She hadn’t told him she loved him—but had she? Was her love for him over, finished, caput? Just like that? Was she in love with Peter now?
Nausea assaulted him whenever he let his mind drift in that direction. Jack needed a break. A break from seeing Alice almost every day and feeling her less close to him with every passing hour. Ice spent more and more of her free time with her boyfriend and ignored her supposed best friend. In response, Jack’s ego crouched in a dark corner of his mind like a sulky child neglected by his parents.
Mercifully, winter break was approaching fast. There’d be no time for Alice and Peter to be together. The team was flying to Hawaii over Christmas to play three games in Honolulu. No way would Peter behave himself on a trip where they’d be surrounded by hulu beauties 24-7. No. Way.
Fifteen
Alice
Alice and Peter were in the library, heads bent over their respective coursework. It was the weekend before finals week and, for once, Peter didn’t have any games to play or prep for. Not that it helped their dating schedule much. Whatever time could be spared from basketball, Peter had to dedicate to revisions. Hence, their “romantic” library date.
Alice stared at her textbook, trying to take in the complex formulas of molecular orbital theory but not really succeeding. She felt guilty for being here with Peter. She’d always done her last minute revisions with Jack, but lately, they didn’t hang out much outside classes.
Jack had stopped antagonizing her about her relationship with Peter, and she’d stopped asking him about his dates. She didn’t want to know anymore, and he was being uncharacteristically discreet. He hadn’t bragged about a new girl in a while. Not that Alice kidded herself into thinking he had not boasted because he had nothing to boast about. Alice didn’t know if she felt better or worse not knowing exactly what was going on in Jack’s love life. Yet, a new stubbornness compelled her to never ask.
Alice had asked Jack if he wanted to join them for this study session, but he had replied with a curt, “No, thanks!” that had sounded more like “I’d rather walk on broken glass barefooted.”
Peter looked up from his econometrics book and asked, “Are you going home for Christmas?”
“No. Every year my parents go on a cruise for Christmas.” Alice grimaced. “Be away on the 25th and you can get the cheapest fares ever. My family is more about Thanksgiving. I’ll stay here and get a head start on spring term.”
“Alone on Christmas Day?” Peter arched his brows. “That’s sad.”
Alice shrugged. “I’m used to it.”
“Why don’t you come to Hawaii?”
That had been her latest discovery about the Harvard basketball team. The Crimson weren’t free, not even for Christmas. They had to fly to Hawaii to play three games, one of which was on the 25th. Okay, there were worse fates than “having” to go to Hawaii at Christmas time. But still…
“Hawaii?” Alice repeated.
“Yeah, why not?” Peter stared at her expectantly. “We leave on the 21st and we get back on the 26th. I know we have three games, but they usually leave us some chill time in between. My parents can’t make the trip, so it’ll be just the two of us.”
“And the team.” And Jack.
“Yeah, but I can cut some free time, and it’s a week in Maui.” Peter’s enthusiasm was evident. “It’s better than staying here buried under the snow, alone on Christmas Day.”
“Yeah, but you’d be busy most of the time with the team, no?”
“True,” he admitted. “Why don’t you ask your roommates along? You girls could go sunbathing on the beach when I have team duty, and we could hang out the rest of the time.”
Alice considered the possibilities. “Madison has to go home at Christmas for sure. Her family’s a bit overbearing. But I could ask Haley.” Christmas in Hawaii was starting to sound like a real option. “Are you seriously asking me to go to Hawaii with you?”
“Never been more serious.”
Alice chewed her pen. “Can I think about it?”
“What is there to think about?” Peter mimicked hula dancing. “What could be better than flying to a tropical beach with your awesome boyfriend?”
Boyfriend. So far, Alice had thought of their relationship as hanging out or casual dating, but Peter had just made it official.
“I can’t say yes for sure,” Alice conceded. “I have to check flight fares and ask Haley if she can come.”
