She suddenly felt uncomfortable, not to mention confused. What on earth had gotten into Caroline? For two years her sister hadn’t seemed to have any qualms about asking Holly for every favor imaginable—what the hell had changed?
“That’s right,” Caroline said, shaking her head. “She’s got a boyfriend, and none of us even knew about him.”
“Caroline,” Holly began, wanting to say that Carson wasn’t exactly her boyfriend.
Her sister silenced her with a sharp look. “No, don’t explain. You have a boyfriend, and you didn’t tell us, but that’s not the issue. The issue is that none of us even cared to ask if you were seeing anyone new. We’re jerks, Hol. We expect you to fix everything in our lives and don’t bother being interested in yours. All we do is make demands. It’s no wonder you got your boyfriend to hang up on me. I deserved it.”
A short silence fell over the table.
Holly’s father finally cleared his throat and shot her a gentle look. “Honey…is it true? Do you think we make too many demands of you?”
Holly swallowed. “Sometimes.”
Her dad looked away, but not before she saw a flash of guilt in his eyes. “I’m sorry,” he said. “You always seemed so eager to help out, doing all the stuff around the house that your mom used to do…” Sorrow creased his features. “And I was too busy missing your mother to notice how unfair I was being to you.”
“It’s okay, Daddy,” she said, her voice coming out shaky.
“No, it’s not. Caroline’s right. Your mother’s gone, and it’s time we figured out how to take care of ourselves.” He suddenly straightened his shoulders, his stern expression reminding her of the way he’d been before her mom had died. Strong, commanding. “First things first, I want you go home.”
She faltered. “What?”
“You said you have an exam to prepare for. Go home and focus on that, honey. And while you’re taking care of yourself, the rest of us are going to clean up and do the dishes and figure out exactly how we’re going to make it up to you. Got it?”
She couldn’t help but smile. “Got it.”
She was still smiling as she left her father’s house and headed for her car. Although she was a bit stunned over what just happened, she wasn’t about to complain. For some reason, her family had come to their senses tonight.
No, not for some reason.
Because of Carson.
Carson had gotten through to Caroline last night. Instead of letting Holly go clean up another one of her sister’s messes, he’d forced Caroline to deal with it herself. And the tough-love approach had worked. Holly had been babying them all for so long, and thanks to Carson, she wouldn’t be doing that any longer. How could she have ever thought he was selfish?
I know you want to be with me…we’d both be a lot better off if you’d just admit it.
The memory of his parting words made her heart squeeze, reminding her again of just how much of a moron she was. He was right. She did want to be with him. She’d walked away from him that first night at the club because she’d been scared of the intense desire he’d evoked inside her. And she’d walked away from him yesterday because that intense desire had transformed into something a little too close to love, and that had scared her more.
But she wasn’t scared anymore. Steve might have broken her heart, but Carson had put the pieces back together.
So maybe it was time to stop acting like an idiot and give him what he wanted. What she wanted.
Starting the car, Holly reversed out of the driveway, knowing exactly what she needed to do.
CARSON WASN’T PICKING up his phone. Holly left him three voice mails, but by the next day, he still hadn’t called back. She would have driven over to his apartment, but she was ashamed that she didn’t even know where he lived. She’d tried so hard to keep him at a distance, to keep things on her own turf, that she hadn’t bothered to find out his address.
By the time early evening rolled around, she was getting frustrated. She needed to see him, damn it. Apologize for calling him selfish and asking him to leave, when all he’d tried to do was show her that it was time to stop letting her family take advantage of her.
There was only one other way she could think to find him, so just after six, she got into her car and drove across the bridge to Coronado. At John and Shelby Garrett’s wedding, she’d overheard that the bride ran a bakery and coffee shop near the Navy base, so Holly headed in that direction. She found the place quickly—the name, Shelby’s Bakery Café, helped narrow it down—and parked at the curb out front.
