“Like what? What would they say?”
Gavin wrinkled his nose as he searched for a parking space. “I don’t know. Like if you’re…hot or something. God, I don’t know. Gross.”
Gemma threw her head back and laughed at his discomfort. “Don’t you have any female friends then? Cheerleaders? I just need someone to guide me around my first day.”
“You don’t need that, Gemma. Stop freaking out.”
“I’m not freaking out!” she insisted, spinning her bracelet rapidly around her wrist, over and over.
“Then what the hell are you doing that for?”
Gemma stopped playing with the bracelet. “I’m just not you. I don’t play a sport. I can’t fit in immediately.” She quietly took in a deep breath and released it as silently as she could so Gavin wouldn’t make fun. “I mean, I’ve never been to a real school and been around…real high schoolers.”
“Stop acting like you’re a caveman or something.”
Gemma squinted at her brother. “Are you calling me a caveman to add to my current insecurity?” she joked.
“Shut up. You’ll be fine.”
She sighed and crossed her arms. “I think you’re just too lazy to introduce me.”
“Kind of. But I’m also being honest when I say that I just hang with the guys on the team.”
“How about Lucas?”
Gavin turned smoothly into a tight space and creased his forehead as he adjusted his parking job. “How do you know Lucas?”
“Oh,” Gemma swallowed. His name had been on the tip of her tongue all weekend. She hadn’t realized just how desperate she was to say it aloud. “I met him at the lake house when he was helping Aunt Mira measure her porch. He said he knew you.”
“Yeah, he’s on the team too.”
“Really?” Gemma brightened, sounding much more excited than she meant to. Gavin shot her a quizzical look. “I mean… I guessed that he might be. It looks like he’d play basketball. That’s all. He’s tall.”
Gemma quickly turned her face to the window so Gavin wouldn’t see her blush. She brushed her fingers through her hair, which she had blown out straight the way Armand taught her. It wasn’t perfect, but it was close enough.
The hours spent mulling over a first day outfit came down to the decision of simplicity combined with good accessories. She didn’t want to appear as if she were flaunting – she couldn’t think of a quicker way to get on girls’ bad sides. On top, she wore a vintage camel-colored leather jacket over an ivory silk T-shirt. The neckline dipped just low enough to show some pushed-up cleavage. As much as I can get from a small B cup, Gemma thought with a shrug. Paired with her fitted jeans were suede, slightly over-the-knee boots. She had wondered if they would be too sexy for the first day, but determined that the rest of her outfit was tame enough for it to be permissible. She still didn’t quite look the way she had imagined, but she felt just about as confident as she could.
Gemma exited the car, swinging her tote bag over her shoulder. “Alright, well… I guess I’m going in.” She looked at Gavin expectantly for moral support. He heaved a sigh, running his hands through his dirty blonde hair with exasperation.
“I’m not worried about you. You’re going to be fine.”
She smiled, knowing he was exhausting his kindness on her. “You can say that because you jumped into a new school halfway through the year and still ended up popular.”
“Can’t help it,” Gavin smirked, pulling her close to put her in a headlock.
“Gavin, my hair! Please don’t.”
“Relax, I’m not giving you a noogie,” he laughed. His smile then faded slightly as his twinkling eyes gave Gemma a rare serious look. “If anyone knows what popular is, it’s Queen Bee. It’s not like she disappeared into thin air,” he reasoned. He grinned again. “Just because she can’t be Queen here doesn’t mean she can’t bring her swagga.”
Gemma snorted as they neared the school’s front entrance. “Did you just say ‘swagga?’”
“Yeah,” Gavin pretended to kick her in the butt. “Now get away from me and go make some friends.”
~
Gavin’s words carried her confidently through the first half of the school day. Along the way, she had friendly exchanges with some classmates and noticed she was even being looked at – checked out, really – by more than a couple of boys in the hall. Under normal circumstances, she would be thrilled, but none of these boys were Lucas. He was M.I.A. for the first five periods. She stayed on alert though, prepared to see him at any turn.
