Forever Hearts
Copyright 2014 Mia Rodriguez
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Table of Contents
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8: Valentina
Chapter 9
Chapter 10: Valentina
Chapter 11: Valentina
Chapter 12: Valentina
Chapter 13: Valentina
Chapter 14: Valentina
Chapter 15: Valentina
Chapter 16: Valentina
Chapter 17: Valentina
Chapter 18: Valentina
Chapter 19
Chapter 20: Valentina
Chapter 21: Valentina
Chapter 22: Valentina
Chapter 23
Chapter 24: Valentina
Chapter 25: Valentina
Chapter 26: Valentina
Chapter 27: Valentina
Chapter 28: Valentina
Chapter 29: Valentina
Chapter 30: Valentina
Chapter 31
Chapter 32: Valentina
Chapter 33: Valentina
Chapter 34: Valentina
Chapter 35: Valentina
Chapter 36: Valentina
Chapter 37
Chapter 38: Valentina
Chapter 39: Valentina
Chapter 40: Valentina
Chapter 41: Valentina
Chapter 42: Valentina
Chapter 43: Valentina
Chapter 44
Chapter 45: Valentina
Chapter 46: Valentina
Chapter 47: Valentina
Chapter 48: Valentina
Chapter 49: Valentina
Chapter 50: Valentina
Chapter 51: Valentina
Chapter 52: Valentina
Chapter 53: Valentina
Chapter 54: Valentina
Chapter 55: Valentina
Chapter 56
Chapter 57: Valentina
Chapter 58: Valentina
Chapter 59
Chapter 60
In the seeds of yesterday lay the foundations for today. For every ending there is a beginning . . .
Prologue
BOOM!!!
What happened?! An explosion!
Why is that sharp knife coming towards me?!
Chapter 1
“So tell me why you’re here,” coaxed Dr. Kate O’Leary from her black leather wingback chair facing Valeria Loya's one in the small, efficient, no frills psychiatry office.. Gently probing into the psyche of her patients was her specialty. If she dug too abruptly or too fast, she found it might shock the senses or collapse the internal process. Most of the time, patience and understanding worked best along with simple, non-threatening questions.
“I’ve got a problem with romantic relationships.”
Dr. O’Leary winced. She knew about those problems all too well and not just from inside the walls of her practice. “You do?”
“I’m forty-two years old and have never been able to commit,” stated Valeria, her long, curly, black hair flowing freely past her shoulders to her waist and her dark brown eyes frowning.
“Not ever?”
“No. I’ve got a real problem with intimacy.” Valeria’s voluptuous form closed off as she crossed her arms over her generous bosom.
“Tell me about it.”
“I fall in love or at least infatuation and then when I start getting serious, the nightmare comes.”
“The nightmare?”
“I’ve had this recurring nightmare all of my life.”
“You’ve had a recurring nightmare all of your life?”
“As far back as I can remember.”
Dr. O’Leary stopped writing in Valeria’s chart and her full attention went to her patient. “Even as a child?”
“Yes, even then.”
“Tell me about this nightmare,” Dr. O’Leary coaxed.
“There’s an explosion. A pregnant woman is lying on the ground. A really sharp knife is going towards her.”
“Who are you in this dream?”
“I’m the pregnant woman on the ground—the one who is unconscious.”
“Unconscious?” Dr. O’Leary asked, her voice probing.
“Why do I have this horrible nightmare?”
“Your dream can mean many things.”
“All I know is that I keep having the same exact nightmare over and over again.”
“It doesn’t change at all?”
“No, it always stays the same.”
Dr. O’Leary’s eyebrows knit together. “And you say you’ve had it since you were very small?”
“Imagine having a weird nightmare like that when you’re just out of diapers.”
“Pregnant woman, huh? Do you know the circumstances surrounding your birth?”
“I know where your heading, Dr. O’Leary. I’ve talked about this to my previous therapist. My mother insists my birth was very normal.”
Dr. O’Leary’s eyebrows didn’t loosen their tight stance. “I see.”
Valeria gritted her teeth. “It’s frustrating to hit a brick wall.”
“Don’t look at it like a brick wall,” soothed Dr. O’Leary. “It’s an opportunity to do some more exploration.”
“But—“
“Valeria, it’s a great opportunity,” she emphasized, her voice at its calmest. She found that the more wound up and stressed her patients were, the harder it was to get to the root of the problem. “We’ll explore your dream some more, okay?”
“Okay.”
“I just want to ask you some more questions, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Do you think this dream affects your romantic relationships?” asked Dr. O’Leary.
“I know it does. As soon as I get serious with a guy, I have the nightmare and it’s like everything inside shuts off,” explained Valeria. “I can’t go on with the relationship after that.”
“I see.”
“Until recently, I thought my romantic problems were over. Leonel and I have been in a solid relationship for over a year but then we got engaged and the nightmare came back. I’m having a full fledged panic attack.”
“Panic attack?”
