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Delilah and Menolly glanced at each other. Delilah started to blush. They’d treated Trillian like dirt when we were first together, and it had driven a wedge between the three of us for a while.
“Well, now I feel like a crap bucket,” Menolly said. She set down the pies and walked over to Trillian, where she gave his ponytail a gentle yank. “We gave you a lot of shit and we’re sorry. But you have to admit, you can be an asshole sometimes. ”
Trillian leaned back and folded his arms as he leaned back against the counter. “You and Delilah did give me a lot of shit. And of course I’m an arrogant ass, but you have to admit, I have the goods to back it up. ” He smiled, and then Menolly smiled, and everybody took a deep breath and started moving again.
Menolly flicked his nose. “Sit down, eat. ”
“We were pretty bad. ” Delilah started filling her plate. “But you know what? Water under the bridge. We’re all one big happy family now. ”
“One big happy family?” I glanced around the room. Everybody was busy, the food was being passed around, Trillian went back to handing pitchers of lemonade over to the table, and even though the demons were outside the gate, I realized that Delilah was right. We were one big happy family.
I slid the talisman back into the pouch. “I’ll put this on tomorrow afternoon to give myself a couple of hours to settle into my new looks. What are the specs on it? No dwarves this time, I hope. ”
Trillian snorted and took a chair beside me. Smoky was on the other side. “No dwarves. I promise. You’ll look mostly human, though gorgeous as always. But you won’t look like you. ”
Wondering what the charm would do, I reached for a chicken thigh and then piled mashed potatoes and gravy on my plate. Besides the coleslaw and biscuits, Iris had added a platter of carrot sticks, cucumber slices, and cherry tomatoes to the table, and soon we were all busy eating, telling them about our day. And for once, the rest of the evening proved to be just as calm, and we took full advantage of the downtime.
Shortly before bed, I closed myself into my study, where the Whispering Mirror was. It had been a long time since I’d had any time to myself and, with the upcoming foray into the Aleksais Psychic Network, I wanted to meditate.
My study had evolved over the past couple of years. When we first moved here, I’d furnished it with a desk, the table that held the Whispering Mirror, a couple of chairs, and a bunch of shelves and drawers to hold spell components. I also had a small table where I could blend oils or brew potions.
Now the desk had been replaced with a huge wonder in solid oak, thanks to Smoky, who had decided the room needed an overhaul. He’d also come up with matching bookshelves; a credenza in place of the particleboard dressers; an apothecary case with a hundred little drawers, perfect for holding bits of herbs and bones; and a matching table to replace the cheap one originally holding the Whispering Mirror. A polished wooden rocking chair, a burgundy velvet love seat, and a Tiffany-style lamp in either corner completed the look, and now my study truly looked like a study.
I ran my hands along the spines of the books on the shelf. Some were in English—Earthside books. Alongside them were a few from Otherworld, hand-bound volumes I’d studied from over the years when I was first accepted into the Coterie of the Moon Mother. The books had been so big I could barely carry them when I was little. I’d finally resorted to using the toy wagon my father had given me to drag them around.
I pulled one off the shelf and settled into the rocking chair. As I flipped through the pages, I came to one in particular that made me stop. There was a pressed rose between the pages—paper-thin now. It had been forty ES years since I’d held the flower to my nose and breathed in the scent. It had been back when I was just into womanhood—still the equivalent to a young teenager, if I’d been full-blooded human. I’d fallen in love for the first time. Only it hadn’t been with a boy…no, it had been with the Moon Mother herself.
Leaning my head back against the slats of the rocker, I gently lifted the rose out of the book, then closed my eyes, remembering the night when I knew—absolutely knew—that I was in love with a goddess.
The night was warm, and I was sitting outside. I’d climbed up a ladder to the roof, where I could see the sky and the stars. Menolly and Delilah never understood the draw, and I was just as happy they decided to stay inside. Between taking care of the house, studying with the Coterie of the Moon Mother, and my studies to eventually enter the Y’Elestrial Intelligence Agency, I never had any time to myself. I leaned back on my elbows and stared up at the sky.
