CHAPTER XXVIII
THE TWO SENORAS.
While Captain Tiago was fighting his lasak against the bulik,Dona Victorina took a walk through the town, with the intention ofseeing the condition of the indolent natives, and of their housesand fields. She had dressed as elegantly as she could, putting allher ribbons and flowers on her silk gown, in order to impress theprovincials, and make them see how great a distance was betweenthem and her sacred person. Giving her arm to her lame husband, shefluttered through the streets of the town, among the stupefied andwondering inhabitants. Cousin Linares had remained in the house.
"What ugly houses these natives have," began Dona Victorina, making agrimace. "I don't know how they can live there: one must be a nativeto do it. They meet us and don't uncover their heads! Hit them overthe head as the curates and tenientes of the Guardia Civil do whenthey don't take off their hats. Teach them manners."
"And if they hit me?" asked Dr. de Espadana.
"Aren't you a man?"
"Bu--bu--but, I am la--la--lame."
Dona Victorina was becoming bad-humored. The streets were not paved,and the train of her gown was covered with dust. Besides, they met manyyoung women, who, on passing her, cast down their eyes and did notadmire her lavish dress as they should have done. Sinang's coachman,who was driving her and her cousin in an elegant carriage, had theimpudence to call out tabi [20] to them in such a warning voicethat she had to get out of the way, and was only able to exclaim,"Look at that brute of a coachman! I am going to tell his master thathe should educate his servants better!"
"Let us go back to the house," she ordered her husband.
He, fearing that there was going to be a storm, turned on his heelsand obeyed the command.
They met the alferez on the way back and greeted him. He increasedthe discontent of Dona Victorina, for he not only failed to complimenther on her dress, but surveyed it almost with a mocking manner.
"You ought not to extend your hand to a simple alferez," said sheto her husband as soon as they were some distance away. "He scarcelytouches his helmet, and you take off your hat. You don't know how tomaintain your rank."
"He is ch--ch--chief here!"
"And what does that matter to us? Are we, perchance, natives?"
"You are right," replied he, not wishing to quarrel.
They passed by the officer's house. Dona Consolacion was in the window,as usual, dressed in her flannel outfit and smoking her cigar. Asthe house was rather low, they could see each other as they passed,and Dona Victorina could distinguish her very well. The Muse of theGuardia Civil examined her with tranquillity from head to foot, and,afterward, sticking out her lower lip, spit, turning her face to theother side. That put an end to Dona Victorina's patience, and, leavingher husband without any support, she squared herself in front of thealfereza, trembling with rage, and unable to speak. Dona Consolacionturned her head slowly, looked her over again, and then spit again,but with still greater disdain.
"What is the matter with you, Dona?" said the alfereza.
"Can you tell me, Senora, why you look at me so? Are you envious?" DonaVictorina finally succeeded in saying.
"I envious of you?" said the Medusa with scorn. "O, yes! I envythose curls."
"Come, wife!" said the doctor. "Do--don't take no--no--notice of her!"
"Let me give this shameless common person a lesson!" replied the woman,giving her husband a push. He nearly fell to the ground. Turning toDona Consolacion, she continued:
"Look how you treat me! Don't think that I am a provincial, or asoldiers' querida! In my house in Manila alferezas never are allowedto come in. They wait at the door."
"Oh-oh! Most Excellent Senora! Alferezas don't enter, but invalidslike that out there. Ha, ha, ha!"
If it hadn't been for all the paint on her face, one could have seenDona Victorina blush. She wanted to throw herself upon her enemy,but the sentry stopped her. In the meantime, the street was fillingup with curious people.
"Listen! I lower myself talking with you. People of categoria ... Doyou want my clothes to wash? I will pay you well. Do you think thatI don't know that you are a washerwoman?"
Dona Consolacion became furious. The reference to her being awasherwoman wounded her.
"Do you think that we do not know what you are? Get out! My husband hasalready told me. Senora, I, at least, have not belonged to more thanone man, but you? One must be pretty hard up to take the leavings."
This shot struck Dona Victorina square in the breast. She rolled upher sleeves, clenched her fists, and, gnashing her teeth, began:
"Come down here, you nasty old thing, that I may smash your filthymouth."
The Medusa disappeared quickly from the window, but was soon seencoming down the stairs on a run, swinging her husband's whip.
Don Tiburcio interposed, pleading with them, but they would have cometo blows if the alferez had not arrived.
"But, senoras!... Don Tiburcio!"
