I ground my teeth and ignored it, flashing another binding ward on the nearest demon. The huli jing weren’t large, about the size of a large squirrel, but their bites hurt. “Dammit! Ow! Jim—thank you.”
Use me to end this.
“Over my dead body,” I swore under my breath.
Your death would serve no purpose. You must use your full powers, Aisling Grey. Show the world what you are capable of. Use me now.
Jim snarled and lunged as three huli jing went for my throat.
Inside me, the dark voice was teasing a response from me, an almost overwhelming need to use it. I knew how powerful it could be—just channeling it made me feel invincible, righteous, an instrument of justice.
You can do anything with me, Aisling Grey. You could rule Abaddon, rule the Otherworld. Your heart’s desire is within your grasp—all you need do is reach out and take it.
I grunted as a small herd of huli jing slammed into me, my hands flashing as I drew wards to protect myself. They glowed golden in the air for a moment before dissolving to nothing.
You could destroy them all with just a wave of your hand. Use me.
“Fire, Aisling, use the dragon fire,” Nora ordered, releasing another fireball as another wave of huli jing descended upon us.
“No!” I screamed, trying to shut the voice out of my mind, but it was useless. A person I could keep from my awareness, but not the dark voice, not while I was proscribed.
Nora shot me a quick, startled look before lifting both hands in the air, bringing them down with a thunderclap that sent Jim and me flying backwards into the wall, the deafening noise making my ears ring.
“What…good god, what did you do?” I asked a few seconds later, as soon as my wits returned. I used Jim to haul myself to my feet, looking around with astonishment to note that all the fox creatures had disappeared.
“I banished them. Are you bleeding?” She spoke the last word as if it was inconceivable.
I touched the spot on my head that had collided with the edge of the large square garbage bin, not surprised to see that my fingers came away red. “Yeah, but it’s OK, I’m not hurt badly. Just a little cut.”
A group of people charged around the corner to the alley, a couple of strangers and my family all asking questions about the loud noise.
“It’s nothing. Just…er…I accidentally slammed a brick into the garbage bin,” I yelled down to them, pointing at the large square object. “Sorry to startle everyone.”
Rene stepped forward, his eyes moving from the cut on my face, to my dress, to Nora. He nodded and said something to my stepparents before herding them back toward the street. Uncle Damian was thankfully nowhere to be seen.
“You shouldn’t be hurt at all, not from a banishing,” Nora said with a frown. “Aisling, I know we are no longer mentor and pupil, and thus you do not owe me any explanations, but why did you refuse to use fire to destroy the demons when I asked? Destroying them that way would have caused much less notice than using a group banishment.”
My lovely lace dress was filthy with blood and muck from the alley, torn in several places where the huli jing had attacked, and pretty much destroyed as a wearable garment. I sighed and yanked off one chunk of it that had been torn, using it to mop up the blood that was streaming down my face from the cut on my head. “I didn’t refuse. I can’t use Drake’s fire anymore. Not since that night.”
Her eyes went to mine, her lips thinning. “The proscription?”
“No. Fiat and his damned meddling. I can’t use Drake’s fire anymore because I’m no longer his mate,” I answered, limping over to pick up my sandal. The heel on it was broken. I put it on regardless. “I’m afraid the only power I have is my own.”
Not true. You have me. I will make you strong again.
I gritted my teeth.
“Big bad talking to you again?” Jim asked.
“Yes.”
“Big bad?” Nora asked, looking slightly startled.
“The dark power talks to Ash. She gets testy when it does.”
Her eyes widened behind the lenses of her glasses. “It…it talks to you?”
“Um…maybe. Sometimes. Not all the time, just now and again.”
She backed up a couple of steps, a look of horror on her face. “Aisling—that is not normal. The dark power is not a living being. It cannot speak.”
