Heaven's Orphans
An Untold Story
By Austin J. Hepworth.
Copyright 2017. All Rights Reserved.
Published by Faith. Family. Freedom.
Chapter 1
"Goodbye Avalee!" I said with excitement. "My time here is done. I've been waiting sooo long for my chance to go to Earth, and I can't believe it is finally my turn to go." Avalee smiled at me in response, but looked away as a tear reached her eye.
"I hate these moments" Avalee finally said. "I've said goodbye to so many people, and I still have to watch so many others before it is my time to go to Earth. I have a hard time believing things will actually work out as planned."
Attempting to contain my excitement in order to try and console my friend and future daughter, I said "I know how it feels. I've said goodbye to so many too, so many that I don't yet know how their journey on Earth ends."
"You've never been left alone though" Avalee said in response as her voice broke down. "You are the last person I have. Nobody else cares about me in any meaningful way."
"You'll always be with me though Avalee. Remember - because I get to be your mother on Earth, we exchanged our heartstrands. A piece of me will be with you, and a piece of you with me. It will only be a few years before you get to come and be with me. Just stay strong. You will make it a little longer."
Avalee looked at me in sadness, but with a glimmer of hope in her eyes. "You promise that you will have me?" she asked me.
"Of course" I replied. "You mean the world to me. I promise. I promise. I promise" I said as I threw my arms around her. "I would want nothing more than to be your mother, just like my mother promised to have me, and now she is living up to that promise." I squeezed her tight, and with that, it was my time to go to Encovia, the transition tunnel to Earth.
Chapter 2
I arrived at Encovia full of excitement bubbling out of me. I could never contain my emotions well, and today was no different. Of course, those at the gates of Encovia were accustomed to seeing excitement like mine, but others tried to maintain a little more composure than I did. There was a small crowd of people at the gates, all people that were also getting ready to enter the transition tunnel to Earth.
While I did not know exactly what the tunnel was like, I knew that it was often a nine-month journey, at least so far as time on Earth went, although some people completed it faster. As the physical body developed, each piece of the spirit body attached one at a time to the developing physical body. The final connection did not happen until the so-called "Breath of Life," the moment when you had to breath on your own on the Earth.
Of course, there were many trainings to even get to this point. Transitioning to a new body always required a transition tunnel, one where you could connect piece by piece. Leaving a body seemed to be much easier, as people often talked of others dying quickly, far more quickly than the nine months in the transition tunnel. Luckily though the transition process was not too difficult, just attach each spiritual piece as the physical piece developed.
"Remember, the heartstrand piece is the first piece to connect to each parent" the guide was saying at the entrance to the tunnel. I was too excited to listen too well, but I tried. The guide was going on with more instructions, but I was certain I knew it all. I had been preparing for my moment to come, and knew that I could handle the transition process. All I could think of was getting to be with my mother finally.
Mother. I loved calling her that. She was everything I loved in a person. Beautiful, smart, fun, caring, and most of all, she was my best friend. Others were always jealous that she would be my mother. They never told me that, of course, but I'm certain that they had to be because, well because, she was too awesome for others not to be jealous of me. Life on Earth would be great with her, and I began imagining again, for my millionth time probably, all of the neat times we would have together.
I snapped out of my thoughts as the small crowd started moving. The guide had finished and was now letting people through the gate of Encovia as their moment of conception arrived. It was all I could do to wait the short moments for my turn to arrive. Everything stood still and seemed to stretch on for an eternity as my impatience ran high.
Eventually, what seemed like forever ran its course, and I was next in line, next to step through the gate. As I went to step through, the guide put out his hand and said "Wait. You haven't yet released your anchor piece. You have to let go of your anchor piece connecting you to this world before you can enter Encovia." Then, with an almost ominous tone that, for reasons I could not identify, quelled my level of excitement significantly, he continued "Once you let go of your anchor piece, you can never return to this world."
Chapter 3
Encovia was amazing. It was serene, beautiful, exciting, scary, ominous and everything in between, all at the same time. I had never experienced such a range and pull of emotions. Of course, I had been told this would happen, that I would be allowed to experience things I had never before imagined possible. I was still surprised though at the depth of the emotions, and I had only connected my heartstrand so far. I still had the rest of me to connect as my body developed past the round egg it was now.
There were many, many others in Encovia, and the tunnel seemed to stretch on for as far as I could see. All of us there were full of emotions, causing some to be solemn, others to be exuberant, and the rest somewhere in between. Most were communicating excitedly, with each proudly announcing as they were able to connect another spiritual part to their physical body that was developing.
"Anne!" I said with excitement as I saw one of my good friends from long ago. "I didn't know you were being born at this time!"
"Yes," she said with a smile, "I wasn't supposed to be born for a few Earth years yet, but my mom and dad couldn't wait that long I guess. Luckily, I was ahead in my preparations, so coming a little early wasn't a problem for me."
