Chapter Eleven
The four of us just stood there for a moment after hearing the impossible sound. None of us needed the doorbell. My mind went to the worst of scenarios—that Lydia Shaw was behind the door.
“Paul…” Nate said. Paul nodded and went down the stairs at the same moment as Nate closed Emma in her room. Then he sprinted up to the third floor and closed me in mine. I couldn’t stay inside.
For one, I was sure if something happened it would be my fault. And if we were going to survive this, everyone should be in my room, where my enemy couldn’t get to us.
I ran down the stairs, slowing when I heard the commotion. Remi struggled with Nate to get to the door. “Get out of my way, Sparky. It’s for me,” she said.
“Why the hell would you invite someone here?” Nathan asked. “How did they get in the gate?”
“I opened it. Get over it,” she said. The doorbell rang again, and the front door opened. Whoever it was, brought a lot of noise in with him. His thoughts blasted like the kids at school, like humans, like Remi. “Liam, you’re right on time.”
“He’s not coming in this house,” Paul said.
“Hello, Remi,” the guy said, in an English accent. “Introduce me to your friends.”
“Trust me, I don’t have friends,” Remi said. Liam sized up Nathan and Paul in his mind, wondering which was the dog and which was the wizard she’d told him about. And he was … excited. Thrilled, really, to meet them, to know that Remi hadn’t made them up.
He was a hunter, the hunter who’d purged her, the guy she wanted to impress. I almost ran down there, feeling completely capable of ending this right here, right now, but I remembered I was a missing person. A missing copy.
“Come in, Liam,” Remi said. Her thoughts were loud too, telling her plan to lead him to the other two prizes upstairs. She didn’t have time to take new pictures, so she was letting him see for himself.
I thought about what would happen, and I saw it. It had been days since I’d been pulled into a vision. Whitney giving me the mask was the last one. But I was different in this vision. I didn’t curl up and take it. Not even close. I raised her hunter friend, who must be a dirty blonde with gray eyes, into the air and forced his body through a window. Blood and glass scattered on the living room floor. I stalked away from him to Remi. Fire flared from my hands, and Nate ran out of the door in a panic. Then Paul and Emma followed, leaving me alone again.
I pulled out of the misty vision and caught my breath.
I couldn’t be that person. Not if I wanted Nate to look past me being a copy. Not if I wanted to keep my other friends, too. I didn’t bother running to my room. I needed to move faster than that. I opened my eyes in front of my desk and grabbed my phone.
Sophia had stopped me before. I needed her again.
“Hello, my love,” she said after one ring.
“Sophia, I need you.”
“What’s wrong, dear?”
“I know this is going to sound weird, but I know for a fact that Remi is no longer a panther, and the person who changed her is in the house.”
The phone made a startling noise in my ear, like something was wrong with the connection.
She flashed into the room and inspected me in a panic. “I’m fine. Nate and Paul are down there.”
“Lock the door,” she said and vanished.
I sat on the floor and tucked my head between my knees. I hadn’t prayed in days, but I needed to now. I’d needed to the entire time here. This whole situation was dangerous. Everyone was at risk, especially the guy I loved.
What if something happened down there? Something I could’ve stopped by opening my mouth sooner? Something that would be my fault because I’d pissed her off? What if he was hurt? That was enough to get me up and out of the door.
And I ran. Eyes closed and fingers crossed, on my way to kill. I’d been in this dark place many times before. In the cafeteria, countless times in a classroom, and in the halls. God, the halls were the worst, people bumping me, provoking me. But those kills would’ve been selfish. This would be for all of us. This hunter had to go. This girl had to die.
I collided against a body. I opened my eyes and still couldn’t see, still raptured in the rage I’d fought so hard. But I could feel him, his arms, his hands, and Christine couldn’t help but respond to him.
“Nate,” I said. He kissed my cheek and carried me back to my room. I wrapped my entire body around him, elated to see him in one piece. “What happened? Is it over?”
“Sophia threw the guy and Remi out. Everything’s fine.” I wasn’t entirely sure, but I thought I felt Nate sniff my neck. “She was actually already packed.”
I didn’t imagine the sniff, he did it again. I unhooked my legs from his waist so I could have his full attention.
“Nate, that guy! She brought him here on purpose. That idiot!” He tightened his arms around me and kissed my cheek again.
“I wouldn’t have let anything happen. I think he was just here to pick her up,” he whispered. “She left on a motorcycle with him.”
“Did he hurt you? I swear if he did—” Nate chuckled.
“You have no idea what you’re doing right now, do you?” he mumbled.
“No. Nate, tell me more about what happened down there. What did the guy say to you?”
