Despite Mar'li's lively humor, there was an undertone of sadness to the meal that Va'del could only guess resulted from Piter and Bay'del's death. Va'del felt more than a little ashamed that he'd been so busy worrying about what the news meant to him that he'd never stopped to think about the fact that Javin and the others had actually known Piter and Bay'del.
As everyone started in on a rare dessert of grain and gurra milk that was one of the two dishes that Mar'li had prepared in their rooms rather than collecting from the communal kitchens, On'li looked over to Javin, who nodded as if to say it was past time.
"Va'del, I promised you that we'd do what we could to see you sponsored as a candidate. We haven't managed a full sponsorship yet, but the Council has finally agreed to allow you to take classes with the candidates."
Va'del felt as though he'd been struck, and it wasn't until he looked over and saw Jain's equally amazed expression that he decided he must have really heard the Guadel correctly.
On'li held up her hands in warning before her guests could respond. "This is a very small victory for us, one that costs the Council nothing to grant and which can be revoked at any time. You are not a candidate and may never be granted full candidate status."
Va'del felt his face fall, but once On'li seemed sure she'd delivered a healthy enough dose of reality, she seemed content to shore him back up a little. "On the other hand, I have every confidence that you'll exert yourself to the greatest extent possible, and that you'll soon be the star pupil in all of your classes. That should go a long way to convincing certain members of the Council that you should be permitted to stay and even someday allowed to take your final vows as a Guadel."
There was no question as Va'del returned to his rooms that he was happy about the fact that he was one tiny step closer to becoming a Guadel, but he was surprised by just how happy he was.
He still didn't understand why On'li and the others hadn't done more for him sooner than they had, but he was more and more convinced that they really did want to help him out. He wouldn't mistake them for family, or even friends, but he was happier than he'd been at any point since I'rone, Jasmin and Betreec had been killed.
Chapter 16
Va'del dropped back into a crouch as his shorter opponent edged towards him. He usually rushes me. Half the time he gets me before I can take him down. Of course, the other half I make him look like a complete idiot. Fi'lin is serious when he tells Bi'li not to take wild gambles. Time to show him it's stupid to risk your life on a fifty-fifty chance.
Bi'li did indeed rush, but his weight shifted a little too far to the right, telegraphing what he was going to do. Va'del slid just far enough to the left to avoid the attack while simultaneously landing a blow that would have taken Bi'li's arms off at the elbow.
Even Alir wouldn't have been able to ignore such on obvious strike, and Fi'lin immediately ruled that Bi'li was disabled.
Va'del wasn't tired yet, not with the additional muscle he'd put on. Of course, the fact that Fi'lin didn't throw opponent after opponent at him until sheer exhaustion caused him to lose bouts helped too. Regardless, the teenager stretched quickly to try and keep himself loose. He didn't want tension to rob him of energy he'd need later.
After verbally flaying Bi'li for the better part of five minutes, the whip-thin Guadel looked Va'del over for a second with an odd gleam in his eye before turning and calling out Se'ath's name. As quickly as that, Va'del felt his stomach drop.
Se'ath is Be'ter's best friend. His teasing is even more vicious than most.
As if the Goddess was looking down and had decided that Va'del's impending humiliation wasn't nearly severe enough, the sudden sound of footsteps and giggling signaled the arrival of Jain and the rest of the Goddess-touched Daughters.
Fi'lin has always been fair before this, why is he trying to humiliate me now?
There was no time to consider the question further as Fi'lin called the two boys together and instructed them. "It will be Ba'tier rules for the two of you and I'll have the ears of the boy who permanently damages the other or breaks any bones. You hear me?"
Se'ath and Va'del both nodded their understanding and then backed away and put their practice helms on.
Va'del tried to focus, but it was hard. Ba'tier rules didn't allow the match to end until one opponent had conclusively demonstrated his superiority over the other. If Va'del wasn't able to hold Se'ath off, then the other boy would have the chance to hit him again and again until Fi'lin finally declared the winner.
He really does want me humiliated.
The two boys bowed to each other and then clashed in a whirl of arms that only the most skilled could have differentiated from the battles of the full guardsmen fighting on the other side of the cavern.
Va'del had gotten so used to seeing Se'ath triumph over all but the best fighters among the candidates that he was more than a little surprised when the blond boy didn't disarm him in the first pass.
He's strong, but not stronger than me. Seems to rely on his sword too much, just like Be'ter.
For the next pass, Va'del tested his theory and was rewarded with a near touch when the older boy's dagger almost wasn't in place quickly enough to block a blow that would have been fatal in a real fight.
By the third pass Va'del had completely lost any fear of Se'ath and instead started pressing the boy as hard as he could across the rough floor of the cavern. The gathering crowd of observers seemed to drop away and fade from focus, leaving only the match.
Se'ath was good, and he was obviously doing his best to connect with his attacks, but for every one he landed, Va'del scored twice.
An attack that Va'del recognized at the last second as the fourth movement from the third form nearly gained Se'ath another touch, but was executed poorly enough that it left him open to a basic slashing attack. Va'del pulled the blow, but he knew it would leave a nasty bruise on the face that nearly a quarter of the girls sighed over every night before they went to sleep.
