Chapter 6
Lessons of the Past
Devon rubbed the stubble on his chin. “What do you remember about Simon Kerr – sorry, I mean, your dad?”
Rae stared at Devon. She couldn’t figure how he’d hidden the scared look on his face so fast. One moment it was there, and the next…it was like he’d closed the shutters over his emotions. “He wasn’t around much, to be honest. He always seemed to be gone for work, or whatever he did.” Rae tried to think, cocking her head to one side as she sifted through her dreams and memories. She straightened when she realized they were the same – her dreams were actually her memories. It’d all been real.
Shifting slightly, Devon remained silent beside her.
“It’s funny now,” Rae murmured. “I’ve never noticed before, but it’s like every memory I have of him seems to be about magic tricks or some sorta dream. One time, I remember being very little, maybe three or four at the time. It’s one of my first memories, but I remember he made my toys float around the room. He could make my puppets dance without touching them. Another time, he made the rain go away when I wanted to play outside.” She remembered sitting by the large bay window at the back of the house, one moment singing the old nursery song and the next, the sun burst through the clouds.
Rae coughed as another memory rushed forward. One she’d tried to suppress a long time ago. “When I was about five…he got mad at me one night. I’d been crying about monsters under my bed. He came into my room really pissed off, and told me the monsters that lived in our house didn’t hide under beds or in closets. They were out in the open and fearless. I, of course, started screaming because what five year old isn’t terrified of monsters? And now he’d just told me they weren’t scared of anything and didn’t have to hide. Basically, they were going to get me.” What kind of person would do that to a child?
She exhaled, trying to calm the anxiety rising inside her that came with the memory. She tucked a long, Shirley Temple curl behind her ear and flipped her hand. “Anyway, my mom came running into the room. She was so ticked, and they started fighting, which only scared me more. In the end, she picked me up and carried me to her bed. I stayed there all night, and when I woke up in the morning, my dad had already left. Not like he was around much, anyway.”
Devon reached out toward her, but Rae shifted so he couldn’t touch her shoulder. She wasn’t looking for pity. Staring straight ahead, she contemplated that night so long ago. It had always seemed more like a bad dream than a memory. She’d been terrified to sleep with the closet doors open and begged her mom to put stuff under her bed. She also slept with a night-light for years after she’d arrived in America. It seemed so long ago, nothing but little kid stuff. She brought her gaze back to Devon.
He sat, picking at his clean fingernails. “I think your dad was right. There were monsters in your house… he was one of them.”
Surprised, Rae’s mouth dropped open. She didn’t know what to say.
“He had one of the most powerful tatùs.” He brought his head up and looked directly at her. “From what I’ve been told, he got greedy and began to use it for himself.”
“Is that such a bad thing? It was his tatt—tatù. His ink.”
“It goes against the code of our society. The more power he got, the more he wanted. He was insatiable. He didn’t agree with the teachings at the school or helping humankind. He did as he pleased, at any cost. Your dad must’ve had some demons or monsters that took him to the dark side. He liked what they enabled him to do, and what he was able to gain. Others liked it as well and joined him; his ideas and philosophy were very convincing.” Devon stopped talking and bit his lip. He seemed as if he wished he could take back some of the words he’d said.
The sins of the father are the sins of the son, or the daughter. Uncle Argyle’s words hissed inside Rae’s head. She kicked a small rock on the ground and it ricocheted off the brick wall of the Oratory.
Devon jumped, startled from the noise.
“What was my father’s ink?” Rae whispered.
Devon kept silent for a moment. He let out a sigh and shifted in his seat to face her. He bounced his foot, his leg shaking the entire bench with its rhythm. “His looked like a Warlock or Sorcerer…something like that.”
Rae hated the silence that followed. The quiet screamed the truth she didn’t want to hear. Her eyes rounded in horror as she thought about the fire. She grabbed Devon’s forearm.