The bell over the door chimed as she stepped inside. A few elderly women sat at a small table by the window, sipping coffee, but the gorgeous blonde from the wedding was nowhere in sight. Holly drifted through the doorway that separated the café from the bakery, and found Shelby Garrett standing behind the counter, blowing her nose with a crumpled tissue.
It was obvious the other woman was upset, and Holly was about to back away when Shelby caught sight of her.
With a strained smile, Shelby said, “Can I help you?”
“You’re Shelby, right?”
The blonde nodded.
Holly offered a smile of her own. “I’m Holly Lawson. I work for the company that catered your wedding.”
A spark of recognition filled Shelby’s blue eyes. Holly couldn’t help but notice how pretty the woman was. Shelby looked like she belonged in an advertisement for surfing gear or something, all California girl good looks.
“Is this about the check we wrote?” Shelby asked with a sigh. “Johnny swore he put the right date on it, but he accidentally postdate his checks all the time.”
“No, as far as I know, everything is fine.” Holly moved closer to the counter, pretending not to notice the other woman’s red-rimmed eyes and blotchy cheeks. She hoped there wasn’t trouble in paradise already. The couple she’d seen at the wedding had looked so disgustingly in love, it would be a shame if they’d somehow lost that lovin’ feeling.
“I’m actually here about something else. Well, someone.” She swallowed, absently glancing at the cakes in the refrigerated glass cases next to the counter. “Carson Scott. He’s your husband’s friend, right?”
A rosy blush swept over Shelby’s cheeks. “A friend of both of ours, actually.”
Holly could sense there was a whole story behind that one sentence, but this probably wasn’t the best time to pry. Instead, she moistened her lips and said, “I’m trying to get in touch with him but he’s not answering his phone. I was hoping maybe you could give me his address.” She quickly pressed on. “I swear, I’m not a crazy stalker or anything. Carson and I…have been seeing each other, I guess. I just needed to talk to him.”
“I’m afraid his address isn’t going to help you right now. The team left for an assignment last night. I have no idea where they are, or when they’ll be back.” Shelby had barely finished her last sentence when a few tears slid down her cheeks again. Looking embarrassed, she swiped at them with the sleeve of her green V-neck shirt. “I’m sorry. I know, it’s pathetic, huh? I shouldn’t get this hysterical over John being away. It’s what he does. I knew that when I married him.” She blinked a few times, her lashes spiky with wetness. “But it still sucks, you know? Never knowing if he’s okay. Making coffee and baking cakes while he’s God-knows-where, possibly getting shot at.”
With a shaky breath, Shelby raised her tissue and blew her nose again.
Her words brought a spark of alarm to Holly’s gut. Getting shot at? She’d been so focused on herself ever since she’d met Carson that she hadn’t given much thought to what the life of a SEAL was like. God, was he in danger right now? The idea sent her pulse racing.
“Shit, I scared you, didn’t I?” Shelby blurted out. She tossed her tissue in the wastebasket behind her and quickly rounded the counter. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to freak you out.”
Holly gulped. “I’m not freaked out. Though I am kinda worried now.”
Shelby offered a mil
d smile. “Goes with the territory. Do you want a cup of coffee?”
What she wanted was to hear Carson’s voice and make sure he wasn’t dead, but she found herself nodding. “Sure.”
The blonde poured two cups, then led Holly into the café, where they sat down. “So how long have you been seeing Carson?” Shelby asked curiously.
“A week and a half, but we met about a month ago. At your bachelorette party, actually.”
Shelby’s delicate brows soared. “Seriously?”
“You look surprised.”
“Well, I am. Carson doesn’t usually stay with one girl for long.” Shelby shot her an apologetic look. “No offense to you or anything.”
“None taken.” Holly sipped her coffee. “He told me all about it.”
Again Shelby’s cheeks flushed. “He did? Damn, that’s awkward, then.”
Holly blinked. “It is?”
“Well, most women wouldn’t enjoy having coffee with someone their boyfriend has slept with.”
Holly choked mid-sip. “You slept with Carson? Does your husband know?”
