We arrived back at the house without incident. As we pulled into the driveway, I debated getting out and flying home right away. I stared out the passenger window as Rael stopped the car. I caught his thoughts, more than the movement, as I watched his intent to get to my door fast.
I thought to actually do it … step out and fly home immediately. My mind was numb from fear, and I moved slowly when the car stopped. I'd never seen anyone move so quickly. I barely grabbed the door handle to open the door by the time Rael hopped out of the car, swung his door closed, slid over the hood of the car, and opened my door.
I looked up into his eyes. He took my hands in his and smiled gently at me. He wanted to portray himself as being as kindly as possible. Worry wracked my brain. I couldn't smile, and pursed my lips as I looked down.
We walked into the house. Rael pretty much led me to his room; he grabbed a shirt, and walked me to the bathroom. He closed the door behind us and gently ripped my shirt off me. I was already in a shocked mindset; that certainly didn't help clear my head.
He stayed behind me, wet a small towel and proceeded to wash off my back. Then he slid the towel around my front and washed off my bloody stomach. The blood on the shirt had re-stained my body.
If I don’t tell them, they won’t trust me, and will know I’m keeping things from them. But if I tell them I hear everything they think, they won’t want to hang around with me for fear I’ll intrude on everything they think of. Rael especially, with all those dirty thoughts in his head, he won’t want to be around me. Lance will think I’m invading everyone’s privacy. What about when others find out? Oh, my. I’m going to have to move just to be around people that don’t know me … until they find out. I’ll be on the run constantly, having to find new friends in every town, until something happens and they realize that I’m intruding on them too.
He mumbled, “This is too hard.” He spun me around to face him. “Damn, the shot wounds bled to your pants.” He proceeded to unbutton and pull down my pants. He finished washing off my stomach and upper thighs, dropped the washcloth on my pants and used a fresh towel to dry me off. Rael wasn't thinking much during this entire time. He simply paid attention to what he was doing, with an occasional glance at various areas of my body.
Rael slowly stood up and pulled me close to him, then hugged me tightly. He said, “I don't care what you've done, or think you've done. It won't bother me.”
I hugged him back and said, “I hope so.” For the first time since being back in the crowd near the crash that I realized I had shunted his mindview around constantly – it had confused me. Rael’s hug brought back a stable mindview and I received the dual feedback I seemed to receive from anyone touching me. The hug was unbelievably comforting.
I practically melted into his arms; he probably held me up more than I did. I didn’t know how long we stood there like that, I didn’t believe I’d ever felt so comforted in my life. I guess there are other benefits to tying into other people’s senses than just sharing massages with them or their enjoyment of food.
He finally stepped back, took the extra shirt, pulled my arms up and slid the shirt over them. I could see where he was really looking though. My naughty minded Rael. Hopefully mine, after what I had to tell them all. I could just head out and fly away … literally. No one needs to know I’m a thought-thief.
Rael grabbed the bloody clothes and towel; then pulled me along with him to their laundry room while he threw them in a load with cold water. Oh, now I see in his mind why he changed my clothes. He doesn’t want the couch ruined with blood stains. Why didn’t I notice that before?
He then pulled me to the living room. I looked at the front door. I could still run for it, could still fly away. The door’s only a dozen feet away … so close. My friends don't have to hate me…. Rael held my hand and my side though. I'd have to fight him, and I liked his touch too much. I sighed. These were my friends; I had to be honest with them.
Rael sat me down in the center of the couch, and then knelt down in front of me, resting his hands on my knees. Lance sat on my right, Tina sat on my left. Their mindviews became quite sizable with them sitting so close to me.
Lance said, “This is tearing you up. Until you spill it, it's going to continue causing you problems….” He took my right hand in his.
Do I or don’t I? I don’t want to leave my friends. I sighed again, and made the decision. I said, “All right, here goes.... When people think near me, I hear it as if they said it. When they visualize something, I see that too.”
Rael said, “That's it? That's what you are so freaked out about?”