“My father started the fire, didn’t he? He wanted me and my mother out of the picture! He…” Rae tried to swallow the lump in her throat, unable to continue. Silent tears coursed down her cheeks, and her heart hammered out a funky, erratic rhythm. She covered her face with her hands. No wonder her uncle hated her dad. No wonder everyone stared at her like she was some sort of demon or monster.
“Rae, listen to me.” Devon put his fingers on Rae’s chin, turning her face so that she had to look at him. He wiped her tears away as he talked. “No one knows exactly what happened. A lot of people can speculate, but we don’t actually know. You were there, and if you can’t remember, no one can.”
She shook her head. She was already deep in the memory of that horrible night when her parents had died. There was a fire. Her mother had told her in a calm voice to go to the tree house, but added that she needed to get out as fast as she could. Rae’d dashed out and climbed up the ladder as fast as her little legs could take her. Then she’d waited and waited. She’d gotten bored and started coloring with her new multi pack of markers. The burst of heat and flames from the house had hit like an explosion. Terrified, she’d stayed put until the fire no longer looked like it was reaching out to grab her. A nice fireman noticed her climbing down the ladder and brought her to an ambulance out front. People in uniforms, and suits, and gawkers swarmed her yard and she felt lost in a sea of strangers. Then her uncle arrived and took her away with him. He’d lived in Scotland at the time. They immigrated to the U.S. shortly after.
Devon quietly cleared his throat. “Don’t get caught up in the past. You have your entire life in front of you. When you get inked, you’ll be here, at Guilder, surrounded by people who care about you.” He reached out and wiped away a tear trickling down her cheek.
“I’m sorry.” She pushed his hands away as she stood up, angry at herself for crying in front of him, a stranger. “A lot of stuff I never realized suddenly makes sense now. My dad wasn’t such a great guy.” It was no wonder her uncle had taken her to America – away from this society of gifted people, away so the memories became dreams instead of reality, away to pretend that none of it was real. But then why did he send me back here? Is he afraid of me? Afraid of what I might become?
Devon stood up. He reached out as if to hold her, but then stuffed his hands into his pockets. He waited a few moments as Rae composed herself before he started talking again. “Hey, everything’s going to be fine. I’m sorry I said too much tonight. I should’ve just let Headmaster Lanford tell you everything. I feel like an idiot opening my stupid mouth.”
Rae turned, and walked to where Devon stood. She gave him a quick hug and instantly let go, slightly embarrassed. “Don’t apologize. It’s okay. It just shows me how much of a friend you’re going to be. You hardly know me. Yet you know all about my past and never, for one moment, judged me the way the other students have.”
Devon stared down at the ground for a moment, like he didn’t want to see the look on her face. “There’s more stuff you’re gonna hear, and you might not like it. The truth doesn’t always feel good, but it’s the truth, and it’s better than being misled. You’ll handle it.”
Rae thought about her uncle. He’d totally lied to her by not saying anything. Realizing she’d been lost in her own thoughts, she almost missed the rest of what Devon was saying.
“… Enjoy the next few months of learning, and when the day does come, you’ll be ready. It’s the best day in the entire world.”
“My birthday?” She zoned into the conversation with Dumbo ears. Rae
started pacing in front of the bench. “What’s it like? Do you just wake up with some miraculous change and then start being all gifted and stuff?”
Devon laughed. “It doesn’t quite work like that. Look, I’ve talked enough tonight. We can discuss more during one of our tutoring sessions, and you’ll learn more in your classes. It’s getting close to ten and the dorms get locked then. I don’t think Madame Elpis would appreciate it if Rae Kerrigan’s late.”
Rae looked up to the night sky and heaved a sigh. “Great! I need to act like an angel or everyone’s going to believe I’m some sort of demon.” Devil’s spawn from her father was what she wanted to say. “I’m going to have to be on my best behavior for the next three months.”
