Until Grace, when his heart was just as bound to her as his body.
Certain that he'd finally wrung out every ounce of her pleasure, he reluctantly moved his hands from her damp skin so that he could kick off his trousers and boxers and pull a condom from the back pocket before throwing his clothes across the room. Seconds later he had the condom on and her waist between his hands as he lifted her up and over him.
But instead of driving into her the way he wanted to, he held her there, poised directly over him. He'd never wanted anyone, or anything, this badly, but he would never forgive himself for letting desire override any lingering fears she might still have.
"Grace?"
"We're protected?"
He nodded, knowing how important this would be to her, that no matter how much she loved her son, she would instinctively be worried about lightning striking twice and ending up pregnant again by accident. "Yes. I'll always take care of you, Grace."
She put her hands on his face and kissed him, so softly that she took him by surprise when she began to lower herself onto him. There were no words to describe how good it felt as she slowly enveloped him, nothing he could do anymore but tangle his hands in her hair as he took their kiss deeper.
Finally, they were pelvis to pelvis, chest to chest, mouth to mouth. Together, they rocked with each other, hard heat and soft flesh coming together in a perfect dance of pleasure. From moment to moment they took each other higher and higher until he was swallowing her gasps as the tight clasp of her inner muscles climaxing drove him all the way into his own release. One that crashed through him with the strength of a tsunami.
Again and again he thrust up into her, and again and again she came down over him, moving with such obvious joy that the waves took him completely under. Deeper beneath the surface than he had ever gone before. Deeper than he'd even known he could go.
Dylan could feel Grace's heart beating hard and fast against his as they held each other so tightly that there were no spaces left between them. Right here, with her, was where he always wanted to be.
Forever.
CHAPTER TWENTY
Grace had never known that she could completely lose herself in another person and just want to stay lost forever and ever. Was it because Dylan loved her? And, despite all the ways she'd tried to protect her heart, had she fallen in love with him right back?
"I want to stay with you tonight," Dylan said. "I want to hold you all night long."
Her ex had never stayed. He'd always said he needed to get back to the city to prepare for an early morning at the office, and she hadn't pushed, hadn't made him tell her the real reason he was leaving. She hadn't wanted to hear the truth that he had someone else or that she didn't really matter to him.
"I want you to stay, too." But that wasn't the full truth, and after what they'd shared tonight, she couldn't live with anything else. Not when even the smallest lie felt as though it would strip away the beauty of what they'd just done together. "But it scares me how fast we're taking slow. After tonight, it feels more like warp speed." Even that wasn't everything, though. "And I don't want to fix myself, fix what happened, with sex. Because what if that's what I'm doing?"
"If sex helps," Dylan said, "if making love with me makes things better for you, then I can't see why there's one damn thing wrong with it. There's nothing wrong with talking through pain, so why would it be wrong to kiss through it? To let pleasure strip away everything that should never have been there in the first place?"
"I never thought of it like that before."
"I haven't ever really had to fight demons of my own, Grace. But yours--I want to take them on headfirst, want to vanquish all your dragons with you, want to fight every battle beside you."
"Why?" She still couldn't see. Couldn't understand why he would give so much of himself--and his love--to her.
"There have always been two loves for me--my family and the ocean. And now, my heart is with you and Mason, too. I know telling you I love you isn't going slow, but I can't change how I feel. I love you, Grace. And I love Mason, too. More than I've ever loved anyone else."
The simple way he said it again and again, as if loving her and Mason was the most obvious, natural thing he'd ever done, shook her as deeply now as it had the first time he'd said it.
"Is it that easy?" She'd always needed to ask questions, always needed answers. But never more than she did right now. "Can you really just fall in love with someone and then, suddenly, they're your new number one?"
"Isn't that exactly what happened with Mason? Whatever other loves there were for you, they all got in line behind him."
"Yes." He was right. Exactly right. Again.
Grace was reeling from all of it. From her first official date with Dylan. From finding out that her ex had a string of paid-off women behind him. From watching Mason take his first step. From the most explosive--and tender--lovemaking of her life.
And now, from hearing Dylan tell her just how much he loved her in a way she hadn't known a man could express his love. Even her father, who had loved her mother dearly, had never been so eloquent.
One part of her wanted to push him away so that she could be alone to try to process it all. The other part never wanted to let him go.
"It's a small couch," she finally said.
"Good."
And when he slipped her heels from her feet and drew her against himself, her back to his front, cradling her head on his arm, she felt safer--and more cherished--than she ever had before.
*
Sometime in the middle of the night they reached for each other, kissing in the dark. Grace felt as though she were dreaming as she wrapped her arms and legs around Dylan and he came back into her, having already taken care of protection in the dark. And yet, there wasn't anything slow, or safe, about the way they took each other this second time.
How could there be when their hunger for each other hadn't been even the slightest bit sated by their earlier lovemaking?
He slid his fingers through hers, and she held tightly to him as he took her fast and hard over first one peak and then the next without any breathing room to recover. After so long a sexual drought, Grace felt utterly, wonderfully submerged in heady pleasure. She wanted to stay right where she was forever, holding on to Dylan's strong muscles in the dark, his mouth on hers as they both fell over the edge together.
