She jabbed her thumb accusingly at the group of frightened-looking teachers next to her, all wearing identical wide-eyed expressions like deer in a very big headlight. Their costumes made them look ridiculous now, with something so real and serious going on.
McPherson suddenly emerged like a cartoon villain from the open gym doors. He was dressed in an all-black suit, and even the shiny shirt beneath was charcoal. "What's going on here?" he asked. Just looking at him filled me with dread.
The woman impatiently explained what had happened to her daughter. McPherson tried to calm her down, his face devoid of any emotion. "There's a protocol we have to follow," McPherson began, but Henry cut him off.
"Who cares about protocol? Let's go look for her," he said decisively. "I'm sure she's got to be in the school somewhere. We're not going to find her daughter standing around here feeling helpless."
The teachers still looked unconvinced, but some of the other adults and kids around murmured in agreement. McPherson looked ticked off that Henry had spoken up, but agreed it was a good idea. I wondered again what he had to do with it.
Everyone began to split up into groups to search the school. The four of us, with a few other people in tow, headed off down past the main hall. The missing girl's mother was leading us; she told us her name was Lynn.
She brought us to the girl's bathroom near the science hall. My eyes were drawn to the tile. There was a single, smeared red shoe print just outside the door.
"I took her to the bathroom here earlier. So, when she went missing, this was the first place I checked." She pushed the door open.
Theo and I peered inside. Blood was smeared all over the tile floor, like someone had wiped it around with their hands. It was fresh, and only just beginning to dry, the metallic smell overpowering. Theo put her hand to her mouth like she might throw up.
"This is bad," I whispered to Theo. Her face was very pale, and she nodded silently.
"See what I mean?" Lynn said. "You see." She was on the verge of breaking down, and it was only a matter of time before all of her wildest fears consumed her.
"I think you should definitely call the police," Henry told her, his deep voice hushed so only our group could hear. "Don't worry about what the teachers or McPherson are saying. If there's anyone here with you, find them. You need someone to lean on."
The woman nodded and walked off with renewed determination, cell phone in her shaking hand. I was impressed by Henry's levelheaded tone. The rest of us, without a word, continued down the hall to keep looking. No one wanted to disturb a possible murder scene.
"Susan!" we called, her name echoing off the walls, almost as if in answer to us. In the night the school looked creepy and deserted, and I felt like we shouldn't be there.
We stuck together as a group, whipping open doors and calling into classrooms. Alex opened up a closet and a bunch of dirty mops collapsed on him. He yelped, jumping backwards as the mops narrowly avoided his shoes.
The halls all started to look the same, and I wondered if we were making any progress at all. I had heard police sirens several minutes before, and assumed they were near the entrance.
After a few more minutes of fruitless searching, we took a break. Alex leaned against the wall. He looked pale against the purple of his suit. Theo was equally quiet and pallid, staring at the floor. She'd taken her gloves off and was crumpling them in her hands.
"What's taking the cops so long?" Alex asked no one in particular, taking off his shoe and rubbing his foot. Henry started popping quarters into a nearby vending machine to get drinks. He handed each of us a Coke and I thanked him. I held the cold can against my forehead. The dance itself seemed like a distant, fragile memory.
Ariel...
Someone was calling my name again. Putting the pop down on a nearby drinking fountain, I left the others where they were standing and discussing the police's arrival, and turned the corner. A sharp pain stabbed my temple, as if something was forcing its way through. Energy danced its familiar pattern on the surface of my skin.
The little girl in the blue raincoat was standing in front of me, about two yards away. I could feel reality trying to peel back like the skin of an onion. My mind started to float away from my body, but in my dissociation I clung to consciousness as hard as I could.
She turned and glided silently away. I remembered where I'd seen her—she was the little girl that went missing a month ago. The knowledge that her name was Alyssa entered my mind, and I pictured Claire watching the news the night we had gone out to dinner.
