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"No way guys! I'm retired!” Bates paced around the expansive sunroom in agitation, while Milo, after he had finished licking Oscar's big hairy face, tried to sleep on the biologist’s lap, and Mel casually inspected the toddler twins, Mike and Sara.
Oscar and Mel had discovered Bates and Milo soundly sleeping on a comfortable lounge chair when they arrived at his home in Scotland to visit him. The pair weren't surprised that their friend appeared to have gained more weight and lost some muscle since the last time they saw him; since the Dannos adventure Bates was slowly reverting to his natural couch-potato form.
"Tell that to President Wright!” responded Oscomb. "This isn't our idea. We were getting along just fine studying The Land and its inhabitants, with Elizabeth's help. And by the way, that young lady of yours has been invaluable. She's got some pretty mean psy powers of her own that have been helpful, and instincts and intelligence to boot. But even more, she's a damn dynamo! She spends a lot of time with her husband Dooley, of course, but that can't be helped.”
"Frankly, she has pretty much taken charge of our efforts, Bates," admitted Mel. "She has an amazing affinity for understanding the strange new types of life that we are trying to study. She's a chip off the old block I suppose, a born scientist and leader.”
Bates smiled.
"Yes, she does certainly take after her mother," continued Mel. "Of course that suits us just fine. But to get back to the point: some weird and dangerous stuff has been happening Earth-wide! After reviewing the evidence, we agree that you're needed, Bates."
"And that's not just human opinion, Bates," said Oscar. "The unicorns have been scouting some of this out, and they seem to think that something dreadful is afoot that could use your help. They’ve been encountering some pretty weird and dangerous life-forces that have been set lose by the awakening of the Dragon, but they think that there's even more to it than that. It's not random anymore. Patterns are becoming evident: strange beasts running off with folks, Earth tremors, weird weather and the like. Things are getting all stirred up again."
Bates nodded. "Baldor showed up here a week ago and pretty much told me the same thing. But I feel that whatever is happening, the unicorns can handle it, including weird beasts. And weather has always been weird."
"Not normally as weird as tornadoes that call out obscenities and pelt folks with toads and snakes," responded Mel. "But the monster attacks are the most worrisome aspect. It's setting lots of humans against the People."
"I can't believe that the People would be behind it," said Bates.
"Of course not," agreed Oscar. "In fact, the People are being attacked too. Even the unicorns themselves!”
The conversation was interrupted by Janet, who ushered in a surprise guest into the sunroom and then disappeared again. She was giving her husband time to be alone with his friends.
"Mr. Jigs!” exclaimed Bates, as he, Mel, Oscar, and Milo warmly greeted the old billionaire. "This is an unexpected pleasure!”
"Not really, Narbando," said Ray Dave Jigs, smiling, but shaking his head negatively to indicate that all was not well. "You should know by now that seeing me isn't necessarily the best thing that can happen to you. Actually, I'm here to warn you to watch your step. Dangerous times are coming!”
"Wait a minute!” protested Bates, as he ushered the old billionaire onto a comfortable chair and then plopped himself down on his own trusty old recliner. "I thought this Ra business was mostly over with. Steve has sent word that the Galactic League is really fixing their wagon."
"As a danger to the galaxy the Ra are just getting started actually, but that's just a superficial plot line, Bates. You have worries much closer to home; you have to look at the deeper plot."
"Look at what plot? Your Government Men novel's been out of print for years, if it ever was in print at all, but I saw the VISICOM adaptation of it, and what we've already done is all there is to it. The Earth gets saved from Dannos and then we all live happily-ever-after. The End. Well, this is the happily-ever-after part!”
"You can't go by a sleazy COM script, Bates," admonished Mel. "They're more into melodrama and special effects than historical fact. Besides, they always cut out all the good parts to fit in the commercials!”
"That last mini-series about the Dannos affair wasn't half bad. I thought they finally picked the right guy to play me," retorted Bates.
Oscar and Mel broke out into laughter. "Yeah right! Of course an actor famous for his James Bond roles is just perfect to play you!” said Oscar.
"The point is that it's not all over," said Jigs. "You need to re-read the Government Men epilogue. A sequel to that novel is emerging. Though of course as usual I can't tell you the details about what's going to happen, you're soon going to be heading back towards Uncle Jake's old stomping ground and using what people now call the Nexus Portal. Or perhaps you will go to Goth Mountain instead. Or perhaps both. That part is unclear to my farsight. That also assumes that you will be able to go anywhere, of course. You might not live that long."
"Now wait just a minute!” objected Bates. "Before you start spouting riddles and nonsense about why you can't tell me more, I don't want to hear any of it! Haven't I done my share? Haven't we all? Right now I just want to live a normal life with my wife and kids. Hell, I don't even want to go back to Maryland, let along travel through some sort of space-time warp to other universes! I'm retired! Whatever game is afoot, I refuse to play."
"Nope,” retorted Jigs. “Sorry, Bates, but your tenure as a Guardian has just started and you're stuck with it. Yes, you did carry through with that Dannos business, but that's just a small piece of it; I’m afraid that there are plenty more challenges to come!”