He kissed my neck and chuckled again. “Let me see if I can get the accent right,” he said. “‘ello there, ‘ole chap. I’m Liam. I smell like old, rotting meat. I’m ‘ere for Remi.” He laughed at his horrible impersonation of Liam—who he couldn’t know was a hunter or else he’d be panicking right now. “Sophia walked into the living room and went nuts on Remi. Now she’s gone, said she’s moving in with her new boyfriend.”
“Boyfriend? Did she say that?” He nodded against my neck, and his hands moved lower on my back.
“Are you sure he didn’t hurt you? If he did, I swear I—”
“You’re doing it again,” he whispered. “Your angry voice. You can be unbearably sexy at times. Did you know that?”
I sighed, losing my focus because he had none. “I’m not always sexy?”
One of his hands traveled up my back, all the way up to my face. “Typically, you’re adorable and sweet. But I’ve noticed that when you’re angry or your temperature hikes for … other reasons…” He kissed my neck. “You smell more like spice than cake batter.” He sniffed me a third time. “It’s unreal how great you smell then. I almost want to make you mad just to get another whiff of it.”
I smiled. That was a new take on my anger. Sexy, not murderous. I could live with that.
He kissed me, softly at first, then hard enough to rock me on my feet. Of course I kissed him back. I didn’t want to be rude, even though he was being incredibly random, drunk almost.
I pulled away and caught my breath. His eyes were on my lips. “Baby,” I said, trying to get us back on topic. He moaned and chuckled.
“That just makes it worse. Baby. Nate. Any affectionate term in your voice makes me feel … important. Loved.”
He’d won. Pulled me in. “You are important. You are loved,” I said. I let him take my breath away, making me forget I had a care in the world. I tangled my fingers in his hair. He growled, picked me up, and pressed me against the door.
Just as I wrapped my legs around his waist again, Sophia cleared her throat.
“Sophia!” I said. “We … um…” Nate put me down and stepped in front of me, like he was protecting me from her.
“I’m sorry. It’s my fault, Sophia. I promise,” Nate said. She groaned and pinched the bridge of her nose. “I broke the rules. I’m sorry. Should I pack?”
“Go to your room, Nathan. Yes, you should pack, because everyone is leaving. But right now, I need to speak with Christine alone,” she said, in a voice I’d never expect from her. She sounded terrified.
Nate left with his head down. It was silent in the room for a moment until Sophia sighed again.
“I’m sorry,”
I said. “We got carried away.”
“You can’t date a shifter, dear,” she whispered. “He’s a nice boy, but not for you.”
“I love him,” I said.
She chuckled without humor. “Love him? Even better. You are going to get me killed. That’s how I die. Not the war. Not bribing hunters. It’s going to be you.”
“I would never hurt you, Sophia.”
“I know, love. You wouldn’t.” Her phone chirped in her pocket, and she jumped. She looked as spastic as I did at school. “I know,” she said to the caller. “I understand. I’m handling it. Goodbye.” She straightened her dress with her trembling hands. “Come sit, sweetheart.” We sat on the sofa, and she grabbed both of my hands. “Did he see you?” she asked, her voice shaking.
“No. I stayed up here.”
She sighed and closed her eyes. “I’ll handle it. Don’t worry. She won’t turn you in. If Remi is with a hunter who purges now, she won’t be going anywhere near the actual agents. Everything is fine. But … just to be sure, I’m going to take you to your other home in California.”
“Is everyone going?” She shook her head and kissed my hand.
“This is all my fault. I shouldn’t have brought them here. I’m sorry, sweetheart, but they can’t go with you.”
“No! I want them to come. All of them. Especially Nate.”
Her phone went off again. She jumped again, more rattled than before. She listened for a moment, her face twisted in pain. “Vaughn. Her name is Remi Vaughn. Human. She wasn’t before. She is now.” Sophia’s free hand balled into a fist. “I didn’t know until a few minutes ago!” She huffed into the phone. “Christine told me.”
Sophia’s husband or whoever that was must have been very upset. Her eyes watered as she listened. She closed the phone without speaking again. Maybe the caller had hung up on her.
“I have to go, sweetheart. I’ll come back later.” She snapped and grabbed my hands again. “I put a suitcase in your closet, but I’ll pack for you when I come back. We can discuss Nathan then.”
A tear fell from her sparkling eye just before she vanished. At least she saw how horrible this was. I ran down to Nate’s room and walked through the open door. Paul and Emma were watching him pack.
“Paul says we’re headed to Texas. We’re going to stay at Sophia’s house for a while,” Nate said. “She said you were going to California, right?”
“Yeah.” I sat on his bed and folded a pair of jeans for him “Do you … want to go to Texas?” I asked.
