‘I don’t want you to worry about your uniform,’ Dawn says. ‘I have that under control, and I’ve organised a new set of textbooks from the library for you. I’ll pick them up when I go into town tomorrow.’
I poke my fork into a juicy zucchini. ‘You guys do so much for me, like this amazing vegetarian meal when I know none of you is vegetarian, and taking me into your home, and now the uniforms and books, I really appreciate everything, but if I’m going to be staying here –’ I glance up and meet each set of eyes briefly – ‘I don’t want anyone putting themselves out or going to extra trouble on my behalf.’
‘You’re no trouble at all,’ Dawn says. ‘We’re just glad you’re taking up our offer to live here. Your own room upstairs will be ready in a few days. It just needs a little tweaking.’
They all look so pleased I’m staying that tears spring to my eyes. Amber runs around the dining table and hugs me. I hug her back. But she stiffens suddenly, her fingers curling tentatively over the strange growths. For the first time since I noticed them a few weeks ago, I’d forgotten the thickening bumps on my shoulders.
‘Ebony!’ She pulls away and takes several steps back, her hand flying to cover her open mouth, which she promptly drops to yell, ‘What’s with your back? Did you get hurt during the fire?’
Dawn glances at Reuben across the table. ‘Amber, what are you talking about?’
‘Before you turned up, the upstairs windows blew out and –’ she stops addressing her dad and looks at me – ‘we hit the ground pretty hard, remember?’
‘I remember you hit it harder!’ I try to make light of her concern, but now Dawn and Reuben are exchanging worried glances, and I wish I could slide under the table and disappear.
‘Don’t forget how you came hurtling out of the kitchen,’ she adds. ‘Did you hurt yourself in there?’
My face fills with heat and my cheeks start burning. How could I have forgotten? What a stupid, stupid mistake!
But, now I think about her reaction, why is it so intense? Have the bumps grown larger suddenly? They’ve been tingly today, but since the fire I haven’t thought about them much.
‘Ebony, please let Mum take a look.’
‘There’s no need. I’m fine, Amber.’ I turn and sit and pretend to eat, willing her with my eyes to do the same. ‘We shouldn’t let this lovely meal go cold.’
Reluctantly Amber walks back to her seat and pokes at her meal.
I attempt to change the subject. ‘I want to talk to you about photocopying your physics notes before Tuesday. That’s one class I don’t want to fall behind in.’
‘Of course, no problem. We’ll do that tomorrow.’ Her voice lowers, and she says, ‘But, Ebony, your shoulder blades felt … l-lumpy.’
My heart cries out to her as soon as I hear the tremor in her voice.
She croaks softly, ‘Lumps could mean, you know … a tumour or something.’
Dawn closes her fingers around her daughter’s arm. ‘Darling, in the last two weeks, except for Shadow, Ebony has lost everything she owns; let’s give her a little break over dinner.’
I don’t even know what a tumour feels like. I really need to take a look now. ‘Um, you know, I do remember falling off Blueboy, one of the geldings Dad was training just before the fire. A python shot out in front of us and Blueboy baulked. I came off and must have grazed my shoulders, but it hardly hurt and I forgot all about it.’
Finally Amber calms down. ‘Mum should definitely still look at it in case the wounds are infected.’
‘No! I mean, jeez, Amber, it didn’t even break the skin.’ I dredge up a smile. ‘It’s nothing, really, but I’ll check it out myself after dinner. OK?’
Reuben pats his daughter’s hand. ‘We’ve all had a lot on our minds recently; it’s easy to jump to conclusions.’ He smiles at her sweetly. ‘I’m sure Ebony would know whether or not she needs medical attention.’
Dawn smiles in that sad way she has just for me now. ‘I’m here if you need me, darling.’
We settle back at the table and, while I make an effort to eat Dawn’s lovely meal, I don’t seem able to swallow anything larger than a pea. It’s a relief when dinner is over and I excuse myself from having dessert and practically run down the hallway to Amber’s room. As soon as I’m in her bathroom, I pull off her brother’s clothes and turn my back to the mirror.