She does not know anything about me. She has no idea of what abilities you have with me, of what future you could write, the voice said. I closed my eyes for a moment, suddenly exhausted, overwhelmed with the events of the day and the constant battle I fought to keep from using the dark power. I swayed slightly as part of my mind urged me to give in to the hypnotic lure the voice held out in front of me. I wasn’t a bad person; I wasn’t evil. Couldn’t I change the power from bad to good?
You can do anything you want.
Jim touched its cold, wet nose on the back of my hand, bringing me back to reality. “Aisling?”
I opened my eyes and straightened up, squaring my shoulders. “I’m OK. Get my purse, will you?” I limped over to Nora and bit my lip. I wanted to hug her, to thank her for saving me. “Nora, I don’t know what to say. Thank you for everything.”
You can save yourself, you know. You’ve done so in the past. You are not weak.
“And thank you for coming to the wedding. I just wish there had actually been a wedding for you to see.”
You do not have to subordinate yourself to her. She has little compared to you.
“Lastly, thank you for being my friend, even though I know things are difficult right now.”
It doesn’t have to be that way. You can change your life to whatever you want. Right the wrongs, Aisling Grey. Be what you were meant to be.
“Aisling…” Nora took a step forward, one hand extended as if she was going to take mine, but she stopped, her eyes filled with pity. “I’m so sorry. I blame myself for this. If I’d had the time to warn you…but hindsight will do no good now. I must be off. The Guild will not be happy to know I was here in the first place, and I mustn’t linger. My best wishes to you and Drake.”
Hot, painful tears started up again behind my eyes as a wave of self-pity washed over me. Dammit, it wasn’t fair!
Make it right. Fix it.
“I won’t give in to you,” I said softly, dragging my mind from the knowledge that the voice was right—using it, I could do anything. “I am a Guardian. I protect people. I am not an instrument of vengeance. I’m good, dammit!”
“Yes, you are,” Nora said softly, reaching for me again, her hand stopping a hairsbreadth from mine. “And that is why you are able to withstand the dark power. Keep fighting, Aisling. Don’t let it win. Don’t take the easy road. Be what you were meant to be.”
That’s all I ask, the voice cooed. Be what you were meant to be.
3
“Well, lookie what the cat dragged in,” Jim quipped as the door to Drake’s study was thrown open with enough force to make the pictures rattle on the wall. “Hmm. No blood, no signs of a fight…not good, man, not good at all. You should at least have made it look like you guys had been roughed up. You might have scored some sympathy points that way, but looking like you stepped off the cover of GQ isn’t going to win you any friends.”
“Be quiet, annoying one,” I said, my heart doing its usual somersault at the sight of the dragon of my dreams.
Drake stormed into the room, his jaw tight, his eyes blazing. The pupils were narrow elongated vertical slits set in emerald that glittered a warning to all that the man behind the eyes was more than he seemed.
“Your eyes are all dragony. I take it—Oh, hello. I’m sorry, it was a false alarm. He just came home. Thank you for checking the emergency ward.” I clicked off the phone, sliding off the top of the desk to face the furious man in front of me. “I take it that there was a problem?”
Drake’s eyes narrowed as he eyed the bandage on my forehead. “You look like hell.”
“Oh, man
. This is so not going to end well,” Jim said, putting a paw over its eyes.
“Out!” I ordered, pointing to the door. In the hallway beyond, Pál and István, Drake’s two red-headed bodyguards, were visible talking to Uncle Damian. “Yes, that’s an order. Go afflict yourself on someone else.”
“What happened?” Drake asked, touching the bandage.
I leaned into him, wrapping my arms around his waist, breathing deeply to absorb that wonderful spicy Drake scent that simultaneously made me feel safe, and want to rip off all his clothing and have my way with him. “Oddly enough, I was about to ask you the same thing.”
“You answer first. I have not been injured. What happened to you?”
“Demon attack. Nora was there and banished them. I hit my head on a garbage can, that’s all. Oh, the wedding is rescheduled for tomorrow at three. Your turn—where were you?”
Drake pushed me back off him, his hands quickly running over my body, obviously in an attempt to check for in juries.