“Don’t worry. I’ll make sure you still have fun. If I haven’t mentioned it, I have some great connections to some very gifted people. Come on, I’ll walk you back to your dorm. Why don’t we plan on starting your tutoring next week? We can meet in the library at Aumbry House. Then you won’t have to worry about getting in trouble with curfew.”
“Sounds like a good idea to me. It’s Molly’s birthday tomorrow. I feel a little guilty. I didn’t go out and buy her a gift, even something little. She is my roommate after all.”
“She’s already getting the best present anyone at sixteen could ever wish for.” Devon laughed. “I can pull some strings in the kitchen for you. I’m sure I can get Sally, our chef, to make a cake at breakfast tomorrow. Molly might get a kick out of that.”
“Awesome. I’ll owe you big time.” Despite the darkness, Rae still looked away so Devon couldn’t see her blush. She was seriously developing a huge crush on him.
“Let’s see what your tatù is. I might take you up on that.”
He elbowed her. “Just kidding.”
Rae’s watch beeped, reminding her of the time. Curfew. They both stood and walked back to Aumbry House. Rae started up the steps to the front door. She turned to wave good-bye, but he’d already gone.
She ran up the last few steps to the front door just as Madame Elpis came walking out of her suite, big brass key in hand. Her brows came together as she stared down the length of her nose at Rae. Rae dropped her head, staring at the floor as she passed her, and ran toward the marble steps as fast as she could.
Halfway up to the first floor, she caught sight of the pay phone below her on the main floor. She turned and glanced around for Madame Elpis. The headmistress must’ve gone into her room already. Rae dashed over to the pay phone and dialed the overseas numbers for a collect call to her uncle. He had some explaining to do. She’d rather talk to him down here with no one around than argue with him in the room where Molly’s ears would absorb every little word, and probably repeat it to anyone who would listen.
After ten rings, she hung up. She’d forgotten about the time change. Her aunt and uncle were probably out for dinner. She’d have to try again in the morning.
Rae trotted into her room, deep in thought. She glanced up to see Molly standing in front of the full-length mirror, trying to see her behind her. The girl had another mirror in her hand, trying to angle it so she could see if there was anything on her lower back.
When she noticed Rae, Molly grinned sheepishly. “I’m curious if there’re any pre-ink, or if I’ll just wake up tomorrow with it. Nobody will tell me what’s going to happen.”
“I wish I could help you. I have no idea.” Rae walked over and squinted as she checked Molly’s skin. It was completely smooth and spotless. “Sorry. I don’t see a thing.”
“Nothing? Crap! Well, be prepared for screeching and wailing tomorrow morning.” Molly stomped her foot. “Shoot! I wish it was morning now. I’m never going to be able to sleep tonight.”
Rae could see this was going to be a long night if her roommate continued to be all Molly-ish about it. As interested as she was about the process, she’d had a really long and draining day and wanted to get some sleep. She had to think fast. “Maybe the ink process acts like the tooth fairy. It won’t come unless you’re asleep. If you stay awake, then maybe it’ll wait until you’re not paying attention to mark you.”
“What? Heck, then what’re we waiting for? Hurry. Let’s get to bed. We need to have the lights out, curtains shut and both of us asleep so I can hurry up and get inked. This is going to take forever if I’m awake all night.” Rae gave herself a mental high-five. Mission accomplished.
“Sounds good to me. I’m exhausted again.” Rae headed to the bathroom. When she returned, she saw that Molly had already closed the curtains. She lay curled up in her bed, covers pulled up tight. She popped her head up just as Rae reached for the light switch.
“Oh, I forgot to tell you. Dean Carter stopped by. He wants you to meet him in his office after breakfast tomorrow.”
Rae’s brain registered the name, realizing that this was also someone she wanted to talk to, but she felt too tired to get excited. “Thanks.” Rae yawned and snuggled down in her covers. “Now get some sleep so we can find out what hidden talent’s going to wake up inside of you.”