I could faintly see the hallway through Alyssa's raincoat. The lights dimmed and flickered, everything taking on a bluish hue like we were underwater. I could vaguely see cut marks scoring her small arms.
I knew she was dead. But for some reason, I wasn't frightened anymore. Tranquility settled over me, a calm in knowing that what was happening was real.
I walked towards her slowly.
"Alyssa?" I called. She turned around. Her eyes were completely black, like those of an insect. I shuddered and shut my eyes as an image was forced into my mind—Alyssa standing at the bus stop, waiting, when hands attached to nothing snatched her. She was too startled to scream as she was thrown in the back of a beaten up van. The van sped off through the driving rain.
"Your parents have been looking for you," I said. She stared through me. I couldn't really tell if she knew I was there or not—it was as if we were in two different but very close parallel worlds.
"What happened to you?" I asked. "Why am I seeing you?"
As if in answer, Alyssa's small hands went to the hood of her coat. The little red slices on her forearms stood out plainly. She pulled the hood down and I stifled the automatic gag that clenched my throat. Her neck was cleanly sliced from side to side. There was no blood, but that didn't make it any less grotesque.
"Are you the one that's been messing with the lights?" I asked, the connection occurring to me as I spoke it aloud.
In answer, Alyssa's black eyes slowly tracked up to the ceiling. The blue lights around us flickered off and on rapidly. After a few seconds of blinking, they remained lit. She looked back at me pointedly.
"But why?" I asked.
Suddenly, she was gone. The blue of the walls melted into the regular cream color that I saw every day, the lights returning to their normal, dull hue.
"Ariel, what are you doing?" Theo called.
I turned around and saw my three friends waiting, watching me with hesitation.
"Nothing," I called. "I'm coming back."
Glancing around to make sure Alyssa was truly gone, I jogged back to them. Apparently, the police were taking statements. I didn't say a word to my friends about seeing Alyssa. I didn't have any urge to; it was my own personal gift.
We walked to the front of the building, where two officers in uniform were questioning the now-sobbing Lynn. Tears flowed freely down her cheeks, and she was having tremendous difficulty speaking. A female friend had her arm around Lynn, murmuring soothing words into her ear.
When I was a little girl, burglars broke into the house across the street. The police came to the neighborhood and talked to Hugh about it, asking him if he had seen anything. Jenna and I stood behind him the whole time, so excited that a real life drama was taking place in front of our eyes.
It had been less exciting when they grilled me after Jenna vanished. Asking why I had let her go, and if I suspected she was involved in drugs. A hundred questions had been aimed towards me, and I couldn't answer them fast enough.
As Theo and I departed Hawthorne with our dates, treading over the torn purple carpet and fallen paper bats, I felt the same feeling of being drained. Henry had his arm around me, and Theo was wearing Alex's suit jacket. I could still hear Lynn's heartbroken voice as she sobbed, the family friend taking her home without her daughter.
We stopped at one of the cubbies so Henry could tie his shoes. Looking down, he read off the graffiti.
> "Your love is all I think about."
CHAPTER 21
SCHOOL FELT LIKE a crime scene. After my parents received word of Susan's disappearance, I wasn't allowed to walk to school anymore. I'd had a feeling that the time was coming, but getting rid of my limited independence was still a blow.
The fact that I had seen a ghost didn't surprise me as much as perhaps it should have. Instead, I felt more relief than anything. Even though it was entirely subjective, I felt like it proved that I wasn't crazy, especially after hearing about Eleanor from Corinne. I had inherited mommy's, well, grandma's little gift, after it skipped a generation. But I didn't know what to do now.
I kept expecting Alyssa to pop up again, to clarify what I'd seen, but nothing abnormal happened.
Hugh dropped me off the Monday morning after the dance. I had forgotten to set my alarm, and the bell was due to ring in a few minutes. I wasn't late yet, but I was close.
I walked up the stone steps and opened the door to the vestibule, rubbing sleep from my eyes. When I took my hand away, I gasped.
Jenna laughing. In front of me. And next to her was Alyssa.