"Oh" I responded with a light-hearted laugh. "It's a good thing you were prepared ahead of time. My parents are having me at the exact time we planned, just as I would have expected them to. My mother is very responsible that way."
I was upset to see Anne roll her eyes at this, and went on to talk to others. I watched and laughed as people would compete to see who could make their physical body move the most with their limited connections so far. As we moved through the tunnel, the feeling inside became light and electrifying as more and more spiritual pieces were attached to the physical body developing.
While moving through the tunnel kept me quite preoccupied, I had a growing desire to find Anne again. Even though I was upset that she wasn't as proud of my mother as I was, I still liked Anne a lot. I was growing more concerned the more I looked for her, as she simply wasn't anywhere to be found. Nobody had seen her or knew where she was. While there were a lot of people in the tunnel, there were not enough people to make it impossible to find someone I had known so well. For some reason, Anne seemed to have disappeared, and her disappearance was weighing me down, even amidst the joviality of the others in the tunnel.
Chapter 4
The halfway point! I nearly screamed in excitement as I passed the location marking the halfway point in Encovia. Things were going so well. I was a perfect fit for my developing body, and each of my spiritual pieces attached so smoothly with no problems. I was just certain that my life on Earth would be the same.
I was so excited at this point as well, because I had seen that mother could sense me inside of her now. I had worked for so long to be able to move my developing physical body, and I had finally moved it hard enough for mother to feel it. I wanted to tell her so many things, tell her all about how great our time would be together, tell her about how much I adored her, tell her, well, just everything.
As I couldn't talk directly to her though, I tried as hard as I could to move my physical body. The legs were the easiest to move, so I would resort to those, hoping that each kick of the leg would send her the message I was thinking at the time. Others were like me, wanting to let their mother know just how excited they were. I was certain that mother understood my kicks, as it was obvious she could feel and sense that I was inside her.
As the move through the tunnel continued, I could no longer see the halfway point. If I hadn't lost track of Earth time, I was approaching 24 weeks of pregnancy for my mother. That meant only 16 more to go I thought with a smile. As the 24th week approached, the emotion center in my physical body fully developed, making it possible for me to attach my spiritual emotion center to my developing physical body.
I gasped at the rush of emotions and the extent of the height and depth the emotions reached as I connected the emotion centers. The physical body truly made it possible to feel and experience so much more, and I became still as I sat experiencing the rush and coursing of the emotions and feelings I had never before experienced. The emotions were more than I could handle, and I found myself becoming more still by the minute, more than I had ever thought possible for myself.
For some reason, my stillness suddenly felt dangerous. I struggled to move my physical body, but things weren't responding as they used to, even just moments ago. Panic began to well from deep within me. Pain, a feeling entirely new to me, but one readily recognizable from its description, suddenly shot through me, splitting me through to the core.
Gasping in desperation, I tried to scream, but everything was silent and growing very dark. The emotions from my physical body were entirely overwhelming and shutting down my spiritual body. As the pain grew in intensity, I became more frozen, more scared, and more full of darkness. The only power I had left at this point was to sob uncontrollably until the pain spiked and all went dark and still.
Chapter 5
I don't know how long I remained in darkness, and it is not a period I have the personal power to reflect on. I just know at some point, somebody was moving me. I could sense Anne, as well as others. There was nothing to indicate to me where I was though, and I felt entirely lost and alone. If this was Earth, I had no desire to be here now.
Eventually, I opened my eyes. That didn't help much as darkness rolled through everywhere I looked. I could see faint outlines of people as traces of light emanated from them. "The light should be so much brighter" I thought. "What has happened to everyone?" I looked around wildly, trying to find the light I was so accustomed to, but found nothing like I was used to from before Encovia.
Nobody was speaking or communicating in any way other than echoing the pain and darkness all around. I didn't dare break the silence, as I somehow knew now was not the time to talk. I tried to examine myself, but found this to be an impossible task since I seemed to be missing important pieces of myself.
At length, some light finally broke through the darkness. I, along with some of the others around me, looked up to see individuals approaching who were full of light still. Others around me did not look up though, and as the individuals full of light drew closer, I gasped as I saw that these others who had not looked up had holes for eyes. They were entirely without eyes, and were entirely blind.
As the light increased as the individuals came closer still, I was horrified to see that significant parts of the individuals around me were missing. Instinctively, I reached up and discovered that my head, along with other body parts, had significant holes and pieces missing. Terror racked me at that point, and I began to break down, losing all control of myself.
One of the beings full of light reached out and embraced me. I melted in her arms, and sobbed uncontrollably for quite some time. I had no idea who she was, but at that point it didn't matter, as I had no idea who or where I was either.
I have no idea how long she held me then. I couldn't handle the reality of my situation, or of the others around me, and so I sat, still and frozen, hoping that everything would end and I would find myself in Encovia again, soon to be in my mother's arms.