‘Oh! What?’ They’ve grown so much bigger! But what exactly am I looking at? I stretch my arms over my back and run my fingers across the growths. They feel leathery at the base and squishy at the top. A fibre of sorts comes away in my hand. I examine it under the light. It’s a white feather. A feather? A soft downy feather!
How can that come out of me?
I flex my shoulders, the feathers move, and I freeze.
A primordial urge reminds me to breathe and I gulp in a deep breath. My fingers tingle, but I ignore them. I’ve hyperventilated before. Forcing myself to breathe more slowly, I lift my eyes to my reflection. A scared person looks back with violet irises almost entirely absorbed by black pupils.
The room suddenly spins. I grab hold of the basin just as the floor begins to rumble. The vibrations quickly move to the walls. Bottles, tubes, Amber’s toothbrush, just about everything sitting on a shelf or not fixed to a wall starts to shake. I latch on to the towel rail for more support. ‘What’s happening?’ I ask myself and, while looking into my reflection, concentrate on slowing down my breathing because I know it’s important not to pass out.
OK, something is happening to me that I don’t understand. I close my eyes and continue monitoring my breathing, keeping it slow. Losing control will get me nowhere.
The shelves and everything on them stop rattling. I look around the room; everything appears normal with nothing broken. I move a few items back into their positions.
OK, whatever that was, it’s over. I glance into my reflection. Even my eyes have returned to normal. The wide-pupil stare is gone, and I sigh.
I angle my body like a contortionist to take one last look at my shoulders. The feathers are still there.
Revolted, I slide to the floor, hug my knees to my chest and try to figure out how I’m going to fix this. I wonder what would happen if I pulled them out? Maybe I should simply cut them off as if I were having a haircut. Or shave them off with a razor?
What if they grow back thicker?
What am I thinking? What if I cut them off and they can’t stop bleeding?
‘How can I stay here now?’ I whisper to myself, feeling enormous sadness bearing down on my heart.
I take a deep breath and wipe away the self-defeating tears.
I have to go and see the man who claims to be my uncle. Maybe these things are hereditary and he can tell me about them. Some reassurance that I don’t belong in a carnival sideshow right now would be welcome.
The light rapping on the bathroom door doesn’t register, but Amber’s startled cry when she opens it and sees me huddled on her bathroom floor does.
‘Oh my God, Ebony. Oh my God! Look at your back!’
I look up. ‘That’s what I’ve been doing for the last twenty minutes.’
‘I’ll get Mum!’
I grab her ankle and slam the bathroom door shut with my other hand. ‘Don’t do that, Amber.’
‘But … Ebony, have you seen your back? Have you seen those … those –’
‘Feathers, I believe, is the word you’re trying to say.’
She seems put out suddenly. ‘How can you be so calm?’
I get to my feet, slide into a towelling robe and point to my face. ‘Do I look calm?’
She takes in my swollen red eyes and trembling mouth and yanks me into her arms. She holds me tight until my renewed sobbing eases a few minutes later.
We sit on her bed and I explain how I noticed small brown spots a few weeks ago, and how they’ve been growing steadily ever since. I also tell her how different I feel from everyone, how I can do stuff that just isn’t normal.
She
stares at me with her mouth open. ‘Ebony, you need a doctor.’
‘Do you believe me, Amber?’
She looks straight into my eyes. ‘Every word.’
‘Then why do you want me to see a doctor?’
‘Not that kind of doctor! I mean a skin doctor.’
I swallow around the lump in my throat. It helps stop tears from flowing again. ‘Amber, I can’t see any kind of doctor, at least not yet.’
‘Why not?’
‘They’ll want to write me up in a medical journal. There’ll be endless tests and experiments. I’ll have no life, no privacy. A regular doctor isn’t the answer for me. One of the conditions of the adoption was that I never see a doctor. Mr Zavier told my parents I wouldn’t need one, and so far I haven’t. I don’t get sick. If I cut myself …’ I stop, remembering another time when my wounds healed fast. ‘Or my face came too close to a flame …’
‘You heal faster than other people do,’ she says. ‘Well, sweetie, you’re sick now. You have feathers growing out of –’
‘Jeez, Amber, I know!’