Their faces were printed on black and white fliers that someone had taped to the entrance doors, and Susan's face joined them. The word MISSING was typed in thick font below each photo. Shaken, I opened the door and walked inside.
Lainey and Madison sat at a metal card table in the center of the main hall. Neat stacks of fliers were piled in front of them. Their own missing girl committee. My stomach did a somersault.
I walked over to the wall and ripped down one of the Alyssa's fliers. I couldn't bear to do it with one of Jenna's. I went up and shook the crumpled piece of paper in Lainey's face. She leaned back in her seat, her chin doubling as she scowled at me.
"What are you doing?" I barked.
"What does it look like?" she asked, a condescending smile on her bow-shaped lips. "I assume your eyes still work. We're helping."
"If I had any inkling that you had an ounce of good intention, I would thank you," I said. "But this is nothing more than a ploy to draw more attention to yourself. You don't need it!"
"I'm just a concerned citizen, Ariel," she said, her chocolate chip eyes becoming round and innocent. "Even if Jenna was a waste of oxygen."
I had never had such a massive urge to punch someone, especially when she said, "I haven't seen you do much for her. Trying to get into Henry's pants doesn't count."
I crumpled the flyer and tossed it in Lainey's face. It bounced off of her powdered forehead. Madison scoffed and leaned back in her own seat, glaring at me as I stomped away.
Despite the events at the dance, school kept going like nothing had happened. A lot of people were talking about Susan's disappearance, and the dance in general, but the teachers seemed to shy away from the topic, even with the gaudy flyers in every hallway. I wondered if they'd had a meeting on how to deal with us. For damage control, counselors wandered into first period, offering "someone to talk to" in case we needed it. I kept my head down and pretended to ignore them as other students tearfully wandered out.
In gym class, we were starting tennis. It was always the one sport that I kind of enjoyed. Claire and I used to drive up to the court at the middle school during the summer and play until the sun went down, drinking Kool-Aid mixed in water bottles. I had even taken a few lessons.
Theo and I paired up, grabbing rackets out of the metal bin.
"Why Alex?" I finally got the chance to inquire, still curious about how that pairing had been established.
"I honestly have no idea," she said, shrugging. "He's just really into me. It's flattering. And he's not as bad as he seems. After I left your house on Saturday, we talked online for hours. He has a sweet side; it's just buried deep, deep below the douchey act and terrible jokes."
Her words reminded me of what Henry had said. Alex had seemed awfully attentive at the dance.
We started playing against the other pairings in class. It felt nice to get my body moving, almost like I was taking out my stress on every swing, successful or not. I hoped the hour would run out before we had to play Lainey.
But of course it didn't, and we were pitted against the torture twins. We made the slow march to their net. Both girls were stretching their shoulders out, using their rackets for resistance. Lainey's eyes held on me with a curious fixation, giving me goosebumps. I wondered what insults were brewing in her tiny mind.
Theo served first, tossing the ball too high in her fervor. She swung clumsily and grazed the ball with the edge of her racket. Her second try whizzed right into our side of the net. That had been her method the whole time, but this was the only match where it really counted.
Lainey and Madison tittered with laughter. I looked at Theo sympathetically. Her face was almost as red as her hair.
"You serve first, Maddie," Lainey commanded.
Madison tossed the ball up daintily and swung her racket to meet it. Theo and I scrambled to the side of the court and rebounded the ball.
Despite the bad start, we held our own for the duration, which seemed to make Lainey angry. Not only when I returned her shots, but when she missed mine. Her eyebrows puckered, her hair unraveling from the tight, slick ponytail.
I'd never seen Lainey sweat, but little beads broke out across her tanned forehead. Her mascara was running underneath her eyes, making her look exhausted.
The score had been tied the last few minutes. Every time the ball whizzed over the net I prayed we could hit it back and win, the tension unbearable. The competition suddenly meant more than just a gym grade.