I sighed again, “There's no privacy, Rael. It's always on. I keep visualizing it as a restaurant, where the people sitting at my table I can hear fine. Those farther away dim down into murmurs, although for me they are staying clear enough to understand throughout the entire restaurant. Now throw on top of that a TV for each person nearest me, they float in my vision.”
I took my hand from Lance and made large boxes in the air where I saw their mindviews now. Sitting so tightly around me, each of them filled perhaps a sixth of my total visual space. It was almost easier watching what they saw than see out of my own eyes.
“Those are where I see your mindviews now. If I focus I can pull one up to cover my entire vision. I can feel what you feel, too, through them.”
Rael said, “Feel as in emotions, or senses, like touch?”
“Both.”
Tina said, “Wait, you said it never turns off?”
“Never.”
“What happens when more people are in a room?”
“Then I hear more and more voices talking, and more and more mindviews show up in my vision. It becomes like a busy restaurant where everyone starts talking at once, and the volume becomes loud enough to make it hard to understand other people at your table.”
Tina said, “So ... when you were right by the crowd, you were hearing dozens of voices, and seeing many TVs?”
“Yep. It gets hard to think, see and hear. Well, actually I continue hearing just fine. It’s just that I also hear everyone thinking everything, and since most people think a lot more than they say, it’s really noisy.”
Rael said, “Ah. That explains why you were stumbling when we took you through the crowd near the corner.”
I said, “Yeah, but don't you guys understand? I'm listening in on everything you guys are thinking. I can't stop.” I raised my arms and flopped them back onto my lap to emphasize the point.
I put my hands over Rael’s, where they rested on my knees to prevent him from acting on the thoughts running through his head. He’d debated on tickling me.
Rael raised an eyebrow and grinned at me. “Is that an attempt to keep me from doing it?”
Lance had problems figuring out what we meant. He was a person who worked well off drawings, but not as well off purely conceptual ideas. He watched Rael closely in the hopes of picking up clues from his friend.
Tina attempted to visualize a crowd full of voices, and being in front of a television store with a dozen screens up in front of her at once.
I said, “Tina, you’ve got the right idea by thinking of the front of a TV store. Now make the screens move around based on where the people are, and become larger as they get close to you.”
Rael’s eyes narrowed as he thought about last night. He’d wanted me to go back to massaging his shoulders, and I had. He’d thought about me sliding over to him in bed, and I’d done that too. I’d even looked surprised and tensed up afterward. He had thought he had a power over me, but he now realized that I had reacted to his thoughts either unconsciously, or not under my own control.
He suddenly shifted into a cross-legged sitting position. He squeezed my legs gently and let his hands fall back to his thighs. My eyes widened in fear. He’s going to try something to me, he’s not thinking ahead of his actions.
I began to say, “What ar
e … you.…” He interrupted my line of thought with a clear visual of me sliding down off the couch onto his lap. He even tried a mental loud, echoing mental statement of “Come to me.” I discovered that just as mental ‘shouts’ sounded louder, someone focusing extremely hard on a visual forced their mindview to enlarge on my visual field.
His mindview reduced in size somewhat, and I laughed as I said, “What was ... oh crap.” I found that I sat on his lap. I barely remembered actually moving while he’d been thinking that. He slid his arms around my waist and hugged me, then chuckled evilly.
Rael said, “Sweet, I think I like this.”
Lance said, “What do you mean.”
Rael bonked me lightly on the head with his forehead. He said, “Give her some really good visuals of things you'd like to do to her, or have her do. She reacts, I dunno, like she’s hypnotized. That's what happened last night, isn't it?”
I flushed dark red. Tina looked confused.
Lance said, “But, I wasn't thinking….”
Rael slapped himself on the forehead, “No, I was though, in great detail. Steph, are you telling me you can't resist doing what others picture you doing?”
I said, “Pfah, of course I can. I think. I ... I dunno. If I pull a mindview up close it has more impact on me, and physical proximity makes the visuals larger as well. Like last night, and right now. Like today with the angry guy with the gun. When he shot me it made me so mad I shouted at the area.”
Tina said, “Yeah, I heard that, very clearly too. You … you shouted directly into our minds!” Her face went serious as she thought.
