CHAPTER 15
I was about to tell him I had developed a long time ago when he explained what he meant by ‘develop.’ Apparently, that was the term used by hybrids to describe the point in their human adolescence during which they started to develop their god-like qualities.
And—surprise!—according to Nathan, I must have been a hybrid because I was showing the changes all hybrids exhibited when they started development. I didn’t believe him at first, not until he showed me my eyes in the bathroom mirror.
That was where I was now, staring in awe at the black ring that encircled my irises. It deepened the amber, made it look darker, bolder. It was definitely new.
I glanced at Nathan’s reflection as he stood in the doorway behind me. He had shown me the subtle silver rings that circled his irises and, now that I was aware of them, I could see them. There even appeared to be tiny specks of silver mixed into the blue that I couldn’t believe I hadn’t noticed before. It was what made his eyes pop. I peeled my gaze away before I got lost in the beauty of them, and stared at the foreign ones that looked back at me.
He had said all hybrids formed a temporary black ring once they started development and formed permanent rings upon reaching maturity—silver if they chose Kala; gold if they chose Skotadi. It was the easiest physical way to tell the difference between the two.
I couldn’t remember if Alec’s eyes had a gold ring, or not. I didn’t think so. The other Skotadi’s eyes had shone so bright it looked like a fire burned behind them. Alec’s had definitely not looked like theirs. This new discovery only made me doubt Nathan’s certainty that Alec was a Skotadi even more, but I wasn’t about to tell him that.
He was leaning casually against the door when I turned to him. “Okay, I believe you. I’m a hybrid.”
He raised his eyebrows, visibly surprised. I figured he had been prepared for a long debate, and wasn’t sure how to take my easy acceptance. I was a little surprised myself. It wasn’t only this. I had handled everything I’d been dealt the past few days rather well.
Maybe I was in shock?
I squeezed past him, out of the bathroom. “How could I not know about this?” I spun to him as he trailed behind me. “Or you? How did you not know?”
Nathan stared at me like he also wanted to know the answer to that question. He leaned against the back of the chair, and his eyes followed me as I moved to sit on the edge of the bed across from him.
“When we found you when you were little…” He started hesitantly. “That family wasn’t your real family, was it?”
My family, whose murders I had witnessed when I was three years old on the night I have tried for fourteen years to forget? My father, who had been shot in the entryway? My mother, who had stashed me in the pantry seconds before she too was gunned down? My older brother…
“None of them were hybrids,” he added softly. “At least one of your parents would have to have been a hybrid for you…”
For me to be a hybrid. Oh, God. That meant either my father had not been my father, my mother had not been my mother, or neither had been who I thought they were. Good thing I was already in shock. My world was crashing down around me, little by little.
I groaned, and rested my head in my hands. “I don’t know,” I mumbled.
I felt the bed shift, and knew that Nathan had sat down beside me. I felt his presence, radiating like a nuclear reactor. I wondered if it was a hybrid thing, being uber-aware of the other, or if it was just his effect on me.
“I’m sorry, Kris.”
It was three small words, but they broke me more than any winded monologue could have. The tears I had been holding back for days seeped out. I cried for Gran, for Callie, for Alec. I cried because of all the weird things happening to me that I couldn’t explain; because everything I thought I knew about my life, and about myself, was wrong; because I was frustrated, angry, and scared. Most of all, I cried because Nathan’s compassion was what I have craved all along. It tugged at all the emotions I had buried, and pulled them to the surface.
It was a good hard cry, the type that left me gasping for air. Nathan had no idea what he had unraveled in me, and sat silently beside me as I let it out. After a moment, he got up and I felt the void his absence left. If it were possible for me to cry harder, I would have. Then he was back, holding out a wad of toilet paper for me. I took it sheepishly.
“I don’t know where this is coming from,” I wailed as I blotted my eyes.
“Take your pick,” Nathan said softly as he reclaimed his seat beside me. “You have a lot of reasons, and you’ve been so strong for so long. I’m surprised you didn’t break down sooner.”