Lainey got ready to serve and her gaze locked on mine again. Hate made her eyes hard. She tossed the yellow ball up in the air and slammed it with all her strength, nailing me directly in the nose.
The sickening crack resounded through my skull, and my body fell backwards in slow motion. I expected to hit the hard parquet floor, but instead I fell through, the jolt I expected never coming.
I tumbled.
And then I stopped, and everything was black and silent.
I felt warmth on my cheeks, and I could smell the ocean. I opened my eyes and saw blue sky above me.
I could feel my limbs resting on a bed of beach sand. Before I had much time to contemplate this, Jenna leaned over me. The necklace with her name on it dangled from around her neck. The sun caught the tiny rhinestones and they twinkled.
The sky instantly went dark, large rain droplets splotching my skin. I felt paralyzed, without the strength to move. The smell changed to something briny and complicated.
Jenna was still leaning over me, although now the necklace was missing. Her face was as blank as it had been in my orphanage dream, like she was inspecting an alien. Curly hair like brambles fell around her face. Seeing her gave me no solace. Only fear.
I noticed with a chill that her eyes were entirely black. No longer sky blue, it was as if the pupils had taken over everything else. Who else had I seen with black eyes...with I start I realized it was the little dead girl. That meant...
My vision flickered again, and we were on the beach. I felt myself able to sit up, and began to do so. But as I moved my surroudings continued to waver. We were on the shore of a lake, a muddy bank replacing the gritty sand. My fingers sank into the muck, and the green lake water began to boil.
Back to the beach, sunlight glittered off of the lazy waves.
You've never been to the beach, Jenna, I thought. You always wanted to go but your parents never had the time...
I tried to speak, but I tumbled again, falling through empty, thick air. The sun became the yellow orb of the tennis ball, whirling straight for me. White hot pain split my face in two as blackness swept over me. A roar of noise filled my ears like water. It hurt. Everything hurt, even the sound.
Hawthorne's gymnasium crashed back to reality. I didn't remember opening my eyes; I could just see again. My entire head and face hurt, radiating back to my ears. My eyelids
were puffy, so I could only see through little slits.
I found my limbs again and brought my hand to the wetness on my upper lip. Blood coated my fingers. My mouth was full of the rusty metallic taste, choking me. Not to mention I had the worst migraine ever, even worse than my unfortunate head injury at the orphanage.
I sat up carefully, still in shock. My t-shirt was dyed with blood, the entire front so red it looked fake. I silently thanked the universe for my strong stomach. Seeing that much blood come from my own body terrified me. For a split second I wondered if I was going to die, before I pulled myself together. No one could die from a tennis ball.
The gym was chaos. Kids were shouting, screaming. Everyone had stopped playing and had formed a circle around me. A forest of faces, some scared, some flushed with excitement like this was the best entertainment they'd had in weeks. The attention I hadn't wanted was all on me. I caught a few phones filming me and I cringed, not wanting to see this particular video pop up online and knowing there was no way to prevent it.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" Theo's voice rang out clearly, like a very pissed off bell.
"It was an accident!" Lainey replied, the ever-present self-assured quality in her voice gone.
I searched the crowd, and found the red patch of Theo's hair. The people around them were backing away. Theo stood with her fists clenched, rising on her toes as if to appear taller. Lainey stood her ground, but she looked like she was shaking.
I heard Coach Fletcher's voice in the back of the crowd.
"Get out of my way!" she shouted.
I tried to stand, but I was still disoriented, not only from the pain and shock but from the vision of my absent friend that I had just been wrenched from. Reality didn't feel real or right. It felt more like watching a badly filmed movie.
Theo stepped up so that she was nose to nose with Lainey. "You can't get away with this." She put both small hands on Lainey's shoulders and shoved her.
Lainey stumbled a fraction of an inch. A switch flicked on inside her.
"Get your grimy hands off of me!" she squealed. She pushed back with her palms flat, sending Theo staggering into some onlookers. My trauma was all but forgotten, and they were the new sideshow. The paparazzi of camera phones turned their way.