And after, it was so wonderful to curl her body into his, to pull his arm over her chest so that she was holding his hand right over her still quickly beating heart, and to fall asleep safe and warm and, for the moment at least, sated from soul-deep pleasure.
*
Grace woke to the sound of Mason laughing. She knew how lucky she was that he usually woke up on the cheerful side of the bed, happy and excited to greet the new day. But today, she was momentarily lost as to why she was out on the couch instead of in the bedroom with him.
As the cobwebs cleared, flashbacks to the night before came one after the other. Kisses. Caresses.
And whispered promises of love from Dylan.
Her chest tightened where joy should have bloomed instead, and damn it, she was tired of it. Tired of being so wary all the time, of looking for trouble around every corner. So incredibly tired of not knowing anymore how to let go outside of Dylan's arms.
When, she wanted to know, would it be okay to just relax for a little while? And to believe, again, that true love could not only be real, but last forever?
Her parents had had such a sweet love and so did Dylan's. She saw that same love in the lives of his brothers Rafe and Ian, and his sister, Mia. All around her were examples of what was possible.
And yet, even though she wanted so badly to believe, she could still feel the scar tissue deep inside from a wound that hadn't yet fully healed.
Dylan, fortunately, knew that she was still healing and seemed to understand exactly why she was so wary, so cautious. He didn't try to pretend it wasn't the case, didn't try to fool himself into thinking tha
t she could declare her love for him as quickly as he had for her.
But would he continue to be this patient? Or would he, if she couldn't rise above her past fast enough, finally give up on her?
Shivering at the thought of losing someone who had so quickly become the sunlight around which her world revolved, she wrapped the blanket around her naked body and let laughter draw her into the bedroom.
Perhaps after the night they'd shared wrapped up in each other, kissing and touching each other, she should have been better equipped to deal with the sight of Dylan wearing only dress pants, barefoot and shirtless, his face unshaven and scruffy--and looking more gorgeous than ever. She had to put her hand on the doorknob to steady herself for a moment as she watched the most sinfully good-looking man in all creation laugh with her son.
And for now, at least, the shadows that had begun to creep in couldn't withstand the bright joy of the two people who made her the happiest as Mason reached out to kiss her just as Dylan kissed her, too.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Grace was sitting behind her computer while Mason napped the next day, staring at the blinking cursor, trying really, really hard not to miss the man she was writing about, when the phone rang and she saw an unfamiliar number appear on the screen. Dylan had left the day before for Australia and the big, week-long yacht race. He had been as reluctant to go as she and Mason had been to kiss him good-bye, but if things were ever going to have a chance of working out between them, they would have to learn how to give each other the space they needed: Dylan for his boats, and Grace for her writing. This trip would be good for them, she reminded herself as she looked at the number on the screen and tried again to place it.
She'd never been nervous about picking up the phone before leaving D.C. But it was times like this when she immediately thought about her ex and his family and wondered if they had been tracking her after all--if they knew she'd had the baby and now were calling to try to take away her son so that he could continue the Bentley line.
As she let the call go to voice mail, she told herself as she had so many times before to stop looking for danger around every corner. She was just overtired from not getting enough sleep the night before. Not, of course, that she would trade the hot lovemaking with Dylan for any amount of sleep. Some things were well worth losing sleep over, she thought as a small smile moved onto her lips.
Yet again, even without being here, he was making her smile, making her forget the darkness that had so often felt as though it were lurking, waiting to pounce when she was at her most vulnerable.
Feeling much more steady, she hit the Play button on her phone and was surprised to hear a familiar voice. "Hi, Grace, it's Tatiana. I hope it's okay that Dylan gave me your number. Since Mia surprised us all with a wedding, I wanted to surprise her with a party to celebrate it--just the girls. I know this is short notice, but is there any way that you'd be available to come by the set of my movie tomorrow night at six? Can't wait to hear from you."
Even though Grace already knew how nice and down-to-earth the other woman was, it didn't change the fact that Tatiana was still a massive movie star. She couldn't believe that she'd just been invited to the set. Especially when she wasn't at all certain that she counted as "one of the girls" even though she'd been at Mia's wedding.
Not wanting to be rude, however, Grace called back immediately. "Thank you so much for the invitation to Mia's party. I'd love to come," she said honestly, "but I don't know if I'll be able to get a babysitter."
"Sorry," Tatiana said, "I'm a little fried from the scene I just shot today. I think the director actually wants to scrape off a piece of my soul for this movie." The other woman let out a long breath that Grace could easily sympathize with, given that she was feeling just as fried from trying to write her cover story about Dylan. "I also meant to say in my message that you should definitely bring Mason. Some of the other girls will be bringing their kids, too, and I know he'll have a ton of fun playing with them."