Alice was stalling to gain some time to decide. The truth was, every year since she’d moved to Boston, her parents had given her a very generous Christmas gift, basically a bribe, to appease the guilt of not spending the day with her. She had saved up the money for the past two years—but maybe, for once, she could stop being super responsible and give herself a break. A Hawaiian break.
Alice was both thrilled and wary of Peter’s proposal. True, sports could be fun to watch. Yet, whenever the team lost—a fifty-fifty chance so far—Peter became sulky and short-tempered. It could be hard to be near him after a lost game. Jack was a tad less moody about it, but basketball wasn’t as important for him.
To be honest, it felt like basketball was the third wheel in her relationship with Peter. It was an all-consuming element in Peter’s life with practice almost every day and several games a week, both at home and in other cities. Before, being Jack’s friend but not taking a real interest in the game, Alice hadn’t noticed how demanding it was.
She had a love-hate relationship with basketball now. Watching Peter play—okay, she kept an eye on Jack too, she couldn’t help it—was exhilarating. It was like dating someone in a band. Whenever you put a man on a stage of sorts, it was guaranteed women would find him instantly more attractive. For Peter, it was exactly like that. On the field, he had a huge spotlight on him that made him irresistible. And he wanted to spend Christmas with her.
Christmas in Hawaii with Peter sounded awesome in theory. But what if the team lost? She’d be in a tropical paradise with her boyfriend and a dark cloud of bad temper over their heads. Not ideal. Also, it wasn’t going to be a cheap or short trip. But if Haley could go, it’d be a fun trip, better than staying in an empty campus during the Christmas holidays. As gorgeous as Harvard was, it wasn’t Hogwarts.
When she thought about it that way, the choice was clear. It was between Hawaii with Peter and possibly one of her best friends—two, counting Jack—or Cambridge alone. Mmm. Last year, Madison had invited her to celebrate with her family. Every year, the Smithsons had this huge Christmas celebration at their country house. It had been such a cheery, fuzzy-warm day. And also the day she’d met Ethan. Madison would invite her again, but Alice couldn’t accept this time; it’d be too awkward. Ethan probably had no desire to have his ex sprinkled on him on Christmas Day. And what if he brought his new girlfriend? Ugh. It’d be a holidays nightmare.
There was no contest. She was going to Hawaii.
***
Alice barged into her apartment barely able to contain her excitement. “Roommates meeting!” she announced.
Haley and Madison were seated at the dining table revising for finals. Madison was studying poetry verses, and Haley code lines. They both lifted their heads, looking grateful for the interruption.
“What’s up?” Haley asked, sagging on the couch.
Madison sat next to Haley, and Alice chose the armchair on the side. “Peter’s invited me to go to Hawaii with him over Christmas,” she said. “The team has to play three games there, and he wants me to go.”
“Hawaii? Wow.” Haley seemed excited.
Alice beamed. “Would you girls like to come with me?”
Madison’s face fell. “I can’t go,” she said at once. “You know how my family is about Christmas and traditions. I can’t skip it.”
Alice had expected that. “Haley?”
“How many days would we be there?”
“Less than a week.”
“I would have to tell my pare
nts I’m not going home for Christmas and ask them for an expense contribution,” Haley said. Then, turning toward Madison, she added, “They’re more flexible about holidays than your parents.”
“Lucky you,” Madison muttered, paling. She gave the impression of swallowing a lump in her throat.
“I’ll check with my parents.” Haley got to her feet and disappeared into her room.
Madison got up as well. “I have some reading to do,” she said, somewhat deflated. She picked up a book and disappeared into her bedroom.
Alice followed her and knocked on her door. “Can I come in?”
“Yes,” came Madison’s muffled voice from within.
Alice opened the door and leaned against the threshold. “I need to ask you a favor.” Alice thought of the first excuse for following Madison. “Can you take care of Blue while I’m gone?”