The moon was full tonight, and Menolly had promised to watch over Delilah, who had already turned into Tabby for the night. A light breeze wafted by, playing with my hair, and I inhaled deeply, lingering over the scents riding the wind.
The moon was full and shining, a silver orb hanging in the sky. As I watched her, silent and in awe, a rush of love welled up in my heart. I’d always envied Derisa, the High Priestess, as she led the weekly rites, but tonight…tonight I knew she would be running with the Moon Mother as the Hunt raced through the sky. And I wanted to be there, wanted to taste that freedom.
I was due, in a couple of years, to face the test, to be either given full entrance into the Order or turned away forever. I’d trained for so long, tried so hard, but the fear that I might not be good enough raged through my heart. I’d tried to talk to Shamas about it as we walked through the fields, but he never wanted to hear about my studies with the Coterie. I cared about him, even suspected I was beginning to have feelings for my cousin and that they were reciprocated, so I let the discussion drop, since it so clearly made him uncomfortable.
And I’d locked away the fear, deep inside. But tonight, it rose thick in my throat, choking out my joy. As I watched the Moon Mother’s glowing gem rise into the sky, I started to cry.
“What are you afraid of?”
The woman’s voice startled me and I sat up, looking around, but no one was there. Not sure whether I’d imagined it, I tried to relax again, to take my thoughts off the fear.
“I repeat: What are you afraid of? What do you fear?”
Not sure where the voice was coming from but feeling compelled to answer, I wrapped my arms around my knees and stared up at the moon.
“I’m afraid…of not being good enough. ”
“Is that all you fear?”
Biting my lower lip, I struggled with the question. Was it all I feared? And wasn’t it enough? But then I let out a long breath and lowered my gaze, staring at the roof. “No, it’s not. I’m afraid…of losing the chance to walk under the Moon Mother’s light. ”
“You can always walk under the moon. ”
“No—it’s not that. I’m afraid…” I wasn’t sure how to phrase it, especially since I had no clue to whom I was talking, but I had to answer. That much I knew.
“What do you fear, Camille?”
The voice was ancient, echoing through the night. I picked up a pebble and chucked it off the roof. Finally I said, “I’m afraid…that she won’t want me. And I couldn’t bear that. ”
“Why? What is so special about being part of the Coterie of the Moon Mother?” There was no judgment, almost no emotion behind the words. The questions were just that—questions—but they were skidding through my mind like a runaway cart.
“Being chosen by the Moon Mother…it means everything. I’ve never wanted anything else. I never expect to be a priestess—I know my heritage keeps me from being strong enough for that, but to be one of the Moon Mother’s witches? That would mean more than I can ever express. ”
“Why?”
“To have her love…to be able to give her mine. ” And then I knew. “I love her—unreasonably, without logic, without hesitation. It doesn’t matter why. The fact is, I love the Moon Mother and she is my everything, my all. I want to be part of her world, to dance under her glowing radiance, to revere her, to worship her, to make her
magic. ”
“You can do all of those things without belonging to her order. ”
“Yes, but I want her to love me. ” I began to cry. “I want her to smile down on me, and say, ‘You’re mine. You’re my daughter. Stay with me always. ’”
“You love her. ”
“I love her. I would give my life for her if necessary. ”
I looked down to find a rose there. A beautiful deep red rose. I picked it up and smelled it, holding it to my nose. I’d never smelled anything so incredibly intoxicating.
“It will be a long journey, and you may regret it…”
Lying back, I stared up at the sky as I laid the rose between my breasts.
“No,” I whispered. “I never, ever will regret it. ” And the voice vanished, and I realized that I’d just promised my life in an unofficial compact to the Moon Mother. And she’d answered.
I opened my eyes, staring at the rose. It had been a long journey, yes, and dangerous, but I had been truthful. I had never regretted it. Not once. As I gently replaced the rose into the book and placed it back on the shelf, a chime rang, alerting me that the Whispering Mirror had activated.