I glanced toward her, and said to the boys, “She’s beginning to see my fear of telling you. I hear you thinking it, Tina; you might as well just say it.”
Tina said, “Okay. Stephanie can read our minds at will. More than at will, all the time, at least when near her. You can see what we think, even feel what we feel. There’s nothing private. If I thought about grabbing Lance’s butt, she’d know I was thinking it.”
Rael shrugged, “I’m not seeing the problem.”
Tina said, “Don’t you see? Even if I don’t do anything, she still knows I thought it. What if I thought about robbing a bank? I’m not about to do it, but she knows I thought about it. What about people’s private sex thoughts? Account numbers? PINs? Secrets they know about other people? Their own secrets?”
Lance said, “Wow, you can see all that?”
I said, “I hear everything you are thinking or see right now, as you think it. If you think of your bank account number, then yeah, I’ll either hear it or see it, depending on if you tend to recite the numbers to yourself, or visualize them. It seems to be different for different people.”
All three of them mentally recited a series of numbers. Tina actually put a visual to each number, such as the image of a credit card, and her bank.
I continued, “Apparently even mentioning account numbers starts people on a cycle of reciting their various numbers in their heads. You guys just flashed me a bunch of them. I’m almost glad I’m not eidetic.”
Tina’s voice was picking up volume as she started to mentally ‘freak out’ about so many secrets and hidden things we all keep from others.
I said, “The more excited you are in your thinking, or perhaps the more forceful the thinking, the louder it makes it in my head. You’re mentally shouting at me right now, Tina.”
Tina said, “Yeah, that’s part of the problem though! It’s my head, my thoughts you are in!”
I nodded and sighed. “I know. It’s just … there. This is part of why I was so afraid to bring it up.”
Lance said, “This is hard to imagine for me. So … you are seeing a picture of what I’m seeing?”
“Yes.”
“But what if my eyes are closed?”
“Then I see what you are visualizing, if anything. Otherwise your mindview, or mental TV, is black. That seems pretty rare though. People are always putting a picture to what they are thinking.”
“So … what if my eyes are open and I’m visualizing something?”
“If you think quickly of your mustang, I’ll see the image of the mustang overlay what your eyes see. If you focus hard on the mustang, and really picture it in great detail, then I only see the mustang.” I sighed. “In Rael’s case just now, all I saw was his image of me sliding down onto his lap; I didn’t even realize I’d done it.”
The glee Rael felt flowed through his mindview at me, making me feel somewhat better about the lack of control over myself. I gave him an evil eye and punched him in the shoulder regardless.
Lance said, “I guess I can understand Tina then. I mean, we all watch other people when they aren’t looking at us, now none of that is private.”
“I know, I’ve been finding out just how many people stare at my different body parts as the day goes on. Strangely enough, it’s not the same for everyone though, so at least there is some variety. But I am getting a lot of visuals of myself. Glad I’m a little narcissistic.” I smiled weakly.
I continued, “I already knew you guys watched me a lot, and it never bothered me before, so I really don’t mind knowing that you do it so much.”
Lance said, “Yeah, that’s kind of the problem. It’s not your option to mind it. I think I am understanding Tina much better now. Simply because other people think something won’t give you the right to react to it as if they did it.”
Rael said, “I’d prefer if she reacted to my thoughts.”
Lance snapped at Rael, “Stop thinking dirty thoughts for a moment. Or maybe not. What if some guy was thinking really dirty thoughts about Steph near her? Getting on his case about it isn’t fair. It wouldn’t be right. Now if he is leering at her in public, sure that’s a physical action. But if he were daydreaming.…”
Rael said, “Or if a guy were thinking thoughts about someone other than his girlfriend or wife. Hmm. So she can’t react to them, and if she doesn’t say anything to other people, then where’s the harm? Well, other than her knowing that he’s a lech.”
Lance said, “Steph, you’ll need to be very, very careful about gossip. You might accidentally give away something that rightfully should stay secret.”
“I’m well aware of that.”