She looks down at her hands. ‘I’m sorry, but they’re not just going to disappear, are they?’
‘No, and I’m sorry. You don’t have anything to be sorry about.’ I shake my head. ‘I need answers. I need information on my biological family – who my mother was, and especially my father.’
‘I’ll help you find them.’
‘Thank you.’ I smile at Amber with tears welling. ‘Maybe I shouldn’t go back to school yet. Maybe I should leave the area.’
‘And what good would that do?’
‘But if anyone sees these …’
‘No one has to. It’ll be our secret.’
‘You won’t tell your mum or dad?’
‘I promise.’
‘Or the girls at school?’
‘No way! We’ll work out what these things on your back are, even if we have to research every medical database in the world.’
I nod.
‘You have to find out who you are,’ she declares. ‘And I’m going to help you.’
‘Actually, Amber, I have to find out what I am.’
25
Jordan
On Monday, after training from five in the morning until four in the afternoon, Thane is so pleased with my efforts he gives me a driving lesson in the Lambo.
It doesn’t take long before I’m cruising the quiet mountain backstreets. On the way home my stomach growls. ‘You know, I could do with some real food for a change.’
He shakes his head as if he can’t believe I eat so much.
‘Dude, school’s back tomorrow.’
‘I’m not sure what that has to do with eating,’ he says, but he directs me into a reverse park in front of a Chinese restaurant.
On the same side but a few doors down is a small park with a toilet block at the rear. ‘I just have to duck in there for a minute. I won’t be long.’
I jog to the men’s room and just as I’m zipping my fly back up a cold bare arm swings around my neck. ‘You gotta be kidding.’ At the same time the tip of a sharp blade pushes against my back. ‘Mate, if you don’t let me go, well … suffice to say, it’s not going to be your lucky day cos when we step outside …’
He growls low and deep and with a rumble like I’m irritating him! ‘Dude, if it’s money you’re after, you can pull the wallet out of my back pocket.’
‘Shut up, Blake, and listen. This is what we’re going to do.’
‘Skinner! Haven’t the cops caught up with you yet?’
‘I said shut up! And yeah, thanks for tipping them off; they’re all over the mountain now.’
‘I’m not alone, you know. If you keep me here too long, my, um, friend is going to come searching for me, and mate, you do not want to rile this guy up.’
‘If you don’t shut up, I’m going to ram this knife into your spine and finish the job I started two weeks ago.’
‘What do you want? How much? There’s enough in my wallet to keep you going for a few days. Take it. Just let me go and I won’t tell a soul I saw you, I promise.’
‘I don’t remember you ever talking so much. I’m only going to tell you one more time to shut up or I will stick you with this knife. Understand?’
‘If it’s not money, what then?’
He groans, hooks his foot around the leg of a stool standing in the corner with a wastepaper basket on top, drags it over and makes me sit. Keeping one hand pressed down on my shoulder, he shifts the blade from my back to the right side of my neck. ‘You dobbed me in!’
‘You tried to kill me!’ While I keep him talking, I try to suss out his strength. He probably hasn’t been working out lately, while I have. What are my chances of wrenching that knife from his hand?
‘Yeah, well, I’ve been thinking that maybe you were telling the truth that night.’
‘You’re timing is off, mate, but why the change of heart?’
He shrugs. ‘Hiding out up here I’ve had time to think. Anyway, you don’t look too badly injured.’
‘I died.’
I see his face in the mirror. His eyes bug out. ‘Watching you with Sophie made me so furious I wanted to kill you, but … Man, you’re kidding me, you really died?’
‘On the operating table.’
‘You recovered quickly. I saw you run in here.’
‘He had a little help from me,’ Thane says, shoving the door open and breaking the lock in the process.
Skinner frowns but doesn’t look too worried … yet. ‘Who are you?’
‘I’m the one who dobbed you in.’
‘You a cop?’
