Chapter 35
Even with a lightweight shield Augni had trouble matching Aemere's movements. Thankfully her practice sword was also lighter than normal. On impact anyway, which was his experience of it. The balance was the same.
She swayed easily with every move, her feet gliding between stances with precision. There were no sharp movements, each flowing from the last in a complex dance. Her opponents spoilt that illusion with their clumsiness, him included.
Her opponent for the final qualifying bout had a strengthened shield which had been greatly lightened. He quickly blocked every blow, wearing his opponents down. So they practiced ways to get around the shield, which would be easier if Augni could see him in combat. Attempts to spy on his training had failed.
He'd done his best to approximate the opponent's fighting style from what they knew. He didn’t know how much use it was, or whether she'd be better training alone.
If that were the case, she'd tell him. While they occasionally got distracted, she was focussed when sparring. This was her current goal in life, and nothing would distract her from it for long.
That was fine by him. They'd developed a comfortable routine – focussed on the Tournament – and he had no problem with it. Other than when he compared it to his time with Thjorn. Those memories could be dispersed by recalling their final encounter, even if he felt he might have been harsh.
Many of his recent thoughts focussed on the distant past. He tried remembering why he'd joined Thjorn. It had seemed so obvious at the time.
Despite politics seeing him thrown out of the guards, he'd still believed in justice. That there was right and wrong. A right and wrong not defined in economic terms. Had that been naive? If so, it was an affliction he still suffered.
Or did he? A lot of what he'd done with Thjorn had been crimes. He'd accepted Aemere's reluctance to take part. That she saw them as crimes. Yet he didn't view them that way himself. Crime wasn't really a matter of perspective, so if he accepted her defining them as such, didn't that mean he accepted they were crimes? How could he believe in justice while knowingly committing crimes?
The simple answer was that he was deluding himself. Or letting himself be deluded. Even if the guilds had subverted laws, did that mean they were no longer laws? Or that an action against them wasn't illegal?
He saw them as having usurped legal power, so acting against them was justified. He'd never killed or harmed individuals, focussing on the organisations. Was that simply an excuse? Was he looking for revenge rather than justice?
At heart he couldn't be sure how much of what he believed was due to Thjorn manipulating him, or manipulating his feelings about the guilds.
More than that, he wondered whether he'd manipulated Aemere in the same way. He'd played on her feelings towards them to get her to join. Had he manipulated her? The fact he couldn't tell was the worrying part. Had he lost all sense of right and wrong?
No matter how often he went through it, he found no answers, only more questions.
He shoved the thoughts down as they moved through a series of blocks she had trouble with. So far all she could do against them was retreat and wait it out, which wasn't useful.
There didn't seem to be much challenge in the fight. Her opponent had lost one fight, so wouldn't have the same drive to win. That – and her growing notoriety – meant the odds were in her favour, which made betting on her less profitable. They should still be able to make it to Volthus on what they had.
He didn't want to go near any of his caches until the heat had a chance to die down, so they had to rely on her money. Fortunately the finalists would be provided lodgings in Volthus – often in short supply during the finals – and they should have enough to travel there. He might have to venture into what wilderness Volthus possessed to hunt for food, but they should see the time through. And then...
He didn't know what they'd do then. He doubted she did, either. He avoided dwelling on that, since it only took him back to that lost place.
The calm of their sparring was shattered by an unexpected voice.
'The shield’s new, he still overcompensates. You can use that to throw him off balance.'
They froze in mid-move, and Aemere's eyes flashed irritation as she stood to regard the watcher. Augni was slower, composing his features before facing Thjorn.
'What do you want?' asked Augni, his tone clipped and precise.
The lack of an immediate response was disconcerting, mitigated slightly by Thjorn’s apparent effort at suppressing his instinctive reply. He seemed to have trouble speaking. 'I'm sorry,' he said at last.
It took Augni a moment to be sure he'd heard what he thought he'd heard. Which he couldn't have. 'Sorry for...?' he prompted.
Thjorn opened his mouth, then closed it again as he groped for an answer. 'For whatever I did that...'