Rael said, “As far as I’m concerned, this isn’t a big deal, so long as Steph isn’t telling everyone about everyone else’s secrets. I’ve known her for a long time, I don’t believe she’d steal from someone for a second, so hearing account numbers and such seems like a petty concern to me. She already knows I’m a lech, so I doubt I’ve been a surprise lately. So unless you are in secret, Lance, this whole thing just doesn’t matter to me.”
Lance gave Rael a recriminating look. “I don’t believe I am. My mom would kill me if she thought I acted that way, or even thought it.”
Tina said, “I think now I understand some of the little smiles and glances you’ve been giving to different people now. You are hearing something funny or interesting.”
I nodded, “It’s hard for me not to react a little, sometimes. To me it sounds like I’m hearing your mental voice out loud. Actually, it’s hard to tell the difference at times. Now, people who think ahead, but talk slowly can actually be kind of irritating. It’s like I’m hearing an echo. But hopefully you’ve noticed that I don’t say anything about it, or at least try not to.”
Tina said, “So, just for the heck of it. If I were to think of something like, say, jumping Lance’s bones, what would you do?”
“Nothing, except perhaps to ask you to make the visuals better.” I grinned.
Tina blushed.
Rael said, “You do realize that if you are going to be reading my mind, I fully intend to be mean to you?”
I smiled, “You did before you knew.”
“Oh, no. Most of that was minor league stuff. You get to know my dirty secrets; I’m going to get my enjoyment back out of you.”
>
I frowned. “I hope you won’t in public, please.”
Tina said, “Okay, my turn. Sorry in advance if it’s a problem, Steph.”
I said, “Problem? Oh come … on.” How did this become about doing stuff to me?
Tina understood what Rael meant when he made me slide onto his lap. She imagined me looking back at Rael and kissing him passionately. Oh no, come on, Tina ... get off this idea of coupling us up!
I felt this irrational desire to do it. I resisted, but she kept up with the visual, she even began a quiet verbal chant of “Kiss him, kiss him.” She was determined to make me do it, and I lost focus. I kissed Rael. He didn’t complain. I felt unusually happy, gleeful and confused as we kissed. Then, the double sensation from Rael’s mindview kicked in, and I didn’t want to stop the kiss.
I heard Tina thinking for Rael to stroke my hair back, and it shook me out of the near trance from the kiss. Thanks a lot, Tina. I didn’t want to … well … hadn’t planned to…. Oh, man, I love kissing now. I found myself staring into Rael’s catlike eyes. I didn’t realize that cat eyes weren’t always slit, but sometimes had a round iris. I blushed as it struck me that we’d done that with Lance and Tina as an audience.
Tina clapped and bounced on the couch where she sat. “Nice! It works!”
I rolled my eyes. “Great. I’m opening myself up to you guys, and you make me your puppet. I wasn’t even sure last night if what you thought made me do something. Obviously other people can make me do things now.” I sighed and put on my glum face.
Rael said, “So … you didn’t want to massage my shoulders last night? Or cuddle with me? Or sit on my lap?”
Lance said, “She enjoyed giving that massage, you should have seen her face. Why is that? Wait, you said you feel what others feel. So … you felt what when you massaged him?”
I said, “Rael, I, ah, yeah, I’m fine with all those. You didn’t make me start giving you the massage, just restart it. And no, I um, kind of liked the kiss, so I’m not even mad at Tina. However, Tina, you bonehead, just because you can make me kiss him doesn’t mean that you can make him stroke my hair back!”
She stopped clapping and stared at me. “Oh. Well, he was holding you, how am I supposed to know I can’t have him do something.” Rael laughed.
He grinned and said, “I like where you were going with it, though.”
Tina said, “I can’t believe that actually works. That is like, so cool!” I slapped my forehead. Great, she's going to cause me all sorts of problems.
Lance said, “Hey, I had a question in there! And what works?
Tina looked at him. “Lance, you are so sweet sometimes. I made her kiss Rael. Right, right? That was my thinking that did it?”
I kept my hand on my head and blushed. Did they need to teach each other how to do it? I nodded.
Lance said, “No way. Really?”
