Chapter 24
Sarah
Angel never showed up for his shift at the restaurant. Alex had to come in for him and wasn’t too happy about it. All he said was Angel had called him at the last minute to tell him he wouldn’t make it because something had come up that he’d explain later. Both Alex and Sofie were surprised Sarah didn’t know where he was, but she didn’t explain about their fight. She didn’t want to talk to anybody about it until she talked to him first, though she had called Sydney before her shift in tears. She’d tried and tried to get a hold of Angel and texted him several times until she finally gave up, but she was beginning to worry now.
It was closing time, and no one had heard from him yet. “You still haven’t talked to Angel?” Alex asked, walking into the back room. “You two have a fight or something?”
“No, I haven’t,” Sarah said, closing the cabinet where she’d just stuffed her apron into then turned to Alex, who was leaning over the desk checking something on the computer. “And, yeah, we sort of did,” she finally admitted.
Alex glanced back at her and stared at her for a moment; then his face soured. “Is that what this is all about?”
“I don’t know,” she said, quickly regretting that she may’ve inadvertently gotten Angel in hot water. “We had an argument on the phone, but I don’t know why he’s not here or where he is.”
The rock that had started forming in her stomach the moment she dialed Angel today was now an unbearable boulder. She’d forgotten how intense he could be when he was that angry.
Alex started to say something when his buzzing phone on the desk distracted him. A few seconds later her own phone dinged in her purse, and she dug for it quickly. It was a text from Angel, and she exhaled in relief as she clicked on it. It was a photo, the photo Romero had apparently taken of her and Leo the moment she’d touched his tattoo. From that angle, they did appear to be standing incredibly close, and her insides tightened even more. Another text came through from Angel and then another and another until she had about six in a row with the same damn picture.
With her eyes beginning to blur, she responded calmly.
Where are you? We need to talk.
“Is that Angel?” Alex asked.
She nodded but didn’t want to look up so he wouldn’t see her teary eyes.
“Ignore him. He’s drunk.”
Now she looked up, but Alex was looking down at his phone texting. “Is he texting you too?”
“No, Romero is,” he said without looking up. “I’m gonna have to pick his drunk ass up and take him back to my place. My mom will freak if she sees him as drunk as Romero says he is.”
Her phoned dinged with another text from Angel, and she clicked on it, expecting to see another stupid picture again, but it was a text.
U love him 2?
She brought her hand to her mouth as the emotion took over. “I’m going with you,” she said to Alex as she responded to Angel’s text.
I love YOU.
Wiping the tear from the corner of her eye, she glanced up at Alex, who frowned. “I told you to ignore him, sweetheart. You don’t wanna be around him right now. Trust me. Romero says he’s being obnoxious.” He smirked, slipping his phone in his pocket. “And if Romero’s saying that, I can only imagine how stupid he’s acting.”
“I still wanna go with you,” she said. “Please?”
Alex pressed his lips together but nodded. “Okay, but if he says anything stupid to you, I’m gonna have to kick his ass.”
The enormity of this dawned on Sarah as she gathered her things. Angel was so angry with her he’d needed time away from her today. What if he was even angrier than she’d first thought? He’d never done anything like this before—not shown up for his shift because he was mad at her then gotten so drunk someone had to go get him. What if he needed more than just a day away from her? What if he asked for a break because he couldn’t stand to be around her for a while? Seeing that damning photo, she now understood why he was so upset.
He’d probably obsessed over it all day like she knew she would’ve if it’d been him and another girl. What if he needed more than a break?
I’d never get over something like that.
Swallowing back the terrifying thoughts the entire time Alex closed everything down in a rush, she followed him out to his car with an enormous knot at her throat.
“So was this like a big fight or what?” Alex asked as they pulled out into the street.
“Yeah,” she whispered, staring out the window but offered no more.