Bates shook his head in disagreement. "I don't see it that way. The DOD is making a strong come-back, and Latanna is giving the Galactic League police force teeth to handle the Ra. And here on Earth there are millions of folks with strong psy powers now, and thousands of friendly unicorns with more powers than I will ever have. Regardless of what's happening, I'm redundant. I figure that I can stay here in Scotland for the rest of my life, and hardly anyone will even notice."
Jigs was shaking his head. "Wrong again! You're unique in your powers; you just haven't discovered them all yet. You've been too busy sitting on your butt here eating pizza. And I wouldn't count on the Galactic League for help; they're soon going to need help themselves! As to the importance of your role in all this, didn't you ever watch It's a Wonderful Life, where the angel shows Jimmy Stewart how lousy everything would be if he was never born? You can't just wimp out on the world and expect someone else to take up all your slack."
"I can try!”
"Your President doesn't agree!”
"I quit the Civil Service over two years ago; I'm not a Government man anymore. I didn't even vote last time, not even by absentee ballot."
The old man shook his head. “I'm afraid that you're doing to be dragged into what's coming. We all are. I'm just here to warn you to keep on your toes, that's all. I’ve got other places to go and things to do, so saving Earth is mostly up to you and yours, Guardian Bates."
"Fudge Winkies!” exclaimed Bates.
"That's just the way it is."
"But why me? And don't tell me that you have no control over events, Jigs, there were just too many coincidences in our recent Dannos adventure. Such as me suddenly heading things up in DOD, while at the same time the woman I happened to fall in love with years earlier just happened to discover the Dannos problem. And then there were your advance preparations for us in Enterprise City and around the world!”
"Truth be known, that's just the tip of the iceberg, Bates. There's a list of things like that a mile long. Such as Jake and Hank being related. Such as the fact that I've been subsidizing a certain observatory and university in Arizona by millions of dollars each year. Also, there was the matter of your friend Gus encountering Fen at Mt. Rainier and preparing Pru to work with you humans. Now, that one really
took some doing; Gus actually rather liked his retirement in Florida, you know."
"Do you mean Gus would still be alive in Florida if it wasn't for you?" asked Bates in sudden anger.
"No, actually he could have died in a car accident in Florida years earlier, and Mel could have died in Guatemala instead of Gus," responded Jigs. "So yes, I confess! Shall we just say I tweaked the plot until there was greater hope that it might work out reasonably well and the Earth would be saved? It was my life's work, though a work far from perfection. But it's not over yet, not by a long shot! What’s ahead is a lot worse than we’ve been through so far. Frankly, I don’t know enough about it to give you advice the way that I did for the Dannos business, so you’re basically on your own this time."
"That's all that you've seen with your gift? What do you call it? Farsight?"
"Farsight is as good a name for it as I've found. Frankly, so much happens so soon that I can’t figure it out. I’ve seen bits and pieces of several possible futures, and I simply can’t put it all together. It’s a bloody mess though, I can tell you that much. Your life as a Guardian has only begun, and other members of your family will be greatly involved too."
"Not if I can help it! I don't care about your visions, or dragon dreams, or goofy novels! My wife and kids are going to lead perfectly normal lives. As you've explained it, your farsight only sees things as they might become. Well, you're barking up the wrong tree this time! I'm living life in the slow lane here, and that's the way I like it. There will be no more strange adventures for me or for my family!
"Sure, I remember my Guardian pledge, and if anything cosmically nasty does pop up, I'll live up to that pledge, though without involving Janet and the kids. But I’m certainly not going to go off looking for trouble. Right now it seems to me that there's just a lot of confusion resulting from everyone adapting to psychic powers and entering the Galactic League. In time that should sort itself out, and then people can take it easy for a while, like I’m doing. You're looking at a simple ordinary human being and his simple ordinary family, who all lead simple, ordinary lives. End of story."
Jigs laughed. "You aren't the one writing the stories Bates. Anyway, watch your step and good luck to you all." With that the multi-billionaire departed, leaving Bates, Mel, Oscar, Milo and the twins to consider his dire warning.
"Yow! Bates! What's that?" shouted Mel, as he scooted hastily away from an outside window through which a horse-sized reptilian head was emerging on a long thick neck.
"Oh. That's just one of those darned 'nessie' things; the lake's full of them. Pests, if you ask me. I don't know why this lake's so popular, with those things around all the time. They seem to have taken a liking to the kids. This one keeps visiting Mike, and there's another one out there someplace that can't seem to get enough of Sara."
Mike, who had been quietly been crawling around in his crib and making faces at the visitors, giggled with glee, flew out of the crib and over to the big 'nessie', and poked it playfully on the snout, as Mel and Oscar watched fearfully. The creature was certainly big enough to gulp down a child with no problem at all.
Bates however, seemed unconcerned, as did his dog Milo, who was still trying to take a nap on Oscomb's big lap.
Oscar and Mel looked at each other in astonishment. The established norm was for kids to develop their psy powers between the ages of six and thirteen. They had never heard of a flying toddler. Nor had they ever heard that Loch Ness 'monsters' were actually real!
