“For all we know, we have only minutes,” Alamos argued. “This illusion could have begun days ago.”
I felt her frustration; I knew that she had her doubts about the time of day as well. Suddenly, chills spread across my skin, and the hair on the back of my neck rose; I felt something. Drake was staring at me, and his eyes widened as he leaned slowly forward. His emotion caused Landen to turn to look at me.
“Wake him,” Drake said quietly, keeping his eyes locked on mine.
My trembling hand reached for Dane’s knee, and I squeezed it as hard as I could. Perodine, August, and Alamos were now frozen in place, staring at me and Dane, who sat forward abruptly. I didn’t look at him. My eyes were locked with Drake; I felt safe in his gaze. A look of terror, though, was across my face.
“Calm...be calm...hide the emotion of fear...think of something else,” Landen thought.
I tried to, but I could feel the cold of the darkness all around me. Every muscle in my body tensed and began to tremble, and the beat of my heart was as loud as drums in my head. I held my breath for so long, I felt dizzy.
“Stand and walk her to me,” Drake said quietly to Dane, who was still staring at me as he stood.
Dane put his arm around my waist. As we stood, from the corner of my eye I could see a dark shadow on the edge of Dane’s Aura. As we moved to Drake, we woke Marc; the darkness hovering around me and Dane was the first thing he saw, and he jolted up and searched the room for Landen. Finding him, he climbed over the back of the couch and walked backwards to Landen’s side. Landen had been slowly stepping closer to me, wanting to take me away from there. August and Perodine were behind him, searching for an idea to save me. I felt them suppressing their fears, struggling to make their energy as strong as they could. When we reached Drake, he reached for my hand; his warm, mesmerizing touch brought a calm that I wasn’t capable of finding on my own. When he saw the relief in my eyes, he moved his eyes above me and pushed me behind him into Landen’s arms. I turned and saw a dark wall floating in mid-air; it moved from side to side, teasing us. A low growl came from the shadow, and Drake raised his hand - sending a force of energy at the wall. Landen shielded us with his energy. Drake’s energy was repelled by the wall, which sent back at us the shields of energy that we were all hiding behind to protect ourselves from the blow. The cloud then evaporated, taking its chill with it.
Suddenly, I felt the tension in the room release. Marc pushed through us and leaned over the couch where Beth was sleeping. “Mom, are you OK? Wake up,” he said as he reached for her shoulder.
Drake turned to look at Marc. “She won’t wake for at least twelve hours,” he said in a low tone.
As Marc’s eyes moved to Drake, anger engulfed him. “You drugged her,” he accused.
Landen let go of me and walked to Marc’s side, reaching for his shoulder to give him a sense of calm - but Marc brushed him away. “No, this is uncalled for! How dare you? What else have you done to her?!” he yelled.
Drake’s expression was placid. “I wasn’t going to allow her to listen to all of you debate my execution; she’s endured enough,” he answered.
I looked at Landen.” You knew that’s what he was doing,” I thought, offended that he hadn’t told me.
Landen looked at me.” I knew he wanted to protect her from what was to come; I didn’t know he already knew what they were going to ask you to do,” he answered. His eyes reflected the truth I heard in his thoughts.
I stepped forward, angry at Drake. He refused to look me in the eye. “You knew...you knew what they were going to say. If you knew, then you know a different way out of this – and if you don’t, you better find one because I refuse to touch that knife to take anyone’s life.”
Dane and Marc were staring at each other, realizing what they’d missed as they slept.
“Love, it’s either you or me – we have no choice,” Drake said, letting his eyes rise to meet mine.
As I stared back at him, I felt the intent of the room; they were going to convince me, show me that there was no other way to break through this illusion in which we were all trapped. I felt so outnumbered, overpowered, angry; I pushed by Drake and began to run from the room. I felt Dane behind me; the others stood still. I reached the hallway. I was going to go to the string, to find a way around the wall, an image, anything - just a way out. I knew if Rose were there, if my parents were there, they’d defend me, tell me that murder was never an answer.
I’d made it to the fourth doorway before I felt Dane’s arms around my waist. I pulled against him, but his strength was overpowering, and he turned me in his arms. I struggled against his body until the anger surfaced in breathless tears. My body finally numb, I reached my arms around Dane’s shoulders, and his arms tightened around me. He let me cry, holding me as tight as he could.
“I can’t kill him,” I said over and over again.
“Calm down. You can’t think like this,” he said, rocking us back and forth.
I breathed in and let the tension in my body diminish, then my tears stopped. I stepped away from Dane and wiped my face dry, then leaned against the wall and stared at him.
“They’re insane – all of them. It’s like Alamos and Perodine have been playing a game of chess, and Drake, Landen, and I are the pieces...neither of them realized it was the devil’s board, that in the end he’d find a victory,” I said, tucking a strand of my hair behind my ear.