Grace had left behind everyone and everything she'd known a year and a half ago, which meant that she hadn't gone out for a drink with any girlfriends in a really long time. Suddenly, a night with the Sullivan women felt like exactly what she needed, even if she still couldn't quite shake the feeling that she didn't really belong in their league. Then again, she wouldn't ever have believed that she could end up with a man like Dylan...and look what had happened when she'd finally let herself go with him: magic.
"Count me in. Is there anything I can do to help set up?"
"Nope, I've got everything covered here. Just bring yourself and your cute little boy. And plan to have fun!"
*
Grace's evening was full, just as it had been for the past ten months, with feeding Mason dinner, then giving him his bath, reading him a story, and putting him to bed. But their bedtime ritual seemed a little bit off. And she knew why: It wasn't just that Mason's second tooth had just come in, it was also because they were clearly both wishing Dylan was there with them. Reading Mason a story. Kissing him good night.
And then holding her tight all night long after making the sweetest love imaginable to her.
Unfortunately, though it was late by the time she finally got Mason to settle down, since she was still struggling with her writing she returned to her computer to put in a couple more hours before she turned in. Forcing herself to hold focus on her article, rather than daydreaming about the main subject's kisses--or letting herself worry that something bad might have happened to him because he hadn't yet called--she began the heavy lifting of revising what she'd written earlier in the day.
Before she could make much headway, though, her phone buzzed and her heart leaped in her chest when she saw his name pop up on the screen.
Grace had promised herself she wouldn't stare at her phone all night waiting for Dylan to call. There had been too many nights when her ex had promised to check in, but hadn't. She'd believed Richard when he'd told her it was because he'd been working late and lost track of time--when, she later found out, he'd been courting the woman he actually planned to marry. Grace had simply been a convenient, and easy, bit on the side.
But Dylan had kept his promise, just as he'd kept every other promise he'd made to her so far. It had been a long time since she'd let herself feel the joy of wanting someone, and being wanted right back. Just as she'd relished the glorious hours in his arms two nights ago, she decided it was okay to relish this lovely warm feeling in her chest right now.
"Hi."
"Have I mentioned just how much I love the sound of your voice?"
Just like that, he had her flushing, heat moving through her. "It's really nice hearing yours, too. How was your flight?"
"Good. Although I may have driven myself a little crazy thinking about you the whole time. I'm so glad you're still up. Once we get going tomorrow morning, it might be hard for me to catch you again, so I really needed to talk to you tonight. Tell me about your day."
"Tatiana called and invited Mason and me to a surprise party for Mia that she's throwing on her set."
"My sister is going to love seeing both of you again. And Mason is going to dig playing with my cousins' kids. Just don't let any of the girls corrupt you. Especially my cousin Lori. She can be a wild one, particularly when she and Mia get together." Grace was amazed, yet again, by how easy he made things sound, as though he wasn't surprised at all that she'd been invited to a big family party when they'd only just started dating. "How's your writing going?"
She knew better than to bother with a good this time. "I'm going to get it soon. I just know it. And until then, I'll just keep plugging away at my computer so that when lightning strikes, I'll be ready."
"Next week on Sunday," he reminded her. "Once we get you out on my boat, it's all going to come together for you."
Her heartbeat kicked up even faster at the thought of sailing with Dylan, just as it always did when she thought about being alone with him in his ultimate domain. Right there in the c
ockpit confessional.
"What about Mason? I've been missing that little guy like crazy. How was his day?"
"It was great. His second tooth finally popped through."
"Every day there's something new and exciting, isn't there?" Dylan truly sounded interested and excited by this small milestone. "We'll have to celebrate his new tooth when I get back."
Dylan's reaction reminded her of how her parents had raised her, where even an event as small as her baby growing another tooth was something to celebrate.
Thinking about how Mason had been a little off all day, she said, "He misses you." But she knew that was cheating. Dylan had given her his all since they'd met, and he deserved better from her. "I've been missing you, too."
"You have no idea how tempted I am to catch the next plane back to you."
"You've got to do this race," she told him. "And you've got to promise me that you'll enjoy it." She'd never forgive herself if she and Mason stole Dylan's truest joy from him.
"I'll trade you that promise for one from you." The tenor of his voice had shifted as he spoke, from playful to sensual.
"What do you want me to promise you?"
"That we won't hang up tonight until you've come for me."
"But--" She could hardly speak around the desire already rising inside of her. "How can I do that when you're not here?"
"Promise me, Grace."
Shocked by how close to the edge nothing but the sexy promise in his voice had taken her, she whispered, "I promise."
"All day long I've been putting together a fantasy about you in my head. Will you help me live it out?"
"Yes."
God, yes.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
"Where are you right now?"
"Sitting at the dining table behind my computer."
"Put your computer away and go over to the couch."
Grace's hands were trembling as she followed his instructions. "I'm on the couch now."
"Tell me what you're wearing."
"A long-sleeved T-shirt and jeans."
"Everything you're wearing, Grace."
The sensual command in his voice--one that had shocked her in the best possible way when they were making love--sent a rush of heat to the tips of her breasts and between her legs. "I'm wearing lingerie I think you'd really like."