She prayed he would be in her lunch period. Gavin wasn’t, and Gemma could just see herself having to wander the perimeter of the cafeteria over and over as she searched for an inviting table. When her lunch period finally arrived, she was disappointed but no longer surprised to see that Lucas was nowhere in sight. She gazed at the sea of students, beginning to panic. She was suddenly aware of how long she had been standing around just looking out at the cafeteria. Several pairs of eyes began watching her. Oh God, please help a girl out here.
“Love your bag,” a voice suddenly said. Gemma turned to see a girl smiling at her, though she was not so much a girl as a bombshell. Gemma was floored. “Stella McCartney Falabella? I have it in the pale blue.”
“Oh! Yeah. Thanks!” Gemma said, admiring the girl’s radiant blonde hair. It was waist-length, stick straight and glossy. Gemma felt suddenly insecure over her less-than-perfect blowout.
The blonde side-eyed the kids who stared at them from nearby tables. “Need a place to sit?” she nodded towards a table and began strutting away in her python-embossed sandals. Gemma followed without hesitation. She tried desperately to keep her cool as they approached the row of tables against the wall by the cafeteria exit. They stood far apart from the rest of the tables in the room and were occupied by raucous jocks and pretty girls flipping through WWD magazines.
“I’m Madison,” the blonde said loudly over the tables of screaming boys in their letterman jackets. “Welcome to Jock Row – that’s what they call us in the cafeteria.” She rolled her eyes at the nickname and led Gemma up to the first table, occupied by three of the most flawless-looking girls Gemma had ever seen despite having been at various fashion weeks all over the world. “This is Jillian, Leah, and Kate.”
Jillian had similar hair as Gemma, light brown and wavy. Somehow it looked fantastic on her rather than a little boring like it did on Gemma. Leah had Madison’s stick-straight and glossy hair in black, styled sharply and falling at a chic angle at her collarbone. Kate’s hair was a strawberry blonde and framed her heart-shaped face in large, bouncy curls. The three were huddled over a plate of sushi in the middle of the table. They were all gorgeous but paled in comparison to Madison’s radiating beauty.
“I’m Gemma,” she replied, feeling at once nervous and excited. The girls smiled, glancing at the empty seat at the end of the table. Gemma hesitated.
“Were you on your way somewhere or can you grace us with your presence for a second?” Madison laughed. Gemma laughed back, though nervously, and slid into the seat. “Did you just move here?”
“Oh yeah. From Manhattan. I wanted to go to school with my brother – he’s a senior here,” Gemma replied, hoping that the name-dropping would be beneficial.
“Oh! Me and Jillian are seniors,” Madison said, her crystal blue eyes gleaming. “Who’s your brother?”
“Gavin Hunter.”
“Oh, Gavin!” The girls all burst into giggles.
“We love him,” Madison said. “Some more than others.” She eyed Leah, who blushed.
“Don’t say anything?” Leah said, turning to Gemma. Her intimidating supermodel looks softened as she pleaded with big brown eyes. Gemma laughed, feeling more at ease.
“I won’t say anything,” she reassured.
“I mean, at some point,” Leah’s plump lips turned up into a smile. “I might want you to say something. But I just need to be ready for that day – whenever it may come.”
“The day her tatas grow in,” Jillian quipped, nibbling a chocolate chip cookie.
“Excuse me, not everyone can be like you. Eating cookies and putting all the weight on in your boobs,” Leah retorted. The girls laughed and Gemma joined tentatively. Leah’s hand suddenly flew to her mouth. “Which reminds me, how rude of us – Gemma, help yourself to the sashimi! We do this every first day of school but we’re usually out for lunch otherwise.” Gemma looked down at the colorful wheel of sushi, remembering the tour she did in Asia last year and the private omakase meal she had in Tokyo with a group of girl fans who insisted on taking her out. She remembered how fresh the fish was and how perfectly melded all the flavors were, but how little she ate because of the elaborate headpiece she wore that day. It had been the last time she got to hang out with girls her own age and feel like a part of a group.
“Thanks. I’m so glad I caught you guys on your one day in the cafeteria,” Gemma said. She reached for a piece of the tuna and put it on a napkin in front of her to be polite. Her stomach was lurching with both nerves and excitement, so she couldn’t imagine eating. She watched the girls eat. Jillian and Kate popped the pieces like popcorn. Leah and Madison picked off just the fish to eat, leaving little mounds of rice all over the platter.
