He spent the rest of the afternoon in the shed while I washed our dirty clothes in the sink and tidied up the cabin. I wasn’t proving my domestication so much as I was trying to keep busy, to keep my mind from wandering.
It didn’t work. I obsessed and worried over what was bothering Nathan. I ultimately concluded that it must be girlfriend related. Who else, other than a romantic interest, could tick someone off like this? But, then...
Well, there was a chance his anger was directed at me. The other two times he had rescued me, he left quickly afterwards. This time, he has been with me for several days now. We have had no communication with anyone since he had tossed our phones. His girlfriend would have no knowledge of where he was or what had happened to him. Was he worried about her for some reason, and couldn’t do anything about it because he was stuck here with me?
For that matter, why was he with me if he didn’t want to be? It wasn’t like I had made him stay here, to help me, like some captive. If anything, I was the prisoner. He had practically kidnapped me. If anyone should be angry, it was me.
So now, after hours of stewing, I found myself glaring at him from across the kitchen counter where we both stood, eating bowls of ravioli in silence. Either he didn’t care that I loathed him, or he was truly oblivious, and I highly doubted the latter. His indifference further infuriated me and, when I finished and dropped my bowl in the sink, I snapped.
“What in the hell is wrong with you?”
Nathan had just taken a bite and slanted his eyes to me wordlessly.
“Don’t say nothing either. You’ve been a grouch all afternoon,” I added before he tried to deny it.
“There’s a lot on my shoulders right now,” he said tightly, as if forcing himself to stay calm, though he looked close to snapping himself. It seemed I had managed to piss him off more than he already was. Not that I cared.
“You don’t have to be here,” I hissed. “I didn’t ask you—”
“No, you didn’t.” He pushed away from the counter and shot me a scathing look before he turned away.
“You can go if you want,” I called to his retreating back.
“Oh, really?” He spun around to me. “You think you could manage by yourself?”
“I’ll be okay. I don’t need you.”
Lies. All lies.
From the iciness of his glare, I figured he was considering walking out the door and never coming back. I wanted to take my words back, to tell him I didn’t mean it. I did need him. I knew that.
I also didn’t want him here against his will and taking the unfairness of the whole situation out on me either. I didn’t know what was going on. I didn’t know why he was here, why he felt like he had to be here, or why he thought he had to help me.
“I know you don’t want to be here,” I added softly, suddenly more sad than angry.
He stared at me and some of the chill in his eyes thawed. “You don’t know anything.”
“Yeah,” I scoffed, “because you won’t tell me anything.”
“You know a lot more than you should.”
“You tell me just enough to shut me up,” I countered.
He raised his eyebrows at my choice of words. “What more do you want to know, Kris?”
“I want to know everything.”
His eyes lowered to the floor, and he shook his head. When his eyes lifted to mine again, they were hard and unwavering.
My anger surged. “Fine. Don’t tell me a damn thing. I’ll figure out how to manage without you. I don’t need your help.” I shouldered past him in a rage-induced march to the door. “I need some air. I’m going for a walk.”
“Kris...”
I stopped in the doorway, but didn’t look back at him. “Don’t worry. I won’t go far.”
I was sure that was what he had been about to say. Not an apology, not an explanation, not anything I wanted to hear. I didn’t give him a chance to prove me wrong before I slammed the door shut behind me. I knew I would only end up disappointed.