Another handful of minutes passed before Va'del sensed an almost imperceptible shift in the tempo of the fight. Acting as much on instinct as anything else, he pressed Se'ath even harder and found that the other boy was almost completely on the defensive.
He's tiring.
Thoughts of winning were now secondary to the need to defeat Se'ath in such a way that he'd be too ashamed to harass Va'del in the future, and the younger boy found that his blows were landing again and again with just a hair less than bone-breaking force.
Se'ath dropped his weapons and turned to run, and only Fi'lin's sudden roar stopped Va'del from pursuing.
Almost as if awaking from a dream, Va'del came back to himself and realized that he was dripping sweat, tired and bruised in more places than he could count.
Fi'lin sent one of the guardsman after Se'ath to verify that the boy wasn't seriously injured, and then turned back to Va'del.
He's going to reprimand me for using too much force. For attacking too aggressively, for almost chasing a retreating training partner.
The triumph and glee that Va'del had been feeling seconds before faded away to be replaced by guilt over how close he'd come to really hurting Se'ath.
Fi'lin studied Va'del for several long seconds with dark eyes that didn't give away even the slightest clue to the thoughts behind them. "Are you okay?"
Va'del found that he wasn't able to speak, and nodded cautiously.
"You both came very close to seriously hurting each other, but I think he's relatively undamaged, so I won't have to take your ears after all."
The Guadel leaned in close with a stern look on his face. "I don't think you'll have to worry about him hassling you anymore, but don't get a taste for humiliating your fellow students or you'll end up facing me across the ring and I'll give you a lesson you won't be forgetting."
Was I just chastised or commended?
Va'del couldn't be sure, but he was starting to suspect that he had a nominal ally in the arms master. The teenager turned to
look for Jain, only to feel hurt and confused at her brief wave. When he turned back after racking his weapons, she was gone.
##
By the time the messenger finished his tale it was so quiet in the Council chamber that On'li wasn't sure that anyone was even breathing.
A few weeks ago the message that one of the Guadel had been struck down would have brought shouts and recriminations echoing off of the ornately-carved walls, but now there was just a tired resignation to the fact that the Council had already done all that they could in the face of this new threat.
A'vril was the first to speak and seemed mostly interested in clarifying one last point. "So the guardsmen we sent with Guadel Gia'to and his family were also dead? The corpses were left where they fell, only those of the Guadel showing signs of having been looted?"
The messenger nodded and then bowed his head respectfully as he was dismissed.
Per'ce said what most of the Councilors were thinking. "They were after the glow and heat stones that they were carrying, but why?"
On'li shrugged. "We have no real contact with any lowlander mages, a decision that I wholeheartedly agree with, but one that means we don't know what they are really capable of. Possibly those worked gemstones represent items of value great enough to justify undertaking these attacks. Replacing the worked stones we've lost in the last two attacks will take decades and for all we know the lowlander mages no longer have the secret of their manufacture. If so, even a single stone would be of incalculable value."
Even Ja'dir seemed subdued by the knowledge that another of their number had fallen. Then again, this time it was from one of the two bloodlines currently allied with him, so maybe he's thinking more of the fact that it might make it harder to keep someone in line than that someone we all knew, at least a little, is now dead.
"Let's not jump to any conclusions yet. Yes, the worked stones are missing, but the Guadel were obviously the leaders of the group—it is only reasonable that they would be searched for valuables. It is entirely possible that these attacks are still motivated primarily by the desire to weaken the People in preparation for some kind of invasion."
Per'ce didn't look like he wanted to agree with Ja'dir, but he nodded, sending his perfectly-arranged hair swaying. "There is still the rise in bag'lig activity to consider."
Ja'dir jumped on the idea like someone running from an avalanche. "Exactly—the bag'ligs are likely being driven up the mountains by the same people who are attacking our patrols. If we can tie all these pieces together we'll know who to go after down in the lowlands to make sure that all of these problems stop."
On'li didn't like the way Ja'dir was acting, but she was even more disturbed by the fact that none of the rest of them had thought to approach the problem from the standpoint of seeing which lowlanders had an interest in causing the People problems.
Apparently the rest of the Council felt the same way, and it took less than a quarter cycle for a motion to be made and seconded that a group be sent down to the lowlands in an effort to determine what was going on.
Shortly thereafter, the Council session was adjourned and On'li and Javin returned to their rooms where Mar'li had lunch waiting for them. It wasn't until On'li was on her second cup of tea that she finally managed to push her worries about Ja'dir out of her mind so she could focus on the items that would be covered in the next meeting.
##
Jain felt bad about snubbing Va'del, especially knowing what he'd been through in the last few months, but she kept telling herself that she had a right to be angry.
I can't believe he forgot my birthday. I told him about it weeks ago before Piter and Bay'del were even killed. He's had plenty of time to come up with something, but he didn't do a single thing for me yesterday. He didn't even say anything last night when I snuck away to see him.
Some of the Daughters had already mastered the ability to work magic while angry or in the grip of other powerful emotions, but Jain wasn't one of them. Instead, she generally found that if she was anything other than completely calm she couldn't conjure anything more complex than a simple ball of light.