In hindsight, she understood perfectly now why Angel had been so upset. She was actually ashamed now that she hadn’t just told Leonardo to go to hell and driven away. Then she remembered she had tried that.
Still.
She should’ve left the moment that guy whose car she hit drove away. Why had she stayed? Why did she need to know why he did it? This was so not worth it.
Thankfully, Alex didn’t press for anything more. She was certain the tears running down her face had everything to do with it. They reached Romero’s place. Like Alex, Romero had recently moved into his own bachelor pad.
Romero opened the door with a smirk. The music was on loud, and Sarah thought she heard Angel singing. Romero laughed, but the moment he saw Sarah, he stopped laughing. “Dude,” he said to Alex. “Not a good idea, man.”
Alex turned back to Sarah with a look of concern then turned back to Romero. “That bad?’
“Yes!”
Angel sang along to whatever song was playing, and both Romero and Alex looked at each other for a serious moment then cracked up. Sarah might’ve laughed too if her insides weren’t completely churning. She’d never seen or heard Angel so drunk. Making out the lyrics he was butchering only made her feel worse. He only got one part right, but it was enough.
“’Cause this time could mean goodbye!”
Romero laughed again but then got all serious when Alex started walking in with Sarah just behind him. “I’m telling you, man, he’s gonna lose it when he sees her.”
“No, he’s not,” Alex said, walking in.
Having second thoughts about being there, Sarah stayed at the door.
Angel turned from where he was hunched over on Romero’s counter when he saw Alex and smiled. Then he saw Sarah, and it wiped the smile right off. “Why is she here?” he asked Alex then turned to Sarah and asked even louder. “Why are you here?”
“Because . . .” she started to say but could barely get the words out.
“Why?” he demanded even louder, looking back at Alex. “I don’t want her here.”
“Shut your mouth!” Alex said, shoving him.
“I don’t want her here,” Angel repeated the hurtful words then turned to Sarah. “You hear me? I don’t wanna see you right now!”
“Yeah, well this isn’t your place,” Alex snapped back. “And Romero doesn’t want your loud drunk ass here either. Grab your shit and let’s go.”
Sarah pulled her phone out, feeling like an idiot for having insisted on coming with Alex. Clearly Angel was in no condition to talk. This was a side of him she’d never seen, and she felt her heart tearing apart hearing him speak to her that way. There was no way was she getting in the same car with him. She walked away from the door to call Valerie.
“Where is she going?” she heard Angel ask loudly.
“You just told her you didn’t want her here, you dumb ass,” Alex said.
He called out for her again, but she ignored him and kept walking.
“Sarah,” Angel called out again a little louder, and she turned to see him at the door. “Who are you calling?”
“Valerie,” she said, wiping the tears away from her face.
“Why?”
“So she can come pick me up.”
He hurried to her, and Alex walked out of the apartment behind him. Sarah put her phone down before dialing Valerie, waiting for him but not sure what to expect. Angel’s rigid expression softened the moment
he got close enough to see her better in the dark. “Why are you crying?”
“Why do you think?” she said, trying not to sound too angry, but she was only it was mostly at herself.
He took a step forward. “Why’d you come here?”
“Because I wanted to talk to you, but—”
“About what? About him?” he asked, but he didn’t sound nearly as angry as he had earlier on the phone or when he said he didn’t want her there. He sounded scared now.
“No, about us.” She gulped back the emotion, glad that Alex had stayed behind with Romero and had given them a moment.
“What about us?” Angel asked, his eyes going a little wild. “What are you saying?”
“Nothing bad,” she said, reaching out to touch his face, and he immediately pulled her to him, hugging her hard and kissing the side of her head.
“You love me?” he asked frantically.
“Yes!” she said. “Of course I do.”
“Do you have feelings for him?”
“No!” She pulled away so she could look him in the eyes when she assured of him of that. “No, I don’t, not at all.”
She wanted to ask him how he could possibly think that, but she knew why, and she didn’t want to bring up the pictures. This would be the worst time ever to bring that up.