'Whatever being...?' asked Augni, half bemused and sure he was dreaming.
Thjorn shrugged in frustration. 'For being me. Will that cover it?'
'Not really,' said Augni. His amusement evaporated. Was Thjorn keeping the mask up because Aemere was present? 'Do you not even understand why I was angry?'
'I understand the triggers. My releasing the prisoners, which resulted in some guards being killed. I'm just not sure of the underlying source of the problem it brought up. Dissatisfaction with my methods, possibly.'
Augni stared at him, before meeting Aemere's calmly bemused face.
That had probably been as close to a real answer as Thjorn had offered in a while. Augni hadn’t realised until then how much the masks had taken over. Even the easy camaraderie between them had evolved into something of a mask, and the real Thjorn had retired behind these shields to direct his campaign.
Augni wasn’t sure he still cared who was behind there. 'What do you want?'
'To see whether you're ready to return to work,' said Thjorn, his mask of confidence restored.
'I beg your pardon?'
Thjorn forced contrition back into his voice. 'To see whether you'll come back to assisting me with my plan?'
'I have a job,' said Augni.
'And I have no interest in working for you again,' said Aemere.
'Fortunately, only one of those statements is a concern,' said Thjorn.
'Not the way to get me to come back,' said Augni.
'I'm... sorry.' The word seemed no easier for him the second time. Quite possibly the second time he'd ever spoken it. 'Habit.'
'Regardless, I'm busy,' said Augni.
'Because she really needs your sparring to help prepare, no I'm sorry.' Despite his distaste with the word it seemed to be coming easier.
Augni resisted an immediate retort, having none. She could probably do as well without him. The truth was he didn't want to leave her.
'Why would I possibly want to work with you again?' asked Augni.
'Why did you before?' asked Thjorn.
That caught him off guard. He resisted the impulse to confront Thjorn over whether he'd been manipulated into it. He still couldn't tell. All he could offer was an honest answer, if not necessarily a true one. 'Because I wanted to get back at the Alliance, and you seemed to offer the only possibility of that.'
'Don't I still?'
'What have you done to strike at them?' asked Aemere. 'Have any of your plans ever achieved anything?'
'Certainly.'
'Name one thing,' she said.
'Not the kind of things you'd know about,' said Thjorn.
'That's convenient,' said Aemere.
'We achieved things,' said Augni. 'Looking back I'm not sure what effect most had other than irritating them. And I'm not sure I still want to get back at them.'
'We achieved a lot,' said Thjorn.
'So you say,' said Augni. 'Occasionally you even explained the larger impact of what we were doing. I believed it at the time, that we were achieving something substantial. Now I have to wonder. How much were you holding back?'
'Only what I had to,' said Thjorn.
'Why did you have to hold back anything? I thought you trusted me.'
'I did. I do. But I didn’t fully trust what I thought was happening. There’d always been a pattern behind the scenes, just out of reach, since before you were with me. Since before you were against me even. It took a while to piece together, prodding here and there with our jobs to see what reactions we got.'
'And you didn’t tell me about this?' said Augni. His temper was in danger of getting the better of him. It wasn’t exactly manipulation, but the thought he’d been kept in the dark wasn’t amusing.
'Initially I didn’t trust you.'
'And then? When you did? Or did you ever trust me?'
'Of course I trust you.' Thjorn grew briefly irritated, the masks dropping away. 'You’re the only one I have for a long time. But if I’d told you what I suspected you’d have thought I was insane and left, and I... I wanted to be sure I was right before telling you.'
'And are you sure yet? Or is there more?'
'No, I... I know what’s behind it all.'
'Behind all of what?' asked Augni.
'The Society, the Alliance,' said Thjorn. 'I know who really rules everything. What if I tell you the truth behind all of this? Will that be enough for you to come back?'
Glancing at Aemere, Augni found her indifferent. She shrugged at his implied question. He couldn't dismiss his curiosity, and wouldn't commit to anything without at least discussing it with her. But the offer was too good to pass up.
'It'll be a start.'