“That would be a whole lot more fun if we were both naked, but since we aren’t, and since you haven’t answered my question, you can stop now,” I told him, slapping at his hands as he felt my rib cage.
His frown was a thing of beauty to behold—beautiful in its fierceness, that is. No one could frown quite like Drake. I think it was a combination of that square jaw, the long, thin nose, the black hair sweeping back…or maybe it was his eyes, those fascinating green eyes that were never quite human, the slightly elongated pupils giving his eyes an exotic, foreign appearance that always fascinated me.
“Have you seen a doctor?” he asked, his hands ignoring mine to settle on my belly.
“No, there was no need to. It’s just a small cut on my head.”
“The baby could be hurt. I will call a doctor.” He leaned over to grab the phone.
I snatched it up before he could get it. “The baby is not hurt. If there is a baby, and we’re not sure there is, so please stop with the overprotective stuff.”
“The pregnancy tests came back positive,” he answered, trying to pry my fingers off the phone.
“Two did. The other two said I wasn’t pregnant.” I curled my fingers tighter around the phone. Drake had always been a protective sort of guy, but he’d gone into overdrive with the possibility of a baby.
“It’s been three months. We know. You’re pregnant,” he answered, his frown growing darker as he realized he couldn’t get the phone from me without hurting my hand.
“It’s been two and a half months, and the doctor said the demon lord stuff was messing up the test results. We’re just going to have to wait and see what the ultrasound shows.”
“You will have that now rather than wait until your appointment next week,” Drake ordered in his bossy voice.
I smiled. Dear god, how I loved him, annoying ways and all. “All right.”
“I know you had the appointment arranged for after our trip to Paris…all right?” His brow cleared. I giggled at his look of surprise.
“Yeah, I was a bit stressed when I made that appointment. I think it’s going to be better for us both if we know for certain sooner rather than later. I’ll try to get them to move it up to this week, OK?”
“Now,” he said, trying to tug the phone from my hand.
“After the wedding,” I answered, my grip and intentions resolute.
He pursed his lips. I licked them.
“Immediately afterwards.”
I thought for a few seconds. The reception was scheduled to follow the wedding, but since the hotel ballroom was booked for earlier today and not tomorrow, our chances of having that were nil. I sighed. “It’s not a horribly romantic way to end a wedding, but I’ll try to get the appointment for tomorrow afternoon.”
“I think it’s romantic,” Drake answered, desire making his eyes go molten as he pulled me up against his body. “We have made a child together. I greatly enjoyed the creative process.”
“Well, put that way, I suppose it is…go on, say it. You haven’t yet today, and you know the rule—I have to hear it once a day until you can say it without making a big drama over it.”
Drake sighed an exaggerated, much-put-upon sigh, although I noticed his hands were busy groping my butt. He growled low in his throat, a sound that never failed to make my toes curl with delight. “What if I were to breathe fire on you instead, kincsem?”
“How about you do both?”
His lips touched mine, teasing, tasting, sending me into a near frenzy of desire as I opened myself up to his dragon fire. His kiss was as fiery hot as the dragon fire that surrounded us, burning around our bodies in a spiral of flame that would have set off the smoke detectors if Drake hadn’t had this room specially fireproofed.
Drake’s tongue got all bossy with mine, as it was wont to do, something I tolerated with extreme pleasure. As kisses went, it was at the top of the scale, his body moving seductively against mine to the point where I was considering how long it would take to engage in wild, sweaty bunny sex on the floor of the study. But there was something missing from the kiss, something that I’d taken for granted until it was gone, something that I hadn’t realized I would miss so much when it was denied to me.
I couldn’t share his dragon fire. He could heat me up from the outside with it, as he was now, but it was the sharing of his fire that had bound us so intimately, the fire doing more than just giving me energy—it had woven itself into my being, an element that was part Drake, part me, one that was unique to us. Without it, I felt…unfinished.