He stared at her for a moment then hugged her again tightly. “Don’t call Valerie,” he whispered against her ear. “Come back to Alex’s place with me. Spend the night.”
“Okay,” Alex said loudly behind them. “All better. Let’s go. I don’t have all night. Sarah, sweetheart, you need a ride back to the restaurant to get your car or—”
“Nah,” Angel said, turning back to look at him. “She’s coming with me back to your place.” He turned back to Sarah. “Right?”
Alex chuckled as he opened his truck door. “Really? Because in there you said—”
“Shut up,” Angel said but kept his eyes on Sarah.
This was the Angel she knew and loved, and she couldn’t help but smile, a bit relieved, and then nod. Seeing the big smile on his face and feeling his big arms around her again made her feel even better, but she knew they still had a lot to talk about. The alcohol had obviously effected his impulsive reaction to both seeing her and then not wanting her to leave his side. Tomorrow morning, when he was thinking clearer, would be when his real feelings and everything she knew the alcohol was numbing now would come out.
~~~
Sarah had been right about them not getting any productive talking done last night. For starters, he passed out halfway back to Alex’s place. Then when they woke him to get him from the truck and into Alex’s place, he’d gone from peering at her suspiciously as if he knew he was mad at her but couldn’t remember why, to telling her how much he loved her then repeating, “I’ll kill him,” again and again, but she didn’t dare comment. He kept this up until he finally passed out for the night.
She’d spent a better part of the night tossing and turning next to him on the futon they’d shared in Alex’s front room until exhaustion finally did her in.
They both had only one class on Fridays, and she was pretty sure they weren’t going to make it today. She’d woken early and slipped out of bed, leaving Angel a note that she was tagging along with Alex to the restaurant so she could pick up her car and come back for him. She stopped on the way back to pick up breakfast sandwiches and coffee since Alex had warned her he still didn’t have a coffee machine yet.
When she got back to Alex’s place, the futon was upright and the blankets they’d used were folded neatly. Angel was in the shower. Immediately, her stomach was in knots again. As drunk as he’d been last night, she sort of expected him to be out a lot longer this morning.
Picking at the breakfast sandwich as she stood in the kitchen, thinking about her impending conversation with Angel, Sarah wondered why she’d bothered buying food. She had zero appetite, and she had a feeling Angel’s stomach wouldn’t be feeling the greatest.
The water in the shower had been off for a few minutes, and she heard the door open. Within moments, Angel was in the kitchen behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and leaning into her neck, but said nothing. Sarah took a deep breath and waited.
“I’m sorry if I was an idiot or anything last night. I don’t remember much, but Alex did text me saying I should apologize.”
She shook her head. “No need to. Alex had warned me it probably wasn’t a good idea for me to come with him, knowing how much you’d been drinking.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever been that drunk,” he said, cringing. “My head is killing me.”
“You should’ve stayed in bed.” She turned around to face him, touching his temple lightly. “I might have aspirin in my purse.”
Angel shook his head. “I already took two.” He reached for the coffee mug on the counter, taking a step away from her. “Listen, we gotta talk.”
“I know,” she said, surprised at how fast he was getting to it. “I need to explain—”
“I went to have a drink with Bruxa yesterday after I got off the phone with you.”
Sarah’s mouth fell open, and she took a step away from him. “Bruxa?”
“Yeah,” he said, reaching out for her, but she pulled away. “It was stupid. I was mad and I needed a drink. She—”
“The slut who told Valerie’s friend she’d fuck you in a heartbeat, anywhere, anytime, girlfriend or not?”
“I texted Romero,” he said quickly, ignoring her comment and taking another step toward her, but she held up her hand with a murderous glare, so he stopped. “I texted him to come pick me up before we even got to the bar. I had one drink with her before he got there, and then I left. I’m sorry, okay? I wasn’t thinking straight, but I had no intention of doing anything with her. I swear to you.”
