should come to a truce for the good of the man we both love.” Three more steps toward Genie, and the critter looked ready to run. “I’m not even mad that you crap on my pillow, or there is fur in my toothbrush. And I’m totally fine with you making my favorite scarf into nesting material. But you and I both have to live here, and also, I need to make a wish on you, so if you could let me pet you, that would be great.”
She held out the bowl that was overflowing with squirrelly goodness. “Lookey look look, Genie. It has peas. I searched on the internet for stuff you would like.”
Genie backed to the farthest corner of the window as Karis set the bowl of snacks down on the ledge. Well…okay. She rested her hands on her waist and looked around, nodding. At least Genie let her get this close, so maybe she could still make a wish. Any closer and she would definitely bleed. She looked extra rabid right now.
Karis touched the window sill, which was as close as she was getting to Bitey McBiterson, closed her eyes, and wished on a squirrel. “I wish Colt and Trig will come home soon. And not be hurt. And also bring lime sherbet with them. That is all.”
When she opened her eyes, Genie was sitting right by her hand, munching on a green grape. She shouldn’t be this excited about the acceptance of a woodland creature, but in her head, Karis was already planning a family portrait with her, Colt, and Genie for next Christmas.
“Gah, I’m nervous,” she murmured.
Genie stared at her with big brown eyes and continued chewing.
“I know Colt is tough and has been in a billion fights, but it’s still scary watching him walk away while I just sit here waiting on him to return. What if he gets hurt?”
Genie blinked.
“Right. You are a squirrel, and you can’t talk back. I’m gonna go see Ava. You just stay here and stay warm,” she said, wrapping her favorite, squirrel-shredded blue scarf around her neck.
In true Genie fashion, she ignored Karis’s advice and ran out the door as soon as she opened it. Okie dokie then, maybe they were second best friends now. But when Karis looked back behind her to see if Genie was following, she was shimmying up a tree instead with an apple slice from the snack bowl hanging out of her mouth.
She was going to make a little squirrel door for her to get in and out of the house, and maybe she would rig up some tubes along the top of the cabin too, so she could climb for fun in there. And someday she was going to be snuggled up on the couch with Genie and Colt, and they would be one big, happy family. It might take a while but, by golly, she was going to be a patient hunter until she got them there. Genie couldn’t run from her love forever. Colt deserved for there not to be tension between his girls.
Please let Colt be okay. It had only been half an hour since they’d left in Trigger’s truck, but it felt like days. Each minute was dragging by like an hour, but Ava would make time pass quicker. They could wait together for the boys to return from their dark deeds.
The hairs rose on the back of her neck, and she turned fast to make sure Genie wasn’t attacking her. But the squirrel was still in the branches, eyes on the woods, gnawed-up apple slice in her little hands.
Huh. With a frown, Karis rubbed the back of her neck and scanned the woods, but there was nothing there, and the polar bear in her remained silent. She made her way onto the trail through the snow that she and Colt had made from their trips to the big cabin. Eyes on Colt’s boot prints, she froze when she saw an animal print just to the right of the trail.
Now, if it was a bear print, she wouldn’t have given it another thought. Trig and Colt liked to shred the outside of the cabins sometimes when they were feeling like monsters. But this was a smaller print, and of the feline variety.
The blood drained from her face, and she yanked her attention to the big cabin, just thirty yards off. The lights were on, and it looked calm enough, but on closer inspection, the front door was open just a crack.
Shit.
Now the bear was awake. Karis took off at a dead sprint for the house. Ava, Ava, Ava!
There were eyes in the woods now. So many, and the closer she got to the cabin, the more it stank of cougar fur. Fuckin’ cats.
Her legs burned from pushing them step after step, and as she reached the porch, she skidded past the stairs, turned and gripped the ground, raking her nails through the snow to the earth beneath to slow her momentum. Stairs, stairs, stairs, and then she threw open the door.
Blood. She smelled blood. Ava and cougar and blood, and against the wall was a dead cat with its neck slit. Good girl.
“Ava!” she called, panicked as she searched the living room and the bedroom. Drops of red led to the back door that was open. The window panes on the door were cracked like there had been a struggle.