I peeked at him through my heavy, wet eyelashes. He thought I was strong? His unexpected words of encouragement were just what I needed to get a grip on my emotions. I even managed a weak laugh at myself and, from somewhere deep down, pulled together some bravado.
“So I have a hybrid parent out there somewhere,” I concluded with a sniffle.
“Yeah, Kris,” Nathan said gently. He shook his head, visibly upset with himself. “I shouldn’t have assumed you knew. You were only three.”
“It’s okay. I was so young I don’t remember much about them, let alone remember if I had other parents before them, or knew where I came from, or…”
I knew nothing. Each day, I learned how little I had known about my life and the world I lived in. Nathan had known more, and this twist had taken even him by surprise.
“So, I’m a hybrid. What happens to me now? What’s next?” I asked with forced enthusiasm. It would have been more convincing if my voice wasn’t shaking and I wasn’t oozing tears that just wouldn’t stop.
“I guess it’s time for you to head to the base, meet the others.”
Right. Safety in numbers. I liked that idea.
“That is assuming you choose the Kala,” Nathan added.
I gave him a look that expressed there was no doubt as to the side I would choose.
“Right,” Nathan said. “Well, on the base, you’ll start training with others in development, and learn what we are and what we do. Over time, you’ll become stronger and faster, and you’ll start gaining a natural expertise in one or more of those specialties I told you about. It’s gradual, and it’ll take a while for you to know what you’re good at, and longer yet for you to master it. The base is a good place to learn along with others like you.”
I was curious about what specialty I would have. Maybe I would have a bunch of them, like Nathan. I wondered if I would share any of his specialties.
But then that would mean we shared a bloodline somewhere along the way. Wouldn’t that mean we were related? My stomach flip-flopped at the thought, and not because I wanted to be related to him, but because I desperately wanted not to be. It was bad enough we shared the same last name, but what if he ended up being my cousin?
What if I was attracted to my own cousin?
I pushed the thought out of my head before I said something stupid and embarrassing. Instead, I managed an intelligent question. “How long does the process take?”
“Two, maybe three years.”
I might have to wait that long to know if we were related? I bit my tongue, mentally chided myself for caring, and then remembered something that took my mind off it. For now. “Does my aging slow now too?”
“Not until you complete development.”
So, not seventeen forever. The way this year was turning out, I considered that good news. Eighteen had to be better. It had to. My sanity couldn’t take another year like this one.
Nathan’s eyes were on me, studying me like he expected me to go bat-crazy any moment. “You okay?” he asked.
I nodded slowly. I might lose it on him tomorrow, but for the time being, my sanity was in check. “When did you realize I was changing?” I asked him.
“I suspected it when I noticed your fever,” he admitted. “I didn’t know for sure until I saw your eyes.”
“You had no idea???
?
After the recent turn of events, I couldn’t help but be a little suspicious. Had he known all along what I was? Was that the reason he kept coming to my rescue, why he was here now, why Skotadi were after me?
“I had no idea.” He sounded sincere and, while I knew there was something about his presence in my life that he wasn’t telling me, I knew he wasn’t lying to me now. He was just as surprised by all of this as I was.
“Is everyone surprised when this happens?” I asked.
“Most of us know what we are and know it’s coming, but it still sucks when it hits.”
I shuddered at the unpleasant memories. “Does everyone get that sick?”
He nodded with enthusiasm. “I remember sleeping on the floor next to the toilet most of the time.”
I couldn’t help the short laugh that escaped me and, when I glanced at Nathan, he smiled. Funny, with everything that was going wrong, and of all the things that should have been on my mind, all I noticed at that moment was that he did have dimples.
“Want to go for a ride?” he suggested, snapping me out of my reverie.
I gave him a look. “If you’re trying to make me feel better, threatening me with a ride on that death machine isn’t the way to do it.”
“Come on,” he urged. “We’ll get something good to eat. I know you’re starving, and I’m sick of eating nothing but macaroni and cheese and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for five days.” He rose and tugged on my arm to stand me up.
I was famished, and the thought of some good hot food was tempting. I certainly deserved a good meal after...
“Wait,” I gaped at him. “Did you just say five days?”