I kissed him with all the passion I had. He tasted as he always did—hot and spicy, like he’d been drinking dragon’s blood, a potent spiced wine that was favored by the dragons, and which could be fatal to mortals. Reluctantly, I pulled away from him, my heart aching for all that we’d lost. “Why did you have enough time to have a drink, but not to marry me?”
“István had a flask with him,” Drake murmured against my neck, his lips branding a hot trail of fire over to the spot behind my ear that made my legs go weak. “The police gave it back to him when they released us, and we had a pull on it in the car on the way home.”
I pulled back so I could look at him. “Police? You were arrested? Why?”
The passion in his beautiful eyes faded to a hard glint that made me shiver…and not with excitement. “Chuan Ren.”
“Goddamn it! She had you arrested?” I grabbed the lapels on Drake’s tuxedo, realized what I was doing, and smoothed out the wrinkles. “Why is she still doing this? I thought you took care of her silly legal wranglings when you went to Budapest last week.”
“I stopped her attacks on the holdings of the sept members in Europe, yes. But somehow, she managed to manipulate a judge here and had warrants issued for the arrest of Pál, István, and myself on trumped-up charges of terrorism.”
“Terrorism? You? That bitch!” I stormed around the room, so frustrated I wanted to scream.
Why be frustrated? If you use me, you can—
“Shut up!” I bellowed as I stomped past the desk.
Drake cocked an eyebrow but knew I wasn’t addressing him.
“Sweetie, I know you’re doing everything you can, but you have to stop this war with the red dragons. If Chuan Ren has the sort of power to get you arrested on your wedding day, then who knows what else she can do! I’m sure those huli jing were sent by her today—they’re Chinese fox spirits, and I can’t think of anyone else I’ve pissed off enough lately to set demonic beings after me.”
“You were on the street?” Drake asked, frowning.
“Not for long. Nora was at the wedding—what was supposed to be the wedding—and I couldn’t let the opportunity to talk with her slip away, so I dragged her around to the back of the church, out of sight of the street. I don’t know how the huli jing found us, but that is really a moot point. We can’t continue to live our lives in perpetual fear that the red dragons are going to attack us at any moment! We’ve got to stop the war once and for all
! We can’t let it go on as long as the last war you had with them—that was, what, thirty years or something?”
“Forty-three.”
I put my hands on my hips. “This last month has been hell, what with the assassination attempts, you having to fly out to Budapest every couple of days, and all the other crap Chuan Ren is throwing at us. It has to stop, Drake.”
Drake sat on the edge of his desk, his eyes distraught. Immediately, I was filled with remorse for railing at him when he was doing his best to end the war between the septs.
“Oh, sweetie, I’m sorry,” I said, rushing over to stand between his legs, wrapping my arms around him. “I know you’re doing everything you can, and I’m not blaming you one little bit. You’ve worked miracles these last couple of weeks, keeping Chuan Ren from destroying the sept businesses and homes and such. And everyone is grateful for the guards you’ve sent—Tamas from Germany said earlier today that they’d caught two red dragons trying to set fire to their house, and they would have been goners if the guards weren’t there. So I’m not holding you responsible at all for the fact that Chuan Ren is a lunatic who will do anything to destroy us—it’s just…if I am pregnant…I just don’t want…”
“I know, kincsem. I do not want a child growing up in the middle of a war, either,” he said, holding me tight as I gave in to the emotions of the day and had a little cry on his shoulder. “If it is within my power to stop the war, I will do so.”
“Our power,” I said, my voice muffled against the cloth of his tux as I hiccuped the end of my tears. “We will stop it. We work together now, remember?”
He kissed the top of my head and said nothing. I smiled into his shoulder, relishing both the feeling of protection he offered and the maddening frustration that was inevitable whenever he tried to keep me from becoming involved in something dangerous.
“Oh, crap,” I said, pulling away from him. “Your suit—I just ruined it.”
Drake looked at the sodden, bloody shoulder of his tuxedo. “It does not matter. I have others.”
“I hope so. Did I tell you the wedding was rescheduled for tomorrow?”