At length, my curiosity overcame everything else, and I asked, with great hesitation and in a broken, faltering voice "Where am I?"
The woman holding me squeezed me tighter before responding. "It has an actual name, but most everyone here calls this" she said quietly "'the Abyss', or 'Bottomless Pit'. It is located outside Encovia - outside the actual transition tunnel - and between the world you left and Earth." Pausing for a moment while taking a deep breath, she continued "It is where the spirits aborted by their mothers are left after their physical bodies are destroyed."
Chapter 6
Aborted?! I had no ability to comprehend it. Something must be wrong, so wrong. My mother, she loved me before going to Earth. She knew I was in her. I was telling her daily just how excited I was to see her again. How could she not want? me? How could? how could? I lost all ability to think. I simply couldn't believe it.
I cried and cried. My world, my hopes, and my dreams were shattered. The light inside me was gone. Each spiritual piece I had connected to my developing body was ripped out of me and lost, including my heartstrand, the one I had exchanged with my mother in an act of complete and open trust.
Others around me, of course, were experiencing the same thing I was. There was absolutely no betrayal so great as being aborted by one's own mother. The others around me had different levels of loss of spiritual parts though, depending on how far they had developed before being aborted. Those aborted shortly after conception were the best off, at least as far as loss of parts was concerned, while those aborted later than me had very little of their spiritual body remaining. Many had lost their eyes, making them spiritually blind, while others like me lost emotion centers and other critical parts.
Since no spirit fully connects until the 'Breath of Life', there is always a piece remaining, along with the spirit's individual essence, for the spirits aborted. The Abyss though - so called due to the never-ending darkness and boundless suffering and betrayal of those present here - was a horrible place, as each spirit was incomplete and missing parts. It was all anyone could do to witness the extent of the spiritual carnage present.
With the passing of time, I learned that if a physical body dies, in essence, with any spiritual parts attached to it, the attached parts go on to Yuli, the Spirit World following the existence on Earth. However, the unattached parts are unable to follow through, and get thrown out, for lack of a better phrase, from Encovia and left between Earth and the pre-mortal World, unable to go to Earth without a body, but unable to return to the pre-mortal World due to having released the anchor piece.
After some time of processing my situation, it finally occurred to me to ask the woman, who had stayed with me and a few others, how she was not missing parts like the rest of us were. I suddenly realized that the entire group of people I saw come to us were not missing parts, making them full of light.
"Those of us who are not missing any pieces" she gently responded, "are those of us who were miscarried or stillborn. God asked us," she said as a tear reached her eye, "to give up our time with our mothers and families on Earth, and come instead to be with you. When we entered Encovia, we knew we would never complete the journey to Earth, and we were trained to not permanently connect any of our spiritual pieces to our developing bodies.
"We had to form some temporary connections," she continued, "to allow our bodies to grow and develop, and so there was some pain for us as well when we pulled away from our bodies, and we each had to choose one piece that was permanently connected and lost. In other words, each of us gave up a piece of ourselves in order to be here with you, but we kept the rest so that we were better able to help you heal and recover."
Chapter 7
I stared at her in amazement. I couldn't even fathom giving up my mother, or family, to be stuck in this place. Her words seemed so impossible to me.
She sm
iled kindly at me, understanding what I was thinking. "I won't lie" she said. "I loved my mother and it meant everything to me to be with her. A little before my time came to come down, an Angel came to me, and" she said as tears filled her eyes "showed me you, along with the millions of others ripped apart and abandoned here. He asked me if I would come instead to be with you and a few others.
"My heart simply broke to see all of you here. I had no power to follow my own desires anymore, as I knew that you and the others are just as important as I was." As she fought back more tears, she continued, "My poor mother, of course, is entirely heartbroken. I developed all of the way to a few days before birth. My mother had picked out my name, my clothes, prepared my room, and had rearranged her entire life to be with me. But then I didn't come, and she doesn't understand" she said as her voice trailed off to silence.
"Why would you stay and develop nearly the entire gestational period with your mother? Why not just enter Encovia and then leave quickly?" I asked, still not fully processing everything she was saying.
"We're asked to depart Encovia at different times" she responded, "so that we can reach people aborted at all different stages of development. While everyone ends up at the same place, in the Abyss here, most have to be brought here from where they left Encovia. The only way to have access to a certain point in Encovia is to have left Encovia at that point. In other words, I can be there to reach those aborted right before they are born, and I can be in the general area here where everyone is brought, but I can't be there to help those aborted earlier reach the general area here. Others who were miscarried at the same stage in development can reach them though."
I still entirely could not grasp that I had been aborted. The shock was just too much for me to process. There was no way for me to believe my mother would intentionally destroy me as I was developing inside her. I thought back with sadness to everything we had, to all the hopes, dreams, and moments we had shared together - to the eternities we had spent laughing together and by each other's side.