Thane pats his jacket pockets with open palms. ‘I’m not the police, Adam, and I’m not carrying a weapon. My name is Nathaneal, and you can think of me as Jordan’s bodyguard.’
He doesn’t believe him for a second and laughs so hard he takes his eyes off Thane. ‘That’s cute, Blake. Did you really think I would fall for that?’ It’s only for a second but it’s a mistake he’s going to regret. ‘You buy your clothes from charity shops and live in a shelter for losers! Do you really expect me to –’
Thane reappears behind him. ‘What were you saying, Adam?’
‘Hey … ! How did you do that?’
The surprise works like a dream. As Skinner turns his head towards his voice, Thane snatches the knife from his hand, puts it into his back pocket while suspending him a foot-length off the floor with his other hand around his neck. ‘What would you like me to do with him, Jordan?’
‘What are my options?’
‘Let’s see.’ He pauses for effect. ‘I believe you have two.’
‘Uh-huh?’
‘The first is to break his neck and leave him here to be found, eventually.’
‘What? No! Please, no!’ Skinner pleads. ‘W-what’s the second option?’
Thane has no trouble keeping a straight face, but I have to glance away.
‘The second option is to call the police, maintaining this position until they arrive.’
‘No, don’t do that, I’ll suffocate! Jordan, tell him I can’t breathe! There must be a third option. Listen, man, I can’t get caught. If I go to jail, it’ll kill my mother. She’s been through so much already. It’s enough I’ve made a mess of my life, but Mum has already lost one son.’ Glaring at me, he says, ‘Thanks to him. He ruined our family.’ He shifts his eyes back to Thane. ‘Don’t let this freak be the reason she loses another son.’
For a heartbeat there is only silence. ‘Let him go, Thane.’
But he doesn’t. ‘Jordan, how can I release Adam when his heart is filled with anger and hatred? Have you ever thought perhaps it isn’t all directed at you?’
Skinner mutters, ‘Who is this guy?’
‘Jordan, I want you to think about what happened that day.’
‘I already told you everything.’
Skinner tries to break free but groans at the futility of even trying. ‘I don’t know who you are, but do
n’t listen to Blake’s lies. I can tell you exactly how it went down that day. The water kept rising around us so fast it formed a whirlpool. He got himself out first and tied the only rope we had left around a tree. When he returned, Seth was on one side and I was on the other of a wide tunnel and the water was coming in fast.’
He tries again to squirm out of Thane’s hold, but finally seems to accept the futility of his efforts. ‘Did he explain how the waters rose so fast there was only time to save one of us? And even though I was screaming at him to save Seth, he threw the rope to me? To me!’
‘Which you took gratefully, of course,’ Thane suggests in his placid voice. ‘What would have been the point of both of you dying and leaving your mother with no children?’
‘Exactly! I had no choice but to accept the rope. The water was already up to my chest.’
‘And where was the water up to on Seth?’ Thane asks.
He doesn’t answer. I see his lips press together like he’s trying to keep words in. ‘It was up to his neck,’ he says, closing his eyes. When he opens them, he seems to have his energy for lying back. ‘That’s why I got angry. I could easily have hung on until he’d pulled Seth out. I was twice Seth’s size and I could … swim.’
Still holding Skinner up by the throat with his legs dangling in the air, but somehow not causing him any harm, Thane looks at me and asks, ‘Is that how it happened, Jordan?’
I glance up at Skinner. ‘He adored you. You were his superhero.’ Skinner’s eyes close tight as if he’s trying to block out an image that won’t go away.
‘We got to a dead end. It was odd, coming across a wall like that with a bolted door. We knew from the old library maps that this tunnel went all the way to a pond where the last of the big hauls of gold had come from. Adam kicked the door in frustration. That’s where he wanted to go. Some dust fell on our heads and Seth freaked out, but the door moved on its rusted hinges and Adam got inspired.’
I take a deep breath as the memories keep rolling and I see Seth’s scared eyes and feel his fingers digging into my arms.
‘Did the door give out eventually, Jordan?’ Thane asks.