For all that Jain wasn't one of the more powerful students, she had always dedicated herself to her studies and learned new things quickly. It wasn't a surprise when Guadel Bell quickly realized that there had to be something wrong for Jain to be fumbling the basic working they were practicing today.
"Come now, Jain, this isn't at all like you. What is the problem?"
Jain looked around at the other girls, unsure of whether or not she wanted to say anything where they could overhear. More than one of the Daughters was jealous of the amount of attention Jain's attractive features and uncommon blond hair brought from the candidates.
Luckily, Mistress Bell caught the look and gently pulled her to her feet. "Come now. I think we need to talk in my office."
The Guadel's 'office' was little more than a storage closet with a cloth door, but by long-standing tradition once it was occupied she worked a complex bit of magic that stopped sound from passing out of it, thereby guaranteeing that anything discussed inside would stay confidential.
Jain felt more than a little foolish now that she was sitting across from Guadel Bell, but the older woman smiled at her. "Now, now, don't go having second thoughts on me, the magic's already done."
When Jain didn't immediately respond Guadel Bell smiled once again, an expression that lit up her hazel eyes. "You know my policy, you all have to feel like you can ask me questions. If not you'd probably all end up killing yourselves and each other with magic gone awry. How can I expect you to ask the big questions that will save all of our lives if I'm not willing to discuss the smaller things?"
Mistress Bell had a reputation as the most approachable of all the Guadel, and watching her patiently await an answer, Jain decided she really could trust the older woman.
Almost before she knew what she was doing, Jain spilled the entire story to her instructor, everything except the fact that it was Va'del she was mad at.
Bell nodded once her student was done. "Did you have a good birthday other than that?"
Jain nodded, smiling a little. "All of my friends remembered—everyone but him."
"All of your girl friends remembered yes, but what about the other candidates?"
Jain had to think for a second before shaking her head. "No, a couple of them did, but not all."
"Child, I'm going to let you in on a little secret. It's the result of all my years of experience as a wife, and though it seems the simplest thing in the world I think it accounts for more of our heartache than most of us would believe. Men and women are different."
Jain felt her eyes go big as she tried to reconcile the statement with the teachings of all her other instructors who routinely said that women and men were equal.
"Notice I said different. I didn't get into one being better than the other, because I don't think that's the case, but they are different. In some things the difference is minimal, in others it's like snow and bare rock."
The Guadel didn't give her student a chance to interrupt. "Women never forget, but the Goddess made them capable of forgiving. Men, on the other hand, almost never forgive, but are blessed to be able to forget."
"That's stupid, why would she make them forget instead of being able to forgive like we can?"
Mistress Bell smiled again. "To us, of course, our way of being seems superior, but I think that there are reasons for the differences."
Jain shook her head in confusion. "I don't understand the purpose to something like that."
The Guadel looked away for a second, and there was pain on her face when she turned to Jain again. "Sometimes duty requires that terrible things be done to ensure that worse things don't take place. Forgetting in those instances, even if the forgetting takes years, can sometimes be easier than trying to forgive yourself when the memories of the hurt you've caused are always fresh and vivid."
Jain slowly nodded. "I suppose also that there
are things that shouldn't be forgiven, and a man could lend strength there where we otherwise might forgive those unworthy."
Mistress Bell squeezed Jain's hand. "That is right, but without the forgetting, they'd carry around every little slight we'd ever done them, never able to let them go. Always remember, my child. Men are different, but it's a difference that lends them strength just as our difference from them lends us strength. Try not to be too hard on your young man; his forgetfulness stems, at least in part, from how he is made, and not solely from neglect, like you might otherwise think."
##
Va'del knew it was dangerous to pace in the darkness, but he couldn't quite stop himself. It was a compulsion, like fingering the two partially-worked gemstones that were his only legacy from I'rone's family.
I wish Jasmin was here. She was female, but she was easy to talk to. I could have asked her what I did to make Jain mad.
The teenager had long since lost count of the number of laps he'd made around the cavern, one hand on the rough wall, the other at the pouch hanging from his neck, when the soft sound of footsteps finally heralded Jain's arrival.
Va'del rushed to apologize before Jain could say anything. "Powers, I'm so sorry for whatever I did wrong. I didn't mean to make you mad."
Jain remained silent for a second, and then suddenly there was a softly-glowing ball of light in the center of the cave. In the light, Va'del could see tears that matched his own sliding down Jain's cheeks.
"No, I'm the one who should be sorry. I shouldn't have let something so little bother me. I was worried that you wouldn't be here tonight, that you'd decide that I wasn't worth the headache of trying to keep happy."
Va'del reached out and pulled Jain into a hug, amazed by the fact that her thoughts had so exactly mirrored his own. "No, never. I was worried that you'd feel that way about me though. What did I do?"
"Yesterday was my birthday."
Va'del felt his heart skip a beat. Powers, she did say something about it being in the fourth month, I just forgot about it. I don't even know today's date. I'll have to find out from someone else so I can write down her birthday and not forget next year. I don't even have anything to give her.