Sliding onto the chair in front of the table, I whispered the password that opened up the mirror and waited. A moment later, the mirror swirled with mist and then cleared, and I could see my father, staring out of the mirror at me. Behind him, stood Trenyth, looking through a sheaf of papers.
I caught my breath. I hadn’t actually spoken to my father since we’d been in Otherworld for Menolly’s wedding. At least we were on speaking terms again, and so far he’d shown nothing but remorse for treating me like dirt. I wasn’t holding my breath—Sephreh could change his mind at any time—but I was giving him a second chance.
“Camille, good evening. ” He was always formal, always the soldier, even though I knew he cared. But sometimes his training as a guardsman overshadowed his role as our father.
“Father. Is anything wrong?” Yeah, I’d inherited his bluntness.
He leaned forward. “We have news on several fronts. I’ll let Trenyth speak to you first—his news is the most urgent. ” Without another word, he slid out of his chair and Trenyth, nodding to him, sat down.
“Trenyth, what’s going on?” I didn’t like the look on the advisor’s face. Trenyth was the advisor to Queen Asteria, and he probably knew more about what was going on with the demonic war than anybody. “Should I get the others?”
“Just take good notes. We don’t have a lot of time, and I’d rather not waste it by waiting for them to join you. ”
I grabbed the voice recorder I kept in a docking bay near the mirror. At first we’d jotted down notes when talking, but this preserved more of the information, and Delilah transcribed them onto her computer. I tested it, then turned it on and set it near the mirror.
“Speak up, if you would. Go ahead. I’m ready. ”
Trenyth gave me a bare nod. “Good. Darynal’s group has managed to infiltrate Rhellah. Quall hasn’t approached his father yet, because we’re unsure how that might go, but Taath has joined up with a new guild down there. ”
“Do I even want to know what the guild is?”
“Probably not, but you have to. It’s a guild that Telazhar has started—the Guild of the Flame Serpents. It’s a sorcerer’s guild, and it’s aligned with the temple of Chimaras. And from what Taath has seen so far, they are planning an assault on Ceredream. They’re planning to march through the Southern Wastes, gathering up as much of the rogue magic as they can, and first take Ceredream, then move north and northeast. ”
“The Moon Mother’s Grove. ”
“We don’t know that for sure—I believe they are far more focused on Elqaneve because of the spirit seals. Telazhar seems to know they’re here, in Otherworld, and he seems to have an idea of where they’re being hidden. ”
Trenyth’s face looked so despondent that I wanted to reach through the mirror and give him a long hug, but even if I could, it wouldn’t do any good. Hugs were Band-Aids at this point.
“Okay, then. What’s Darynal’s group doing about it?”
Trenyth stared at me, then shook his head. “Doing about it? There’s nothing they can do about it. Taath has caught sight of Telazhar, but he can’t get near enough to dare staging an assassination. What they are doing is feeding us information. We are debating on how to approach the leaders of Ceredream to discuss this—the city has no real love for the elves and is home to a lot of rogues and sorcerers who might have found their way into the court. We are, however, now aligned with King Vodox of Svartalfheim, and the dwarves have come around. The kingdom of Nebelvuouri is our ally. ”
“Well, that’s something, at least. And we have Y’Elestrial on our side. ”
Another pause, and then Trenyth held up a piece of paper on which I could see some faintly written decree. I couldn’t read it, but I could make out the official seal of Y’Elestrial.
“One more thing. Queen Asteria and Queen Tanaquar have agreed to send your father to Aladril, to speak to the seers and see if they can help. He leaves in the morning. ”
That was a surprise. Dropping in on Aladril was no small feat, and to dare ask them for help meant that both queens felt the impending war might not go their way. I shot a glance at my father, who was standing, arms behind his back, in typical guardsman stance.
“So, that is our news. Taath says the sorcerers are creating magical weapons—spells, charms of all sorts, anything they can to do as much damage as possible. And they are attempting to harness the magic of the sands—dangerous, unpredictable…”