Dane’s eyes held sympathy for me. “He’s not going to win,” he said.
“Taking a life before its time is a victory for him. Letting this dimension suffer to the degree that it has is a win for him. They’ll always remember Donalt’s rein, and they’ll never release themselves from the fear of his presence.”
“Willow, they will forget. This is only the beginning; you have to have faith that all that you’ve done will be worth it,” Dane said
“Worth it? There is nothing worth the destruction I bring,” I argued.
“You haven’t done anything but dodge what those insane people have put in your path,” Dane said, reaching for my shoulders. “And for the record, I’m not a fan of any of them.”
“Well, I’m going to dodge another one because I’m not killing anyone,” I said, crossing my arms.
Dane let his arms drop from my shoulders and stepped back. He then ran his hands through his hair and sighed. “Are they sure they’re reading it right – that you have to do that?” he asked.
I nodded. “All of them agree - and apparently that doesn’t happen often,” I said in a low tone.
“August agrees?” Dane asked.
“He didn’t argue once he heard that when the darkness consumed Drake, it would kill Landen, then overtake me,” I said, a sick feeling rising in my throat.
An understanding came across Dane’s face. “Listen to what you just said: even if you allowed it to take over you – would you want to watch Drake’s body kill Landen? They’re asking you to take the lesser of two evils; everything you’ve lived through so far will be in vain if you don’t stop it from ending your life too soon,” he said sympathetically to me.
“The lesser of two – would you be referring to Drake, someone you hate?” I said.
“I may not like him, but that doesn’t mean I want him to die. After hearing everything I’ve heard over the past few days, I’m surprised he’s as stable as he is,” Dane said, defending himself.
“If that bad soulmate stuff they were talking about has any weight at all, then that means there’s someone for him. Chances are, she looks just like me...what I am going to do if I find my ‘twin’ and she’s lonely? Am I supposed to tell her, ‘Oh sorry, he found the bad soulmate first, and he got in my way - so I had to just kill him?” I said sarcastically.
“Your twin?” Dane questioned.
“They say we all have one,” I said, raising my eyebrows and considering the possibility for the first time. “I’ve been one before; that’s the only way I can understand the dreams Drake is havin
g. He said he strengthens himself with the memories of them – but it’s impossible for it to have been me; Landen is the only one I can complete.”
“How long was I asleep?” Dane asked, confused on how he’d missed so much.
“Not long,” I said, looking down the hallway to the study.
“What if she’s not here? What if she’s waiting for him in his next life?” Dane asked.
“You’re not going to convince me to kill him,” I said, glaring up at him.
“I’m just saying, Willow. You don’t know; no one knows. All you can do is take what’s in front of you and make a choice; that choice will lead to another, and then another,” Dane said as fast as he could.
I looked down. He was making sense - they all were - but I was the one that would hold the knife...I was the one that would have to live with this for the rest of my life.
“You know that no one ever really dies; you saw that in Pelhan’s world when Livingston stood in front of you,” Dane said.
“Livingston lingers because he feels his life isn’t complete; he wants to see us all in this life. Drake’s life isn’t over. He’ll linger too, a lost soul.”
“Willow, this is just one guy’s opinion, so don’t hate me for it, but if he loves you half as much as he says he does, his life was over when he saw you choose Landen – twice,” Dane added.
“So you’re saying, ‘He’s suicidal - so it’s fair?’” I said, holding back my temper.
“No,” Dane said, rolling his eyes. “If he was suicidal, he would have found an easier way to die. I’m saying that he’s struggling to find a purpose now and that he wants to lay his life down for you. Telling him that he can’t is just as painful as losing you for a third time; all of you will die in vain.”
I slid down the wall and pulled my legs to me. I wanted it all to go away; I wanted to feel the way I did when I was one with Landen, to live in that bliss and hide from the pain in which the body lingered. Dane leaned against the opposite wall and watched me struggle with my thoughts; he felt helpless. I was surprised that he hadn’t been more forceful with me. I knew my decision not to kill Drake would sentence us all to death.
I felt Landen, then looked up and saw him and Marc walking my way. Half way to me, Marc halted. Dane understood the wordless direction and walked further down the hall; they were giving me and Landen a barrier, which was as much privacy as we’d be allowed to have. Landen reached me and sat down at my side. He then wrapped his arm around me, and I hid my face in his neck. I felt the beat of his heart against my cheek and watched as his chest rose and fell. My imagination took me to watching Drake kill him in a dim future, and I held him tighter as I pushed the thoughts away.
“Willow, I love you. I don’t want you to have to do this alone, but I can’t help you,” he thought.
“I would never ask you to kill for me,” I thought quietly.
Landen moved his shoulder so I’d have to look at him; his blue eyes looked deep in my soul. “I would, Willow, but that’s not why I can’t help you now,” he thought.