"Aren't kids a handful?" complained Bates, as he still relaxed calmly in his recliner, watching the nessie give Mike a ponderous but gentle return poke. "They smell like dead fish though, don't they? The nessies I mean, not so much the kids. Worse than my damned goldfish tanks ever were! Mike! Send it away! It can come back and play later, after my friends have left."
Little Mike, though not yet two years old, appeared to fully understand his father. The child shot Bates a sour look and then gave the huge nessie creature another pat on the snout, and the huge head and neck slowly withdrew. Through the window, the visitors saw a gigantic, whale-sized, rounded body with thick tail drag itself ponderously towards the nearby lake using what seemed to be a cross between feet and flippers. There was a tremendous splash and some ripples in the water, then it was gone.
Mike flew back to the crib, and sulked there with his sister Sara.
"Anyway, as I was saying gentlemen," continued Bates, "all you have is unsubstantiated rumor and public hysteria, while what I have here in Scotland is simple, normal, safe, and ordinary. Dull even. No surprises; and I don't expect any. As far as I can tell, everything is right with the world, and I like it that way."
As Bates was talking, his astonished visitors watched the two twins behind him in the crib. They were simply sitting there together staring at their Dad and smiling, but from the way they were doing it the onlookers all sensed that the little beggars were up to something. Suddenly a huge glass pitcher full of what looked like water came floating through the wall behind the twins, sailed over them, and stopped directly above Bates' head.
Bates kept talking, but everyone else lost track of what he was saying, as the pitcher suddenly dumped its water! Instead of landing on the man's head however, the water split into a dozen or more streams that shot off into different directions all over the room. Now it was the twins as well as the visitors that watched in fascination as the water furiously twisted and turned like agitated snakes through the air all around the room, before returning to the now upright pitcher. Pitcher and water shot swiftly out through the back wall again and were gone!
Bates sat up smiling and turned to face his two beloved little munchkins. "You'll have to do better than that, you little stinkers," he laughed. He held out his two arms and Mike and Sara, grinning, flew across the room to him for a big hug. Whether they flew by his powers or theirs, it was impossible for the onlookers to tell. Bates relaxed in his recliner with the happy twins sitting on his lap. Milo left Oscomb and hopped up onto Bates' recliner and Bates also, and began licking the trio, as the giggling twins pulled and poked at their proud father, Milo, and one another, while Bates once again reiterated his position.
"Janet has ordered pizza and drinks for us all, my friends, so just relax now and prepare to stuff yourselves silly. Fudge Winkies, you guys worry too much! From now on, life is going to be a snap! What could possibly go wrong?"
The End?
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About the Author and Other Publications
Born in Erie PA and currently residing in Southern Maryland, I am a recently retired engineer with degrees in physics. I took up writing as a hobby over two decades ago, for no practical reasons that I can think of.
My first published novel is Blue Dawn Jay of Aves, a traditional science fiction story of a distant planet inhabited by giant song-loving sentient birds that is being colonized by humans. It was written in response to my appreciation for birds, birders, music, and song, and my desire to write something purely science fiction and off-Earth. In honor of my wonderful wife and daughters, I created a strong woman heroine to team up with Blue Dawn the jay.
For a fun quirky tale about a private detective dealing with ultimate shrinkage, elves and other nasty visitors from a parallel dimension, and with the mob and a talking mob-cat, read the noir-tinged fantasy/detective novel The Shrinking Nuts Case.
As already noted, Secrets of Goth Mountain is the prequel to Government Men. It is based on two short stories in my published short story collection, a diverse collection of twenty Twilight-Zone-like fantasy and science fiction short stories titled: There Goes the Neighborhood; Earthly Fantasy/Science Fiction Short Stories.
In the current novel Government Men the unlikely hero is an inept DOD civilian scientist who leads an effort to save Earth from an impending alien-induced apocalypse. The plot reflects the fact that when I started writing this novel I was myself a DOD civilian engineer working at a base undergoing closure. Astute readers familiar with the conc
ept of anagrams hopefully noticed that the large cast includes an unlikely reincarnation of the author as Ray Dave Jigs, and still more unusual, that the novel is also included within itself. Like reading, writing should be fun.
Several additional plot-focused fantasy and/or science fiction novels and short stories also exist or are gradually being written. My published EBooks are mostly of full-length novel size, but I am currently slowly creating and releasing a series of related shorter works called Fun With Global Warming that will someday (hopefully!) be converted to an epic novel.
I generally avoid graphic depictions of sex (that's been done before!) and violence (too depressing!) and also tend to steer towards positive outcomes. Escapist fiction should generally be fun and positive. I also insist that stories be plausible, though magic and other agencies unproven by science can often be made reasonably plausible. The other thing I insist upon in each work is closure. Though my works often strongly hint at more adventures to come, all of them are self-contained and reach substantial closure within one volume.
Thank you very much for your support. Happy reading!
Gary J. Davies; Mechanicsville, Maryland, March 2014
Revised March 2015
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