The other woman laughed. “Uh, yeah, he knows. He was there.”
After a beat, Holly burst out laughing, too. Figured. Carson had told her he’d led a pretty racy life, so she really wasn’t surprised to find out he’d had a threesome with his best friend and best friend’s now-wife. Oddly enough, she wasn’t angry, or even jealous. Besides, the fact that Carson had chosen to leave his casual lifestyle for her was kind of flattering.
“God, I’m an idiot,” Holly burst out.
Shelby laughed again. “Um, okay. Care to elaborate?”
Although she didn’t know Shelby at all, Holly couldn’t help but spill everything, from her first encounter with Carson to the fight they’d had two nights ago. “He was just trying to help,” she finished, “and I called him selfish and kicked him out.”
“Don’t worry, he’ll come back,” Shelby assured her. “Trust me, if Carson wants a relationship with you, he’ll fight for it. He never gives up. It’s actually very annoying.”
Holly gave a brief smile. “Let’s hope he still wants a relationship when he gets back.” Her smile faded, and a quivery breath left her throat. “Because if he doesn’t, I’ll kick myself for the rest of my life for letting him get away.”
CHAPTER SIX
Two weeks. He’d been gone for two weeks. And Holly was beginning to grow more than a little worried. She’d called Shelby every day since her visit to the café, and the other woman hadn’t been able to provide her with any details. Apparently someone from the base had called Shelby to tell her John had been in radio contact and should be heading home soon, but other than that, Holly had no clue if Carson was okay. She hoped he was, because if he didn’t come home in one piece, she was going to have a nervous breakdown.
At least one good thing had come from all the worrying. She’d tried so hard to distract herself that she’d ended up cooking up a storm, and she’d impressed the hell out of her teacher with her dishes. He told her he would give her a glowing recommendation letter to any restaurant she applied at, but at this point, Holly wasn’t sure what she wanted to do. Shelby had told her a restaurant a block from the café was up for sale, and Holly was seriously considering getting a bank loan and taking the place over herself after she finished school.
But before she made any decisions about her future, she needed Carson to come home already. She missed him. Cooking dinner for him, watching those awful action movies, having mind-blowing sex. If he didn’t come back soon, she didn’t know what she’d do.
“Holly, are you listening to me?” her sister snapped, jerking her out of her thoughts.
She absently walked around her kitchen, holding the phone to her ear as she opened a few cabinets and tried to decide what she would make to eat. “Sorry, what were you saying?”
“The computer course Dad is taking,” Caroline said impatiently. “He wants us to go over there this weekend so he can show us all the stuff he’s learned. I know it’ll be boring, but he’s really excited about it.”
Holly tried not to laugh. Ever since their dinner two weeks ago, her family had truly been making an effort to give her space. Todd had hired himself a tutor, Kyle hadn’t locked his keys in his car once, Caroline had stopped dyeing her hair, and their father was learning how to use the computer to pay his bills online. So far, none of them had called her with any emergencies, which was a huge relief, since the only thing she was capable of concentrating on right now was Carson and when the hell he would come back to the States.
“Don’t worry, I’ll be there,” she assured her sister.
“Good. I’ll see you Saturday, then. Oh, and let me tell you about this guy I met at the Hot Zone last night. Hol, he was soooo cute! He—”
The phone beeped in her ear, cutting off Caroline’s sentence.
Holly’s heart skipped a beat. “Care, I’ve got to go. Someone’s trying to be buzzed up.”
She hung up before her sister could object and pressed the code that would open the lobby door. Then, with an excited yelp, she tossed the phone on the counter and dashed toward the front door. Carson! It had to be him.
Flinging open the door, she stepped into the hallway and glued her gaze to the elevator at the end of the hall. One second…two…three… The elevator doors swung open, and a wave of joy slammed into her. There he was, wearing khakis and a green T-shirt, his jaw covered in thick blond stubble. His blue eyes narrowed with wariness when he saw her lurking in the corridor.