“What are you not saying,?” I thought as my eyes raced over his face.
“August demanded that they show us why they were so certain. When they read the scroll again, Alamos argued the theory that it would simply kill Drake and enter me, that because you loved me it would have your heart, your power instantly.”
“They said it couldn’t live in a soulmate,” I argued.
“They thought that because of Oba. Alamos argued that Donalt told him the words he used against him were for his sons - not him. He could be stronger; we have to prepare ourselves for that scenario.”
“No,” I thought. As the reality of losing Landen came to me, tears pooled in my eyes. He pulled me into his lap and held me as tight as he could.
“I’m going to fight to stay alive; promise me that you’ll do the same,” Landen thought.
I nodded and kissed his neck softly, then let my face rest against his warm skin. “I feel blind; I can’t feel Alamos or Drake, and Perodine seems to hide her emotions from me at will...I don’t know who to believe or if what I’m being asked to do is right.”
Landen let his hand run across my back. “Everyone in that room’s sole intent is to keep you alive, for you to be the person you’ve fought to be for so long,” he thought, kissing the top of my head.
“How can Drake be so content with dying?”
“He doesn’t want to die; he thinks he’s saving your life by surrendering his.”
“He told you that?”
“No; I can feel it. He did tell me not to look at you when it begins, and that if it manages to enter me - one look into your soul would be all it needed,” he thought.
“He’s helping you.”
“He’s protecting you; I’m just his source.”
“It’s not fair, Landen. What are we going to say to Beth when she wakes up?”
His arms tightened around me, and I felt his grief for Beth for everything she’d endured. “I don’t know. I’d hope that she would focus her attention on Preston and help us defeat this monster.”
“I can’t imagine them facing this one day.”
As I felt the defeat in front of me, tears burned in my eyes. I didn’t ever want my sister to feel the emotions that were coursing through me right then. A fear came through Landen, but he quickly suppressed it and brought forth the emotion of hope. “I’m more than sure that when their time comes, they’ll be more prepared than you or I.”
“What if it’s you? I can’t bear the thought of doing this to Drake. I know I won’t be able to do this to you,” I thought, sitting forward on his lap and staring into his eyes. I put my hands on his face and traced the beautiful indents of his dimples, which were hiding from me. He took a jagged breath and leaned his forehead to mine; he was doing everything in his power to remain calm, to keep me calm.
“You have to, and even if I lose this fight, I’ll go to Pelhan’s and wait for you to finish what we’ve started. We will never be apart; I promise you. I need you to see it that way.”
“Landen.”
“Willow, listen to me: no one ever really dies; this is just a passage. Don’t let this monster kill you.”
I felt Dane and Marc’s frustration; they’d both turned at the sound of our voices and were staring at us. Landen waved his hands, urging them to turn away. He then cradled my face with his hands and forced me to look into his eyes.
“I know you hate me telling you that there’s a reason for everything – but there is. I want you to think of Libby – our Libby – and think of Allie. I want Brady to know that we did everything in our power to keep her safe. Preston, his life has been tested already; he deserves a chance to fill his purpose. You have to put your thoughts there. This isn’t about who you love or how much you love them – this about a way of life for more people then we could ever imagine.”
As his words consumed me, I let out a breath that I’d been holding in. I then nodded as I set my intent to protect them, to protect their purpose at any cost. As he felt it, Landen smiled and pulled my face to his; he then let his lips rest gently on mine before he kissed me. I felt myself growing stronger in his embrace; he sent a calm through me that was hypnotic.
As he released me, he stared in my eyes, and I could see his Aura growing brighter, wider, and more powerful that it had been the entire time we’d been there.
“How are you doing that? “ I thought, smiling slightly.
“Following Drake’s lead; calling on my memories of you and me,” he thought.
My smile left; I was relieved that Landen was able to make himself stronger with a single thought, but I didn’t want to give Drake’s memories any reality.
“They’re not of me,” I thought quietly.
Landen tilted his head and looked at me curiously, then smiled slightly. “You think you have a twin,” he thought. I nodded. “ I do, too,” he thought.
“You believe the ‘bad soulmate’ story?” I thought.
<
br /> “I don’t know. They believe it; there’s no doubt there. It’s just...that image you saw me with looked just like you,” Landen thought.
“I didn’t think so; I didn’t recognize her,” I thought as the dark memories of Landen holding another girl the day we destroyed the looking glass came to me with a surge of jealousy.
“To me, she did,” Landen thought, sending a rush of his love through his arms, which were holding me close to him.
“I want to find her – if you think she’s real,” I thought.
“When that wall falls, I’ll take you wherever you want to go,” he thought.
I looked in Dane’s direction. I thought about going to the string anyway, but the memory of the screaming voices of my family hindered my desire.