“Sure, I’ll only be gone for Christmas day.”
“Thanks.” Alice walked into the room. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” Madison said a small voice. “Why?”
“You seem upset about Hawaii.” Alice sat on the bed next to Madison. “What is it?”
“Nothing. I just thought you were coming to my house again for Christmas.” Madison crossed her arms over her chest. “I know I haven’t officially asked you yet, but I thought it was implicit.”
“Yeah, I know, and thank you.” Alice smiled, tight-lipped. “But I can’t come to your house this year.”
“Why?”
“You know why. Ethan will be there. It’d be too awkward for the both of us.”
Madison grimaced and theatrically swatted her forehead with her hand. “You’re right. I’m so stupid. I hadn’t even thought about it.”
“Are you sure there’s nothing else?” Alice insisted. Madison was very private about her feelings—she had to have information like this dragged out of her.
“Like what?”
“Is it about that guy, mmm, what was his name?”
“What guy?”
“Number 23, the one you recognized at the game.”
“Scott? What does he have to do with anything?”
“He’s in your concentration, and I got the impression you had a little crush on him.”
“I don’t,” Madison said, too defensive.
“Haley seemed to like him too,” Alice pressed. “You wouldn’t be worried about something happening between them while we’re in Hawaii, then?”
Madison blushed. “No!”
“Madison, if you like him, just tell Haley he’s off-limits.”
“As if it would matter.” Madison sulked. “If Haley Thomas wants him, she’s going to get him. She doesn’t even try, and all the guys love her. Nothing I say would make a difference. It’s not like he’s my boyfriend or anything. I’ve never said more than ‘hello’ to him.”
“But if you told Haley—”
“No! And promise me you won’t say anything to her about it, ever.”
“Why?”
“Just promise me,” Madison said with an anguished face. “Can you?”
“Okay, I promise.”
Alice had a hunch she’d just made a mistake. Secrets ruined friendships; nothing good could come out of this one.
Haley barged into the room a second later. “Guess what?”
“What?” Madison asked.
“My parents okayed the Hawaiian trip and, as a Christmas present, they’re helping me pay for it.”
“That’s wonderful,” Alice said.
She turned to Madison to study her reaction. Her friend was smiling, but her eyes were sad.
“Come on.” Haley, oblivious as always to most of the things happening around her, grabbed Alice’s hand to pull her up from the bed. “We have to plan our trip.”
Alice stood up and followed Haley out of the room, throwing a dismayed Madison a wistful glance as she closed the door.
Sixteen
Alice
“Hey, Ice,” Jack called, running after her at the end of their last final before winter break.
“Hey.” Alice stopped walking and waited for him. “How did you do?” she asked, referring to their Organic Chemistry test.
“Good, I think.” He frowned. “Except for question two, maybe. Which of the functional groups did you mark as susceptible to nucleophilic attack? A and B, or A, B, and C?”
“Just A and B.”
“Great, me too.” He smiled. “How about you? Any doubts?”
“Question four: the most acidic compound was CH3SH, right?” It had taken her ten minutes to mark that answer. “I always confuse them.”
“Yep, that’s the one.”
Alice let out a relieved breath. “I should be good then.”
“What do you say to a hot chocolate to celebrate? Deal?”
“Deal.”
Jack was in a bright mood for a change. Since she’d started dating Peter, it had been a rare thing, and Alice missed their easygoing interactions. Given the freezing December temperatures, they headed for the nearest place: a cozy coffee shop called Crema Café. Even the short walk outside was enough to turn Alice’s nose and sans-gloves hands red, so she welcomed the puff of warm air that blasted her as she pushed into the coffee shop.
The atmosphere inside, besides being deliciously warm, was also incredibly festive. Red and white Christmas decorations rested on every available surface, and the crowd was loud and cheerful. At four in the afternoon on the last day of finals, pretty much the whole campus was on vacation.
“Grab a table,” Jack said. “I’ll go order. Chocolate with cream?”