Why would you take such a risk for me?
Because that’s what Clan does. They have each other’s back. No matter what.
That moment between her and Ava played so vividly in her head as she ran out the back.
“Karis!” Ava’s scream echoed from the barn. For the rest of her days, Karis would never forget the sound of pure terror in her voice.
Chest heaving, breath chugging in front of her, she bolted for the barn. Cats in the woods, cats in the woods. They were huge. She’d never seen a mountain lion shifter Changed before. They were bigger than wild lions. Two were on their bellies, stalking toward her. As she passed, they charged. She could feel them behind her, but she didn’t have time to turn around.
If they reached her, she would let the bear out.
Pain infused Ava’s next scream, and Karis used the fury it caused to push herself faster.
The horses were running circles around the corral in front of the barn, their eyes rolling in fear. A horse screamed inside. Boom! Boom! Harley was pissed or scared, she couldn’t tell which yet.
The sliding door to the barn was open, and when she ran through, someone grabbed her from behind. Her reaction was instant. She pulled him over her shoulder like her brothers had taught her to do. She threw him as hard as she could, flexing her shifter power. Amos slammed into the ground on the other side of the barn on hands and feet, digging into the dirt floor to stop himself from hitting the wall.
He wore the devil’s smile. “You’re too late, Breeder.”
Fingers clawed, chest heaving, Karis lifted her gaze to the mountain lions that watched from the loft, poised, and ready to drop down on her. She fucking dared them. Steeling herself, she lowered her gaze to the body in the middle of the barn floor. Ava was staring back at her, panting for breath, tears streaming from the corners of her eyes. “Karis, Karis, Karis,” she gasped out.
She didn’t have a jacket on, and the sleeve of her gray thermal sweater was wet with burgundy.
“She’s Clan now,” Amos said.
Shit! They’d bit her. Karis ran to her. She didn’t give a single fuck if the lions above her attacked. All she needed was an excuse to let the bear have them. She skidded on her knees and cradled Ava to her chest.
She was crying. “It hurts. Kill me. Please.” Ava’s face crumpled as she repeated, “Please.” Her back bowed, and she gritted her teeth against the pain.
“You’re gonna be fine.”<
br />
Amos came too close.
“Get back!” she roared. “Ava, Ava, listen to me. Everything’s gonna be fine. I can fix this. Do you want—”
A mountain lion slammed into her with the force of a hurricane, and she hit the side of a stall. There were claws and pain down her thigh, but Karis saw red. Dead red. Where the fuck was Kurt? Her back was against the stall, but she kicked viciously and landed one to the animal’s throat. It gasped and gagged, and she shoved it off her, scrambled to Ava just as Amos reached her.
“Do you want the bear?” Karis shrieked in the final moments she held onto her human skin.
Time slowed. She could see everything so clearly. Amos’s mountain lion ripping from him, the cougars above leaping toward her. Ava’s lips forming the word, “Yes.”
She’s ours. Kill them.
Karis’s scream turned to a roar as she finally, finally gave into the bear. She Changed just in time to take the first wave of cats that rammed into her. She ripped, shredded, and bit until two bodies skidded limply across the barn floor. Three more were on her back, but fuck it. She had work to do before that goddamn cat grew too big in Ava.
There was ripping pain across her back as she slammed down to all fours over Ava and sank her teeth into her shoulder. Deep or it wouldn’t take. Deep like her step-dad had done to her all those years ago. Deep like Trigger had done to Colt.
Ava arched her back and cried out in agony, but it couldn’t be helped. Karis would beg her forgiveness later, but right now she had to protect Ava’s Changing body. Amos would kill her if he realized what Karis had done. Oh, the bear she put in Ava would murder the cat that was struggling for survival in her right now. Karis was beast. Her animal was something these fucking cougars hadn’t dealt with before. They’d pushed her, and now for every drop of blood they’d drawn from her friend, Karis would make them wish they’d never been born.
Karis tried not to think. She blacked out to instinct as she hovered over Ava’s body. Her eyes were closed and she looked so pale. So pale.