“My heart beats fast, my palms sweat, and I hyperventilate when I think about my wedding day. I’ve been to several psychiatrists, and we’ve gone through everything from my childhood to my adulthood and we can’t figure out what’s wrong. You have no idea how many therapists have dissected everything about my nightmare and I’ve gotten nowhere. I’m pretty sure I’ve got something locked deep in my psyche.”
“We’ll get in there, Valeria.”
“You’re an expert hypnotist, right?—the best hypnotherapist in El Paso.”
“We'll get in your mind and see if you’re covering anything up.”
“Okay, great.”
Dr. O’Leary looked at her chart. “You don’t take any medication?”
“No.”
“No Prozac or anything like that?” Dr. O’Leary asked, surprised.
“No.”
“Nothing for anxiety?”
“Nope. I only feel anxious when I think about marriage.”
“We’ll do everything possible to get to the bottom of this. We’ll try to get to what’s locked in your subconscious.”
“I’m so re
lieved.”
They arranged for their next session. As soon as Valeria left, Dr. O’Leary sat at her desk and closed her eyes. While the session had been a little draining as most first sessions were, it was especially difficult with what was twisting in her anguished heart. The tragedy. She squeezed the top of her nose, between her eyes, with her thumb and her index finger. She took quick breaths in and out. So far she was making it through the week. Even though the tragedy had threatened to down her, she was surviving minute by minute, second by second.
At least her new patient was open, she thought. Many times she’d have closed people who even though they were there, resisted her help. But Valeria Loya seemed anxious to get to the root of her problem. That intense dream she kept having could have many explanations. But of one thing Dr. O’Leary was certain, her professional instincts kicking in full force, it held the key to whatever Valeria had locked deep inside.
Chapter 2
“How was your day, Katie?” asked a male voice as Kate O’Leary stepped in the door of her home.
Even after all the years of being with him, her lover still managed to jolt her at the first sight of him. His particular manly beauty with his dark-chocolate eyes, wavy deep-brown hair, and sunshine kissed skin that made his already rich sienna color even sexier, were almost too much for her.
“Fine,” she said, pecking his lips. It was so good to be home. Even though the house belonged to Enzo, she was the one who had decorated and the modern style of the décor eased her frail nerves. “How was your day, sweetheart?
“Summer school,” he said with annoyance. “Those restless kids can be such a pain, but I guess I knew what I was in for when I volunteered to work summers.”
Kate smiled. Even when he was complaining, his caring voice with the sexy, barely-there accent sounded like music. “You don’t fool me with all your moaning, Enzo. You love your job.”
He smiled back. “Don’t tell my students that.”
Kate nodded. “What would they do without you?” Like I have to do without Lindsey from now on, she thought as she went into the darkness inside her.
His concerned eyes swept over her. “Right now, it’s not my students I’m worried about.”
“You’re not worried about me, are you?”
“Of course I am,” he said intently. “Maybe you should’ve taken some more time off.”
“I’m fine.”
He stepped closer to her, his body only about an inch away. “Katie, you don’t look fine,” he declared quietly.
She ran her fingers over her naturally red bob. “I’m fine. Stop worrying about me.”
“You’re not fine,” he insisted gently.
“I am.”
“I’m here for you, Katie.”
“I know.”
“You don’t have to be strong.”
“I need to keep it together.”
“Not with me you don’t.”
“But Enzo—“
“Let it out, Katie.”
“I—“
“Let it out.”
Sobs of such unbelievable strength dislodged themselves from every part of her body that she collapsed like a grocery bag emptied of its food. He grabbed her before she could hit the floor and steadied her to the sofa that was next to them. Pulling her tightly to his chest, a non-stop flood of stale tears rushed out. Kate had only cried once, on the first day of learning of her best friend’s death. Enzo figured she had a whole dam built inside.
Tears fell one after another from her shiny green eyes. “Lindsey’s gone. Gone.”
“I’m so sorry, Katie.”
At the moment, Kate was so incredibly grateful to her lover—for his deep understanding, for his fortitude, for his unshakeable presence. At this critical juncture in her life, he was her rock. What would she have done without him? Thank goodness they lived together.
“Why did she have to die?” Kate asked with bitterness and anger. “Why?”
She tired to pull out from inside her head what she would tell her patients when they were having similar breakdowns, but she couldn’t find an answer that would satisfy her. Working with broken people from the outside to the inside didn’t compare to being inside an overwhelming storm. Knowing the textbook answers, the stages of grief, and dispersing helpful words was completely different from experiencing the pain. She realized the desperate truth to the adage; doctors make their own worst patients.
“I don’t have any answers for you, Katie, but all I can say is that I’m here for you.”
Chapter 3
“How old are you?” asked Dr. O’Leary. Valeria was already deeply hypnotized.
“I’m eleven-years-old,” said Valeria, her voice soft and tender.
“Where are you?”
“I’m having a picnic with my mom at a river in Mexico.”