“Yeah.” Alice uncoiled her scarf from around her neck. “Medium, please.”
“I’ll be right back.”
Jack scurried off to join the line and Alice couldn’t avoid noting how well his pants fitted him. Bad Alice, she chided herself, no more checking out Jack’s butt. She had a boyfriend, one with a derriere just as good as Jack’s. Alice had to keep drilling it into her head that she and Jack were just friends. And friends didn’t ogle each other’s butts. Definitely not.
The only free table was a tiny one in the back that barely seated two. Alice removed her coat, sat down, and waited for Jack while blowing into her cupped hands to warm them. The hot paper cup Jack handed her five minutes later did a much better job of heating her frozen fingers.
“I’m so glad this semester is over,” Jack announced, plonking down on the chair next to her.
Close. Too close. Despite the place being crowded and the cocoa aroma drifting up from her cup, Alice could still smell Jack’s aftershave. It made her stomach contract a bit, so she flooded it with hot chocolate to force her belly to relax.
“Yeah, me too,” she said. “This one was hard; not that I’ve encountered an easy one yet.” Alice was babbling. They had spent a million afternoons just like this one. There was no reason to be this nervous. “We should put vodka in this.” Alice shook the cup. “It’s so vanilla of us to celebrate with chocolate.”
“I have a game soon,” Jack said matter-of-factly. “Nothing stronger than beer for me.”
Alice felt a stab of annoyance. “I should change best friends. You’re not daring enough.”
Jack’s eyes sparkled. He gave her a look that said, “Try me.” A hot, red flush crept its way up from Alice’s neck to her cheeks. They held each other’s gaze for a second longer before the moment was lost. Jack’s head disappeared under the table as he retrieved something from his bag.
“To overcome my shortcomings in the fun department,” Jack said once his torso was straight again, “I got you something for Christmas.”
Alice stared wide-eyed at the tube-shaped bundle he was holding. “Are we doing presents now?”
They’d never given each other gifts before.
“Nah. It’s really nothing.” Jack shrugged. “I saw it in a shop window the other day and it made me think of you…”
“Can I
open it now, or do I have to wait for Christmas Day?”
Jack flashed her a grin. “Go ahead.”
Alice attacked the wrapping paper. It came off to reveal a cute pink bunny shape.
“What is this?”
“If you remove the case it becomes an umbrella,” Jack said, his voice hesitant.
Alice’s heart stopped. She stared at the pink umbrella covered in tiny white dots, unable to lift her gaze to meet Jack’s eye.
“I know it’s silly,” Jack continued. He sounded just as nervous. “But do you remember that night—”
Alice lifted her gaze and locked eyes with Jack. “Of course I remember…”
***
It was a stormy spring night, with rain pouring from the sky by the bucket. Jack and Alice were waiting for Jack’s girlfriend to come out of the pub where they’d all had dinner. The atmosphere inside the pub had been humid and suffocating. So much so that when the girlfriend—whatever her name was—had needed to use the restroom, Alice and Jack had preferred to wait outside in spite of the rain. Since that first awful dinner with Olivia, it had become routine for Jack to bring his dates along from time to time when he and Alice went out together.
They took shelter under the pub’s ledge, Jack standing in front of her near the door. After a couple of minutes, the door was pushed open, forcing Jack to squeeze her between his chest and the pub wall to keep out of the downpour. Too close. With her back to the wall and Jack looming over her, Alice’s skin prickled. Embarrassed, she shifted to the side, keeping under the ledge, making it look as if they weren’t together. A bulky guy with a black umbrella came out of the pub. He did a quick scan of the road and focused his attention on Alice.
“Hey, you,” bulky guy said. “Bad night to go home without an umbrella. Want a spot under mine?”
Before Alice could do or say anything, he grabbed Alice by the waist, pulling her close to him. His breath reeked of onion rings and beer. It made Alice gag.