Just the thought of knowing Angel had obviously jumped in that bitch’s car since Romero had to go get him had Sarah feeling sick. But she got it. She believed that he wasn’t thinking straight. The hurt in his voice yesterday was something she could feel even through the phone. It was why she’d been so scared thinking maybe he’d ask for a break—or more.
With the ugliness in her stomach and wanting this to be as ugly as it got today, Sarah decided she wouldn’t dwell on this but she might as well get this over with now.
“That photo you saw,” she said, and the panic in his face was instantly replaced with a hard stare. “The one of me touching his arm is not what you’re thinking.”
Angel looked away, bringing both hands to his head and began to pace. She knew now this is what had done it. This is what had made him go ape shit yesterday, and she needed to explain.
“I saw the picture, Sarah. You lifted his shirt, touched his fucking—”
“When I was in Havasu,” she said loudly before he got too heated, “I’d asked him about the tattoo on his arm. Two L’s. He said it had something to do with the gang he was in long ago. Yesterday, when he told me the truth about everything, I was stunned. Incredibly so, but I also felt really stupid. Stupid for having fallen for everything I was told so easily. When I saw the tattoo on his arm again yesterday, it dawned on me that it had nothing to do with a gang. It was suddenly so clear to me, and I had to take a closer look at it because I couldn’t believe it never occurred to me those were his initials. That’s the first thing anyone would think if they saw two letters like that tattooed on anyone but not my gullible ass since, of course, that would mean his last name wasn’t Ortiz. I just . . .” She shook her head, looking away and feeling mad at herself again. “I believed everything he told me so easily. But I know now why I did. I wanted to. If I didn’t, then I’d be admitting that maybe it wasn’t true. I don’t even know why I wanted it so bad. The idea of having more family just grew on me so fast, and when Omar disappeared, I was determined that Leonardo wouldn’t.”
She took a cautious step forward, afraid he’d reject her coming close as she had done to him just moments ago. He didn??
?t, so she got close enough to reach for his hand and took it. He dropped her hand then wrapped his arms around her neck so fast it startled her, but she brought her arms around him and hugged him back with just as much emotion as he did her.
This was over. She didn’t want to fight anymore—dwell on the fact that she didn’t have a brother and her father hadn’t really come looking for her—or even spend another minute speculating what Angel’s real intentions were when he decided to have a drink with Bruxa in that moment when he’d been so consumed with rage and hurt feelings. All that mattered was that he hadn’t done so and that Sarah could now fully appreciate what she did have and had for years. Something so many people in the world didn’t. She had Angel and all his love for her.
“I’m sorry this turned out the way it did,” he said, kissing the side of her head. “I really am. No matter who Leo turned out to be or why he really wanted to get close to you, I truly am sorry this didn’t turn out like you’d hoped.” He pulled back to look at her, moving some of the hair away from her face. “Even when he was weirding me the fuck out, not once did I wish for things to end this way. If it had turned out that he was your brother, regardless of how weird he was, I would’ve dealt with it. You know that, right? The last thing I’d ever want is to see you hurt.”
She smiled, seeing the genuine empathy in his eyes, which moments ago began to look as enraged as he sounded yesterday.
“I’m fine about it now,” she assured him. “To be honest, I don’t even know what I was expecting? That he and Omar and I would be taking Christmas portraits together or something ridiculous? I don’t know. He talked about me having other uncles and aunts and cousins, and it excited me. I guess I just thought after it being just my mom and me my whole life more would be a good change.”
Angel nodded, but that look of empathy she’d seen in his eyes just a second ago was suddenly gone, and that familiar intensity was back. “I get it, okay? And I didn’t lie when I said I would’ve dealt with Leo had he actually been your brother. But let me ask you something.” He stopped and chewed his bottom lip almost as if he wanted to be sure about what he was about to ask. “You’re not thinking of staying in touch with Leo are you?”