"Teach your woman better; buy her better clothes. If you haven'tthe money, rob the people. You have your soldiers for that!" shoutedDona Victorina.
"Senora," said the alferez furiously. "Thank yourself that I don'tforget that you are a woman; for if you were not, I would kick youto pieces, with all your curls and ribbons."
"Se--se--senor al--alferez!" said Don Tiburcio.
"Go ahead! Kill us! You don't wear big enough trousers, you quack."
And so the battle waged: words, gestures, cries, insults, andinjuries. They brought out all the nasty things they could think of,all four speaking at the same time, and, saying so many things andbringing to light so many truths, that we will not relate here allthat was said. The people who had gathered around to satisfy theircuriosity, if they understood all the remarks, must have enjoyedthemselves not a little. They were all waiting to see them come toblows. Unfortunately for the spectators, the curate came along andpacified them.
"Senoras! senoras! What a shame. Senor alferez."
"What are you meddling in these matters for, you hypocrite, youCarlist?"
"Don Tiburcio, take away your wife! Senora, hold your tongue!"
"Tell that to those robbers of the poor!"
Finally, the dictionary of epithets was exhausted. The review of thedisgraces of each couple was ended, and little by little they wereseparated, threatening and insulting each other. Father Salvi keptgoing from one side to the other, adding life to the scene.
"This very day we will go to Manila and we will present ourselvesto the Governor General," said Dona Victorina, in fury to herhusband. "You are not a man. It is a shame that you spend moneyfor trousers."
"B--b--but, wife, and the Guardia Civil? I--I--am lame."
"You must challenge him to a duel with pistol or sword or, or----"
And Dona Victorina looked at his false teeth.
"Daughter, I never have used----"
Dona Victorina did not let him finish. With a sublime movement shejerked out his false teeth in the middle of the street, and throwingthem to the ground stepped on them. He, half crying, and she sputteringaway, arrived at the house. At that time, Linares was talking withMaria Clara, Sinang, and Victoria, and, as he knew nothing about thequarrel, the sudden arrival of his cousins gave him a shock. MariaClara was lying on a sofa among pillows and blankets, and was not alittle surprised at the doctor's new physiognomy.
"Cousin," said Dona Victorina, "you have got to challenge the alferezimmediately to a duel, or----"
"And why? what for?" asked Linares, surprised.
"You challenge him right off, or I will tell them all who you are."
"But, Dona Victorina!"
The three young women looked at one another.
"The alferez has insulted us. The old witch came down with her whip,and that thing there allowed it all. A man!"
"Pshaw!" said Sinang. "They have been fighting and we haven't seen it."
"The alferez has broken the doctor's teeth," added Victoria.
"This very day we are going to
Manila. You stay here to challengehim to a duel, and, if you don't, I'll tell Don Santiago that allthat you have told him is a lie. I will tell him----"
"But, Dona Victorina! Dona Victorina!" interrupted Linares, paleand going closer to her. "You keep quiet. Don't make me call tomind"----and he added in a low voice--"Don't be imprudent, especiallyjust now."
Just at that time, when this was going on, Captain Tiago arrived homefrom the cock-pit. He was downhearted. He had lost his lasak.
But Dona Victorina did not give him much time to sigh. In a fewwords, and with many insults, she related to him what had passed,she, of course, trying to put herself in a good light.
"Linares is going to challenge him. Do you hear? If he don't, I won'tlet him marry your daughter. Don't you permit it. If he has no courage,he does not merit Clarita."
"Then you are going to marry this gentleman?" asked Sinang, with herjolly eyes full of tears. "I knew that you were discreet, but I didnot think you so fickle."
Maria Clara, pale as wax, raising herself half up, looked at her fatherwith frightened eyes, and then at Dona Victorina and Linares. Thelatter turned red in the face, Captain Tiago looked down, and thesenora added:
"Clarita, bear it in mind, and never marry a man who does not weartrousers. You expose yourself to insults like a dog, if you do."
But the young maiden did not reply and said to her friends:
"Take me to my room, for I cannot go alone."
They helped her to her feet, and, leaning her marble-like head onpretty Sinang's shoulder, and, with the arms of her friend aroundher waist, she went to her bedroom.
That night the doctor and his wife collected their things together,submitted their account to Captain Tiago--which amounted to severalthousand pesos--and very early on the following day, left for Manilain the Captain's carriage. To timid Linares they intrusted the roleof the avenger.