“Nope. I want to go with you, but I heard Sophia. I heard her say you can’t date me. She doesn’t think I’m good enough for you.”
Before I could disagree, Paul smacked his lips and Emma sighed loudly.
“She would never think a witch is better than a shifter. I’m sure she doesn’t have anything against you. It’s not in her nature,” Paul said. “I’m not saying this because she’s my grandmother, but she’s an angel. She didn’t come out of hiding when the world embraced magic, so she was one of the few of our kind with a job for like a decade. Our house stayed packed with all sorts of creatures needing her help. Some were shifters just like you.”
“It’s true,” Emma said. “She wouldn’t act that way with you. She only ever wants to help. She even got my parents out of jail. Not a cage, like a real prison. I can’t imagine how much that cost, and she’s never asked for a penny. And she’s spent thousands on me alone, just from this year. She would never be rude to you, Nathan. She’s just weird about Christine. Very protective.”
Nate sat next to me and covered his face. “I know! And she walked in while I was all over her prized possession. I’m lucky she’s even letting me go to Texas.”
“I’m not her prized possession,” I said.
They all grunted. Paul nodded sarcastically. “Sure, you’re not. She only threatens her own flesh and blood for you. Risks getting captured for you. Acts like a completely different person for you. And Nate just told us this is your house! Now, it’s even stranger. Nana’s TVs at home don’t even have color! And since your parents died years ago, I know she had to get all these flat screens for you.”
I hadn’t thought about that. Why would there be flat screens here if my parents died when I was a baby? And they were here before I came. Or at least by the time she gave me the tour. And everything was clean, not much dust other than in Catherine’s studio. And wasn’t there a big storm and flood here a few years ago? This house didn’t look like it had gone through a hurricane and been vacant until now.
“Thanks for letting us stay here,” Emma said. “We really didn’t know until Nate just blurted it out.”
“I can’t believe you didn’t mention it,” Paul said. “If this were my house, you guys would know it every day. Every time you sat on something, I’d say you’re welcome.”
Emma smacked his shoulder. “And I’m sorry about Remi, Chris. I feel responsible. He could have seen you. She told me she had a new boyfriend the other day, a wizard she wanted me to meet. I didn’t think she’d bring him here.”
That was the last thing I heard any of them say. They didn’t know what Remi was. They didn’t know about her friend. They didn’t know just how much danger they’d just been in. And me, too. Liam could be the kind of hunter who would want to breed me. Maybe he even knew Julian.
I shivered.
I assumed Paul and Emma left to pack, I hadn’t heard them say. My boyfriend stuffed the clothes on his bed in a little duffle bag. He walked out of the room and came back with a toothbrush and deodorant.
The selfish part of me wanted to cry about him leaving, Paul and Emma, too. I knew he’d hold me and treat me like the victim I wasn’t.
“We’ll have the phone, babe. Or I’ll catch a bus to California. Or … would you use magic to come see me?”
I couldn’t look at him and lie flat out, so I said, “No.”
“Okay. I understand.” His shoulders fell, and I reached for his face.
“You think you’re not important enough for me to use magic, don’t you?” He nodded.
This would be where I would clam up. I’d be silent and deceitful for his love. His smile. But that could have gotten everyone in the house hurt today. If I hadn’t called Sophia, and finally said something, they could be in cages and I could be wherever breeding happened.
“You are important enough, Nate. You’re the most important person to ever have lived to me. When I say I can’t use magic, I mean that literally.”
“I understand. We’ll work it out,” he said, tempting me to let it go. I reached up to kiss him. His response was immediate. Sweet and soft. Possibly the last.
“I love you,” I said. “And that’s really amazing because I didn’t even think that would be possible for me. In a really short time, you’ve changed my life. Made me smile and laugh. But—”
He groaned and touched a tear I hadn’t felt. “Let me guess. I’m a nice boy, but just not for you.”
“No, listen.”
“I know Sophia is great. They didn’t have to praise her. She saved my life already. And yours, too. So I understand if you want to listen to her.”
“No, Nate. I’m not breaking up with you, but once I tell you something, you may want to break up with me.” I stared at his flawless face, my heart pounding, tears streaming. “I’ve been trying to tell you something. Not very hard, but I’ve wanted to say something important. I’ve been really dishonest about who I am. I’ve been selfish because I didn’t want to lose you. I didn’t want to go back to not having anyone. And today, I could’ve gotten you hurt. All of us.”
“I don’t understand, babe. What’s wrong?”