He took a step forward, then stopped. “You’re not gonna ask me to leave again, are you?” he called out.
“Not on your life,” she called back.
A smile broke across his handsome face. “Thank fuck. Because I missed you like crazy.”
With urgent strides, he crossed the hall and made his way toward her. He’d barely reached the door when she launched herself into his arms and wrapped her arms tightly around him. “I’m so glad you’re okay,” she murmured into the crook of his neck. “You were gone so long. I was worried.”
He stroked her back with his big, warm hands and pressed a kiss to her temple. “Don’t worry. We just extracted a CEO and led him through the jungle for ten days. Piece of cake.”
Holly laughed, then pulled him into the apartment and closed the door behind them. “Please tell me nobody shot at you.”
Carson shrugged. “There might’ve been a bullet or two aimed in our direction,” he said vaguely.
Alarm coursed through her. “Were you hit? Are you hurt?” She immediately began running her fingers over his body in search of a hidden bandage.
Chuckling, he trapped her hands between his. “Quit doing that.”
“Why?” She stared accusingly at him. “You were hurt!”
“No, I wasn’t hurt,” he replied, rolling his eyes. “But if you keep touching me I’m going to come in my pants. I’ve been thinking about nothing but fucking you for two weeks now, so I’m a little on edge.”
A smile stretched across her mouth. “You’re not allowed to come in your pants. I’m pretty sex-starved too, so don’t you dare deprive me.”
He smiled back, but then his expression darkened. “I didn’t come here to continue the fling, sweetheart.”
“Good, because I don’t want to.”
He faltered. “You don’t?”
She reached up and pressed her palm to his chest, enjoying the sleek muscles under her fingertips. “I want more this time,” she admitted, looking up to meet his eyes. “I acted like an idiot, Carson. I was scared.”
“Scared,” he echoed uncertainly.
“I was starting to feel something for you, and I…I guess I didn’t want to deal with it. My ex dumped me because I wouldn’t make him my world, and then you wanted me to tell my family to screw off, and it was too much like what Steve wanted, and…” She took a breath. “I overreacted, and I accused you of being selfish when you aren’t, and I…I messed up. I’m sorry. I want nothin
g more than to be in a relationship with you.”
Carson tilted his head, still looking unsure. “What happened to having too many responsibilities for a relationship?”
“My stress levels have lowered considerably.” She quickly told him about everything that had happened with her family, and the changes in her life. “So far, they’re managing just fine on their own. You were right—they needed to stand on their own two feet instead of relying on me.”
“What about school?” he asked.
“I still have six months left.” She shot him a grin. “But I think I’ll be able to squeeze you in between classes. Don’t worry, I’ll make lots of time for my sexy sailor boyfriend…”
“Lots of time, huh?” His voice grew husky, while a playful glint lit his eyes. “How on earth are we going to pass the time?”
She brushed her fingers over his pecs, feeling his flat nipples harden beneath her touch. Still smiling, she moved one hand down his magnificent chest and rested it on the growing bulge at his crotch. “I’m sure we can think of something.”
He groaned as she rubbed his erection, but intercepted her hand before she could reach for his zipper. “One more thing,” he said gruffly. “And don’t you dare try to distract me with a blowjob, because I have to say this.”
She feigned annoyance. “Fine. What is it?”
“I’ve fallen in love with you.”
The vulnerability she saw in his eyes stole the breath from her lungs. As her heart did a little somersault, she swallowed hard and said, “I’m in love with you, too.”
Carson bent down and brushed his lips over hers, the gentle kiss causing her toes to curl. Then he pulled back and offered a devastating grin. “So…now that we’ve settled that, how about that blowjob…Jessica?”
She laughed, even while she undid his zipper. “I’m sorry to inform you that Jessica is gone. You’ve got Holly Lawson now, and she’s not going anywhere.”
“I have no complaints with that.” He moaned as she slid her hand underneath the waistband of his boxers. “No complaints at all, sweetheart.”