“Gavin’s usually too busy pranking the locker room and checking out every girl in the school except Leah,” Madison said, eyeing Leah playfully before returning her gaze to Gemma. “So if you ever need a tour guide, you’re totally welcome to come with us to our spots. I have an extra seat in my car.”
Gemma could hardly believe her luck. She smiled broadly. “Of course. I’d love to.”
~
“I can’t walk home!” Gemma hissed through her teeth as she stood outside the driver’s door of Gavin’s BMW. Students poured out of the school at the final bell and headed towards the parking lot full of Mercedes SUVs and other BMWs. “I barely know my way yet! Might I remind you that I’ve only been in Beauford for two days, you jerk!” Gemma pulled desperately at the handles of the car doors, which Gavin kept locked.
“You don’t understand. Kylie has shot me down for a solid year and today she finally wants to do something. If you saw her, you would understand that she’s not someone that you can turn down.”
“Ugh, Gavin – you’re so gross sometimes.”
“I’m not gross, I’m a guy. There’s a difference, kind of,” Gavin said. “Do you know how much shit I’d get for passing up an opportunity like this? No one says ‘no’ to Kylie Savino. Plus, there are only like, a handful of guys who can say they’ve hooked up with her post-implants.”
“And you just proved your incredible grossness,” Gemma rolled her eyes.
“Who’s being gross?”
Gemma and Gavin turned to see Madison swinging her lambskin tote over her shoulder. She walked towards them with a smirk.
“If it’s Gavin, then I’m not surprised. He’s just a gross guy in general.”
“Hah, Madison,” Gavin sneered. “Stop pretending like you didn’t think the capybara was cute.” She narrowed her eyes at him till he put his hands up in the air. “Alright, I’m really sorry that it pooped in your backpack. Not that I didn’t say that already.”
“It wasn’t just a backpack, Gavin. It was an Alexander Wang Marti.”
“Okay?” Gavin looked at her strangely as if she had begun speaking a different language.
Gemma stared at Gavin in disbelief. “Why and how do you keep getting your hands on those things?” she asked. Gavin laughed.
“So sue me, I think those big rats are cool. Have you ever seen them swim? I’m going to raise ten when I have my own place and throw them all into a pool together.”
Madison cooed. “Well that’s almost kind of endearing, only not really. Anyway, want a ride Gemma?”
“She does,” Gavin said, grinning ear to ear. “Can’t take her ‘cause I have a date with Kylie Savino.”
“Cute. Guess she’s starting her slut campaign early this year.”
“She’s not a slut, she’s just more inclined to take her clothes off than other girls,” Gavin said as he started his car. He yelled before pulling out of his spot and zooming out of the lot. “Don’t be jealous, Maddie!”
“Uck, I hate when he calls me that,” Madison said to Gemma as they walked to her car.
“Yeah, sorry about him. And I’m sorry to bother you for the ride,” Gemma said, quickly overanalyzing her words. Shut up, you’re being too polite. Just be normal.
“It’s totally not a bother, I know someone who lives near you. I was on my way there anyway.”
“Thanks so much. I would’ve totally gotten lost walking back.”
“Don’t even. I can’t believe Gavin would make you walk back in Jimmy Choos,” Madison winked at Gemma. “Been dying to buy those.”
Gemma smiled proudly as she opened the car door to Madison’s silver Range Rover. She reveled in the stares of her classmates as they no doubt wondered who the new girl hanging out with Madison was.
“I like your car,” Gemma said as she buckled her seatbelt.
Madison shrugged. “I’m cool with it,” she said breezily as she drove towards the main street. “It wasn’t my number one choice and it totally doesn’t match who I am, but my boyfriend helped me choose and he was super into it. Poor thing, I don’t think he has anything to drive when he gets his license.” She swiftly removed a pair of oversized sunglasses from a compartment and put them on without taking her eyes off the road. “I’ll just use it for now and give it to my little brother once I go to college. I won’t need a car in New York anyway.”