I looked away, trembling. “I can’t use magic to come see you … because I don’t have it. I thought I was a witch, but a few days ago, right before you walked in and saw me bleeding, I found out I’m not. I’m … human. More than that, I’m one of the things you think are disgusting. Psychic. Like my mother was.”
We
sat there, tensed, for a lifetime.
“Are you joking?” he whispered.
“I wish.” Another agonizing pause. “I’m not like the copies you talked about. My parents loved each other. And I do get very angry, but I am always trying not to be. Always, Nate. I swear. And my mother didn’t pass me her powers in the way you’d think. I read it in her diary. I could go get it. You could read it with me.” He still didn’t say anything. “Breeding is different than you think. The whole copy thing, it’s so different, Nate. And I understand if you’re upset. I should have told you the minute I found out. I’m sorry. I love you.”
I desperately needed to hear him say it back. I needed him to be my glue, to fix everything like he’d done every day since we played fetch.
“No, you don’t,” Nate whispered. He stood from the bed and moved painfully slow and painfully far away. “You can’t. Copies don’t love. They don’t feel anything but hate.” He leaned against the wall with his head hanging low. “The first time I saw you, I thought it was eerie how perfect you were. Like someone took exactly what I’d find attractive and delivered her to me, or me to her. Then made her smell like perfection. Act like it, too.” He chuckled and looked up at me. “There is no God controlling this. It’s you. And I think you’re perfect because you are. The wolf told me they drown copies if they don’t come out right. They have to be absolutely perfect, or their masters hold them under water until they die.”
I ran to him when I saw the tears.
“It’s not like that. I don’t have a master. My parents made me,” I said, quoting Sophia.
“I just should’ve known something like this wouldn’t happen to me. Of course I don’t have a girlfriend. Why would I? Did you make me think I was in love with you? Is that why we were moving so fast? A mind trick?”
“No!” I cried. At least I didn’t think it was.
“Jesus, what is your master planning for us? Is Sophia helping you? Or are you going to hurt her, too?”
“It’s not like that. I just found out.” I wrapped my arms around him, clutching his t-shirt. “You have to believe me. I’m the same person I was a minute ago.”
“Stop touching me,” he said, pushing me away. “You have us in your home, pretending like we’re guests. Letting me sleep in your bed. That’s really gross. Really twisted!” He gasped and rubbed his neck. “My head! I’m getting my head cut off, aren’t I?” I couldn’t move. This was way worse than I imagined it would be. His beautiful green eyes were burning with more than disgust. With hate and hurt and fear.
“Nate, no. Please listen to me. I love you, and I would never hurt you.”
“You can stop with the act now, Christine or Leah or whoever you are.” Leah? I was her again? I was nothing again?
He snatched his bag and ran out of the room. “Get out of here!” he yelled. “She’s a copy. Go!”
I ran into the hall, toward the commotion he’d caused by yelling. He blew past me and ran out of the front door. I ran down the stairs, no hope of catching him, but still running, because I needed him, because I couldn’t let us end like this. He’d left the door open, and I raced to it. At the threshold, a frozen arm hooked around my stomach. I almost screamed at Catherine, but this chill was different. This ghost was different.
I fell to my knees in the doorway, acting like my mother way too late. The door closed in front of me slowly, nudged by my father. It felt like it meant, don’t be silly and run after him, you still can’t leave the house.
I had to stay hidden and alone. Like I was meant to be.
Emma and Paul never came out. The eerie quiet of the house told me they were gone, too.
Being tortured by high school girls was not death. This was. Having everything snatched away in a moment. Having Nathan look at me like he hated me. Being told not to touch him.
I stretched out on the floor, crumbling. It felt like Raymond stretched out, too.
“Go back to your wife,” I whispered. “The lady who killed herself because of you. I’m fine here alone. And I’ll be this way for the rest of my life.”
But he didn’t leave. He stayed down there with me, just far enough away that my teeth didn’t chatter.
Nate thought I wanted to hurt him, that all of this was my trap. I’d immediately turned evil in his mind. I’d never be held again. Kissed either. I wished it had never happened. Then I wouldn’t know what I was missing out on.
I ran out of tears after a while. I was just coughing and calling for my ex-boyfriend who couldn’t hear me.
“Emma called,” Sophia whispered. Raymond left at the sound of her voice. I didn’t have enough energy to stand or move at all. “She’s worried about you. Are you okay, love?” I didn’t answer. Wasn’t that obvious? “How long have you known that you’re human?”
“A few days.” She kneeled next to me and brushed my hair out of my face. “You?”
“Your whole life. It’s a long story. I’ll tell you when you wake up.” I wasn’t tired until she’d said that. She kissed my forehead, and my eyes closed. “That’s it. Don’t fight it, love. Just sleep.”