I buried my face in Rael’s shoulder. Lance and Tina stared at me, Lance in wonderment, Tina with glee. Rael put his hand on my head and grinned, then winked at Lance.
I mumbled, “I saw that.”
Huddling against Rael must have kicked off his protective nature. I felt it in waves as he put his arms around me and hugged.
Lance said, “Okay, my question is still out there though. What did you feel when you massaged him?”
I lifted my head to look at him, though I already had a clear view of him through the others. “I seem to feel emotions flow through the mindviews, as well as other senses. I can hear and see what you do, and taste, smell, touch, etc. if I pay attention. Giving Rael a shoulder massage was almost like giving myself one, both from the feeling on the shoulders to the enjoyment of it. Those didn’t seem as strong, so I don’t know if I have to concentrate on getting them, or just be close, or what.”
“Whoa.”
Tina said, “Like, oh my god. So when you kiss Rael, you feel it, and you feel him feeling it?”
I nodded.
“And you said you feel enjoyment too, so do you feel yours plus his, or just his at that point?”
“Both.”
Her eyes got big and she imagined some rather naughty scenes in her mind. I was so glad that she pictured herself doing them rather than me – and with Lance, nonetheless, or I had a bad feeling that Rael and I would be doing them right now. I coughed gently. She glanced at me, and then flushed bright red as she realized I saw what she was thinking.
Rael said, “Come on, girls. Now is confession time, no secrets!”
Tina eyes were large as she shook her head slightly and looked at me. Mentally she thought, No, no no no, please don’t tell. Oh man, she’s going to tell on me.
I smiled at her, “No, this is my confession time. Tina can have her own some other time. By the way, you don't have to think to me in the third person, you know. If you think a sentence as though you would say it out loud to me, I hear it the same, probably louder than a whisper would be, too.”
Rael said, “Bah. You guys are no fun. Though, I could try to force you to talk about it.…”
I looked at him, “That’s not cool.”
Lance nodded, “I agree. We just got done telling Steph that she shouldn’t share the secrets of others. Do we need to have the same talk with you?”
Rael replied, “All right, fine. No promises as far as working it out of Tina some other way though. I’m devious like that, you know.” I didn’t find it surprising that he immediately thought of tickling her.
Lance coughed. “Well, umm, didn’t we have lunch plans?” He wasn’t as clueless as he let on. He thought that Tina’s thoughts might have had something to do with him.
Tina laughed nervously, “Yeah. Yeah, lunch plans.”
I said, “Do you guys forgive me?”
Rael replied, “How could I not forgive you? I told you this wouldn’t be that big of a deal.”
I said, “Seriously though.”
Rael debated the pros and cons in his mind. From me knowing everything he thinks and sees, to being able to mess with my head, so to speak. He said, “I’m not bothered. Again, don’t expect me to not be mean to you on occasion though. Two way street, babe.”
Lance said, “I’m okay, I guess. I can’t say as I really hide much that I know of, so I’m not overly worried. Just be aware that some things from people may be unconscious or private, and not to react to them. You need to be the world’s best darn gossip keeper … or preventer.”
Tina said, “I’m not the most comfortable with it, but if I feel like you are abusing my knowledge, I won’t be happy about it. At least I feel good about being your hypnotist whenever I’m nearby. I’m kind of with Rael though. If you’re going to be stealing my secrets all the time, I won’t promise not to use my new powers of hypnotism.”
I thought about that for a moment. I guess I’d rather have them do some little mean things to me than to hate me for listening in on their thoughts. I can handle that tradeoff.
I said, “Fair enough. Would you guys keep this stuff our secret, though? I’d rather not have everyone and their brother knowing I hear what they think. It’ll make people paranoid of being around me.”
Rael said, “I’m sure we can come to some kind of protection arrangement that gets paid on a regular basis to keep our silence.” He grinned.
I said, “You know, mentioning hypnosis … maybe I should change from my genetics degree to one in psychiatry.…”
Tina snorted and laughed, “Nice. Now … think about your mother….”
Chapter 24 – Girl’s Time
Third Person Perspective