Madison did most of the talking during their brief ride home, but Gemma didn’t mind. It gave her a chance to fully examine Madison for flaws like a crooked tooth or stubby fingernails. As far as she could see, there were none. Madison went on about the various school events that she chaired and all the college dance programs and ballet companies that were personally courting her. Gemma would have hated her if it weren’t for the fact that Madison seemed to love her company.
Once they pulled up to Gemma’s house and parked, Madison immediately began texting on her iPhone.
“Sorry I’m being totally rude, I just need to check something,” Madison said. “I’ll see you tomorrow though.”
Gemma smiled, leaning into Madison’s glossy pout so Madison could kiss her on both cheeks. She couldn’t be more relieved about Madison’s intent to hang out with her beyond the first day.
Feeling as if she were walking on air, Gemma strolled into the empty house, tossing everything aside and heading straight for the fridge. She poured herself a glass of coconut water and smiled peacefully. It had been an incredibly successful first day of school, despite not running into Lucas. Befriending a girl like Madison was like hitting the jackpot. Besides, she had plenty of time to run into Lucas considering he played basketball with her brother.
Lost in her thoughts, she accidentally sloshed her drink onto her shirt as she closed the fridge door. “Ugh, Gemma,” she scolded herself despite the smile that still curved her lips.
She made her way up the grand flight of stairs and walked down the length of the hall. Through the circular window above the front door, she noticed that Madison’s car was still parked outside. Maybe she wants to come in and hang out, Gemma thought to herself. She continued to her bedroom to change into something more comfortable but still remotely cute, just in case Madison did decide to ring her doorbell. She settled on a striped sweater dress that reached her mid-thigh, pulling the neckline slightly off one shoulder.
Through her window, she could see movement in Lucas’s room. Leo bounced up and down on his bed, barking excitedly. Lucas was curled on the bed around him, tossing a rubber ball. Gemma smiled as she watched Leo shoot out of the room after the ball, which bounced off the bed and out the door.
Then her smile quickly faded.
Madison walked into Lucas’s open door, the rubber ball in her left hand and Leo cradled in her
right arm. She leaned over and kissed him on the lips with Leo yapping happily in between them. Gemma quickly turned away, her heart sinking. I’m an idiot. She leaned against the wall and slowly slid down against it to the floor, her cheeks absolutely burning. Her whole face burned. How could I not put two and two together?
She cursed her windows for not having curtains and slipped out of her own room as discreetly as possible. She ran down the stairs and plopped down on the living room couch, trying to normalize her heartbeat as she reasoned with herself. There was no reason to be so upset. After all, she and Lucas had only spoken once. They barely knew each other. Plus, Madison was her best chance at having not just a normal life at Beauford High, but an amazing one. An enviable one. It’s not worth torturing yourself over, she tried to convince herself. He’s your friend’s boyfriend. It’s not worth it.
~
Forgetting about Lucas proved to be easy. He was usually too busy working for his dad’s custom carpentry business to hang out with Madison and her friends. Madison often pouted and complained, but it was nothing Pinkberry and a mani-pedi couldn’t temporarily solve. The few times he did hang out with the girls, Gemma was thankful he never brought up her near-death incident at the lake. With Gemma, he usually just made small talk about Gavin’s latest troublemaking or the progress he was making on Mira’s porch.
It wasn’t until a night out in Manhattan that things began to change.
“Oh, I know this place,” Kate gasped as she struggled to walk on the cobblestone street in her braided espadrilles. “It’s opened by that guy Andrew. No Andre. He’s dating that actress.”
Leah rolled her eyes and bopped Kate on the head playfully. “Yeah, you totally know this place.”
Along with the girls, Madison had invited Lucas to a new club in the Meatpacking District. Everyone but Gemma had fake IDs, but Jillian assured Gemma that there would be no problem getting in because she was “friendly” with the cute bouncer. With a wink in Jillian’s direction, he bypassed Gemma while checking IDs.
“See, I told you. The guy loves me,” Jillian smiled as they sauntered through the doors. Gemma dared to cock a curious eyebrow at Jillian, who guffawed. “Get your mind out of the gutter, Gem! He’s totally just a family friend.” Madison snorted.