“Are you having a good time?”
“Oh yeah!”
“So what’s happening?”
“I’m playing tag with my cousins and then . . . and then . . .” Valeria started grabbing her throat frantically and making choking sounds.
“For now, place yourself out of there as if you’re a spectator and tell me what’s happening with little Valeria.”
Valeria’s hands stopped jerking and a calm enveloped her. “Valeria fell into the river. Nothing like this has ever happened to her. She got too close to the edge.”
“What’s happening to her?”
“Water is enveloping her, dragging her down. It’s an undertow.”
“She’s drowning?” Dr. O’Leary asked with a pained voice as Lindsey’s own death came at her like a train out of nowhere.
“She yells and screams, and her mother jumps in the river and saves her.”
“What happens after that?” Dr. O’Leary asked anxiously.
“Valeria never wants to be away from her mother’s arms.”
“Valeria is very close to her mother?” asked Dr. O’Leary.
“Yes, very.”
“How does she feel when she’s with her mother?”
“Taken care of and very safe.”
“So her mother provides a safety net for her?”
“Yes.”
“At the count of three, you’ll wake up and remember everything—one, two, three.”
Valeria’s eyes fluttered open. Feeling as if she had awoken from a vivid dream, she looked at Dr. O’Leary with bleary eyes.
“How are you feeling, Valeria?” asked Dr. O’Leary.
“Fine but . . .”
“But what?”
“I had never realized that I almost drowned when I was a kid.”
“You must’ve buried it deep inside you because it was so traumatic.”
“Is that normal?” asked Valeria. “It’s not like I actually drowned and had to be revived or anything.”
“Certain events are more painful to some people than to others.”
“That explains why I’ve never been able to get in the water. While my cousins were having a great time swimming, I’d always stay with my mother.”
“In her arms you found safety.”
“My mom and dad live only a few blocks from me.”
“I imagine you’re very close to them.”
“Yes, very. Do you think that that’s why I keep having the nightmare where an unborn child needs to be saved from a dangerous situation while inside an unconscious woman?”
“Maybe.”
“Do you think that I can’t commit to a man because I don’t want to leave the safety of my mom?”
“Maybe. I still want to regress you further to see if there isn’t something else.”
“Okay, Dr. O’Leary.”
“We’ll take it slow like today to make sure we ease you where you need to go.”
“Sounds good.”
Valeria stepped out into the waiting room where she arranged her next appointment through Dr. O’Leary’s receptionist. A few minutes later, she
returned with a handsome man of average build and dark-brown hair.
“Dr. O’Leary,” Valeria said, smiling. “I want to introduce you to my fiancé. This is Leonel.”
Dr. O’Leary stuck out her hand and he immediately took it, pumping it with energy.
“I’m glad to meet you, Leonel,” Dr. O’Leary said, surprised at his enthusiasm for shaking her hand.
“I’m thrilled to meet you, Dr. O’Leary. “Just thrilled. “I can’t thank you enough for what you’re doing for Val.”
“Please don’t thank me. I’m just doing my job.”
“We have so much hope for this treatment,” he explained.
“We’re going to try our best,” Dr. O’Leary affirmed, nodding at Valeria.
As they left, Dr. O’Leary stared out her oversized wall window to the vigorous movement below. Since her office was on the second floor of the building, she could clearly see the noisy beehive and frenetic energy that was downtown El Paso, Texas. She didn’t pay attention to the busy streets, or the other skyscrapers; she was deep in her mind.
Are you anywhere out there, my friend? Dr. O’Leary wondered. Valeria had been so lucky in not drowning unlike Lindsey who hadn’t had anybody to pull her out of the ocean and into safety. Instead, Lindsey’s lifeless shell had floated to the shore. Damn it! How many times had she tried to convince Lindsey to stop with the extreme sports? But her best friend had refused and had kept courting danger until she ended up dead in Hawaii. Dead in paradise—how did that make any sense? But Lindsey had gone surfing during a bad storm and only her empty body had come back. Where the rest of her had gone had become the magic question.
Where are you, Lindsey?
Where?
She’s nowhere, Dr. O’Leary chided herself, trying to stop the misplaced hope from growing in her mind. She had stopped believing in an afterlife so long ago that she could hardly remember when she believed in one.
Lindsey's nowhere.
Chapter 4
“Hi, beautiful,” Enzo said as soon as Kate stepped in the front door. As usual, he sat on the simple, jet-black, leather sofa and graded papers on a tinted glass cocktail table.
“Hello, handsome,” Kate gushed, pecking his lips. Coming home to him was the best part of the day. “How were the kids today?”
“Actually,” he said, smiling, “they were very good.”
“Must be their teacher.”
He chuckled. “Must be the riot act I read them yesterday,” he stated, eyeing her. “How are you today, Katie?”
Kate sat next to him, shoulder to shoulder, and he put his arm around her. His nearness filled her with warmth and calm. “Better.”
“Really?” he asked anxiously.